How to Date Your Dragon

Home > Humorous > How to Date Your Dragon > Page 19
How to Date Your Dragon Page 19

by Molly Harper


  “Which is speeding!” Bael said, flopping into Zed’s office chair.

  “You made her cry! She’s eighty-two years old. She was driving to the yarn store.”

  “She shouldn’t be speeding! Honestly, she probably shouldn’t be driving!”

  “Ever since Jillian left, you’ve been an absolute bastard to everybody and it needs to stop now.”

  “This has nothing to do with Jillian.”

  “So, you’re just making senior citizens cry for no reason?”

  “I didn’t mean to make her cry!” Bael leaned his head back on the chair. “Look, I realize I’m not… I’m struggling. I didn’t know it was going to be this hard. Everything hurts. Everything seems gray. And the worst freaking part of it is there’s no end in sight. She’s not coming back and I didn’t really give her much reason to. And I don’t know what to do.”

  He looked up to see Zed holding out a tissue box, smirking at him. “Oh, fuck you, man!”

  Zed burst out laughing. “Aw, come on, it’s a little funny. You’re finally expressing grown-up emotions. About a lady. It’s completely uncharted territory.”

  “You’re a dick.”

  “Look, I get it. You’re miserable. But you can’t make the rest of us miserable to keep it fair.”

  “I know.” Bael pinched the bridge of his nose. “You’re still a dick.”

  “Have you called her?”

  “I don’t want to interfere. She’s gone back to her life. If she wanted to talk to me, she knows my number.”

  “Have you thought about going to see her in D.C.?”

  Bael lifted his eyebrow. “How would that seem less desperate than calling her?”

  “So I’m going to have to put up with miserable bastard Bael for, what? Another couple of decades?”

  Bael nodded. “Conservatively, yes.”

  “Well, there’s something to look forward to,” Zed sighed. “So can you please go apologize to the octogenarian that you offended? And then go home and take a nap or roll around in your gold like Scrooge McDuck or whatever dragons do to calm their asses down?”

  Bael’s mind flashed back to Jillian’s Scrooge McDuck joke, when they’d been naked and post-coital in his hoard. He shook his head and shoved the memory away. “I’ll try.”

  “Thanks, now get the hell out of my office and don’t make Gigi cry on the way out.”

  Bael grumbled. “Fine.”

  Bael walked back out of the lobby toward his car. He could go by the grocery and pick up some flowers to take to Emily, but that would probably be too much. He decided that a heartfelt apology was going to have to cut it. Because the woman had been speeding, dammit. He was only doing his job.

  “Do you always walk around scowling like that?” he heard a familiar voice ask. “You know the League offers classes on how to be an effective and friendly public servant.”

  His head whipped toward the sound and suddenly the smell of flowers and books hit him with full force. Jillian was standing there, by his squad car. The sight of her face, her hair, every eyelash, was so familiar, and yet she’d changed. She was surrounded by this glow that seemed to shift between gold and blue.

  Bael was vaguely aware that his mouth was hanging open, but he couldn’t seem to close it. Or form words.

  She frowned. “Or I have completely misread the situation and I should go.”

  Bael threw his arms around her and crushed her to his chest. “No.”

  She laughed, sliding her arms around him. He buried his nose in her hair. “Turns out my study’s not done. The League liked my work so much that I’m going to write additional reports.”

  “So you’re back? And you’re staying?”

  “I’ll be staying here for a long time, maybe even permanently, which is handy, because I couldn’t live anywhere else. I was miserable back in D.C., even though it was only a few days. I mean, I loved being able to see my friends, but it wasn’t home anymore. No one was there to force feed me seafood when I was sad. No one was there to kidnap me and take me to parties when I was too wrapped up in work. And you weren’t there.” She wrapped her fingers around his left hand. “And I hated that you weren’t there.”

  “Well, I was fine. Stalwart, manly stiff upper lip, and all that,” he insisted.

  “He’s been a nightmare!” Zed yelled from the doorway. “An awful dick-ish nightmare.”

  Bael shrugged. “I might have been a little grumpy.”

  Jillian raised her brows. “Did Zed not tell you that I was coming back? The League called him two days ago to renew my lease on Miss Lottie’s house.”

  Bael turned to Zed, his expression thunderously indignant. “Couillon! How could you?”

  Zed jerked his massive shoulders. “More fun this way.”

  Jillian laughed. “That’s pretty horrible, Zed.”

  “I was just so distraught from missing you, catin. I wasn’t thinking straight.”

  Jillian pursed her lips. “I’ll accept that.”

  “I was pretty much miserable, too,” Bael admitted. “I’m awful glad you’re back, because I would be very happy if you never left, ever again.”

  She nodded and he cupped her chin in his free hand and kissed her. He closed his eyes, leaning against the car. That nagging empty feeling haunting him over the last few weeks seemed to melt away and all he was left with was a feeling of contentment. And the smell of smoke.

  No, the smoke was real. When he opened his eyes, he realized that he was engulfed by blue and gold flames. They were burning away his clothes, bubbling the paint of his squad car. And they were coming from Jillian.

  “What in the hell?” he cried, jumping back. The flames seemed to slip back into Jillian’s skin, leaving only the flames burning his clothes away.

  Jillian winced and patted at his clothes. “Sorry, I forgot you’re encased in polyester.”

  “What just happened?”

  His shirt was pretty much a loss. Bael was just glad he’d decided to wear jeans this morning. Cotton burned slower than polyester. Otherwise, he might be standing on Main Street in his drawers.

  “Yeah, a couple of things came up while I was gone,” she said, snapping her fingers and smiling brightly as a blue three-inch flame grew out of her fingertip.

  “I have feathers now,” she said. “Also, my boss startled me and I turned into a purple and gold bird and set a conference table on fire.”

  “Well, that’s new.”

  “As far as I can tell I got hit by some sort of wave energy from the rift when Simon dragged me out there. And it changed me, like it changed Ted and the others. So now I’m a shifter, too. My boss says I’m a phoenix.”

  He kissed her again. It made sense that his woman was a creature of rebirth and fire. She was the most doggedly persistent person he’d ever met. She never gave up, never stopped trying. Even when all indications were that it would be a really good idea to give up. He held her tight.

  “Well, of course, you are. How could I expect anything less from the woman I love more than my own common sense?”

  She tilted her head, squinting up at him. She brushed her fingers over his scalp. “You’ve never said you love me.”

  “Well, you’ve never said you loved me either. But I do, you’re what I treasure most in the world and I was an idiot for letting you leave without telling you.”

  “I love you, too. I’m sorry I left. I just needed to be sure.”

  He kissed her again. “What about your life back home? What about Sonja and your coworkers?”

  “Sonja is going to come visit. Fair warning, she’s going to try to figure out whether you’re good enough for me and inevitably conclude that you aren’t. It’s nothing personal. She’s obligated by friendship to think no one deserves me. And I’ll still be working with those coworkers, just from a distance. My life, as it is, is here with you.”

  He kissed her again, lazily, because they had all the time in the world now. “You know Miss Lottie’s isn’t exactly fireproofed, right?�
��

  She nodded. “It had occurred to me.”

  “My place, however, is built to withstand dragonfire,” Bael noted.

  Jillian told him, “You’re not nearly as subtle as you think you are.”

  “Wasn’t trying to be subtle. I was just trying to get you home, into my den, as soon as possible.”

  “I think that can be arranged,” she said, kissing him one last time. “But first, I have some questions for you.”

  His shoulders sagged. “You’re kidding.”

  “You never let me interview you!”

  “I told you things that I’ve never told anyone else!” Bael yelped.

  “Until you fill out the questionnaire, it’s not official. No questionnaire, no sex.”

  He shook his head. “That’s so wrong.”

  She kissed him again and he closed his eyes, leaning into her. She murmured against his mouth. “I’ll race you home.”

  “Wait, what?”

  His eyes flew open just as a large purple and gold bird flew up from between his arms and rocketed up to the sky in a stream of blue flames.

  Zed walked out of City Hall, staring at the trail of flames. “That’ll take getting used to.”

  “Yep.”

  “You better catch her before she starts touching all your stuff.”

  Bael made a vaguely horrified face. “You don’t think she’d do that, do you?”

  Zed grinned. Bael took off running down the street, stripping out of his clothes. By the time he’d reached the pie shop, he’d shifted into a giant green and gold dragon and flew in the direction of his house.

  Later, after several of Bael’s more vulnerable possessions had been burned to ash in their mad dash to the bedroom, two very tired magique lay curled on Bael’s nest of pillows and blankets. Bael was dragging his fingers over her smooth skin, watching the golden light build beneath its surface.

  Jillian sighed, leaning into the caress. “So, Simon was right. While I’m sure that there are benefits to ahem, absorbing dragon seed, my whole inner glow thing is more related to the rift changing me into a phoenix while I’ve lived here. A team of geneticists from the League are going to travel down here to ask the remade magique for DNA samples, to determine if there is some recessive gene that helps determine which humans transition.”

  Bael grumbled, even as he kissed the curve of her shoulder.

  “They will ask very politely,” she promised him.

  “I’m not going to complain about the League bringing more people into town if it means you’re staying.”

  She pushed him away, laughing. “You just growled when I talked about League scientists coming to town.”

  “Growling is not complaining.”

  “Well, knowing how secretive you dragons are, I will leave it to you and your family to decide how much you interact with the other League reps. I won’t even tell them that we have dragons here in town. Though in retrospect, I really should have picked up on that quicker, given that there’s a dragon on top of City Hall,” she said.

  “You had a lot on your mind,” he said, holding her to his side. “And you were polite enough not to ask. And while we’re talking about my family, I feel I should tell you that my grandfather was so disgusted by my mooning over a human girl—particularly after I refused his offer to arrange my marriage to a nice lady dragon from the old country—that he has officially decided to deny me my share of his hoard.”

  “So I’m going to have to settle for a man who can only provide me with a treasure that fills an industrial sized warehouse?” she scoffed. “I think between that and my salary, we can make ends meet.”

  “This is serious dragon stuff, sweetheart. I need to know that you’re really comfortable with it.”

  “I am, I promise. But that reminds me.” She paused to lace their fingers together. “You never told me your dragon name.”

  “Well, I wasn’t sure you were going to stay. You made it pretty clear that you planned on going back to D.C. Besides, I’ve never told anyone my true dragon name. Not even Zed.”

  “You showed me your hoard!”

  “Well, a dragon name is different. It’s something that’s only shared between children and parents, between mates. It gives the bearer power over the dragon. You can force me to give you part of my hoard. You can force me out of my dragon form and make me human again. That’s why you don’t see a lot of dragon divorces.”

  “I would never do that!” she exclaimed. “That’s awful. What’s the point in having a dragon name in the first place if it’s just going to be used to hurt you?”

  “It’s a sign of trust. And it gives you the best kind of power over me, more than you already have, anyway. For instance, if you call my true name, I have to answer and I would hear it anywhere. So, if you’re ever in trouble, you can summon me to you.”

  She bolted up, mouth agape as she stared down at him. “That would have been really helpful to know a couple of weeks ago. You know, when I was kidnapped by a serial killer.”

  “Well, I didn’t know you were going to be kidnapped by a serial killer!”

  Jillian grumbled, “Likely story.”

  “It’s probably not going to happen again.”

  “Well, I would hope not,” she snorted.

  Bael sat up, still holding her hands, and took a deep breath. “My dragon name is…Dave.”

  “What?”

  He shrugged. “Most dragon parents give their offspring names like Qytharn the Bold or Cyveriaus the Silent Dread, because they think it will make them grow up strong and scary. No one would ever guess that my secret dragon name is Dave.”

  She nodded. “It frightens me how much that makes sense.”

  “I need your solemn promise that you will not use the name ‘Dave’ in any way unless it is an absolute emergency,” he said, touching his forehead to hers. “Or in the throes of ecstasy, because there are some interesting side benefits there, too.”

  She nodded and kissed him. “I promise. I will not call you ‘Dave,’ unless it’s absolutely necessary.”

  “Thank you.” He kissed her and a beautiful light warmth spread from her chest through to her toes. He wrapped his arms around her and they burrowed deeper into their nest.

  “Do phoenixes have true names?” she asked, nestling her head against his throat. “Like if I decide to go really exotic and call myself ‘Debbie,’ will that give you some supernatural power over me?”

  “You’d have to ask Earl. But please pick something other than Debbie. I dated a Debbie in high school and she was horrible.” He shivered under her.

  “Make me a list of your horrible ex-girlfriends and I’ll choose something else. This is a very strange conversation.”

  “Well, none of our conversations have ever been what you’d call ordinary.”

  She chuckled. “We need to find a girl for Zed.”

  “I don’t think there’s a girl alive who could put up with Zed.”

  “It would get Clarissa off of his back.”

  He rolled over her, hitching her legs over his hips. “I don’t want to talk about Zed right now.”

  “Fair enough…Dave.”

  THE END

  Discover More by Molly Harper

  **all lists are in reading order**

  The Southern Eclectic Series (contemporary women’s fiction)

  Save a Truck, Ride a Redneck (prequel novella)

  Sweet Tea and Sympathy

  Peachy Flippin’ Keen (novella)

  Ain’t She a Peach?

  The Mystic Bayou Series (paranormal romance)

  How to Date Your Dragon

  Love and Other Wild Things – coming in 2019

  The “Sorcery and Society” Series (young adult fantasy)

  Changeling

  Fledgling – coming in 2019

  The “Nice Girls” Series (paranormal romance)

  Nice Girls Don’t Have Fangs

  Nice Girls Don’t Date Dead Men

  Nice Girls Don’t Live
Forever

  Nice Girls Don’t Bite Their Neighbors

  Half-Moon Hollow Series (paranormal romance)

  The Care and Feeding of Stray Vampires

  Driving Mr. Dead

  Undead Sublet (A story in The Undead in My Bed anthology)

  A Witch’s Handbook of Kisses and Curses

  I’m Dreaming of an Undead Christmas

  The Dangers of Dating a Rebound Vampire

  The Single Undead Moms Club

  Fangs for the Memories

  Where the Wild Things Bite

  Big Vamp on Campus

  Accidental Sire

  The “Naked Werewolf” Series (paranormal romance)

  How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf

  The Art of Seducing a Naked Werewolf

  How to Run with a Naked Werewolf

  The “Bluegrass” Series (contemporary romance)

  My Bluegrass Baby

  Rhythm and Bluegrass

  Snow Falling on Bluegrass

  Standalone Titles

  And One Last Thing

  Better Homes and Hauntings

  About the Author

  Molly Harper worked for six years as a reporter and humor columnist for The Paducah Sun. Her reporting duties included covering courts, school board meetings, quilt shows, and once, the arrest of a Florida man who faked his suicide by shark attack and spent the next few months tossing pies at a local pizzeria.

  She has published over 30 books. She writes women’s fiction, paranormal romance, romantic comedies, and young adult fantasy.

  Please visit her website for updates, news and freebies! https://www.mollyharper.com/

 

 

 


‹ Prev