by Lily Morton
I don’t want to be constantly vigilant and I realise that all along Sid has been taking these burdens off everyone, leaving them free. I don’t think that’s entirely altruistic on his behalf either. I think he does it because he’s good at it and he enjoys the control and the details, maybe because he lived in a world of chaos for so long.
I take care to remind myself that I won’t have this for long for about the millionth time, but for the first time I consider doing this more often. I know backing jobs are scarcer now than they used to be, but with recommendations from Beggar’s Choice I could surely get more work. Cameron’s job offer also comes to mind and I know that I could do that too. Still the hope of new horizons doesn’t stem the sadness at not seeing everyone anymore. I push this aside as I do thoughts of him. I can’t think about that tonight, not when I’m still sore.
I pace myself but the park is bigger than I thought and it’s a good fifty minutes later that I jog into the coach park, but luckily there’s no sign of a welcoming party in the form of a hot guitarist breathing fire. In fact there’s no one about and both buses are dark. Coming to a stop I bend over, breathing deeply and stretching my legs out to avoid cramps. I’m running my hand through my hair and thinking of taking a shower when I hear a voice behind me.
“You’re that’s singer from the Beggar’s Choice concert tonight aren’t you?”
I jump and hold a hand to my chest in shock and look at the two men who appear from the shadows of a parked bus. They’re fairly young but even at this distance I can smell the booze on them and I see that one is swaying quite badly.
“I am,” I say cautiously because I don’t like the look of them. “Are you waiting for autographs from the boys?”
“We were,” says the one that isn’t swaying, with very strongly accented English. He takes a step towards me and then looks quickly around the park. It’s the look that worries me because it says that he’s up to no good and I quickly break into speech.
“Well, I just spoke to them and they’re on the way back. They should be here any minute. Why don’t you wait near the bus and Dave will get you a drink.”
“That’s the driver?” I nod. “He walked off about ten minutes ago. Reckon there’s nobody around.” His look sharpens. “Where are you going?” I’ve been taking stealthy steps to the side of them hoping to edge my way to the bus and safety, but I stop instantly.
“Nowhere,” I say innocently.” I just need to get on the bus now because I’m getting cold.”
“Reckon you must be - your nipples are rock hard.” I gasp in shock at his comment and go to march past but he grabs me and swings me back towards him. “Hey now, I’m just having a little bit of fun aren’t I Bruno?” His friend seems to be sobering up quickly and is staring at the man holding me in shock.
“Let me go.” I twist and try to free my arm but then cry out in pain when he suddenly twists it viciously back and slams me into him. Up close the alcohol fumes are blinding as is the stench of cigarettes and body odour. “Let me go,” I shout again and look imploringly at his friend.
“Rolf, I’m not sure about this. What are you doing?” his friend slurs hesitantly.
“I’m just having some fun. Relax you idiot. I just want to let this pretty thing know how much we appreciated her show tonight. All those tits and legs on show, it’s a shame for her not to know how appreciated she is.”
“Fuck off,” I shout and getting a bit of traction I pull my arm out of his ignoring the pain, and raise my knee attempting to knee him in the balls but hitting him high on his thigh instead. Letting out a cry of pain he slaps me hard on the face. I’m still reeling from the pain when he shoves me hard and I cry out as I fall to the ground hitting my head and feeling the sting of the gravel on my elbows. He moves towards me and I make a crab scuttle on my back trying to get away but the next minute I hear a familiar voice.
“What the fuck are you doing?” roars Sid and then all hell breaks loose as a dark shadow speeds past me tackling the man to the ground. Sitting up and straddling him Sid pulls him up by his shirt to face him. “Did you just put your hands on her? Did you just touch her? Her of all people, you fucking wanker. I’m going to fucking kill you.”
The man is so drunk he smirks. “Fucking bitch was asking for it,” and then he groans as Sid punches him really hard. He tries to hit him back but he’s up against 6’ 4” of outraged man and doesn’t stand a chance, and the air fills with grunts and groans as they strain against each other and Sid gets in three or four more hard punches to the man’s kidneys.
“Sid,” I shout and then shriek as warm arms enclose me from behind.
“Relax,” a warm Irish voice says in my ear. “It’s just me honey. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” I say breathlessly. “It’s Sid I’m worried about. He’s going to kill him.”
“Good.” Bram holds me so that I can’t get in the way, and watches Sid hit the man with ghoulish fascination.
“Aren’t you going to stop him?”
“Aye in a minute,” he says calmly. “I can’t stand fucking wankers like him, think they can put their hands on a fucking girl on her own, against her will. Cunt deserves a good fucking battering.” His accent is stronger now but I shove him.
“Stop him,” I say wildly, as the man groans and blood splatters on the pavement. Somewhat reluctantly he moves forwards.
“Sid, stop now,” he says firmly, and when Sid pays no attention he reaches in and grasps his closed fist which is raised to hit the man again. “Mate stop now. Your girl needs you.” Sid stares over at me, his eyes almost red with rage and panting heavily. “Nell needs you now mate. Go and comfort her and leave this fucker to me.” Distantly I notice that the other man, Bruno appears to have run off but then Sid is rising and coming to me with great strides, his face a mask of anxiety. It’s only when his arms enclose me and I feel all his wonderful strength and the smell of him that I realise that I’m crying.
“Ssh, ssh now lovey,” he whispers. “I’m here now. Everything’s alright. You’re safe.” I cling to him feeling ridiculous but unable to stop sobbing, and he sways me back and forwards rubbing his face hard against my hair. We stay like that for a minute and in the distance I hear Bram talking to the man.
“You piece of shit,” he says thickly.” I fucking hate cunts like you. Now are you listening to me?” The man rolls slightly and looks at him. “I’m going to call the police now and report this but if you say one word about how you got hurt I will find you and finish it do you understand me?” The man nods and I can see fear in his eyes which to be honest I can totally understand because Bram at the moment looks a completely different man from the easy going charmer that he normally is. His accent is very thick and I hear him say. “If I don’t do it I know men that will, do you understand?” The man nods painfully and huddles into himself as Bram walks away. “Get her onto the bus mate,” he says to Sid. “I’ll handle this.”
Sid nods and then he bends and swings me into his arms as he strides to the bus. I open my mouth to tell him that Dave isn’t there but then I hear Dave’s voice and the whoosh of the door as the bus opens. Leaping up the steps he barks out some sharp voiced commands.
“Get a blanket please Dave and make her some tea but make sure that you put loads of sugar in it. Then get Scott to call a doctor. I want one here to look at her immediately. You’d better get Scott to ring our lawyer as well because the police will be here in a minute.”
“I’m sorry Sid,” Dave stutters. “I went looking for her. I didn’t want her running on her own so I thought I’d keep her in sight but I lost her.”
“It’s okay mate,” Sid says calmly. “I know what she’s like if you tell her what to do. It’d take a bigger man than you or I to get her to be sensible.” I want to open my mouth and dispute this but I’m shaking hard now as shock sets in. We ease into what I see as I raise my head is a bedroom with a large bed covered in a brown suede comforter. He lowers me onto the bed and I make a noise pro
testing the loss of his warmth. “Ssh, ssh baby,” he whispers. “I just want to have a look at you.”
“Later,” I say in a whisper. “Please just hold me for a little bit longer.”
“As long as you want brave girl.” He lowers himself onto the bed drawing me onto his lap and, taking the blanket that he’s offered by Dave, he wraps it round both of us until we’re in a cocoon of warmth. I mutter gratefully nestling into his hard body and letting his scent calm me while people come and go, having murmured conversations with him. We stay like that for a bit with his hand stroking my hair while he whispers comforting words of nonsense until eventually the shaking stops. Feeling it he lowers the blanket revealing my face. “Hey you,” he says with great tenderness. “There you are. Are you ready to come out because the doctor’s here?”
I’m covered in embarrassment but he’s brisk now and somehow it melts away my shyness. He moves me into my own spot on the bed and pushes a mug of tea into my hand and when I make a face at the sweetness he demurs. “Drink it love. It’s sweet for the shock.” Getting up he opens the door to the bedroom. “You can come in now. Thanks for seeing her,” he says and a little man with a huge moustache and a very rumpled suit edges in. Over his shoulder I see the boys and Mabe all looking worried and then the door swings shut again. The bedroom’s not huge and with the three of us in here it’s rather cramped.
“Now Miss Slater let’s have a look at you,” the doctor says with a strong German accent and pushes the blanket aside.
“I’ll wait outside,” Sid says awkwardly but I put my hand out to him instantly.
“Please stay.”
“Okay honey.” He lowers himself behind me instantly and kisses my shoulder. The doctor gives him a shrewd look and then proceeds to look me over. Sid’s expression tightens every time I make a noise of pain. The pain is centred round my arms and knees mainly, and it flares brightly when the doctor flushes the cuts with iodine, although my whole body feels like a truck hit it. I have a very bad headache and the back of my skull is so tender I shrink when the doctor presses it. Sid winces more than I do but he stays behind me, steadfastly holding my hand. When the doctor enquires gently whether they’d done anything else to me he exhales roughly and rests his head on my shoulder when I say no. Finally the doctor stands up.
“Well Miss Slater I think that you had a lucky escape tonight. You show no signs of concussion and I don’t see a need for a visit to the hospital. However, Mr Hudson should be on the lookout for any unusual drowsiness or disorientation. If that happens he must take you straight to the hospital. Try to go without washing your hair for 24 hours to give the cut on the back of your head time to scab over. You’re going to have some nasty bruising on your arms tomorrow and you’re lucky he didn’t dislocate your arm, but a few days of resting them and you’ll be fine. Try not to get the dressings on your knees wet. I’ll leave you some cream and spare dressings for them. Other than that you’re going to be sore for a bit. Try not to walk through empty parking lots on your own again Miss Slater. Nasty things happen to women every day. Don’t put yourself in harm’s way.”
I nod gratefully because I know that I have been stupid and stubborn. “Don’t worry she won’t be doing anything like that again,” Sid says darkly and I sigh because I’m going to get a big lecture when he knows I’m feeling okay again. There’s a knock on the door and Bram slips in letting the doctor leave.
“The police are here,” he whispers. “As far as they know he fell over when you pushed him off Nell. He’s drunk and from what my meagre German tells me he’s already got a record. Stick to what we said and we’ll be fine.”
“I don’t care,” Sid says sharply. “I’d have gone to jail happily if he hurt her, you know that.”
“Well he didn’t.” Bram rubs his shoulder briskly and then turns back to me looking at me with his bright hazel eyes. “Here’s the lady herself. Are you okay sweetheart?” I nod gratefully and he smiles at Sid. “Well there we go then. Cheer up motherfucker and come out and charm the coppers.”
Sid grimaces. “I’ll go out now,” he says to me. “I’ll send in Mabe honey. She went to get your clothes and stuff and she’ll help you get changed and into bed when the police have seen you.”
“My stuff,” I say, struggling to a sitting position and wincing at the pain in my arms. “What stuff?”
He hovers over me helping me to sit up but his face is stern. “All your stuff. You’re moving onto this bus.”
“What? I am not. I’m perfectly fine on the other one.”
“Really? Do you honestly want to have this conversation now when I’ve still got a man’s blood on my knuckles?” I shudder and he nods grimly. “Exactly. You’ll move on this bus and then we can keep an eye on you. I know you told Bill that you wanted the other bus, but here is safer and I’ll feel better knowing that you’re nearby and not getting into trouble.”
“I never told Bill that,” I say indignantly. “Where on earth did you get that idea?”
“Bill told me.”
“Well he was lying then because he said you’d ordered that I went on that bus.”
“Motherfucker,” he hisses and Bram stirs.
“Interesting as this is in a sort of soap opera way, may I remind you that you still have to give a statement. They wanted us all to go to the police station.”
“I’m going but the statements are being given on the bus. Over my fucking dead body will they take Nell after everything that’s happened tonight.”
Bram puts his hands up. “Okay, okay Rambo calm down.”
“Whatever,” Sid says and turns to me. “I’ll be back in a bit. Let Mabe get you ready and then talk to the police. Don’t rush, they can fucking wait for a bit.”
He turns and leaves and Bram looks at me and laughs. “Bossy bastard,” he says almost admiringly. “Well Nelly you’re on the big boys’ bus now. Are you ready for that?”
***
I wake up later, disorientated and very warm. I’m lying in bed burrowed under a mound of duvet and blankets. There’s a lamp burning on a side table and struggling to get free I sit up and run my hand through my hair enjoying the cooler air on my face. For a few minutes I sit there allowing the events of the night to push through my head. True to his word Sid had informed the police that they’d have to talk to me here. They’d been kind and impersonal, but the revelation that my attacker had a record for this seemed to make the whole interview fairly redundant. They took my statement, gave me a lecture on personal safety and then left telling me that I’d probably be required to make an appearance if it went to court, and then Mabe appeared. Fussing over me she’d helped me to shower and then get into my nightwear of a pair of pyjama shorts and a fitted camisole. Then she’d helped me into bed. I’d protested saying that the bed was surely earmarked for her and Charlie but she dismissed my concerns saying that they’d sleep in one of the bunks. I gathered that Charlie wanted to keep an eye on Sid.
I’d lain back against the mound of pillows and I must have fallen asleep quickly because Sid had woken me when he’d slid into the bed and drawn me firmly into his arms. “Ssh sweetheart,” he’d whispered. “I just need to hold you and know that you’re okay. Humour me.” I’d given in quickly, overcome from the sheer pleasure of lying in his arms and the feeling of utter safety that he always gives me, and I’d fallen quickly back to sleep as he stroked my hair and hummed an unknown tune.
Now I’m awake and a quick glance at my watch tells me that it’s 3am and I know that I’m not going back to sleep. I slide out of bed and stand up, pausing while my aching body protests. Walking over to a mirror set over a dressing table I examine my reflection. To my surprise I look no different really apart from the fact that I’m very pale and my eyes looks too big for my face. It’s when I look at my arms that I see evidence of the night because they’re covered in finger shaped splotches that I know will turn black in a few days.
I shiver a bit in the air conditioned air and spying my bag by the door
I rifle through it and find a forest green hooded jumper which I pull on. As I straighten I hear the faint strains of a guitar and I know that I’ve just found my missing man.
I open the door quietly and stand for a second getting my bearings and swaying with the faint movement of the bus. We must be on the way to the next gig. The boys’ bus is a two storey one and I’m on the top floor where the sleeping area is. Looking out I can see eight curtained bunks spaced out a lot further than on my bus. Further along I can see the concealed lights that illuminate the stairway, so I make my way along to that to the tune of faint snores and the sound of someone’s iPod playing.
I make my way down the stairs and pause because this bus is one of the most luxurious ones that I’ve ever been on. It’s decorated in browns and creams with lots of walnut wood gleaming in the recessed lights which gives the area a warm, inviting look. Downstairs there’s a kitchenette with gleaming stainless steel appliances and a dining area that will comfortably seat a group of people.
There’s an office area with a MacBook sitting inactive with its screen glowing, but most of the space is taken up with a sitting area which has two huge suede settees in it along with a couple of leather recliners that will swivel to face the enormous flat screen TV. There’s a mess of wires and controllers leading to an X Box and PlayStation on the floor in front of the TV, but my attention is caught by Sid who is sitting strumming his guitar with a pad and pen sitting on the settee next to him. He’s not seen me yet so I relish the opportunity to watch him. He looks sleepy and rumpled but still very focused as he plays the same chord a few times over with subtle changes that he immediately writes down on the pad. The tune sounds somewhat familiar.
“That’s the tune you were humming earlier,” I say suddenly and he jumps about a foot in the air.