Gunner
Emma stole my breath. I missed her so much. Her beautiful, dark locks pulled tight in a ponytail, showing off her long neck that I craved to taste again. Her eyes stayed on Colton and Logan, so she did not see me walk in. But I could not take my eyes off of her.
Absolute perfection.
Emma swayed slightly in her seat, telling me she had a little too much to drink. I could not hide my smile if I tried. It was so good to see her.
“What do you want Gunner?” Dylan was less than happy to see me and I could not blame her. I had no idea what I was walking into right now, but I hoped against hope that we could just pick up where we left off. Baton Rouge was miserable as always and I was just so happy to be standing in this house, looking at MY woman.
“Just to see her,” I answered. And that was the God’s honest truth. Tonight was the anniversary of Tru’s death and how could I not be here for her. No matter what happened between us or the dreaded two months I was away, she and the boys were the most important things to me and I could not stand the thought of her being in pain or alone on such a hard day.
“You saw her, so you should probably leave.” Dylan - the hard ass. I liked it. It made me happy to know that people were looking out for Emma even if she did not want the help or the eyes on her.
“It’s not that simple.” My eyes were still on Emma, seeing the longing in them as she watched Colton hold Logan.
“It never is. Gunner, I’m serious. Seeing you is going to mess her up and she is already all over the place this week.”
“I promise . . .” My voice trailed off, because what could I promise. I was not there to hurt her and leaving would do just that, but I was just too damn selfish to stay away. I needed her more than she needed me anyway. I literally rode all day to get to her and I would have to leave in another day or two to get back.
“Exactly. You got nothing promising and nothing to promise. Please. Go.”
“I can’t.” And I couldn’t. Not when I was this close and just like that the wind was knocked out of me when Emma’s eyes collided with mine.
She shook her head, then rubbed her eyes as if I was a mirage. I took a big step and then another as she tried to reconcile what she saw with the fact that I had been missing in action these last two months. It was time to come clean. I could see the pain I had put her through. Another step had her within an arm’s length.
“No. No. No,” yelled Emma, louder and louder each time. “Whaaat the fuuuck you doin’ here?” Emma was pissed and she had every right to be. I took another step to her. I knew it was time to own up to whatever this was. It was time to . . . catch her.
CHAPTER SIX
Emma
“Just tell me Tru,” I saw myself scream into the phone. My hair was a tangled, greasy mess as I tried to rake my fingers through it.
“Oh shit.” My double paced back and forth. I knew Tru’s voice would be winded from running. I also knew the minute Tru told my former self that the Night Demons were here, and the realization that our boys were in danger. Just like that night I got lost to the images of someone hurting Max and Mase.
“Ok,” My image said again. “I will hide the boys and get everyone armed in here.” The call ended as I followed myself looking around the room and knew where I would end up. The Reed sisters!
Anger and fear warred within me just like that night. Helplessness and hopelessness welled up; because I knew nothing would change what I knew was coming. They looked as shocked and terror-filled as I felt.
God, we were stupid. We had all thought we were safe here. Untouchable as long as a Reaper guarded the front gate and a brother with a gun had the back. But we were wrong. So very wrong!
I knew when my former self came to the same conclusion as I did. It was time to get something right. We both looked straight at Campbell. “We need to wake everyone up NOW,” I heard myself command.
“Why?” Cam stammered as Logan began to question what was going on.
“Listen to me,” Past Emma demanded. “The Night Demons are here!” That got their attention.
“Yes. As in outside our gates. Someone tipped them off that the majority of our Reapers left, so they came here.” There was a long pause as everyone came to terms with this news. I looked around the room like I did every time I had this dream to see if I could have done something different, seen something different. “Logan, go wake everyone up right now. Cam get the gun cabinet open. Dylan, start barricading the door. I am going to go hide my boys and be back.”
Past Emma darted up the steps with me on her heels. Just like that night excuse after excuse raced through my mind as I tried to find a reasonable explanation to give the boys and nothing stuck. “No more excuses,” I yelled at Past Emma.
“Mase, Max. Babies I need you to wake up.” The shake in former self’s voice made goose bumps run up and down my arms. Tears filled both of our eyes. I wanted nothing more than to shelter all of us from this horrible night, but the Demons were knocking whether we were ready or not.
“Wakey wakey.” I hated this part.
“No, no momma. Too tired,” complained Mason as he rolled away.
“It’s still dwark out.” Maxon rightfully observed before turning towards his brother. I laughed to myself as he fed me the same lines I used on them when they woke me up before the sun rose.
“I know babies, but momma needs you to be safe right now and that means getting up.” The rapid repeat of gunfire had both boys up and in the arms of past Emma. I knew her heart was trying to pound out of her chest. I knew her palms were sweaty and her breath too fast to catch.
“What was that?” exclaimed Mason, as Maxon buried himself into her.
“That was daddy trying to protect us. There are bad men outside and he is trying to scare them away.”
“Why?” Maxon’s words a mumble against her chest. I rubbed my chest where I could still feel his words.
“I don’t know baby. Sometimes bad men do bad things.” I mouthed with her.
“Is daddy going to stop them?” It was Mason’s turn to try and hide himself.
“I hope so little man. I hope so.”
“Emma.” I turned to find Amber, strong but scared at the door. I was needed downstairs, but the hardest part was yet to come.
“Please come in.” Past Emma’s voice wavered again. My tears chocked mine.
“Here boys. Come with Auntie.” In unison, they said no as their little fists tightened around my double. The tears I had been fighting won the battle as they raced down my cheeks. “It’s going to be okay sis,” Amber reassured her . . . me. God, I wish she were right.
“How do you know?” I turned away from the scene as Amber continued to reassure her. Nothing she said mattered now.
“Ok,” I heard the conviction in my former self. The boys’ voices rose loud in protest, causing me to turn to find them clinging.
“Mommy, don’t go,” they begged. “Please stay here.” It broke my heart hearing their pleas, and knowing I was causing them.
“We’ll be good, we promise.”
“Please momma.”
“I know babies. I love you.” We both choked on our tears. “I love you both so much. Everything is going to be okay. I love you.” It took every ounce of strength we both had to get up and walk away from their pleading cries. The door closed as an ugly sob escaped. “Oh God,” we both cried as I buried my head in my hands.
A scratchy voice from years of smoking, echoed through the hallway. “I got the door pretty girl,” Stella assured us. “Amber has the boys and she’s carrying. So nothing and I mean nothing is getting to our boys. You got me?”
“Yes ma’am.” she hiccupped.
“You’re one of the strongest women I know Emma Rose. You be that woman right now. I know we will make it out of this. All of us.” Her words hit their mark as past Emma straightened her shoulders and wiped her tears. I knew what she was feeling, because I was feeling it too even though I knew the bloody outcome.
I woke up screaming just like I did every time. Gasping for breath as sweat ran down my face. The darkness of the room only added to the uncertainty of where I was and what was happening around me. Image after image of Tru, bloody and dead flashed before my eyes; of me trying and failing to save him. I screamed until my voice went hoarse, my lungs wheezed in protest, and blackness danced across my vision.
“Why, God, why?” I screamed into the night.
“Shhh cher. Shhh. I got you Emma. I’m here.” Arms tightened around my body as I felt the presence of Gunner by my side. “It’s ok, cher. I got you. Shhh.”
“Gunner?” How? Why? The questions became muddled as his warmth began to seep into my bones. I felt myself melting into his embrace as he rocked me back and forth. I did not even feel him next to me until he spoke, breaking through my nightmare, pulling me out of it.
“Fais do-do,” Gunner soothed as he sat back against the headboard and pulled me against his bare chest. I wanted to ask him what that meant, but sleep was already pulling me under. Without any thought, my fingers crawled across his stomach until my arm found its way around his waist, securing myself to him. I knew I needed to be angry. I knew I needed to fight with him, but right now his warmth was too welcoming, his words too reassuring, his presence too perfect.
The pressure of his absence was gone, allowing me to take a full breath, which only drew him deeper into me. His leather and smoky smell permeated every cell in my body. It smelled like a place I never wanted to leave, where I felt safe and happy . . . home.
“Gun,” I tried, but he interrupted me.
“Shhh cher. Sleep. I will be here when you wake up. I promise.”
“Please.” I wanted, no needed more, but sleep had other ideas for me as my mind followed my body and melted into him.
Gunner
Emma was a mess. Even with the warning from Dylan, I did not think it would be this bad. I could still feel her heart racing as she settled down next to me. Her breathing evened out, but her heart still battled within as if it was trying to break out. Free itself from the pain that was happening on the inside. The walls I built around myself in Baton Rouge came crashing down as I watched this perfect woman sleep in my arms.
My father and his talks of legacy and rightful place were shit compared to what this woman offered me without even trying. Emma was everything good in this life and I was tired of staying away. It was time to make her mine.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Emma
I was dreaming. It started out as a nightmare, but turned into a daydream of the man who invaded my every thought. I knew Gunner surrounded me before I even opened my eyes. The heady scent of his presence hit me first. How did he always smell smoky? Not the cigarette or wood-burning type of smoke, but more like a freshly fired gun, outdoorsy and aromatic. It was all Gunner mixed with the leather scent from his cut that lingered long after he took it off that created the complete package. I took another deep breath savoring it as my body began to recognize every warm, delectable inch of him that was pressed up against me. Two months of dreaming of what he felt like the next morning did nothing to prepare me for the tidal wave of desire his nearness unleashed.
But then ever so slowly the questions began like they always did. Where was Gunner for the last two months? Was there someone else? Why hadn’t he called? What do I tell my boys? I thought of all the nights I had to explain to them why another man was not here for them and it broke my heart remembering their disappointed faces. Thankfully their nightmares finally stopped from the attack on the clubhouse, but they still asked for Tru and Gunner. So how could I allow this man back into my home, my bed?
The boys were due home at lunchtime and I needed to get myself together. I had to untangle myself from the web of limbs he expertly spun overnight and free myself of him. Even if the pressure of his absence was gone, the weight of his presence was too heavy for me to bear.
Slowly as to not wake Gunner, I started to move my legs only to feel his clamp down on mine with his arms tightening around me.
“Not yet.” My body reacted on its own to that gruff, but sexy voice that rasped in my ear. “I need this for a little bit longer.”
HE NEEDED! Are you fucking kidding me right now?
He needed this! But what about what I needed? Budding desire was quickly replaced with mounting anger at him . . . at myself if I was being truly honest. Why was I not strong enough last night to push him from my bed? My blood boiled that I let my heart and body want him so badly that it threw my self-preservation right out the window.
Well, enough was enough!
Taking a deep breath, I let it out slowly as I pushed against his arms. Gunner tensed, but when I did not relent he released his hold on me, allowing me to get up and out of bed. Not meeting his eyes, I murmured, “I just need a minute,” as I escaped into my bathroom. After closing the door, I leaned on the counter and just stared at myself in the mirror.
Where was Gunner for the last two months? Was there someone else? Why hadn’t he called?
Those same questions flooded my mind, invading my thoughts like they did so many times before. Never finding an answer in my weary reflection, I dropped my head and closed my eyes.
I was so lost in thought I did not hear Gunner enter the bathroom until I felt his warmth against my back. “58 Mississippi, 59 Mississippi,” he murmured. His breath bathed the back of my neck. “One minute. Time’s up.”
“Gunner.” My voice a plea against what I knew he was asking from me. I had nothing left to give this man. He had taken it all the night of Logan’s wedding and gave nothing back.
“Je t’adore.” Gunner paused, placing a soft kiss on the back of my neck as he placed his hands on my shoulders. Our eyes met in the mirror as he whispered, “Je vous veux.”
Closing my eyes, I shook my head trying to clear the desire that welled up whenever he was near. “Yes,” he growled and spun me around. “Cher, look at me,” he demanded. Before I even opened my eyes, I could feel the frustration rolling off him in waves. His heavy breathing in and out of his nose was the only sound in the room as my eyes met his. Anger and hurt blazed the brightest blue. “I want you.” He stated as if that would change anything.
“Oh well,” I countered. “It’s not always about what you want Gunner.”
“You are the only thing I want. Past. Present. And future. You!” When he saw his words had no effect on me, he roared, “Emma Rose please. You are the only thing I have ever wanted for myself.”
“What does that even mean?” I yelled at him as I shrugged his hands off of me. “You can’t just waltz back in here and expect things to pick up where they left off. It doesn’t work that way. Time has moved on. I have moved on.” I threw the last words at him hoping to hurt him as much as his radio silence and absence had hurt me.
“Liar.” His eyes burned with intensity as he called my bluff.
“What the fuck did you just say to me?” I was irate!
“You’re lying. I can see it in your beautiful face. Don’t ever play poker,” he said as he stared back at me.
“This isn’t a joke Gunner.”
“I’m not joking Emma.” It was when he crossed his arms that I realized he was completely naked. My eyes practically fell out of my head as I took in his wide shoulders and sculpted arms. My eyes wandered over every muscle down his chest to his narrow waist. The perfect V held my attention long enough that Gunner had to clear his throat to get my eyes back to his.
“I can’t talk to you like this,” I stammered as I turned back to the mirror. My cheeks stained red.
“I didn’t come in here to talk,” he answered back.
“I . . . I.” Gunner did not let me finish as he pressed his body against me, pinning me to the counter. My body was rigid against his, refusing to yield.
“I didn’t come here to fight. I came to show you how much I missed you. How you are every thought I have, every
fantasy I dream, and every thing that I want.”
“Gun,” I sighed. His warmth seeped into my bones.
“Je vous veux.” As if reading my mind, Gunner breathed, “I want you,” in my ear.
And just like that I felt myself give in as I melted into him. Where was the anger? The hurt? The pissed off Emma that was here just a moment ago? With just a few words in a sexy accent, that Emma was missing and in her place was the wanton woman who knew how good Gunner could make her feel if she just turned around. Now in his arms, I was reminded of how I felt him days after he left. How he ravaged my body while I screamed for more. And I wanted more. Nothing else mattered right now. The objections that my mind should have been screaming were silent as my brain turned off and my body took over.
Right here, right now, I was willing to accept the pain of tomorrow for the pleasure of today. His shallow breathing told me he was as worked up as I was. I felt lost yet found, broken yet perfectly pieced together as I turned around in Gunner’s arms and his lips met mine.
How could lips feel so familiar yet only have ever touched mine one other time? How could kissing a man feel like coming home?
CHAPTER EIGHT
Gunner
Emma.
Silence was key as I opened the door and saw Emma with her head down leaning over the counter. She was beautiful. Dressed in nothing but my t-shirt made her perfect! And I wanted her more than my next breath of air. I was so addicted to her. Hell, Travis could have the gavel if it meant I could have this woman. My father be damned!
Nothing came close to how this woman made me feel. How could I have stayed away for two whole months? What could my father have ever said to keep me away?
Duty! Responsibility! Now it all just seemed like a noose around my neck. I was half the man I needed to be for the club and for her. I was being pulled in two different directions with no relief in sight.
Emma's Reaper: Soul Reapers #4 Page 3