by Cecilia Lane
“Would have been harder without you there, Tommy said.” The hand holding her hair tightened and tugged her head to the side. Warm breath bathed her neck before he licked a line to her ear.
Everly inhaled shakily. Her mind seemed to expand as her world narrowed down to the feeling of the man behind her. She wanted to twist around and wrap herself around him almost as badly as she wanted to see what he had planned for her.
At least she wasn’t the only one inches from giving in to those urges. With a growl, he released her hair and pulled her hips hard against him. A groan rolled out of her at the feel of him hard against her backside.
“I’ve been thinking about you all damn day. Wanting to taste you. Feel you. Give you the love you deserve.”
It begged the question of what they were to each other. Husband and wife? Friends with some sexy, marriage of convenience benefits? She didn’t object when he tucked her into bed the night before and her body certainly didn’t complain about his hands on her at that moment.
Questions for later. Right then, with a purr bubbling out of her throat, she hooked an arm over his neck and pressed closer. Almost immediately, he wrapped his fingers around her throat. He loved feeling her purr.
“And what,” she gasped when his teeth scraped against her shoulder, “do I deserve?”
He walked her forward until her thighs pressed against the table. “Everything.”
Her purr grew louder, vibrated harder. Sawyer’s fingers tightened for a tiny second before he spun her around and lifted her to the tabletop. His hands were everywhere, while his lips crashed over hers with a force that she matched stroke for stroke.
The distant ringing in her ears, the uneven beat of her heart, an unquenchable thirst, all of that faded with her hands running up and down his chest. Heat circled in her core with each unsteady buck of his hips against hers.
“Yes,” she panted. She dug her hands into his hair just to ground herself in that moment. “I want everything you’ll give me.”
And then her phone rang.
Everly dug it out of her pocket with a curse, intending to shut off the noise and fling it across the room. Then she caught sight of the number and all the heat flaring inside her chilled.
“I should take this,” she mumbled.
“Leave it.” He tried to convince her with a nip against her skin.
“It could be one of my patients.” She twisted out of his arms and grabbed hold of the phone. She was halfway into the bedroom before she glanced back to find him staring at her with a cocked eyebrow. She flashed him a sheepish smile as she shut the door behind her. “Hello?”
“Everly?” Emery sucked in a breath and whispered into her end. “Everly, you can’t leave me here alone.”
What followed was an unintelligible and hushed sob. Everly’s heart broke to hear her sister crying. It took several long minutes before she could comfort and quiet her sister into speech.
“They say you’re banished. I can’t even say your name without everyone piling on. Fix it, Everly,” Em pleaded.
She tried. By the Broken, she tried. She wished she had someone like the Oracle to whisper instructions in her ears and tell her how to direct her life. Even bad advice would be better than the wondering and guessing. “I can’t go back, Em. Not after everything.”
“So you’ll just forget about us then? We’re nothing to you?”
“That’s not what I’m saying at all! I love you. I just can’t live like that anymore, always wondering what I’ll say next and who will pop me for it.”
“I can’t lose you.” Emery’s voice quivered. “You’re the only person that keeps me sane.”
“Then leave. Come here. We can find something for you to do. You can live however you want.”
Em was quiet for long enough that Everly checked to make sure they were still connected. She chewed on her lip and silently begged the universe to give her this win. She wanted Emery to be well and find her laugh. They would have a bond like Faith and Becca, meet up for lunch, gossip, and care for one another without looking over their shoulders for the next fight.
Em’s whisper crushed those dreams. “You’d have me leave my mate?”
Everly shut her eyes and slid to the floor. “I’d have you safe and happy. That isn’t the pride, Em. You don’t have to fear talking back or disobeying anyone. The people here, they aren’t bad. They’re just people—”
“He’d kill me if I tried to leave. We’re bonded. There’s no going back on that.” Em lowered her voice again. “You were supposed to be bonded, too.”
Everly’s inner cat hissed. Her stomach twisted with a wave of revulsion.
“Not by my choice. Wade wasn’t supposed to be mine.” Only one man caught her attention the way she imagined a true mate would. He wasn’t anything that she expected. He wasn’t even a cat like her. The pride had so much wrong.
Em whimpered. “Someone’s coming. I have to go.”
“Think about it! Think about it, please!” Everly said in a rush. She wasn’t sure how much Em heard before her sister ended the call and she was left with deafening silence.
Her head hurt. Her heart ached. Everly pressed the heels of her hands to her eyes and wished for the world to just make sense. She had one life pulling her one way and another dragging her down the other.
The silence included the life she left on the other side of the door. She felt utterly drained and just wanted to curl up and hide, but she owed Sawyer some explanation.
Everly opened the door to find him braced with his hands on the doorframe and head hanging between his shoulders. Waiting.
His flashing eyes and odor of frustration were not what she needed. She cut him off at the pass with her own indignation. “Were you eavesdropping on me?”
“Were you going to tell me who was on the call?”
“What if it was one of my patients?”
“But it wasn’t. It was your sister.” He shook his head to hide the tightening of his jaw. “Trying to draw you back in with tears, was it?”
Everly shoved past him. Food sat cold on the table in a slap of what the night should have been. The angry energy behind her was at odds with the moment they shared before her sister interrupted.
Dammit, if she had to choose between dinner with a handsy man or convincing her sister to leave their pride, she’d take the call every single time. “I have to try getting her free of them. She’s not in a good place. She needs help.”
“There is no way that will end well for you. They threatened to kill you!”
“My father did that! Not Em. Emery wouldn’t do that to me.” Her skin prickled. She needed to change. How long had it been? She’d kept her cat under wraps since entering the enclave to keep the animal from rushing for Sawyer.
That wild energy fueled her will to fight. She spun on Sawyer and lifted her chin. She had to make him understand. “Em broke pride law by contacting me. I’m banished. No one should acknowledge me, but she called.” She blinked. The last words hurt, but she had to voice them. “She put herself at risk. If they found out—”
“And who’s to say they don’t already know? They could have put her up to it, just to twist the knife a little more.” His expression softened. “I know you want to help. It’s… it’s something I love about you. You throw yourself at whatever problem needs solving as soon as it pops up. You need to see that sometimes you’re only going to hurt yourself and not change a damn thing.”
“I’m not like you,” she hissed. Her cat paced with agitation. At Em’s call, at the fight with Sawyer, at all the residual hurt that raged inside Everly. They fed on one another’s emotions and a snarl rattled in Everly’s throat. She wanted everyone to hurt. “I can’t just cut her out and walk away without another look. She’s my sister. I can’t give up on her.”
Sawyer stiffened a little more with every word. “Is that what you think of me? That I’m this callous asshole who doesn’t give a fuck about family?”
“No. That’s not
—no.” She paced away from him then spun and threw her hands wide. “But you’re putting all of your past on my family. Don’t you wonder if you could have done something to make them see sense?”
“Of course I wonder. I want my mother to be happy and safe. I’ve thought about tracking them down a thousand times, but I know it’s just going to be a painful journey with tragedy at the end.” He sighed and the air of anger deflated out of him. He reached for her slowly. Afraid she’d run, or snap? “I don’t want that for you, Everly.”
His thumb brushed over her knuckles and sapped her will to fight. He was supposed to be a source of comfort, not aggravation. The single touch bled into a hand skimming up her arm, then two around her shoulders to draw her closer.
She nuzzled his chest and felt calm return to her. Nothing was fixed, but she wasn’t jumping out of her skin. “You’re right. Is that what you want to hear?”
“No. I want you to believe you’re better off. I want you to put your safety and wellbeing first. I don’t care if it’s selfish of me or not.” Sawyer caught her chin between his fingers and lifted her face. “I don’t want them bringing you down. I want you to have a good, happy life. “
“That’s what I want for Emery.”
“I know.” His fingers brushed across her cheek. Gold swirled in the brown, but not enough that his bear wanted control. “Don’t do anything without talking to me first, okay? I can’t let them hurt you, and you can’t trust them.”
His soft, possessive growl pleased her cat and Everly sighed. She knew Sawyer spoke from a truthful place. The pride, as he saw it, wasn’t filled with good people. He bore scars of a terrible family. She had stuck her foot in her mouth and had gained a husband to escape hers.
In her head, the panther that had started the whole mess plied her with images of Sawyer’s bite on her shoulder and her fangs set against his skin. Mate, the beast urged. Claim. Bite.
The human chose him once, but the cat wanted him for a lifetime.
Still, Everly couldn’t put both feet down that path. It galled for him to tell her how to deal with her family. She held herself back because she couldn’t trust him completely. His pain wasn’t her own; his family wasn’t hers.
Mistake or not, she needed to at least try pulling Emery from the shadows.
Chapter 19
Sawyer knocked on the doorframe of the maternity room at the clinic. Faith and Tommy were inside, but he was more interested in the exotic floral scent that belonged to Everly. “Anyone home?”
“Sawyer! Come in!” Faith urged. “Everly is just getting us packed up to head home. What are you doing here?”
Sawyer tore his eyes away from his mate and settled a tiny stuffed fire engine on the bed. “Just in time, then. From all of us down at the firehouse. It’s not just the ladies that know how to give gifts.”
“No more! We’re up to our eyeballs in stuffed animals,” Tommy grumped with a slight hitch of his lips. He couldn’t keep up the grumpy diner owner act when his daughter was involved.
“At least you’ll never need to buy a chew toy, eh, wolf?” Sawyer teased. He leaned in quick and pecked Everly on the cheek. “I beat out Cole for the chance to come over. I wanted to see if you’d eaten and if you’d like company.”
Sawyer watched her closely. The words were the truth, but they weren’t anywhere close to the need to check on her. She’d been on his mind all morning and had kept him distracted from work. Luckily, it was all boring bullshit, and missing a spot mopping the firehouse floors wouldn’t hurt his clan.
Faith made a happy noise, and her eyes welled up with tears. Even Tommy watched them with a dumb grin on his face.
Everly glanced at the new parents, then at him. There was a single moment, not even half of a second, where her face didn’t change. Then her lips rose in a breathtaking smile and she nodded. “I’d love to, just as soon as I get these folks on their way.”
Sawyer inhaled and tried to sort through the scents of the clinic. She was closest and the strongest, but there was nothing clear about her. His bear growled at him to fix whatever bothered her.
She’d been distant since the call with her sister. Hesitant. She let herself be drawn into his arms, but there was a stiffness right before she gave in.
Her pauses were caused and complicated by their spat, he knew. He loved that she lifted her chin and challenged him. Showing off her fire was a good sign that she was learning to live away from her toxic people. She had a voice, and it was damn sexy when she raised it.
He just wished he knew what was going on in her mind. What was she thinking about, and how could he help? The not knowing tied him up in knots.
He wanted her to commit to him, to the Strathorns, to the enclave. She couldn’t straddle both worlds without being split down the center. She had to pick. The pride wouldn’t let her do anything else.
He took a step back and let her get on with her work. Folders of advice were handed to Tommy, as Faith’s arms were full with baby Mia. Everly gave so many instructions that Sawyer wasn’t sure how anyone could keep up, but Tommy and Faith just nodded along expectantly.
Finally, Everly slowed her words and gave them a friendly look. Sawyer’s chest swelled with pride. She was in her element.
“I’ll be a phone call away if you need anything before the next checkup.” Her pocket vibrated, and she huffed a laugh while she checked the number. “Speaking of. Excuse me for just a moment.”
Sawyer tracked her out of the room, resisting the urge to follow her. There was the oddness again. One furtive flick of her eyes over him before she pushed through the door. He’d bet anything that it was her sister on the line.
He stepped closer to the happy couple and peeked at the tiny bundle cradled in Faith’s arms. The mess of dark hair looked almost exactly like Tommy’s. He wondered which animal Mia would favor. It’d be weeks before her first shift, and no one could predict what shape the offspring of mixed shifters would take.
Mia grabbed his finger and jerked it around with little growling noises. His bear went quiet and sniffed the little creature through Sawyer’s senses. The powerful sendings that urged him to claim and mate Everly doubled with an added image of her round with his child.
He wasn’t meant for a mate and was doubly unsuited to being a father. But if he could overcome one objection, maybe the other was just as achievable.
If she picked him. If she didn’t run off to her pride and leave him more broken than ever.
After a long moment, Everly pushed back into the room. Sawyer couldn’t identify her scent. Under the exotic notes of a rainforest was a mixture of hesitation and determination. She was spiky and sweet and no clearer than before.
He wanted to growl with frustration. He needed to get her alone. He had to figure out where they stood.
“Sorry about that,” she said. She dragged her finger down paperwork. “All there is to do is set up when you’d like me to drop by, then that’s it. You’re free to go home and take care of the little one.”
There was too much back and forth for his liking. He resisted the urge to snatch the pen from Everly’s hand and scrawl in a random time just to get the family out the door.
When they were finally alone—after more back and forth, cooing over the baby, and checking the car seat straps a thousand times—Everly raised her hand before he could speak. “Something came up. I’ll meet you later for dinner?”
Deliberately no details or specifics. He couldn’t call out her lie if she technically wasn’t dishonest. He was sure something came up, just as he was positive that she didn’t want him knowing what it was.
“Sure thing.” He tamped down his growing frustration and kicked his growling bear to the back of his mind. “Your choice. Just let me know what you want.”
Her face fell for a fraction of a second. Then she pinned her smile back on. “I’ll let you know what I decide,” she answered in her own doublespeak.
Jaw cracking with tension, Sawyer left her and loaded himse
lf into his truck. He savagely twisted the key in the ignition and tore out of the parking lot like his shorthairs were on fire.
Growls sawed out of his chest. His bear pitched a fit, clawing at his insides and sending him unfairly vicious images. Rage and anguish tied together for the beast, and he made sure Sawyer experienced them, too.
Everly with sightless eyes and a torn out throat. Everly with a mate mark on her shoulder and Wade at her side. Echoes of his mother with her dead eyes and blank faces, only instead of the woman who birthed him, the figure morphed into the woman he could save.
“Fuck!” The steering wheel creaked under his grip. He took the next opportunity to spin the truck around and gun it for the parking lot near the clinic.
He was sure that call was her sister. Everly had matched his sly words with sneaky ones of her own. She had sent him away, against what she agreed after their fight, and now he had to see what she would do. His bear held him in place and wouldn’t let him do anything else.
She was their mate. She couldn’t put herself in danger. Both human and animals sides were in agreement that she needed protection.
He didn’t need to wait long. Everly slunk through the door and cast her gaze in all directions. Sawyer slumped down in his seat and waited for her next move. When she climbed into her truck and turned onto the main road, he waited long enough to avoid her notice and did the same.
This was the test. Not much existed past the clinic and the road didn’t branch. Even if she had house calls to make, they would lead her in the other direction.
Everly kept driving.
Sawyer swore and made a choice. He was being a creep and a stalker, but he couldn’t let her walk into battle alone. She wanted to test the waters instead of trusting his words? He’d be there to make sure her pride’s actions didn’t leave her as battered and broken as his birth clan’s had left him.
He reached for his phone and punched in Callum’s number. “I’m not going to make it back.”