by Shae Black
I’ve never said the words, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness or in health but I would have, if he would have asked me. I pluck the rings from the box with determination and slide them on my finger without a glance to see how they look, I don’t care. I care about what they represent, everlasting, undying, faith filled, and irrevocable love. I lift the sheet that covers my husband and slide in next to him careful not to disturb any of the many leads and tubes. I tuck myself under his arm, holding it against me as he would if he were awake.
This is what he wanted, marriage, me by his side, partners facing all that life has to throw at us, and it has a lot. “I’m here for you, forever, no matter what. I’ve found my rings and I’m wearing them. You didn’t give me the chance to accept a proposal but I’m telling you I would have said yes without a second of hesitation. I promise to be your rock, in good times and bad, I promise to never abandon you, to support you and care for you. I will accept you for whoever you were, who you are and whoever you will be in the future. Let no man separate what God has joined together.
Marcus you lit a fire in me that brought a part of me to life I didn’t know existed, don’t let it be blown out. Those are my wedding vows to you. Now I just need you to wake up so we can say “I do” to each other and live happily ever after.” I hear Elena sniffle and tissue being whipped from the box next to the bed. “I’ll leave you two alone for a little while, come get me when you’re ready.” Opening my eyes Elena is standing on the opposite side of the bed, eyes red rimmed and nose running. “No, stay, I just had to say that to him. You don’t have to go.” Turning my face I kiss him, slide out and rearrange his covers. Just one moment more, I slide my hand into his and brush a wayward wave from his forehead and allow myself the pleasure of running my fingers through his thick dark hair and grabbing it at the top of his head I whisper to him. “Don’t leave me here alone.” “He won’t leave you, I know it. He’s never had more to live for. Right brother?” She strokes his arm affectionately as more tears trail down her cheeks.
I need to lighten this mood, I’m officially a bride now right. I’m supposed to be happy, yea right. “Time for the wedding reception, let’s eat.” I say as playfully as I can with a forced smile. She finishes setting up dinner and we sit opposite each other at the rolling bedside table. “It smells so good Elena, mmmm, and tastes even better.” The pasta melts in my mouth and my protesting tummy begins to settle. “From the sounds of your stomach I made it just in time, you’re noisy.” “Yea I know, the only time I eat is when you bring me food, anything else is sub-par now.” “Oh, stop, thanks though, Marcus was always better at cooking than me.” Their cooking seems pretty equal to me, both make delicious traditional dishes.
“Hey Imani, have you seen a strange lady around here? She doesn’t really fit in with the usual visitors and I’ve seen her in the lobby but never visiting anyone.” “No, what’s she look like?” “Kind of mousy, short, slight, hair looks like she chopped at it with sheep shears, no makeup and a little crazy in the eyes.” Yikes, I’m glad I haven’t seen anyone fitting that description. “No, I haven’t seen anyone but I did have a weird experience in the bathroom my first night here.” “Yea? In the bathroom? What happened?” “Some whacko lady asked me for a cigarette, from inside the stall, can you believe it? Smoking in a hospital, don’t people know how dangerous that is with all the oxygen?!”
Elena pauses, fork midair. “She asked you for a cigarette?” “Well not exactly, she said something about smoke and I just figured, ya know?” “Imani, did she mention the color of the smoke?” “Well, I don’t remember. Why?” I look at her sideways scowling, something’s bothering her. I’m not gonna like this. “When I was coming in the front entrance the other day I saw the woman I just described, she said something to me about having dark smoke inside of me when I walked past her. She made my blood run cold Imani, totally freaked me out. Then today I swear I saw the same woman coming off another elevator onto this floor. She didn't speak to me, actually I don’t think she even saw me.”
I place my fork across the corner of the plate and rest back in my chair to think. What exactly did she say to me in the bathroom? Something about dark smoke, yes, now that I think about it she said nearly the same thing to me, it has to be the same woman. “I do remember now that you mention it, she told me I didn’t have the dark smoke. I just figured she was asking for as smoke. Who do you think she is? She creeped me out too.”
She squirms in her chair before hitting me with yet another blow of information that I don’t want to hear. “Imani, the night you went to Dominus with Marcus and had to be rushed home, there was a woman in the club with a knife. Security spotted her with night vision cameras, she was coming up behind both of you.” Fucking hell, a knife? The woman who broke into my bedroom in Seattle had a knife, and she was short and slight. It could be the same women, and if it is she’s been so close to us! Oh my God! I can feel the blood draining from my face as I begin to tremble, the food in my stomach suddenly churns and begs for escape.
Thankfully there is a garbage can next to the bed and I easily lean over and vomit the only thing I’ve eaten in nearly 24 hours. “Oh shit Imani, I didn’t…” She’s cut off by shrill alarms suddenly sounding and a heart monitor screaming for attention. God Marcus! The line on the screen goes flat, he’s coding. I have been an ICU nurse for over 10 years and have run more codes than I can even remember, I’m supposed to know what to do. But, in this horrible sickening moment I’m a wife not a nurse and I’m frozen and stunned. This isn’t supposed to happen, he’s supposed to fight for us and wake up! The room is flooded with nurses and doctors in seconds, all doing exactly what they are supposed to do, but I can’t move.
My heart cannot continue beating without his, he’s dying and so am I. I watch as a nurse shoves Elena out the door but they can’t move me so they slide my chair to a corner out of the way with me in it. I watch them frantically perform CPR, pushing drugs into his IV, shouting orders to each other and unsuccessfully attempting to save his life, my life. Mercifully my crazy mind assists me in escaping the harrowing scene before the pain can set in, before the grief can consume me. The room blurs and tilts until I’m plunged into the dark again, this time I pray it will be forever. There is no surviving without him, he goes, I go.
The End
Table of Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 34
Chapter 35