Alice giggled and wiped the gathering tears from her eyes. “Okay, you win. I think that actually helped a little.”
“Mission accomplished.” Rosa smiled and handed over the phone so Alice could cradle it in her hands while she watched the video until the end. When the picture froze, Rosa said, “Listen, baby, you’re gonna be—”
Soft yet firm lips pressed against hers, cutting off the verbal reassurance she’d planned to offer. Rosa relaxed into the kiss and pulled Alice closer to her over the center console.
After everything they’d been through since their last go-around at camp, she had no reason to doubt Alice’s ability to successfully teach a small classroom of semi-sober campers how to assemble and program basic robotic devices. Over the past twelve months, Alice had endured a volatile coming out to her parents, two months of markedly increased online threats—and, on occasion, in-person comments—directed at Rosa after her infamous article and the backlash it had spawned were the subject of a widely read essay about feminism and gaming, and countless other daily challenges she’d largely met with remarkable grace. Occasionally, Alice endured bouts of anxiety so acute she suffered physical symptoms. Once, a series of particularly graphic threats of sexual torture against Rosa—messages Rosa had tried and failed to hide on social media—had caused Alice to descend into a weeklong battle with unrelenting nausea so severe it forced her to call in sick to work, which had made Rosa sick as well, with guilt. Yet as bad as that had been, this, the two-week run-up to Alice’s first teaching experience, was the worst Rosa had ever seen from her. Stomachaches, insomnia, irritability, the works.
It was agonizing to watch Alice struggle to do things so many others found natural and easy, but Rosa had learned that her best move was to simply be there to provide support, and listen, and never judge. Even when the worst came to pass and it was her crap that triggered Alice’s distress, running away was no longer an option. Alice’s pain belonged to Rosa, and vice versa.
They were together now, with all that entailed.
The sound of a throat clearing in the backseat pulled them apart right as Rosa’s hand dropped to brush the side of Alice’s breast. “All right. Enough encouragement.” Trayvon’s deep voice was an unwelcome reminder that their weekend of little to no solitude had already begun. “At least while I’m in the car. You guys want me to leave?”
“Yes,” Rosa said, at the same time Alice insisted, “No.” Rosa frowned at Alice, then glanced over her shoulder into the back. “He could go check himself in.” When Trayvon shrugged to indicate his willingness to follow orders, Rosa returned her attention to Alice. “He doesn’t mind.”
“I mind.” Alice kissed Rosa’s cheek before smiling fondly at him. “Tray is a big part of my moral-support team. I don’t want to lose him to the debauchery of Camp Rewind just yet.”
Trayvon scooted forward and rested a hand on Alice’s shoulder. “I’ve got you, Al. Don’t worry. Besides, I’m too excited about taking your robotics class to abandon you for the first hot guy I find.”
Rosa snorted and gestured at Alice with a fond look. “You never know. I did meet the love of my life in this very place…”
Alice practically swooned, then moved in for another soft kiss, breaking away only when Trayvon cleared his throat for a second time. Alice shot him an apologetic grin. “Sorry. Camp does crazy things to me.”
Rosa nearly swooned also at the memory of their first weekend together, when painfully shy Alice had both captured her heart and set off on the sometimes arduous journey to become the woman she was today. A woman Rosa loved more than life itself. They’d had countless great times since that weekend, and a staggering amount of phenomenal sex, but their first few days together would always hold a special place in Rosa’s heart. That was when Rosa had finally chosen to heal, to move forward, to live her life again. Lifting Alice’s hand to her lips, she kissed the knuckles and winked. “I can vouch for that. Crazy things.”
“Well, I can’t wait to find out.” Trayvon shifted closer to the passenger side door, fingers on the handle. “Just remember, Al. You’ve done the camp thing before, and look how well it turned out. This time, you’ll have plenty of friends here with you, so it’ll be even better.”
Better is pretty much guaranteed, Rosa thought privately. This time, I won’t break her heart.
“We’ll have a blast,” Rosa murmured, keeping her tone calm and steady in an effort to engender the same in Alice. “Maybe Marcia will even let us use the paddleboat again.”
Alice giggled at the memory, and the reference, like Rosa knew she would. “All right, let’s go in. The anticipation is the worst part. I’ll feel better once I get inside.”
“That’s my girl.” Trayvon opened the car door and slipped out into the fresh afternoon air. “Pop the trunk, Rosa, and I’ll unload our bags.”
Rosa did as requested but put her hand on Alice’s arm to stop her from leaving quite yet. She wanted to make sure to finish what she’d planned to say earlier. “Alice, you’re gonna be great. You showed me how to build our fighting bot and taught me to make all kinds of repairs. If you can teach me, you can teach anyone. I promise.”
Alice snorted softly, yet seemed pleased by her comments. “Well, you’re a geek and an enthusiastic student. You also enjoy your all-access pass to my body far too much to give me a hard time about my teaching methods. Plus, I’m comfortable with you. It’s different.”
“Maybe so, but I’ll be there with you tomorrow. You know me and Trayvon won’t let anyone give you a hard time, right?”
Alice’s nostrils flared as she nodded. “I know.”
“You’re brilliant, and when you talk about the subjects you love, you’re so passionate and exciting to listen to. You know how to build stuff most of us can only daydream about creating, and when you explain even the most esoteric concepts to me, I feel like I sort of get it. I completely understand that you’re concerned about sounding ineloquent because you’re nervous, but you shouldn’t worry. You’ve dealt beautifully with so many social situations since we’ve been together. More than one person has told me they couldn’t even tell you were shy at all.” Rosa waited to let the words sink in, then concluded by saying, “I’m very proud of you. Proud to be yours. Proud to watch you keep raising your goal posts higher.” By this point Alice had turned a lovely shade of pink that Rosa yearned to feel against her lips. She kissed the heated skin gently, then murmured, “You’re my inspiration…but you knew that already, didn’t you?”
Rosa had never kept that a secret. The example Alice set for her every day had become the strongest driving force behind her ongoing recovery from the public shaming and Internet terror campaign. Watching Alice consistently withstand episodes of mental anguish in the pursuit of normalcy, simply because she wanted so badly to feel content, had convinced Rosa to do the same. Alice’s positive influence was the sole reason she was currently poised to change her life once again, a thought she couldn’t dwell on too long lest she tumble into her own personal rabbit hole of imagined doom.
“I love you,” Alice whispered, giving her a final, lingering kiss. “I couldn’t do this without you.”
Rosa shook her head, once. “You could, but I’m so happy you’re not.”
A knock on Alice’s window drew their attention back to Trayvon, who stood next to their pile of luggage and gestured impatiently for them to get out of the car. “At least steal a boat first!” he called through the glass, with a smart-assed grin.
Alice broke into a giggling fit that left her bent at the waist, wiping moisture from her eyes. “Fine, let’s go check in.”
Rosa got out of the car and joined Trayvon at their pile of bags. She hefted the large one she and Alice had decided to share, then shouldered her extra backpack. When Alice busied herself at the passenger side door too long, checking again to make sure they hadn’t left anything behind, Rosa said, “Remember what Dawn told you: every fear you overcome leaves fewer potential ways for your anxiety to ruin
a future day.”
Alice snorted and finally got out of the car, closing the door behind her. “I know, I know. She says this is good for me, and she’s pretty much always right.” She grabbed her extra backpack, then paused when Rosa’s smartphone rang from its temporary home in her jeans pocket. She pulled it out and looked at the display, a smile instantly breaking out across her face. “It’s Bree.” She thumbed the speaker button without hesitation. “Hey, Bree! Are you here yet?”
“Hello, sweet Alice.” Their friend’s voice held a distinct note of satisfaction. “Do me a favor and tell your woman she owes me fifty bucks.”
“You just did.” Alice giggled and met Rosa’s eyes. “But why?”
“Because you answered her phone.”
Alice shot her a questioning look, and Rosa offered a sheepish shrug in response. “When she was knocking sense into me last summer, we may have made a bet about where your and my relationship would be a year later…” She raised her volume. “Is that what you’re referring to, Bree?”
“I’ve had my eye on a purchase for months now, waiting for this day.” Bree gloated audibly, clearly tickled to have won a wager Rosa had long forgotten. “Anyway, we’re a few miles down the road. You guys already there?”
Alice’s face lit up at the news of their proximity. “Enid’s with you?”
“Hi, Alice!” The cheerful reply elicited simultaneous grins from both Alice and Rosa. “Hey, Rosa! I can’t wait to see you two again in person.”
“Likewise.” Over the past year, Rosa had become surprisingly close to Enid through regular online chats and weekly phone calls, finding her to be an excellent source of objective advice and nonjudgmental support. She’d saved Rosa from doing something stupid to ruin her relationship with Alice more than once. When she and Bree agreed to join them for a mini-reunion at Camp Rewind to celebrate Alice’s teaching debut, Rosa had been overjoyed at the opportunity to revisit the fun atmosphere of camp and bask in the glow of friendships that had only grown stronger with time. “Bad news, though…there’s a rumor Marcia might hook us up with a private cabin, since Alice is here in a professional capacity.”
“Bummer,” Enid answered smoothly. “Maybe we’ll get an invitation for a slumber party?”
“Slumber party!” Bree said enthusiastically in the background. “I love Camp Rewind!”
Alice turned a deeper shade of red, made worse by Trayvon’s knowing leer. She handed the phone to Rosa, who switched off the speaker as they walked closer to the front entrance. Warmed by the way Trayvon looped his arm around Alice’s waist and marched them confidently toward the main office, Rosa murmured, “Well, you just managed to embarrass the hell out of my girlfriend.”
“Is it terrible to admit I’m glad that’s still possible?” Terrible or not, Bree sounded unambiguously gleeful. “She’s so cute when she blushes.”
“Yes, and she’s adorable right now, believe me.”
“We’ll check you in, Rosa,” Alice called over her shoulder. She paused to blow Rosa a kiss, wearing a bashful grin that did little to hide exactly how much she’d secretly enjoyed Bree and Enid’s teasing. “So you can finish your call.”
Pleased by Alice’s unexpected display of confidence, Rosa agreed despite her instinctive urge to stay close. Alice didn’t enjoy feeling too clingy, and Rosa knew better than to challenge her instincts. “All right.”
“Did we scare her away?”
Rosa snorted at Enid’s question, delivered as it was in a voice of pure innocence. “For now.” She walked back to the entrance of the camp to get a view of the parking lot. “I’m waiting outside for you two fools to arrive.”
“Sweet of you. Now, Rosa,” Bree said in a tone that clearly signaled a change in topic. “This morning, I read something rather interesting online. An announcement from a major publisher about an upcoming nonfiction, semi-autobiographical book about public shaming in the Internet age…written by a woman whose bra and panties I once picked up off the floor?”
Rosa rolled her eyes at Bree’s typical instinct to veer into the inappropriate. “That’s me.”
“Wow, a book?” Enid’s surprise made it clear that Bree hadn’t yet shared the news. “That’s great, Rosa. Congratulations.”
“Thank you.” Rosa endured a renewed torrent of her own worries as she considered the floodgates she was likely to reopen by venturing back into public life. “I’m hoping it’ll help people gain a better appreciation for how the whole situation felt from my perspective, but I’m also worried it might be the stupidest decision I’ve ever made.”
“More stupid than saving an explicit video of yourself showing both your naked pussy and your easily identifiable face to an inherently insecure ‘cloud’ storage location?”
Rosa had to chuckle at the sound of Enid giving Bree a well-deserved smack in reaction to her blunt comment. It had taken her some time, but Rosa could appreciate the humor in the situation when pointed out by a good friend. “Touché.”
“Seriously, Rosa, nothing could be as bad as what you’ve already endured. By publishing this book, you’re reclaiming your dignity. Your voice.” Bree actually sounded a little choked up. “I’m really fucking proud of you, and that’s the truth.”
Bolstered by the approval, coming as it did from someone whose friendship she valued, Rosa accepted the praise with a quiet murmur of thanks. “I appreciate that.”
Enid radiated sympathy. “You’re worried the book will stir everything up again?”
“Yes,” Rosa said plainly. “I know it will, at least a little. But I need to learn how to live my life despite that, if I ever want to regain my confidence and sense of security. And, you know, if I ever want to speak to the issues I care about again. Alice knows what could happen, but she begged me to go ahead and submit the book to my publisher anyway. She thought it was the right call, and I think…” She paused and allowed a wry smile. “I think Alice is a very smart woman.”
“You’ve come a long way since that day you told me you’d rather dump Alice than let her life be ruined by an association with you.” Bree turned smug. “See how my excellent advice panned out? Maybe I’m in the wrong profession. I should be a therapist, or at least a life coach, or something.”
“You’re a real superstar.” Rosa fought to keep a straight face as a trio of excited new arrivals emerged from a parked car and began to unload their bags. “But, yes, fine, you were right. Things have been great with Alice. At this point, I trust wholeheartedly that nothing the outside world throws at us will tear us apart. More than that, I realize that I’m our relationship’s own worst enemy and, thanks in part to you, have vowed never to give in to my self-destructive instincts again.”
Enid spoke up, honey-voiced. “You did all that, darling?”
Bree chuffed, her pleasure obvious even over the spotty reception. “No big thing.”
“It was both of you, actually.” Rosa stepped aside to let the small group of exuberant campers walk past her toward the main office, then broke into a sunny grin when a familiar sedan pulled into the lot and parked. “But your contributions aside, I have to hand it to Alice. She’s stronger than I could have ever imagined. More importantly, I love her like I never knew was possible. She makes me want to be strong, like her. She makes me brave.”
“That’s wonderful.” The driver’s side door of Bree’s car swung open and its owner emerged. She broke into a smirk as she ended their call and opened her arms in greeting. “Now get over here and give me a hug, you sappy dope.”
Rosa went. It was true—she was a sappy dope.
But also a happy one.
*
Later that night, in a secluded clearing of trees well away from the bonfire around which most of the camp partied, Alice stood within her close circle of friends—Rosa, Trayvon, Bree, Enid, and Jamal—and lit a joint that she quickly passed to the right. Trayvon grinned at her and took a drag, then passed it along to Jamal, who eyed their surroundings nervously as he followed suit.
<
br /> “Jamal, relax.” Trayvon reassured him as he gestured at the impressively tall redwoods that encircled them. “Who’s going to bust us out here?”
“I’m not worried about Marcia,” Jamal said, and exhaled a massive lungful of smoke while handing the joint to Bree. “It’s the snakes, man. Woods are full of ’em.”
Outwardly calm, Rosa turned to stare at Alice with wide eyes. “I forgot.”
Giggling on the inside only, Alice wrapped her arm around Rosa and pulled her into a sheltering embrace. “I’ll protect you,” she murmured, kissing Rosa’s cheek. “Don’t worry.”
Rosa accepted the joint from Enid so she could take a long, desperate puff. “He said the S-word. Of course I’m worried.”
Alice took the next hit, a big one, and stretched to press her mouth against Rosa’s as she blindly passed the smoldering joint off to Trayvon. Employing a trick Rosa had taught her almost exactly one year ago, in a spot not terribly distant from where they were standing now, she gifted Rosa’s lungs with smoke from her own. She smiled as she backed away, unsurprised when Bree felt the need to offer a suggestive comment.
“If you two aren’t looking for anyone to crash your slumber party, you might want to cut that shit out.” Bree paused to suck on the end of the joint, then held it out so Enid could do the same. “Some of us get turned on watching women kiss each other.”
Heavy-lidded already, Enid raised a hand and flashed a crooked grin. “Guilty.”
“And then there are those who crave a more masculine display,” Trayvon remarked, and gave Alice a playful pinch on her elbow. He shot Jamal a sideways look. “You get many men here looking to hook up with other guys?”
“From time to time,” Jamal said lightly. He took a casual draw from the joint as it continued its circuit around the group, the threat of snakes apparently forgotten in the wake of Trayvon’s question. “When I’m lucky.”
Enid’s eyebrow popped as she glanced between the two men. “Yowza.”
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