by Amy Brent
What it felt like to cum for the first time in my life.
Then finally, my eyes found it. The case was shining, and the name was right on the spine, and I plucked it from the shelf before I turned it over to look at the cover.
“Never Been Kissed?” Kelly asked. “You’re getting him a Drew Barrymore movie?”
“This was the movie we first had sex to in my dorm room,” I said.
“Oh, my gosh. This was your virginity DVD,” Kelly said.
“He brought it over as a joke, at first. You know, because I was a virgin. But, we started watching it, and he held me. Really close. It was the first time I’d ever been held by someone I considered a man, and I felt so safe.”
“Did he kiss you at the end of the movie when she gets her kiss?” she asked.
“Oh, no. We made it about thirty minutes in before he made his move. Thanks for spoiling it for me, Kelly.”
“So, you’re getting this for him?” she asked.
“Yeah. Yeah, I am.” I smiled down at the movie as I took it to the counter. The cashier rang it up before he handed it back to me in a plastic bag, and all the memories from our first encounter came flooding back to my mind. The way his lips were so warm, and the way his touch was so electrifying. The way he was gentle pressing into me for the first time, and the way his tongue threw me over the edge. He cradled me closely to him, snapping his hips against mine while peppering my face with calming kisses.
I felt my skin pucker at the memory of all the sensations while we walked out of the store.
“You are so in love with Tyler,” Kelly said, smirking.
“Shut up,” I said.
“You might not want to admit it now because of the uproar your life is in, but trust me. I know that look. You totally love him,” she said.
I turned the reality over in my head as we ducked back into my car. Tyler’s present taunted me from the backseat as I took Kelly home, and she told me to come up to her apartment so I could get it wrapped quickly. She handed me a little gift bag with some tissue paper to cover it up, and all the while I couldn’t get her statement out of my head.
She was right. I was in love with Tyler.
Now, it was a matter of letting him know that.
“Thanks for your help today, Kelly,” I said.
“Anytime. Let me know how he likes he gift.”
“Oh, I will,” I said.
“And Amber?”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t wait too long. Moments are never going to be perfect. If you love him, tell him. That’s what will make the moment perfect. If you wait too long, you might risk losing him.” she said.
I turned her words over in my head as I headed back to my apartment, and yet again, she was right. I had to tell Tyler how I felt before he left. Before he convinced himself I didn’t feel the same way. Before he got too lost in his thoughts.
I had to tell him I loved him before I lost him for good.
Chapter 31
Tyler
I knew Amber was trying to make me feel better, however it wasn’t sitting right. I knew I would be able to talk some sense into Ron if he could put aside whatever anger he was holding against me and listen for a second. I had to figure out why he was angry. Why was he so against Amber and me? It no longer had to do with me supporting her dance business because he was on board as well. Maybe he didn’t like me, or maybe he was still trying to hold onto a semblance of control, but either way, I needed to talk with him. I wasn’t going to be the reason Amber and he had a strained relationship.
If I couldn’t talk some sense into him, then I’d have to leave. It was that simple.
I loved Amber too much for her to go through life without the support of her father. She thought it would be alright, but it would strain every family holiday. She would never get to enjoy the Thanksgivings or Christmases or birthdays the way she was used to. There would no longer be any random weekend get-togethers that didn’t end in an argument, and it would eventually get to a point where she wouldn’t want to go because of the stress. She wouldn’t want to be around her family for the holidays because she would get sick and tired of fighting, and it would be easier not to go. The damage I was trying to repair would be greater than ever if I stayed with her without her father’s permission.
So, I got up this morning and decided to text Luke. I told him I was going to come by his parents’ again, and I thought to have him and his mom there would help. Maybe if Ron saw two people who did approve of our relationship, it would cause him to see how he felt wasn’t warranted. Throughout all this, I never once disrespected him or his daughter. If anything, I came to her defense, which is something a father should admire.
And I figured that talking with him along with everyone else present would help.
I pulled into the Duffield’s driveway and saw Darlene and Luke waiting for me on the porch. They welcomed me with open arms before their faces got serious, and that’s when I knew.
Ron was expecting me.
“I support you, dude. I’m in your corner,” Luke said.
“I’ve never seen Ron be so stubborn before. Maybe we can get him to open up about what’s going on,” Darlene said.
“It means a lot to me that you are here. I care about Amber, and all I want to do is show him that,” I said.
“Amber’s lucky to have you. Dad just needs to get his head out of his ass,” Luke said.
“Sweetheart, language.”
“Sorry, Mom. But, it’s true. If there’s anyone that’s bred tension while we’ve been here, it’s been Dad. Not Tyler,” Luke said.
“You ready, honey?” Darlene asked.
“As ready as I’ll ever be.”
The three of us walked into the house, and Ron was sitting in the fireplace room with a book. He had a mug of coffee sitting on his thigh while his eyes scanned the page, and he paid us no mind as the three of us sat down. We all watched him while he read, his mug coming up to his mouth every once in a while. He looked so stoic like he was deep in thought about something, and I gathered myself one last time before I took a deep breath.
But, he cut me off before I could begin talking.
“You already know my answer,” he said.
“Ron, just listen,” Darlene said.
“No.”
“Dad quit being a dick about this,” Luke said.
“Approaching me with a rude attitude gets you nowhere, Luke,” he said.
“Mr. Duffield.”
“You are not dating my daughter,” he said.
“With all due respect, I’m already dating your daughter.”
That caught his attention. The book fell onto his lap, and he set the coffee mug on the table beside him. His glasses fell into the crook of his nose as his eyes slowly panned up to mine. He scanned my body, sizing me up while his head whirled with what to say. In that very moment, I was confident. I knew what I wanted to say to him, and I knew it probably wouldn’t do any good. I knew he would probably reject everything I had to say, no matter who was in my corner.
“I love your daughter, Mr. Duffield. She’s sassy and independent. She’s driven and vivacious. She’s incredibly beautiful and—”
“I’ll save you the time. You are not getting my blessing, you will never get my blessing, and if I have anything to do with it I’ll be convincing Amber you’re not right for her,” he said.
“You will be doing no such thing, Ron,” Darlene said.
“I won’t?” he asked.
“You pull this every time you feel life spiraling out of control. You’ve always had a plan for our lives, and every time it gets derailed you try to pull the ‘head of the household’ card. You try to take back your control and right the ship instead of understanding that you were never in control in the first place. Our children have never really been ours. We raised them the best we could, then we sent them out into the world,” Darlene said.
“Just because they are legal adults doesn’t mean we stop being parents,
sweetheart. When they are making a bad decision, we make sure they don’t make it,” he said.
“And yet, you almost forced Amber to make a stupid decision with her life based on your fear of lack of control,” Luke said.
“She broke a promise to this family, and she’ll have to live with the consequences,” Ron said.
“Enough with the consequences, Ron. You’re not some sort of executioner. The only person making the holidays unpleasant at this point is you,” Darlene said.
“So, now I’m a bad father because I don’t want my daughter dating a man with no family, no stable income, no life experience, and no positive dating history up until this point? I’m just supposed to hand her over to a man who walks around with a leather jacket on and picks fights with his business partner?” he asked.
“That argument was between Tyler and me,” Luke began, “and business partners argue all the time.”
“Well, have you resolved anything yet?” he asked.
“No, because we’re too busy trying to get you on board with what’s more important,” I said.
“And what’s that?” he asked.
“My being in love with your daughter and wanting to give her the world,” I said.
“You couldn’t even give her an apartment, much less the world. A relationship takes more than love, or whatever it is you claim to have. It’s more than wanting to spread your seed, Tyler. It takes dedication, and money, and stability. None of which you have or possess,” Ron said.
“Not true on any counts,” Darlene said. “The business for Luke and Tyler is booming, so much so that they’re opening a second location right here in LA. He’s dedicated to his company, which proves he can stay dedicated to something he truly loves, like our daughter. And he’s stable. He came from a family that didn’t care about him, and look at the man he’s become. A career-minded man who is business savvy and will be able to provide a great deal for Amber. Ron, we had less when we first met.”
“That was different. We weren’t in love with one another for a couple years after we met,” Ron said.
“I loved you from the moment you first kissed me.”
I watched Ron whip his head up to his wife, and I had enough sense to keep my mouth shut. Luke's eyes were darting between his parents while he tried to figure out what was going on, but I knew. They were silently communicating about something that had never been talked about. Ron was living in one interpretation of his relationship with his wife while Darlene was working off hers. The mere fact that they couldn’t agree on when they fell in love with one another gave me a glimpse into the reason why Ron was bucking so badly at this.
In Ron’s mind, it took them a long time to fall in love. With Darlene, however, it was almost instant.
“Tyler and Amber are good together, Dad. They support one another. He puts up with her crap without taking any of her bullcrap, and she keeps him in line. They really are two peas in a pod,” Luke said.
“Thanks,” I said.
“And I’ve seen the way Amber looks at him, Ron. It’s the way I used to look at you. The way I still look at you. Remember how my parents reacted when you stated your intentions to them? How much my mother couldn’t stand it?” Darlene asked.
“That was different,” Ron said.
“Because you didn’t wear a leather jacket or because you didn’t meet them until a year after we were dating?” she asked. “Tyler cares for our daughter. He cares about what happens to her, so much so that he’s been going around to everyone and convincing them how wrong they’ve been. He talked to Luke about how stupid the two of them were being, fighting over this. He came to me and showed me that how we treated Amber was wrong, which I knew from the beginning but I didn’t have enough courage to stand up and say it. Well, I’m standing up and saying it now: you’re wrong about the two of them. I support them fully, and I hope they stay together despite what you say. Had I listened to my parents, we would’ve never married, and look at what we’ve built. The family we’ve created. And you’re trying to hold onto it so tightly that you’re crushing it in the palm of your hand.”
I watched Darlene intently before my eyes panned back over to Ron. Honestly? I wouldn’t have been able to say it better myself. I knew when I needed to keep my mouth shut, and this was one of those times. Darlene’s eyes were boring into Ron’s, and I could tell he wasn’t happy. The frown was falling on his face, and his brow was furrowing deeper and deeper.
I thought I had a shot to change his mind until he slowly stood to his feet.
“So long as I’m alive, I will never approve of a man like Tyler being with Amber.”
In that moment, I felt the wind being ripped from my lungs. If his own wife couldn’t change his mind, then there was no way I would be able to. I sighed and hung my head while my mind began to whirl with all sorts of things, and one of the things that dawned on me was how close Christmas was.
And the lack of a gift I had for Amber.
“I’ve never been disappointed in you, Ron Duffield. Not in my entire life, until now. Congratulations. The man you didn’t want to ever turn into you just became.”
With that last sentiment, Darlene stormed off. Luke looked over at me and put his hand on my shoulder, then I stood to my feet and held out my hand to Ron.
“Thank you for your time, sir,” I said.
But, all he did was stare at my outstretched hand.
“A man who can’t even shake another man’s hand after a conversation has no business calling himself a man,” Luke said.
Ron whipped his gaze over to his son, glaring in his direction before Luke ushered me toward the door. The two of us walked out of the house, the door closing with a soft thud as I breathed in the cool, crisp LA winter air.
“I don’t have a gift for Amber yet,” I murmured.
“Then why don’t we go fix that. I think we could use a nice walk anyway,” Luke said.
“We should talk about what we’re doing with the business,” I said.
“We can do that over food or something. Right now, let’s focus on getting Amber something from you. You got anything in mind?”
Honestly? I didn’t. I’d been so wrapped up in this crusade that I hadn’t given it much thought. But, I figured if I walked around long enough it would come to me.
Just like she had come to me in college.
“Let’s get out of here,” Luke said.
“Yeah,” I sighed. “Let’s go.”
Chapter 32
Amber
“I don’t have to go, Amber. I know your family isn’t going to want me there.”
“I’m spending Christmas Eve with you, Tyler. If my father kicks up a stink, we’ll leave. We can go create our own traditions and memories for the holidays if that’s what happens,” I said.
“But, if you go without me, no stink will be risked, and you can spend Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with them the way I know you want to,” Tyler said.
“I’m not spending this holiday without you,” I said. “Now, come on. Let’s go.”
We climbed into Tyler’s rental car and headed to my parents’ house. It had taken days to convince Tyler to come along with me, but I was glad he was coming. I wanted to be with Tyler for a very long time, so Dad was simply going to have to get over whatever he was holding against him. Maybe the holidays would soften him, and he would see what he was doing and how irrational he was being. But if he wanted to kick up more drama, then he would reap the consequences of his actions.
Which would be not having his baby girl for Christmas.
“Amber, I’m really not sure this is a good idea.”
“Tyler, I want you for the holidays. That’s all I want. More than any present or any business or anything to do with my family. I want you. I want to try this. I want to try and make this a familial holiday like you set out to do. But, if I can’t, if this backfires, then I leave with you. Not because of you. Got it?”
I took his hand and brought it to my lips before I p
laced a small kiss on top of it. I could tell he was still hesitant about everything, but there was a little sparkle of happiness in his eye. I knew where he was coming from. He didn’t want to be the reason my family didn’t enjoy the holidays. But, what he had to understand was that no one was suffering because of him.
They were suffering because of my father.
“Oh! You made it! Oh, that’s so wonderful. We’re going caroling again this year.”
“Mom, we go caroling every year,” I said.