Tears ran down Kirstin’s cheeks.
“What’s wrong, Mom? Are you feeling sick?”
“No, just happy and proud and lucky. You’re a jewel, Katie girl.”
“Because of you, Mom, because of how you raised me.”
“That’s the nicest thing you could ever say to me, honey. I just wish Sandi and Steve …”
“He’ll come around, Mom. Just give him time. He’s supposed to phone tonight.” If he does as I told him. “The balloons are from me, the flowers are from him.”
“They are?” Kirstin smiled and perked up.
“Yep. The card’s still attached. Just says, ‘Welcome home.’”
“I’ll call him and thank him.”
Katie grasped her arm and halted her. “Later, in case he’s vintage Steve today. Don’t risk spoiling your big event. Please.”
“Since you did all this work for me, the least I can do is obey.”
“That’s a good girl,” Katie echoed Kirstin’s words from the past. “Sandi’s going to call tonight, too. I talked to her yesterday and she wishes she could be here. I’ll fetch your suitcases. Gimme the keys, and no arguments, young lady.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Kirstin strolled around and admired her new home. It was large enough for two people, and she had a king-size bed and lots of closet space. She wished Christopher was there to share this moment, and the rest of her life. Where was he? Why hadn’t he spoken to her by now? Please, God, don’t let it be the worst.
After Katie returned, they joined forces to unpack and prepare lunch, then savored it in the eating area. They sat on the sofa and chatted for hours about Katie’s work, Kirstin’s adventures, future plans, the past, and the men in their lives.
“Playing the field, isn’t that what it’s called?”
“Yep. Maybe one day I’ll find somebody special, too. Until then, I’ll keep looking and trying out the merchandise.”
“Do your old mom one tiny favor, just make sure he’s special and deserving before sharing yourself with him in such a manner. Dating is so different from when I was young.”
“You’re still young.”
“I’m nearing fifty, Katie girl.”
“That isn’t ancient, Mom, and you look ten years younger than that.”
“Only ten years, a ripe forty?”
“Your math’s off, thirty-five if mine’s accurate.”
“You always were a top student, just like Sandi. Poor Steve, some subjects gave him fits.”
“Only because he hated to study and speak up in class. I had a couple with him that one year we were both at UGA. Steve has a bad habit of wanting everything to come easy and quick. Remember how he almost screwed up his first promotion at the bank? You can’t put pressure on a boss for a raise or a promotion until you’ve earned them.”
“I see you’ve learned a lot about work since moving here.”
“It’s the only way to succeed. I love doing commercials and modeling and movies, even if most parts have been tiny ones. The worst thing is the competition; there’s so much of it. I have to watch every bite that goes into my mouth and exercise every day, and never go to bed with makeup on.”
Kirstin laughed. “All that nagging was to stop stains on pillowcases and to keep that lovely complexion clear.”
“It worked, thank goodness. You’ll be amazed how great I’ve become in the kitchen. I eat balanced meals, exercise, and get enough sleep. I’ve become a real health nut.”
“It shows; you’re a beautiful and vital young woman, Katie.”
“You’re biased. Out here, there are thousands of girls with better faces and figures, with more credits under their belts, too. But I have courage, determination, and confidence: things my mother taught me.”
“Things my daughter helped me learn. I—”
“I’ll get it,” Katie offered after the doorbell chimed. “Maybe it’s the neighborhood welcome wagon, so you should answer it, Mom.”
Kirstin looked through the peephole, then opened the door. “My heavens, what’s this?”
“Flowers for Kirstin Lowrey. Sign here, please.”
As soon as she did so, Katie passed a tip for the delivery man over her mother’s shoulder. The girl closed the door and Kirstin carried the large arrangement to the kitchen to check the water level.
“There must be two dozen of them.”
“Try three dozen, Mom. Here’s the card. Who’s the sender?”
Kirstin opened the small envelope and smiled. “Christopher …”
“Well, what’s the message? Or is it private?”
Kirstin handed the card to her daughter, too full of emotion to speak.
“Wow, ‘I love you and miss you like crazy. My proposal is still on the examining table.’ That’s pretty clear to me, Mom; he’s nuts about you.”
Kirstin smelled the fragrance of the numerous red ‘roses nestled amidst feathery ferns and baby’s breath. “Was I a fool to leave, Katie?”
“No, Mom, so don’t beat yourself. You’ve always been the one to do and sacrifice for others. It’s time for you to think about you and your needs.”
“I need him, honey.”
“You also need research, don’t you?”
“Yes, but …”
“Trust me, Mom, you’ll have both. These say you’re on his mind. As soon as he gets to missing you and … all you shared, he’ll come running.”
“What about that male pride and ego you mentioned?”
“Loneliness and an empty house will dissolve them.”
“It won’t be empty after Monday; his housekeeper’s returning then.”
“That isn’t the same as having you there day and … night.”
“Do you really think he’ll change his mind?”
“Natch. What man in his right senses would risk losing you?”
They chatted again for a time. Then, Katie suggested, “Why don’t you give the good doctor a thank-you call while I drive real slow to fetch us Chinese food from down the street? I know what you need. I’ve been reading up on diabetes. I even talked with your new doctor and he gave me a copy of your diet plan. We’ll have a toast after you get a full belly and it’s safe. When you’re relaxed and calm, you can talk with Steve.”
Katie left and Kirstin picked up the phone. She almost held her breath until he answered. “Hello, stranger. I got the roses, Christopher; they’re beautiful. You know how to get to a woman’s heart, don’t you?”
“I’m trying every trick I can think of. I’m sorry we kept missing each other. Emergencies, a shower, and chores got in the way. You didn’t leave your number at your last stop, so I couldn’t call back. Lordy, I miss you. This place is like a tomb with you gone. It’s already a mess and my cooking’s lousy. How are things on your end?”
“Good and bad. It seems like a month since I’ve seen you, but Katie has done wonders with the apartment.” She related details about her new home and all her daughter had accomplished.
“Damn, I was afraid it would be too much competition for me.”
“No more than the ranch is my rival. So, when are you coming to visit? Is next weekend too soon?”
“Not soon enough to suit me, but it’ll have to do.”
I’ll get you here and change your mind, you stubborn devil. “Make sure you don’t run into any emergencies to stop you.”
“I’ve already asked a friend to be on call for me.”
“Good. I’ll have a special meal waiting for you.”
“All I want and need is you waiting for me.”
“I have been since I left the ranch.” No, no, Kirstin. “I went through some beautiful country that would be ideal for camping trips. Arizona is loaded with beautiful views.”
“We didn’t pick out an RV while you were here. I’ll take John and Maria with me next week and let them help select one.”
“Or we can do it during one of my visits there, unless you’re in a rush.”
“No hurry; we’ll do it l
ater. It’s a short plane flight between us.”
“You’re flying?”
“Yep, to save time. I want every minute I can have with you.”
“That suits me perfectly, Doc.”
“You been taking good care of yourself?”
“Following doctor’s orders and having no problems. You healed me fine, in more than body, Christopher. I hope …”
“You hope what, Kirstin?”
“I hope I helped you, too.”
“You solved a few problems but you created a bigger one.”
“Like what?”
“Like getting me addicted to you then taking away my drug supply.”
“You did the same thing to me.”
“I wasn’t the one who left.”
“That isn’t fair, Christopher.”
“I know, and I’m sorry. It’s just that I miss you.”
“I miss you, too. I love you, Christopher, please believe that.”
“I do but it doesn’t make being separated any easier.”
“Have you … considered what I said?”
“I’ve thought of little else except you and our situation.”
There was a short silence “Has Jenny’s baby been released from the hospital yet?”
Making small talk to change the subject? “Some time next week; he’s doing fine, just needs a little more weight. Frank said to tell you hello.”
Don’t press him anymore tonight. “I like him; you’re lucky to have such a good man working for you. How are John and Maria?”
“Haven’t seen them; they went camping this weekend.”
“Making up for missing our trip together?”
“Yep.”
The door opened and Katie entered. She shrugged, Sorry.
“Katie’s here. She went for Chinese food. She says hello.”
“Go eat while it’s hot. I’ll talk to you in a few days. Bye, Kirstin.”
He hung up before she could say goodbye. She gazed at the receiver for a moment before replacing it.
“Did I interrupt at a bad time?”
“No, honey. It was a little strained, but that’s natural. We sort of danced around words and tried to avoid touchy topics.”
“Don’t worry; it’ll get better soon. When’s he coming to visit?”
“Next weekend.”
“Give him the royal treatment and he won’t want to leave.”
“I don’t know, Katie; it didn’t sound encouraging in that area.”
“Stop fretting and come eat. Strict schedule, remember?”
“If I forget it, this blasted condition reminds me fast!”
“Mom, take your test now. You look a little pale and shaky.”
Kirstin focused on herself for a moment and realized what those symptoms meant: add fuel now. “You’re right. When I see the doctor, I’m hoping he’ll take me off my medication. I think I can control this with diet and exercise. I’m having to eat extra snacks or pop glucose tablets to prevent lows. That won’t be good for my weight, and weight is a big factor.”
“I’ll set the table while you do your thing,” Katie offered.
“Thanks, honey. I’ll need a clear head and stamina when I talk to your brother.” Lord, how I dread this first talk in a month.
“Don’t take any nonsense from him, Mom. By the way, your mail’s in the desk drawer, too. You have a package from Medic Alert.”
“Probably my identification bracelet. Christopher bought me this one.” She held up her wrist to show Katie. “He was always doing nice and thoughtful things for me. I feel like such a traitor for leaving him. Blast it all, I shouldn’t feel guilty for being myself and being honest!”
“Mom, your blood test and food,” Katie prompted.
“You’re right; I am getting moody and feisty, aren’t I? Glucose coming in, and I need a fix badly.”
Kirstin stood at the door with Katie. “I hate to see you leave, honey. Are you sure it’s safe to drive back this time of evening?”
“It isn’t far, about two hours. I just zip up Interstate-5. There’s plenty of traffic around on Saturday night. I’m sorry. I can’t stay as “planned and show you around; a sleepover would have been fun. That’s the peril of leaving your number with the service. With that modeling assignment tomorrow, I need to look my best. You rest. Take a bubble bath and check out where I put everything. I’ll call you Monday night to check on your job. Stop worrying and enjoy this fresh start, Mom.” She hugged Kirstin, kissed her cheek, and left.
Her son hadn’t called by nine. Kirstin took a deep breath and lifted the receiver. “Hi, Steve. I’m in San Diego now; I arrived this afternoon. Katie’s been helping me settle in but she had to leave for home; a last-minute job came up. Thanks for the flowers. It was a nice surprise.”
“It was Louise’s idea; she sent them.”
Kirstin heard and felt the chill in his voice. “How was the cruise? Did you have a wonderful time and good weather?”
“Yes. I hired a stranger to take care of your grandsons.”
Kirstin continued to try to sound light. “How did they like her?”
“Fine. You’ve been out of touch a long time, Mother.”
“Didn’t you and the children get my letters and presents?”
“Yes, they came while you were sneaking across the country.”
“Are you trying to make me feel guilty because I didn’t babysit?”
“If you don’t want to spend time with my kids, you don’t have to.”
“That isn’t true, Stephen Lowrey, and you know it. I’ve kept those boys plenty of times for you and Louise, and I love them, just as I love you.”
“You have a strange way of showing it, Mother.”
That’s enough. “So do you, son. Every time we talk, you seem to be intentionally cruel and hateful to me. I don’t understand what’s gotten into you, Steve. I want to spend time with the twins, but not become their fill-in mother or on-call sitter. You expect me to drop everything and come running when you call. I have a life, too, Steve. I have to work and support myself. I was always there for you children. What have I done to hurt you and create such bitterness? Why do you have this need to manipulate me?”
“You call asking a favor of my own mother being manipulative?”
“It’s the way you do it, Steve, and how you behave if I don’t jump.”
“I’ve never forced you to do anything for us.”
“Not physically, but you work on my emotions. I’m not up to that, and I wasn’t up to babysitting for ten days.”
“Oh, yes, you wanted a nice vacation alone, right?”
“I needed it, Steve. I have a problem that could have made keeping the twins dangerous for all of us.” She revealed news of her diabetes and past problems, but left out Christopher for now; she didn’t feel it would be to her benefit to give him two shocks at once.
“So you had the health and energy to travel the country for a month but not enough to rest here for ten days?”
She hoped and prayed his insensitivity stemmed from his ignorance about the disease. Either he wasn’t hearing what she said, or was ignoring it in fear, or he didn’t believe her. She would send him a booklet to enlighten him. “How much rest could I get while chasing two active boys?”
“Louise doesn’t have a problem with that, so why would you?”
“I’m not Louise; I’m much older and I’m diabetic now.”
“You’re right; you’ve become a much different mother since Dad died. The boys’ and Louise’s feelings were hurt when I told them you didn’t want to come and visit, before, during, or after your long holiday.”
“If you truly believe I’m that selfish and unfeeling, you don’t know me at all. I’m hurt” and disappointed that you would even think such wicked thoughts and say such cruel things to me. You weren’t like this before your father died, and it isn’t my fault he was killed, or that he didn’t give you and the girls the time and attention you deserved. But to use your children to pu
nish me by telling them such lies is cruel. I’ve tried to do everything I could for you, but no matter how much I do or give, it never seems enough for you. I only have so much time and energy to spend. Until you do some serious thinking and accept me as a person, a parent to respect, we shouldn’t talk for a while. Goodbye, Steve, and I do love you.”
Kirstin wiped tears away with a tissue and tried to tell herself things would improve one day. She was tempted to call Christopher, but she didn’t want to cry on his shoulder and turn him against her son before they even met. If Steve didn’t come around within a few weeks, she would tell him about her marriage plans and let him deal with it as best he could.
The phone rang. Kirstin cleared her throat and answered it.
“Hi, Mom. It’s great to hear your voice.”
“Sandi! I’m so glad you called. It must be some godawful hour there.”
“Yes, but you’re worth it. How is the place? Katie said it’s a dream.”
“It is. She was going to spend the night, but they called her about a job tomorrow in Los Angeles. The other model is sick and the shoot, as she called it, is set up and can’t be cancelled without costing the company a lot of money. They asked her to fill in.” She and her oldest daughter talked about the apartment, Kirstin’s new job, her vacation, and Christopher.
“That’s wonderful news, Mom. I’m so happy for you. Katie filled me in yesterday. She’s mighty impressed by the sound of him. So am I.”
“You’ll like him, Sandi. I wish you could meet him soon.”
“Maybe I will. I’m coming for a visit the last week of the month. Is that okay? Got room for me and the little tyke?”
“Yes. Oh, I can’t wait. How is he doing? How is Cliff?”
Sandi gave all the news about her son and husband. She talked about their plans to return to America next year.
“Where are you two planning to settle?”
“Texas … or California. Actually, California is our first choice.”
“Here?”
“That’s right. That’ll put us all close together again. Steve won’t be too far for reunions and holidays. How is my baby brother and his family? He doesn’t write much.”
Taking Chances Page 32