by Lucy Monroe
“It is near impenetrable.”
“I can see that. My family here, if they had a mind to, could protect Eadan from Percival’s evil intents with little effort.”
“He has no need of their protection. He has mine.” Was that still in doubt in her mind?
Shona smiled up at Caelis, her lovely green eyes sparkling with the love she’d admitted to. “I know, but surely you can see the irony?”
“I do.” Though he did not like the fact she was still thinking of others protecting their son.
“I’m not,” she said, exasperation twisting her smile.
“I said nothing.”
“Did you not?” she asked, her eyes saying otherwise.
But he truly had not. He had not thought his feelings aloud, either. He was sure of it. He had never heard of mindspeak being so much like mind reading before. The latter being a myth parents told their children about in stories before bedtime.
Their traveling party was stopped and questioned at the gate, but let through because they were with Prince Eirik. Nevertheless, a small contingent of Chrechte soldiers accompanied them to the keep and did not leave them until dismissed by the Balmoral.
Caelis had no doubts the man would be able to point them in the direction of Shona’s family. Lachlan knew his clan from the oldest Chrechte to the youngest human infant, by sight and by name. The laird not only participated in training all the soldiers, Chrechte and human alike, he spent time training with the Cahir each sennight as well.
His wife, the Lady Emily, took a personal interest in all the families of the clan, no matter their origins and encouraged friendships between her children and those of the kitchen staff as much as the highest-ranking warriors.
Moments after explaining their quest to find Shona’s remaining blood relatives here on Balmoral Island Caelis was speechless from the knowledge imparted by Lachlan.
Shona was not so affected. “You are my cousin?” she asked the laird, her eyes shining with delighted interest. “How can this be?”
She was no doubt thrilled to discover her familial connection to the one of the most powerful Chrechte lairds in the Highlands.
“His mother was human,” Emily, the laird’s wife, offered. “It is not nearly as difficult as you might imagine.”
The Balmoral smiled indulgently at his wife, but shook his head.
“Actually, my great-aunt who left our island to join her mate among the MacLeod was Chrechte. She was sister to my father’s mother.”
Lachlan looked at Shona expectantly. She stared back, uncomprehending.
“You are saying her grandmother was Faol?” Caelis asked his voice near faint with shock.
The Balmoral laird nodded. “Aye.”
“But I’m human!”
“Those of mixed parentage are as likely to be born human as Chrechte,” Lady Emily offered with an interesting look for her husband.
“But my father was human.”
“He was,” Caelis affirmed. He would have been able to tell otherwise; it would have been revealed in the man’s scent.
Lachlan shrugged, apparently unconcerned by the fact his cousin had been human. “His mother was Faol.”
But then, Lachlan’s own brother had been human, with no wolf to share his nature. By all accounts, their father’s reaction to his firstborn being unable to shift had caused resentment and eventually Ulf’s death.
’Twas a sobering lesson not to be dismissed by a man with one Faol and one human child already.
“That explains Uven’s predecessor appointing my da as seneschal.” Shona sighed, the sound filled with weary pain. “My father never told me. Anything.”
The fresh betrayal in her voice sliced at Caelis’s heart.
Lachlan nodded as if he understood. “He was raised in a clan where the Fearghall had a deep stronghold. No doubt he believed he was protecting you.”
“Perhaps he was taught, like we were, that to reveal the true nature of the Chrechte meant death?” Audrey offered, her concern for her friend apparent.
Clearly accepting neither explanation, Shona looked up at Caelis, her expression filled with pained helplessness. “Why?”
Ignoring the others around them, he turned to face her, cupping her cheeks, wishing he had an answer that could take away the pain. “I dinna ken, but this I know: it was not your doing. The lack was in your da, not you.”
“I loved my parents. So much.”
“They loved you, too.” Neither had been effusive in their affections, but in their years among the clan, they’d shown the high esteem they held their only offspring in.
“It does not feel like it.”
She had too many fresh memories to supplant the ones from her childhood, when she would have been certain of their love and care. And maybe that explained how sure she was that Caelis did not love her.
“They made mistakes, but they did not stop loving you.”
“My father had to know how horrible my marriage would be for me and yet he pushed me into it.”
Because her father would have known that Shona was true mated to Caelis or she could not have conceived his child. Caelis himself did not understand why the man had not returned to the clan to tell him of his child.
Shona’s father must have known that Caelis would have claimed his true mate pregnant with his babe, no matter what his laird had dictated.
Instead, the former seneschal of his clan had forced his daughter into a marriage he had to know would be difficult, if not impossible, for her.
Only because she was more human than Chrechte had her body allowed penetration by the baron. Caelis could be grateful for that, because had her body responded like a Chrechte’s, Shona would have been subjected to even more pain.
He was certain of it. The dead baron had been a lecher and a cur.
“He thought you were fully human,” Caelis said to Shona now, knowing it would be little comfort.
“I’m not.”
Caelis would not gainsay her on that claim. There was too much to support her supposition, though he’d never heard of a non-shifting Chrechte exhibiting other traits of their race.
It bothered him that he could not tell what Shona thought about the fact she was part Faol, but there could be no denying it either. Her reaction to her marriage to the baron was far more Chrechte than human and the strange way Caelis and Shona sometimes read each other’s minds could well come from latent Chrechte gifts.
“You do not have a wolf.” Of that he was certain.
Her eyes sparked with unexpected mischief. “I thought you said that you were mine as much as I am yours.”
Relief flooded Caelis. If she could tease, she was not too devastated.
He would never again allow himself to be surprised by the depths of his mate’s strength.
“He’s your mate, then?” the Balmoral asked.
Caelis took a deep breath, surprised at the tension filling him that he had to force himself to ignore. The time had come to declare his intentions before her family.
Shona looked up at him, her emerald gaze questioning.
He leaned down and kissed her forehead before stepping back and facing Lachlan. “You are her closest kin, are you not?”
The Balmoral stood, clasping his hands behind his back. “Aye.”
“Shona is mine.”
The laird did not reply, but his expression challenged Caelis’s claim without words.
“I will marry her.”
Vegar made a snorting sound and turned away. Caelis glared at him, only to shift that scowl to Thomas when a sound very much like a laugh came out of his mouth as well.
“Will you?” the Balmoral asked, the challenge in his tone unmistakable.
Caelis opened his mouth to set the man straight when he caught sight of Shona in his periphery. He was doing this for her, to show her she had value in his sight.
“I am declaring my intent to you to make Shona both my mate and my wife.”
The Balmoral inclined his he
ad, but did not answer. Instead, he turned to Eadan. “Is this MacLeod soldier your father?”
“No.”
Caelis felt that word with the power of a dragon’s blow. He had to lock his legs in place, or he would have stumbled from the pain of it.
“He is not?” Lachlan asked, surprise in his tone.
“He is not a soldier. He is laird, and soon the whole clan will know it.”
“Ah…and is this soon-to-be laird your da?”
“Yes.” Eadan crossed his arms, his mouth set in a stubborn line. “He and Mum are mates.”
Lachlan nodded, his own expression thoughtful. He focused his attention on Marjory. “What of you, little princess, do you call Caelis ‘Da’?”
“I calls him Daddy,” Marjory said in her high-pitched little girl’s voice. “He’s a big dog.”
Caelis found himself smiling at her view of his conriocht, though they would have to teach her discretion in how she referred to him.
Still ignoring Caelis, Lachlan turned to Shona. “You are my cousin, a Balmoral by blood if not by birth.”
“Thank you,” Shona said.
What did that mean? Why was she thanking him? Did she want to be a Balmoral? She’d said she would marry him. She would not go back on her word. Even if he had six years ago.
He would freely admit to himself, if no one else, that Shona was made of stronger stuff than even a Chrechte warrior could lay claim to.
“There is a story behind a Chrechte of honor who did not know he had a mate, or a son, much less a daughter to claim, the last time I saw him a month ago.”
Shona nodded. “There is.”
“That this same man I have considered both friend and courageous warrior somehow executed the bond between sacred mates and then allowed you to become separated is an unarguable truth.”
Caelis would not deny it. “Aye.”
“He intended to marry me,” Shona offered, surprising Caelis. “Our laird denied Caelis’s request for permission to do so, however.”
“And rather than leave with you, he stayed with the Fearghall.” Lachlan gave Caelis a look that made him feel like squirming.
But nothing compared to that moment he thought his son had denied him.
“Aye,” Caelis answered, though the question was not for him. “By my own stupidity, I lost my true mate for six long years.”
It got no easier to admit upon repeating.
“That would explain your celibacy. I wondered if you were not simply a more dedicated warrior than most,” Lachlan mused.
Shona made a small sound of distress. He looked down at her. “What is the matter?”
“That time is over. We are to be wed now. This is the matter of importance, not the past.”
“Is it?” Lachlan asked.
Shona nodded most earnestly at the Balmoral laird. “It is.”
“You would accept his suit for your hand?”
“I already have.”
“And yet he still brought his intentions before your family.”
Shona looked up at Caelis, her eyes shining with gratified pleasure. “Aye.”
Finally, he had done something right.
Lachlan nodded and met Caelis’s gaze. “You have shifted from Fearghall to Cahir, embracing every sacrifice necessary, training with total dedication to protect all Chrechte. Your plans and destiny are to serve our people with your life, but none of that justifies dismissing the needs of your mate. Remember that.”
Lady Emily nodded, giving her husband and true mate a loving look.
Caelis could not disagree with the sentiment, but questioned his true dedication to it. Shona had agreed to marry him, but she had also made it clear she had no desire to return to the MacLeod clan.
Could he turn away from one destiny for the sake of another?
The simple answer was that if he honestly intended to put Shona’s needs foremost in his mind, if he were to honor the sacred mating he had been blessed with, Caelis did not have a choice.
“No!” Shona spun to face him. “Stop thinking in this manner, Caelis. I insist!”
“What are you talking about?” Audrey asked, looking askance at both Caelis and Shona.
Shona was wringing her hands and frowning. “He believes that in order to serve our mating best he must give up his destiny to take the MacLeod clan from Uven, but that is not true.”
Caelis expected Lachlan to get angry that he would even consider such a thing, but the older laird merely asked, “Why do you believe this?”
“Shona does not want to return to the MacLeod.” And finally, he must stop ignoring that truth.
“That is not true,” his mate immediately and vehemently disagreed.
Caelis turned to her in shock. He had never known her to lie, but she’d made no secret of her feelings. So, how could he believe her words now, no matter how his senses told him she spoke the truth?
“I did not wish to return to the clan with Uven as laird. Even in my own mind, I had not made that distinction until now, but Caelis, you must believe me. I loved our clan, I love our people and I would serve them with you, by your side.”
“So, you would marry this man despite a past that left you alone with a child by him?” Lachlan pressed.
Caelis would knock the laird back on his ass, but for the fact he appreciated Shona’s newly discovered family showing such protectiveness toward her.
Shona nodded, her small, feminine body held tight with sincerity. “I would.”
“Our priest will bless your union before the evening meal,” Lachlan announced.
Caelis expected Shona to balk. Tradition dictated marriage Masses be performed in the morning. She was one who liked to make her plans and she’d been appalled by the speed and lack of ceremony associated with Audrey and Vegar’s wedding.
But she smiled wide. “That would be lovely. Will the priest speak a blessing over Vegar and Audrey’s wedding as well, do you think?”
Audrey sucked in an excited breath. “Oh, would he?”
Lady Emily smiled, her brown eyes sparkling. “I am sure he would. He is quite accustomed to unorthodox weddings.”
Both Shona and Audrey showed delight at this answer.
“Why do we need a blessing?” Vegar asked, looking bewildered.
Audrey crossed her arms and gave a glare that no doubt did Shona proud. “So we can tell our children about something other than a laird’s words while you stood ready to come to blows on the stairway.”
* * *
Shona stood before the Balmoral priest, ready to speak her vows with Caelis. Meeting Lachlan had been amazing and wonderful. To know she had family that cared, to know her children had had options for safety even before fate had brought Caelis back into her life gave her such a sense of peace.
But she did not want to stay on Balmoral Island, despite the beauty and obvious closeness of the clan, or the fact that their laird claimed her as family.
Her future and the future of their children lay with Caelis and his destiny to protect his people and the humans of the MacLeod clan from the false doctrines of the Fearghall. It was her destiny as well. She could feel the truth of that deep in her soul.
It would take those not of the Faol to turn the thinking of the Chrechte among the MacLeod clan from the misguided teachings of the Fearghall. Those wolf shifters would not come to see humans or the Éan as individuals worthy of life, much less respect if Uven succeeded in pushing all but the Faol from the clan.
She and her children would make the Faol stop and think about all they had been taught by that deceiving blackguard. Vegar’s strength and honor as a warrior would challenge their beliefs that the Éan were the ones to be despised as lesser Chrechte.
But in this moment, her destiny was not paramount. The vows she would speak were. And everything within Shona longed to make these promises before God and man with her warrior, to bind them together with the ties of law and honor.
The priest said the wedding Mass with warm feeling, his attitud
e that of a friend though they’d never met before Lachlan had introduced them.
The homily he spoke about marriage was both moving and funny, but all laughter faded as he led Caelis to speak first his vows and then Shona to utter hers.
Caelis maintained eye contact through each word, reminding Shona that no matter who was there as witness, the ones who truly mattered were her and him.
The priest spoke his blessing over both newly married couples before the clan celebrated the marriage of their laird’s newly discovered cousin.
* * *
Shona faced Caelis in the tower room Lady Emily had offered for their wedding night.
His big body glowed golden in the firelight, his muscles rippling with power and strength that both excited and soothed her.
This man, this shape-changer, was her mate, her husband. And she loved him.
Now and forever.
“You are my gift,” he said quietly. “The blessing I never deserved but could not live without.”
“You did live without me.”
“I survived without happiness, without pleasure. Every day of the six years we were apart, I ached for you. The years I believed you lost to me through death, I was little more than a shell. My one purpose with any meaning was to serve my brethren, but I had no hope of anything for me, or for the future. You give me a future laced with joy, filled with pleasure, worth living not just for my people, but for my own life as well.”
His words fell on her heart like rain on the parched summer ground. “Our future is what we make it. The past no longer has any bearing.”
“Do you truly believe that?” he asked. “You have forgiven me?”
“Yes.” She meant it with every fiber of her being, too.
He nodded and moved forward until he stood directly in front of her, his body heat reaching out to wrap around her like a touch. “This is the last time you will dress an English baroness.”
“I am a laird’s lady, but no baroness any longer.” He could not know how much that pleased her.
Chapter 23
Ignore the sacred teaching and the lessons of the past at the peril of all Chrechte.
—ANCIENT CELI DI