She didn't answer. Her blue eyes scanned his face for any signs that might give her a clue to herself, but there was nothing. “Who are you?” she asked cagily. She didn't recognise him. There'd been so many people in and out of her room—she remembered them as if from a dream—that she couldn't be sure.
“You can call me Eqin,” he said as if she should know him, but the name didn't ring any bells, and she curled up tighter, avoiding his eyes.
“I don't know you,” she said mistrusting.
“But I know you,” he said gently.
She jerked her head up. “You do?"
“Yes, I do."
She looked into his piercing green eyes. Could he hold the key to unlock her memory? “Who am I?"
“Your name is Cathy,” he said.
She didn't immediately respond. The name meant nothing. The woman at her bedside earlier had already told her, but it rang no bells. “Where am I?” she demanded, repeating the same questions she had asked the woman earlier.
He sat down on her bed, facing her. “We are at the Facility,” he said.
“Oh.” What facility was he talking about? It had to be some sort of mental institution. She knew enough to know she wasn't well, and it would make sense. “Why am I here?” she asked.
“You were very ill, and we brought you here trying to help you,” he answered quietly.
She looked at him puzzled, not sure what he meant. It was all so confusing. Her thoughts were muddled. She couldn't recall anything that would help her to make sense of what had happened. A sudden and uncontrollable fear gripped her.
“How long have I been here?” she whispered, struggling to maintain her composure.
“Just more than three months."
She was taken aback. “Three months?"
“Yes."
She tried to comprehend what he'd just told her, but it made little sense. Even the concept of time was difficult to understand. She knew that three months was a long time, but she had few recollections of that time. “I don't remember anything."
Suddenly part of the wall vanished. A man walked in. His gaze darted from her to her visitor. “It's time for your injection."
She went cold, and shrank away from him. There was something different about him. What was it? It took her a few seconds to realise what it was. She blurted out the words, “You're not human."
She noticed Eqin and the other exchanging a surprised glance, and she shrank into her seat.
Why are they so surprised? Am I not supposed to know that?
Suddenly she felt extremely lonely and exposed. Rocking back and forth in an effort to comfort herself, she whispered, “Stay away from me."
Her arms were tightly folded over her chest. She was scared out of her wits and had no idea how to control her fear.
The non-human moved towards her. “You need the injection to stay alive,” he tried to persuade her.
A memory flashed before her eyes—a memory that horrified and angered her at the same time. She remembered him restraining her, and saying something to her ... No, not saying, they were like ... thoughts ... and they weren't nice thoughts.
She held up her hands protectively. “No! Get away from me."
Eqin indicated with a movement of his hand for the assistant to leave the room. After hesitating a few moments the person left, apparently reluctantly. She looked at Eqin with a mixture of gratitude and distrust. Who was he? He obviously had to be important to order the assistant out with a simple gesture of his hand, but what did he want from her? Why is he keeping me here?
Once the assistant had left the room, Eqin turned to her. “It's alright, Cathy. He's gone now,” he said gently.
Although she didn't trust him, his tone was strangely reassuring. She was still sitting in the corner, trembling. “I remember him. He hurt me."
“You probably remember him restraining you,” Eqin said calmly.
Her blue eyes searched his face. She hadn't expected him to be so honest. “Restraining me? Why?"
He hesitated, seemingly searching for the right words. “When we brought you here you were very confused."
“Confused?"
What does he mean? I don't remember anything about being brought to this place.
“Alright, maybe that's not the most fitting description,” Eqin corrected himself. “You were very aggressive and disorientated. There were times when you were a danger to anyone who came into the room. You would attack them without warning."
She didn't know what to say. She sensed he was speaking the truth, but she had a hard time associating herself with what he'd said. Was she a violent person? She didn't think so, but she had to be. Why else would she attack other people? She had to admit she had a hard time keep her emotions in check. They seemed to have a life of their own, effervescing and taking control of her mind.
His eyes were full of concern, and she suddenly felt awkward. He was different to the others. The others treated her like some sort of ... experimental animal. He didn't. Why? What was she to him?
“Do you remember any of it?” he asked.
She shook her head. “No."
“Cathy, there's no other way to put this. You were suffering severe psychosis,” he said.
She shriveled under his gaze. She had a compelling notion he was expecting something from her, but she wasn't sure what it was. It was all so confusing.
As if sensing her turmoil, he explained, “It wasn't your fault, you know. You were injected with a nanovirus that destroyed large chunks of your genetic material. It almost killed you."
A memory stirred, but it didn't show its face. She was suddenly convinced he was only telling part of the story, and unexpectedly, a wave of hostility flooded over her. She glowered at him and huddled defensively in the corner. “You're hiding something from me. I don't trust you. I don't trust any of you ... people."
He seemed to be unperturbed. “There's no reason not to trust me. I'm telling you the truth."
She narrowed her eyes, and moved into a feline position, ready to attack. Her initial fear was replaced by an inexplicable rage.
“No. You must tell me the full story now. You owe me that,” she maintained.
When he refused to answer, the rage inside her took over, and she lunged at him, hands and fingers stretched out like claws.
He had to have expected it, because he caught her wrists in a metal-strong grip. Even through her fury, she could feel his physical strength as he forcibly brought her under control. As she was struggling to free herself from his grip, she felt something brush over her skin. Whatever it was had an instant reaction. The rage was gone as quickly as it had come and she felt his grip loosen. The last thing she saw was the concern etched on his face—and something stirred inside her. I know him ... But before she could pin down the memory, it was gone and she slipped into darkness again.
Eqin touched her face with his fingertips. Poor Cathy. Had he made the right decision to prevent her from dying? Over the past months, she'd displayed all the signs of insanity. Her rage was instantaneous and all-consuming. It would appear without any warning. S'Tha's treatment had put a stop to the nanovirus’ destruction, but the after-effects of the treatment were severe, and the damage to Cathy's own genetic material had been considerable. Her memory was gone, and so, it seemed, her personality and mental stability.
Maybe S'Tha had been right when she accused him of using Cathy as a guinea pig instead of allowing nature to take its course. But he simply couldn't let her go. He lifted her frail body onto the bed and covered her up before leaving the room.
Walking down the passage he bumped into S'Tha. One look at her face told him she was still not pleased about the human in their facility. He knew she felt that his affection for Cathy had weakened him, made him vulnerable. It was an opinion she shared with many of the others at the Facility. In their eyes, it compromised their scientific integrity and reputation.
How is she? S'Tha asked.
The treatment has taken so much
from her. Maybe you were right. Maybe we shouldn't have interfered. I've never seen anyone as traumatised as she. She's scared of everything, refuses to allow anyone to come close to her. I doubt that she'll ever be the same again. Eqin made the admission reluctantly, expecting her to agree.
Instead she answered evenly, You know she won't. The damage is irreversible, but what's done is done, Eqin. We did interfere and now we have a responsibility to make sure that she gets the best possible care.
Eqin narrowed his eyes. Her sudden change of heart took him somewhat by surprise. Just recently, she wanted Cathy gone, but now she wanted to give her the best possible care? What was she up to?
His unspoken question was soon answered, when S'Tha took him by the arm, Come, I want to show you something.
She guided him to her lab.
There, she motioned towards two crystal spheres, and they floated towards her. With a wave of her hand, two holograms appeared. Eqin immediately recognized them as images of the human brain. He'd seen the one before—it was Cathy's. With pain in his heart, he remembered the first time he saw it and realized the nanovirus had arrested large portions of her brain's activity. Even now, he had a hard time looking at it without feeling guilty for not letting her die.
S'Tha pointed to an area of the one hologram.
Look here. This area generates more activity than the normal human brain. Other areas also seem to have regained some of their activity, but we're not sure yet what it means.
You mean she may get her memory back? he asked, hopeful.
She threw him a sideward glance. I doubt that very much. That area has been inactive for a long time, which means that the cells will have died off. The human brain is very fragile.
He stared at the holograms. He couldn't place it, but something about Cathy's brain seemed out of the ordinary. He'd never studied human physiology, barring, of course, the bit necessary to successfully pretend to be a human, but he got the distinct impression that he was missing something. Funny. Surely, S'Tha would have noticed anything unusual.
Can you give me a copy of this one? He pointed at the hologram of Cathy's brain.
S'Tha looked at him questioningly before saying, Sure.
She took another crystal sphere, and held it next to the originals. There was a tiny flash of light and then she gave the new record to Eqin. Done. It'll be updated automatically for you.
He suspended the sphere in the air with a movement of his hand. As if attached to his energy field, the sphere followed him as he left the lab.
Walking back thoughtfully to his private quarters, he couldn't help but be disappointed that Cathy wouldn't be able to regain her memories. Without a past, she would never be a whole person again, which was something he wouldn't have wished one anyone. Not even Hasan.
In his quarters, he called up the hologram again. Studying it carefully, he could clearly see that electric activity had increased, even from a few minutes before. There was definitely something happening there, but he wasn't exactly sure what it was. With a wave of his hand, he disengaged the hologram, and motioned the sphere back to its suspended position with the others in his quarters.
It disturbed him to feel he was missing something. He very seldom missed anything, and in this case, he had a strong sense that it was important, that it would change his life.
* * *
Chapter 9
As time passed, S'Tha's prediction seemed to come true although the progress was slow. Cathy's body and mind had taken a considerable thrashing and she often struggled to control her emotional outbursts and frustrations. Adding to her dissatisfaction was the fact that she wasn't allowed outside the room. Although she couldn't complain about the facilities—she had access to a crystal display system from which she could access any broadcast in the world, as well as access any other entertainment she wished, with a simple wave of her hand—she felt trapped.
At first, she accepted her confinement, but as her mental and physical stability improved, she found it increasingly difficult to accept her situation. She remained aloof and skittish of every person entering her room, including Eqin, even though with him she experienced a different type of unease.
Eqin was difficult to read. Her intuition told her that, unlike the others, his concern was sincere and that there was little difference between his thoughts and his actions towards her. But she knew he wasn't honest with his own people and that he was hiding something from them. She wondered what it was.
She'd figured out a long time ago that they weren't human, and that she, on the other hand, was. She couldn't explain how she knew, but she did know she didn't trust any of them. It was as if she could read their hidden thoughts, and they often didn't correspond with their actions. It just didn't make any sense. How did she end up being the only human among a group of aliens? Where was she? She suspected they were still on Earth, but that was just too bizarre. A group of aliens living on Earth? That couldn't be right.
Then there were the flashbacks and hallucinations she suffered almost continuously. Hardly a day went by with her not experiencing some hallucination or recalling bits and pieces of her past. Because she wasn't sure whom she could trust, she didn't let on that her memory wasn't completely gone. Particularly not to S'Tha. She didn't know why, but she felt an increasing animosity towards the alien female. Anyway, most of her flashbacks and hallucinations were so blurred and disjointed she couldn't be sure if they were real at all.
As her strength improved, so did her need to explore. However, S'Tha had given strict orders that she wasn't to leave the room, and she was well aware of that. Still, it hardly prevented her from trying to leave the confinement.
She spent many hours trying to figure out how to work the strange doorway, but nothing she tried seemed to work. There were no handles or buttons to push. In fact, the openings seemed to appear in slightly different places each time. Others entering or leaving her room did so with ease, but whenever she tried, no doorway would appear. It didn't take a genius to figure out that it had something to do with their way of communicating—it was as if they commanded it through their thoughts. In some way, she reveled in the mental challenge. There was no way the aliens would keep her locked away in her room for ever. Time was on her side.
One day, as she was carefully studying the wall, an opening appeared again and an assistant walked in holding a few books. He stopped in his tracks when he saw her quietly standing on the opposite side of the room, and their gazes met.
“I brought you some books—you call them books, don't you?” he said, speaking as humans did.
She didn't respond. Her eyes never left his face as she stood motionless, barefoot and dressed in the white gown she'd been wearing since coming to the Facility. She could see the assistant shift around uneasily, and sensed his fear. It surprised her. Why is he scared of me? As she cocked her head, raising her hand, she noticed him retreat nervously. It amused her.
“Thanks. You can put them over there."
He put the books down in a hurry, obviously relieved about his being able to leave the room, and hurried out.
When he was gone, she looked at the tiny heap neatly placed on the table in the corner. She felt emotion stir inside her. Why did they even bother? What did it help to give her books to read when she was confined to a tiny room, which had no windows and no doors? She was their prisoner.
With an unexpected flare of anger, she picked up the books and threw them with all her might against the wall. But instead of hitting it and falling to the ground, the books simply melted into the wall, and then disappeared.
Stunned she looked at it. Her anger was gone as quickly as it had come. How was that possible? What was that wall made of? She couldn't see or hear beyond her room. The structure appeared to be as solid as brick. So how was it possible that the books would simply disappear?
Cathy walked closer and carefully touched the wall. It felt smooth and solid like stone, but clearly, it wasn't. It seemed to be made from a material unknown on
Earth, and was unlike anything she had encountered before.
Frustrated, she turned around and hit the wall with her fist, but it didn't budge. Slowly she slid down to the floor, and covered her face with her hands. She had to get out of there, but how? Then, out of the corner of her eye, she noticed that an area had become clear—there was an opening. She waited for someone to enter, but no-one came. It had opened for her. How? Who could have...
Cautiously she got up, not sure what to expect. Her innate paranoia prevented her from walking out instantly. Someone had to have opened the door. But why?
She moved out into the passage; her bare feet hardly making a noise on the smooth floor. The narrow passage was lit in a soft yellowish light. It curved only about three metres in each direction. Beyond that, there was simply nothing.
She hesitated, wondering which way to go—right or left? Both directions looked exactly the same, and after weighing up the options, she decided to go right. The passage came to a dead end. There were no exits.
Frowning, she turned around and after having walked about the same distance she'd walked previously, she stopped.
Where's the entry to my room?
She looked around nervously. No exits to be seen anywhere. Disturbed, she walked further down the passage, only to come to another dead end. She turned around, but the passage was suddenly less than a metre long. Trying to control the rising panic, she took a deep breath.
The passage is shrinking! Her heart raced. Stay calm!
From nowhere, muted footsteps approached and she looked around nervously, trying to control her breathing. There had to be a way out. If they found her there ... She'd hate to think what they would do to her. But there was no way out. She was trapped. It was as if the passage was closing her in, purposefully restricting her movement.
To her left the wall became clear and a man appeared, close enough for her to touch him. She instantly recognised him, and she drew in her breath waiting for his reaction.
He seemed more surprised than she was.
“Cathy, what are you doing out of your room?"
Alien Genes 1: Daughter of Atuk Page 13