“No, I long to see what poor Scamp will look like after her haircut."
“Do just as you please, Mr. Rushton."
It sounded very like he said, “I wouldn't dare,” but Selina could not be sure, as their horses were moving off, and the thuds of hooves and the jingling of the harness obscured his softly spoken words. Without acknowledging their waves, she stooped to pet the dog. “He is the most infuriating man, Scamp! Hold still now and I will try not to pull too much. And he laughs at me all the time. How would he like it if I laughed at him that way? Oh, I'd like to box his ears. Scamp, you must be patient. This will not take long. If he really wanted to be my friend, he would not be so provoking. Lie still, Scamp! How could you let him cozzen you with a few soft words?” Although the last was directed to the shaggy mutt, Selina thought ruefully that it applied to herself as well. “He is only charming when he wishes to be, and that is not nearly often enough. Well, we shan't worry about him, shall we? There, that will do until I get you home."
Scamp shook herself thankfully, unaware of her decidedly unattractive appearance. Tufts of hair were missing in a random pattern all over her body, and Selina shook her head doubtfully. “McDonough will not approve of you, you know. I'll have to cut it all back to a decent length.” Faced now with the problem of mounting her horse, Selina groaned. “Not for the world would I admit that he was right, so you had best cooperate with me, Scamp. I will not arrive at the stables carrying you and leading Starlight."
The chestnut mare patiently allowed her mistress to lead her to a stump, and she did not move, other than a wild flickering of her ears, during the whole procedure which followed. First, Selina attempted to place Scamp on the saddle, but the frightened dog would not stay there, possibly could not stay there, but slid off to the ground. After trying this several times, Scamp became annoyed with her precipitate journeys and glared at Selina menacingly. “You could not have glowered in that manner at Mr. Rushton, could you?” she asked with asperity. “Oh, no, you had to fawn all over him. Very well, we'll try something else."
Her second maneuver was no more successful than her first. Although she managed to get herself on the sidesaddle, Scamp would not jump onto the stump so that Selina could reach her. No amount of cajolery had any effect. Selina was beginning to lose her temper.
Driven by the desire to prove she had not overestimated her resourcefulness, Selina once again returned to the ground and picked up the dog, tucking the ball of fluff under her arm. "You are not going to like this, Scamp, but if you bite me I promise I shall allow you to wander about the house just as scraggly as you are!” After two unsuccessful attempts to seat herself on the horse, she lost her temper and threw a stone with all her might against a hapless tree. The third time she was triumphant. Scamp did not in fact bite her, merely clawed her in a frantic effort to get away. Selina surveyed the ugly red welt on her wrist and decided, “It is better than proving Mr. Rushton right."
For the first time it occurred to her that she would have done better to mount her horse on the road side of the fence, and she almost cried with frustration when she thought of the fences she would have to jump with Scamp in her arms. Only one, really, she considered, if she jumped into the road instead of going across country. Surely she could manage one jump with the dog. “It's like flying,” she assured Scamp as she set Starlight at the fence.
Whether or not Scamp agreed that it was like flying was immaterial. She had never been on a horse before, of course, and did not like the experience at all. Selina had her hands full simply keeping the dog from scrambling out of her lap. When they touched ground in the road, Starlight continued her lengthy stride for the two-mile run home, while Selina occupied herself with calming the dog. The Shalbrook gates were open, but not the fence to the stable area. Tried beyond endurance, Selina could only think that she daren't get down to open the fence because of the dog; it never occurred to her that they were quite close enough that the dog could walk the rest of the way home, even in her tattered condition. So Selina put her heels to her mare and they jumped the fence, to the astonishment of the stable-hands, and the incredulous admiration of Mr. Rushton, who had moved to a window on hearing the hoofbeats approaching.
“My God, what a seat!” he exclaimed to Henry.
“Glorious, ain't it?” the young man replied proudly. “How I should have liked to see Selina hunt. A pity she has given it up."
“More than a pity, a crime. And with the damn dog in her arms, no less!"
“Poor Scamp. She ain't at all fond of horses at the best of times,” Henry admitted.
“It doesn't seem to have done her any harm,” Rushton commented laconically as he watched the frisking Scamp follow her mistress from the stable-yard. Selina's color was high, her hair blown unkempt by the ride and her eyes bright from the merciless wind. Rushton had never seen her look more enchanting. It is perhaps fortunate that Selina did not see him at the window, for in her present state of mind she would very likely have stuck her tongue out at him.
Selina took the dog to be bathed and her scratches attended to, then dried her in the library before the fire, after which she sat down and patiently attempted to even out the shaggy coat. Standing back to view her handiwork, hands on hips, she said, “You are undoubtedly the scruffiest thing I've ever seen. No more hunting for you, little one."
“She wasn't any good at it, anyhow,” Henry announced cheerfully as he stuck his head around the door. “May we come in?"
“Just once I would like to be dressed properly when you bring me your guests,” Selina complained in a voice that would have moved a stone to pity.
“She's being dramatic again,” Henry explained to Rushton as the latter followed him into the room. “I've told her she is missing her chance for a fine career on the stage, but she pays me no mind."
“And why should I?” she asked, picking the dog's hairs from her dress. “A mere lad of sixteen who wouldn't know Shakespeare from Sheridan? And would probably find the latter more to his taste."
“Dr. Davenport has had me read half a dozen of Shakespeare's plays, and you know it,” Henry retorted.
Selina sniffed. “Read them! Ha! That makes you an authority on the theater, I take it. Ask Mr. Rushton. Though he, too, is probably more familiar with Sheridan than Shakespeare. Not that I object to Sheridan. Far from it. I can laugh at the absurdities of life as well as the next,” she proclaimed, eying Mr. Rushton balefully.
“So I perceive,” he said evenly, though his shoulders shook suspiciously.
Pursuing her grande dame attitude, Selina waved them to seats, declaring imperiously, “I shall ring for tea."
“Not on my account, I beg you,” Rushton protested. “I came only to see how Scamp has fared."
“I shall ring for tea!” Selina repeated, in a slightly louder voice.
“Well, for God's sake, do it, then,” Henry advised her, saying aside to Rushton, “When she's in one of these moods, there's no gainsaying her."
“Do they come over her often?” he asked curiously.
“I think mostly when she's had a trying day. She often becomes exceedingly dramatic just after one of your visits,” Henry said thoughtfully.
“I see. Usually she waits until I've left?"
“Yes, but perhaps today was especially trying for her."
“I don't doubt it."
Pointedly ignoring their dialogue, Selina swept over to the bellpull where she gave a violent tug. Returning with equal grace, she seated herself opposite Mr. Rushton and asked politely, “Have you had an enjoyable afternoon at your pugilistic activities?"
“Yes, the instruction went very well."
With a sweet smile, she turned next to Henry. “And you, my dear cousin, did you find boxing as much to your taste as you expected?"
“Dammit, Selina, we're not at a tea party. It was famous! I hadn't the least trouble with my limp. That's to say, only once or twice, and I shall easily overcome that."
His cousin nodded wisely. “The
re is nothing so rewarding as acquiring new skills. I note that you have survived this first session with no sign of damage to your person, Henry, and I congratulate you.” She turned again to Rushton. “Now then, sir, I wonder if you think this fine weather will hold."
“My lack of knowledge of the spring climate in Leicestershire unfortunately prevents me from predicting with any certainty, Miss Easterly-Cummings, but it would certainly be a delightful prospect."
Henry said disgustedly, “If you both intend to carry on this way, I shan't stay for tea."
“What is that, dear? No tea?” Selina gasped. “You must keep up your strength, dear Henry. Think of the exertion you have just undergone! Think of how long it is until we dine! Think of the horror Lord Leyburn would experience should such a piece of information come to his ears! Think..."
Abruptly, Henry rose to his feet. “Stop it, Selina. You are embarrassing me.” And then he stomped from the room.
The two who remained did not speak, or even look at one another. Rushton brushed an invisible speck of lint from his jacket. Selina gazed dumbfounded at the closed door for a moment, and then burst into tears.
“An especially trying day,” Rushton murmured as he rose and went to Selina's side, thrusting a handkerchief into her hand. “Don't be upset on my account. I promise you I was thoroughly enjoying your performance.” He waved away the footman who entered bearing the tea tray.
Too many times in the last few weeks Selina had repressed her tears. Too many emotionally charged events had overset her and yet gone unrewarded by the soothing balm of releasing those salty wet wonders. This time she made no effort to do so. It did not matter that Mr. Rushton was in the room with her; it would not have mattered if the whole village of Barton had been there. She cried until her body shook and Rushton pressed her head against his leg where he stood beside her, gently stroking her hair. She cried for a very long time, and when no more tears flowed she drew in gasping, hiccoughing breaths of air.
Scamp had awakened from the nap she was taking by the fire and came to thrust her muzzle between Selina's feet, looking sadly up at her mistress as though she sympathized, but Selina did not notice her. Once the storm had abated, Selina had become excruciatingly aware of Rushton's hand on her hair, and her head against his leg. There were tearstains on his buckskin breeches in spite of her use of his handkerchief. She could not force herself to sit back or get up; either way she would have to face him, and that she could not do.
As she had grown calmer, Rushton realized by the awkward angle of her head that she was no longer unaware of his presence. Placing both hands on her shoulders, he gently pushed her back on her chair and moved to stand behind it, his hands returning to her shoulders. “I had forgotten how difficult boys can be, Miss Easterly-Cummings. You have my sympathy. And yet I can remember that agonizing stage where my parents embarrassed me by almost everything they did when we were in company. I had my own ideas of how one should act. Everyone should act as I did! Boys outgrow it, and learn to accommodate a wide variety of acceptable behavior.” He laughed. “You probably don't believe that even today I accept a wide variety of behavior, but I assure you I do. There is no one socially acceptable way to act. We would be a sorry society if there were. As I said before, I was thoroughly enjoying your acting. Stay here, and I will have your maid sent to you."
Unable to speak, Selina bowed her head and listened to his footsteps recede across the room and finally proceed down the hall.
Chapter 15
McDonough, on hearing the footsteps in the hall, hurried down the passage on the other side of the stairs to intercept Mr. Rushton. “Will you be leaving, sir?"
“Not yet. Would you have Miss Easterly-Cummings’ maid sent to her in the library?"
It seemed to McDonough that his mistress had recently had a great deal more need for her maid than she had in many years, but he merely said, “Certainly, sir."
“Do you know where Forrester is?"
“I believe he went up to his room."
“Have him sent for. I wish to see him in the study— immediately."
In spite of the fact that Rushton had not the least say at Shalbrook, which no one knew better than McDonough, the butler indicated no hesitancy. “Very good, sir."
“Thank you.” With a nod, Rushton turned and strolled off to the study, the quiet murmur of voices behind reassuring him that his instructions were being carried out.
Quaking inwardly, Henry presented himself at the study door within five minutes. He had lived at Shalbrook for five years, and was not in the habit of knocking on doors, perhaps unfortunately, but he did not care to enter before doing so this time. He entered at Rushton's summons and attempted not to show his nervousness, but his cravat felt suddenly far too tight and he was forced to ease it by tugging it away from his throat. “You sent for me, sir?"
No answer was forthcoming. Rushton merely raked him with his eyes until Henry flushed with embarrassment and something akin to despair. “I ... I..."
Henry wished desperately that Rushton would suggest that he seat himself, but no such relief was offered. “Did I upset Selina?"
“Naturally."
“Well, she was upsetting me,” Henry managed with a touch of bravado.
“You don't say. She was not upsetting me."
“How can you say that?” Henry blurted. There she was, acting as though she were on the stage at Drury Lane! In our library!"
"Her library, Forrester."
A wave of pain passed over Henry's face. “I know it's her house, but she chooses to have me treat it as my own. She has told me so any number of times."
Rushton pursed his lips grimly. “And you feel it necessary to take advantage of her goodness?"
“I don't! She's my cousin, and I love her dearly. You have no idea how much she's done for me."
“I think I do. More, perhaps, than a young gudgeon like you can comprehend, Forrester."
Henry shifted awkwardly from one leg to the other. “I didn't want her to make a fool of herself in front of you."
“What you need to learn, my boy, is that she has every right to make a fool of herself if she wishes to. And you have no right to set yourself up as her censor. If she puts you through agonies of embarrassment, you will sit and take it like a man, not snivel about your discomfort. You cannot truly believe that you added to the pleasure of our afternoon by the scene you created. The two major qualities of a gentleman are acting honorably and courteously. You did neither."
The stinging words lashed Henry as nothing else could have. His shoulders slumped dejectedly and he hung his head. “I'm sorry. I never thought..."
“The trouble with youngsters is that they never do think, beyond their own wishes. You are not alone, Forrester, but that does not make your behavior any less reprehensible. In her concern for you, your cousin has allowed you more license than you should have. She has allowed your friendship to dull her authority over you. Her position is not enviable. Imposing the discipline which you should have would of necessity change your relationship, and she is far too young to realize that the benefits would outweigh the disadvantages ... for you. And until recently it has not been necessary, I take it. Don't make it necessary in future, Forrester,” Rushton said grimly, “or I shall have something to say about it."
“Yes, sir.” Henry rubbed his temples and looked miserable. “I will apologize to Selina, of course. Honestly, I don't mean to hurt her, and sometimes I even know that she's right, but ... Perhaps it is selfishness. But I'm not a child anymore, and I want to have some say in my life. Everyone is always telling me what I should do, and no one is asking me what I want to do. Selina tries to understand."
“Then see that you try to understand her. She has sacrificed a great deal to have the right to keep you with her, because she thought it would be best for you, and she was undoubtedly right. You may chafe under her protectiveness, and regret that she doesn't share your newly-discovered dream of independence, but she has devoted her life to
raising you, and you cannot shrug aside the obligation that lays on you.” Rushton crossed the short distance between them and laid his hand on Henry's drooping shoulders. “Don't think I don't sympathize with you, too. From sixteen to eighteen I was in a turmoil I shudder to remember. You can't make it an excuse for gauche conduct, though, as my father used to impress on me."
Rushton removed his hand and wandered thoughtfully to the window. “Do you resent my talking to you this way?"
Startled, Henry gulped, “No."
“You probably should,” Rushton retorted smiling. “It is, after all, none of my concern. But I hope you will heed my advice; it is well-intentioned.” He remembered Miss Easterly-Cummings’ pungent remark on her good intentions, and shrugged his broad shoulders. “I will be back in a few days for our next boxing lesson, if you wish."
“You will? But...” Henry could not express the fear that he had so disgusted Rushton by his conduct that he would never see the man again.
“You and your cousin don't seem to understand my own supreme belief in my consequence,” Rushton said querulously. “One word from me is supposed to so sufficiently dash your pretentions that it is not necessary for me to further annihilate you by word or deed. You do wish to continue boxing, don't you?"
“Yes, sir."
“Then I shall return in a few days."
Henry learned from Selina's maid that his cousin was in her room lying down. When she did not appear for dinner, he felt mortified and wretched with guilt. Rushton had not said how very upset Selina was, but Henry was beginning to draw an accurate conclusion. After his meal he sent a note up to her that said simply: Please forgive me. May I see you?
The slip of paper fell from Selina's hand after she read it. Of course she would have to see him, but she felt so exhausted, too spent to have another emotional scene. Tomorrow she would perhaps feel more like thinking about the problem, deciding whether she would do best to send him to his guardian. She flinched at the very thought, but considered it a real possibility. Where she had lost control over this burgeoning young man, Lord Leyburn, for all his coldness, might have more success. He was a man, and likely to better understand a boy of Henry's age than she. Such a solution appalled her, but tomorrow she might be able to look at the situation from Henry's point of view, or at least from what she considered to be best for Henry.
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