by Sarah Morgan
“Yeah, that’s me—slow.” Tyler was struggling to keep his hands off Brenna. How had he managed to go so long without kissing her? Now he knew how she tasted, how that mouth felt, he wanted to spend every minute of every day kissing it.
Unsettled by that thought, he swung his leg over the snowmobile and removed his helmet.
When it came to relationships, he thought in terms of one day at a time. More often, it was one night at a time.
“Waffles and whipped hot chocolate,” Brenna suggested, and she and Jess discussed the various options while they crunched through the snow toward the shack. A curl of smoke hovered above the chimney, and there were tables placed outside, positioned to take advantage of the weak winter sun and the beauty of the forest.
“It’s a Narnia day,” Jess said happily, tugging off her gloves and dropping them on the table. “Can I have one with everything please? Whipped cream, marshmallows, chocolate sprinkles—”
“Are you sure that’s enough?” Tyler asked. “Brenna? Do you want whipped cream?” He glanced at her, intending to keep it brief, but it didn’t turn out that way. His gaze meshed with hers. He saw color streak across her cheeks, and he knew that whatever she was thinking about, it wasn’t hot chocolate.
“Sounds good.” She dipped her head, and he wondered if anyone would think it odd if he stripped off his clothes and rolled in the snow.
“Right.” He cleared his throat. “I guess I’m buying.”
By the time Tyler returned with three mugs of hot chocolate, he had himself under control. He put the mugs down on the table, and Jess reached for a hot chocolate and poked at the cream with her spoon.
“So are you two going to carry on acting weird all Christmas or is this a one-time thing?”
“Acting weird?” Tyler picked the chair farthest from Brenna. “Weird how? I haven’t even looked at Brenna.”
“Exactly. Normally, you two talk about everything and anything, but today you’re both jumpy. So have you guys had a fight or something?”
“No!” Brenna took her favorite blue hat out of her pocket and pulled it onto her head. “Definitely not. There’s nothing wrong. You’re imagining it.”
Jess’s eyes narrowed thoughtfully and then she grinned. “Oh, I get it. Wow.”
Tyler’s mouth tightened. “What do you get?”
“You two.” Jess blew on her hot chocolate, a smug look on her face. “Don’t worry about me. I can see you’re dying to make out, and that’s perfectly fine.”
“Jess—”
“Dad, I’m not stupid.” Jess sipped her hot chocolate. “And for the record, I’m totally cool with this.”
Tyler inhaled deeply. “Sweetheart—”
“You do not have to explain,” Jess said kindly. “I’m good with this whole thing so don’t hold back on my account. I’m going to close my eyes, think about the tree I want and let you two do whatever it is you’re trying so hard not to do.”
Tyler glanced at Brenna.
She looked mortified, especially when she turned her head and saw Jess texting under the table. “What are you doing, honey?”
“I’m texting Grandma to tell her the good news.”
Tyler cursed under his breath. “Jess, there is no good news.”
“Believe me, you two finally getting it together is good news all round. I was worried it might end like Romeo and Juliet and believe me that would not have been good news.” Jess pressed Send and finished her chocolate. “Right. Let’s go and choose the Christmas tree.”
* * *
BRENNA DELVED INTO the box for another decoration and handed it to Jess, who hung it on the tree they’d dragged back from the forest. Jess was talking nonstop about skiing, and Tyler answered every question patiently.
Brenna wondered how he could ever have worried about being a good father.
She watched as he reached to hang a decoration on a branch that was too high for Jess.
“I’d say we’re done here. If we hang any more decorations, there will be no tree showing.” He stepped back. “Switch on the lights, Jess.”
She scrambled behind the tree, and Ash bounded after her, tail wagging and smacking into the low branches.
Tyler hauled him away, and Jess switched on the lights.
Brenna sat down on the sofa, and Jess came and sat next to her.
“Wow. What do you think, Brenna?”
“Great tree. It’s beautiful.”
It could have been difficult, but it wasn’t. It wasn’t awkward because she already loved Jess and even if nothing had happened with Tyler, she would still love Jess.
“Can we watch skiing together? All three of us?”
Knowing how hard that would be for Tyler, Brenna stood up. “Why don’t you and I do that while your dad clears up here? I’ll grab some drinks and nachos.”
She saw the disappointment in Jess’s eyes, but they walked into the den together, and Brenna picked a DVD.
They were sitting side by side on the sofa, Ash and Luna on the floor, when Tyler walked into the room.
He handed Brenna a bottle of beer and sat down next to her so all three of them were side by side on the sofa.
Jess looked first at Brenna and then at him. “You’re going to watch with us?”
“If you want me to coach you then this is an important part of learning.” Tyler stretched out his legs and lifted the beer to his lips. “Go on. Press Play.”
His thigh brushed against Brenna’s, and she felt the instant response of her body.
It might have been an accident except that the pressure continued, and she knew he was as aware of her as she was of him.
He kept his eyes fixed on the screen. “Watch him make the transition to the new edge—” he took the remote from Jess, paused and rewound the DVD “—did you see that? The end of that turn blends with the beginning of the next. He’s pulling a tighter arc and cutting seconds off his time.” He talked her through it, analyzing every turn, every movement, and Jess listened intently, asking endless questions about technique and his racing experience.
They’d been watching for over an hour when Jess’s phone rang.
She dug it out of her pocket. “It’s Mom. She hasn’t called me for weeks.”
Brenna felt the tension ripple through Tyler.
“You’d better answer it.” He sounded calm. “No need to rush.”
Jess glanced from her phone to the screen and back to her father. “You’re not going anywhere?”
“No. I’ll be right here when you’re done talking.”
Reassured, Jess slid out of the room, and Tyler leaned back against the sofa and closed his eyes.
“That woman is like a dark cloud waiting to rain on our sunny day.”
Brenna curled up next to him and put her head on his shoulder. His arm closed around her, and he pulled her close, and they sat like that for a moment, staring at the frozen image on the screen.
“You’re hurting.”
“Only for Jess.” His voice was deep and rough. “This is the first time Janet has picked up the phone in almost a month.”
“Do you think it upsets her? She seems pretty settled to me.”
“I think it unsettles her when her mother calls.” Tyler pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head. “About tonight—”
“We can’t. It wouldn’t feel right with Jess in the house.”
Tyler said something that would have earned him a stern look from his grandmother. “I was afraid you might say that. I may have to roll naked in the snow.”
She laughed. “What made you decide to watch the skiing?”
“I couldn’t stand the look of disappointment on her face when I said I wasn’t joining you.” He hesitated. “And I decided it was time. If I’m going to coach her, then I need to do
this properly.” He stared at the screen, and she slid her hand over his thigh.
“Is it hard?”
He turned his head, a wicked gleam in his eyes. “Oh, yeah—” He took her hand and moved it higher and she felt the thickness of his erection pressing through the fabric of his jeans.
“I didn’t mean that!”
“I know you didn’t, but I thought you should know anyway.” He lowered his forehead to hers, laughing. “I love that you’re so shy.”
“I’m not shy! Easily embarrassed, maybe.” Her mouth was close to his. “And I’m not used to being like this with you.”
The laughter faded from his eyes. “You’ll get used to it.”
Would she? Or would this thing they had be over before it had really begun? Even in the hottest, most intense moments of their relationship, he’d been careful not to say the words she wanted to hear. “Was it difficult for you to watch the skiing?”
He lowered his head and kissed her slowly, taking his time. Then he eased back. “Not as difficult as I expected. Maybe because I’m watching for a purpose. Helping Jess.”
“I think she has what it takes to make it big, Tyler.”
“So do I.” He broke off as Jess walked into the room, and Brenna leaped to the opposite end of the sofa.
“Everything all right?”
“I think so. I got to talk to Carly, not that she says much. Mostly babbling baby sounds. Then it was a whole load of awkward because Mom never wants to talk about skiing, which she hates, so instead of that she asks me about school, which I hate. I told her Brenna was living here. And by the way—” she glanced between them “—you don’t have to stop making out because I’m in the room.”
Tyler reached for his beer, relaxed, but Brenna’s heart was thumping.
She forced herself to ask the question. “What did your mom say when you told her I was living here?”
“Nothing.” Jess shrugged and so did Tyler.
“Don’t worry about it,” he drawled. “She couldn’t wait to get away from me, so she’s more likely to pity you than envy you. Sit down, Jess. Let’s watch some more skiing.”
But Brenna couldn’t concentrate.
How could she, when she knew something they didn’t?
For the first time in her life, she wondered if she’d been wrong not to tell Tyler the truth about her relationship with Janet.
She knew how much the woman loathed her.
Had the years diminished the animosity Janet had always felt toward her?
If not, there was trouble on the way.
* * *
A FEW DAYS LATER, Tyler was waxing skis, trying not to think about the time he’d had a whole tech team to do this very thing.
He picked up his phone and called the ski company who had sponsored him, talked about new developments and then ordered two new pairs of skis for Jess.
That was one Christmas present knocked off his list.
Unfortunately, there were plenty still to buy, including the most important one of all.
“I need to ask you a favor.” Jackson strolled into the barn and watched as Tyler finished with the ski. “Could you take a small group into the woods later today? People are willing to pay a premium to lay tracks in untouched snow.”
His mind still on Brenna, Tyler nodded. “What time?”
Jackson stared at him. “That’s it? That’s all you’re going to say to me?”
“What else am I supposed to say?” He knew she didn’t like possessions. She wasn’t the type to fill her life with objects, so she wasn’t going to appreciate a gift that gathered dust.
“Usually you say no. Then when I push you a bit harder, you scowl and ask how well they ski.”
“I assume you’ve checked that.” Maybe he could buy her ski gear. But she already had everything she needed.
“Are you sick?” Jackson strolled around him, eyeing him from every angle. “Drugged? Did you fall and bang your head? What the hell is wrong with you?”
“I said I’d take your skiers. Why does that mean there is something wrong?”
“Because you’re not normally so amenable.”
He tried to stop thinking about Brenna. “I’ve given up the fight.”
“I saw Jess on the mountain with Brenna this morning. She has real talent.”
“She’s a natural.” Tyler wiped his hands. “I’m going to train her.”
Jackson leaned against the bench. “That’s good to hear.”
“She’s good, and there is never any whining or moaning. If she falls, she’s back on her feet again. I get a real kick out of seeing her improve.” He lifted the ski, feeling the weight of it in his hand, realizing how much lighter he felt.
Jackson reached out and ran his finger down the edge. “She’s going to need better skis.”
“I’ve got that covered. Christmas.” Tyler reached for his jacket. “Beats buying dolls and pink fluffy stuff. Brenna is harder to buy for.”
“You’re buying a gift for Brenna?”
“She’s spending Christmas with us. Jess doesn’t want her waking up on Christmas morning with nothing under the tree.”
“Right.” Jackson’s gaze was steady. “So it’s going well?”
“What?”
Jackson raised an eyebrow. “Your relationship with Brenna. You’re more relaxed. Mellow. You’re not snapping heads off bodies. You’re saying yes to things you’d normally say no to, or at least argue about for an hour.”
“Am I that bad?”
“Sometimes, especially during the World Cup, but it’s hard for you. We all know that.” Jackson looked at him expectantly. “So?”
“So nothing.” Tyler put the ski down and decided it wouldn’t hurt to be honest. “I’m taking this a day at a time. Trying not to screw it up.”
“A day? Wow. That’s a long-term relationship for you.”
Tyler didn’t rise to the bait. “Instead of enjoying my pain, you could give me advice.”
“You’re asking for my advice?” Jackson grinned. “This is a first. Give me a moment to savor the experience.”
“You could offer up pearls of wisdom instead of gloating.”
“I could, but where would be the fun in that?”
“I need help not to screw it up.”
“Why would you screw it up?”
“Because I have every other time.”
His brother eased upright. “You won’t screw it up. If you do, Sean and I will kill you, slowly and painfully.”
Tyler watched him walk away, envying Jackson’s calm stability and the fact that he knew what he wanted.
He knew Brenna loved him, and the weight of responsibility was terrifying. It scared him more than any vertical drop he’d faced on the downhill circuit.
If this relationship went wrong he would hurt her badly, but what experience did he have in getting things right?
None.
He finished the skis, took a group of wealthy college kids for their first experience of powder and then went back to the house. Brenna had texted that she was planning to come back for an hour in the middle of her day.
He planned on surprising her.
With time to kill, he opened Jess’s laptop that lay abandoned on the kitchen table and started searching for gifts.
What did Brenna like?
He scrolled restlessly through pictures of sweaters, boots, books, DVDs but nothing caught his attention.
Then he switched to a jeweler but he couldn’t imagine Brenna having much use for dangling diamond earrings while she was skiing powder.
He could buy her skis, but she already had more than enough pairs along with several snowboards.
Pushing the laptop away, he sat back in the chair. He was useless at th
is. It wasn’t that he didn’t know what she liked, because he did, but nothing she liked could be wrapped up and stuffed under a Christmas tree.
Another hat?
No, because she loved her blue one. And he loved the way she looked in her blue one.
He was about to call his mother and ask if she had any ideas when he heard the doorbell.
Assuming Brenna had forgotten her key, he strode to the door and tugged it open, the smile ready on his face. “I thought I’d surprise you—” The words died in his mouth along with the smile when he saw who was standing there.
“That’s funny,” Janet said calmly, “because I thought I’d be the one doing the surprising.”
Tyler gripped the door frame, knuckles white, emotions slamming into him from all sides. “What the hell are you doing here?” He hadn’t seen her since the summer, on one of the rare occasions she’d come to see Jess.
“Nice welcome for the mother of your child.” Janet glanced past him into the house. “Is she there?”
“No. She’s skiing.”
“Of course she is. Silly question given that she has your genes and was brainwashed as a toddler.” Janet shrugged. “So I’ll come in and wait.”
“Wait for what? What are you doing here?”
“I’ve come to see my daughter.”
“The one you kicked out last winter?” Tyler snarled the words. “The one you conveniently forget about for most of the year?”
“I didn’t kick her out. She was going through a difficult phase.” Her gaze shifted from his. “She was hard to handle.”
“All the more reason to keep her close.”
“Don’t judge me, Tyler, when you had nothing at all to do with raising her.”
“Your choice, not mine. And we’ve already said everything there is to say on that topic.”
“She’s been living with you a year, and suddenly you’re an expert on parenting? Since when do you have any idea what a kid needs?”
“I’m not an expert—” his mouth felt as if he’d swallowed sand “—but I know kids should have stability. Someone they can depend on to always be there.”
“When have you always been there for anyone? I doubt you can even spell commitment let alone practice it.”