‘‘But you don’t have to. This is really up to me.’’
‘‘Look,’’ Leah gazed back over her shoulder as Helaina began to cough. ‘‘She’s sick. Let’s leave her at the next village. Someone there can help her. They can treat the sickness, and when spring comes, they can get her out on the mail ship.’’
‘‘Listen to yourself. You would deny the woman our Christian hospitality just because you fear I’ll lose my heart to her? That isn’t like you, Leah. You used to be far more compassionate.’’
‘‘I used to be a great many things. All of that has changed now. This trip has cost me too much.’’
‘‘I know,’’ he said softly. He reached out to touch her, but Leah pulled back. ‘‘I wish you’d tell me what happened. Maybe talking about it would help you to get over it.’’
Leah pushed the old feelings aside. She had to fight this— had to overcome. Chase didn’t have power over her unless she gave it to him. ‘‘This isn’t about me. It’s about you and . . . her.’’
Leah paced a few steps farther from the camp. She was desperate to help Jacob see the truth. ‘‘Look, all she’s been able to talk about is going back up north. She wants to catch Chase to prove to her brother that she can do the job. She’s obsessed with it. She will do whatever is necessary to get the help she needs. If that includes duping you with emotions and flowery words, then she’ll do it. I’ve no doubt in my mind.’’
‘‘Leah, this isn’t your business.’’ His words were stern and his expression held such a serious look that Leah felt instantly reproved. ‘‘I’m a grown man. I know how to look out for myself. If it’s of any comfort to you, I have no plans to take a wife just yet. But even if I did, I would hope you would respect my wishes and be happy for me, no matter the circumstance.’’
With that he gathered the stakes and tent poles and rolled everything into a neat bundle. Leah stood watching him. She couldn’t make herself join in. She was fearful of what she might yet say, and Jacob had made it clear he wanted no more advice.
They broke camp about twenty minutes later. One of the men from the village led the way in his sled, while Leah followed and Jacob brought up the rear. Leah couldn’t help but wonder how she might yet put distance between Jacob and Helaina. She didn’t trust anything about the younger woman and figured that even now, Helaina was plotting how to get Jacob’s cooperation.
‘‘I have to stop her,’’ Leah whispered against her scarf. ‘‘There has to be a way.’’
There has to be a way to get Jacob to help me, Helaina reasoned as the sled moved easily over the trail. She knew he cared about her physical well-being. He’d checked on her many times since finding them, and he was always happy to share her company. Helaina had not yet broached the subject of hunting down Chase Kincaid, but she was watching for her opportunity.
He will help me. I know he will. He wants to see this matter resolved.I’m sure of it.
She pondered the situation, wondering how to set it all in motion. She had no confidence that Jayce would find his brother, let alone capture him and bring him back for the authorities. It wasn’t that she didn’t think he wanted to see justice served, but Helaina figured he had no real motivation to try too hard. After all, as Leah had already pointed out on many occasions, it was very hard for Jayce to decide to pursue his brother.
Perhaps I can hire Jacob as a guide, she thought. I have more than enough money, and if he knows that I’m determined to go with or without him, maybe the promise of wealth will entice him.
But even as she contemplated this, Helaina knew that Jacob Barringer was not a man to be purchased—not at any price. To be honest, she liked that about him. He wasn’t easily swayed by feminine wiles or cold hard cash. She found that refreshing. In fact, when she’d first met him in Nome, it had been a challenge just to get him to talk to her, much less put any trust in her.
Snuggling down deeper into the furs, Helaina smiled at the memory. Jacob had wanted nothing to do with her. He had hardly been willing to look her in the eye. She’d thought then that it was due to some criminal intent or complication in his life. Usually the men who avoided such contact were up to something devious, but with Jacob it turned out to be more of a protective issue.
She yawned and let the pleasant memories spill into her planning. Last summer Jacob had been so good to help teach her how to work with the dogs and how to keep house in the Alaskan wilderness. She could still remember the trials she’d faced enduring the smells of butchering and then tanning the hides. She was mortified to learn that Ayoona wanted her to save urine in order to pour on the hides. This would cause the hair to fall out and leave them with a clean skin. Helaina shuddered still to think of the stench.
It was definitely a strange existence in Last Chance, but Jacob had made it all bearable. The only truly bad times she’d known were those days when he was gone off hunting or delivering dogs. Those were lonely times for Helaina. She hadn’t been able to connect with anyone else in the village, save Emma Kjellmann.
Knowing there was little she could do at this moment, Helaina allowed herself to doze. As Leah kept saying, rest would see her well faster than most anything else.
They stopped around one o’clock to rest the dogs and eat a little lunch. They were near water, but Helaina had no idea where they were. All she knew was that every hour took her farther and farther away from Chase Kincaid.
‘‘So where are we?’’ she asked Jacob as he helped her from the basket.
‘‘On the Kotzebue Sound,’’ Jacob answered. ‘‘We’ll follow it around a ways, at least as far as Kiwalik, and then maybe south to
Candle. There are some good trails, and if the rivers are frozen solid they’ll make a good path for us.’’
He walked to the small fire that Leah had built. Helaina followed him as he added, ‘‘It won’t take us long to get back to Last Chance if the weather holds. We know this territory at least. It’s always slower going when you don’t know where you are.’’
Helaina sat down on the ground. She had no strength and was frustrated by her weakness. There was a time when I could walk five miles without even getting winded, she thought. Now I’m reduced to collapsing after just a few feet. Still, she refused to show Jacob any weakness. ‘‘I feel much better,’’ she told him. This much was true. ‘‘I’m sure I’ll soon be able to—’’ ‘‘Look, it’s John and the others,’’ Leah called.
Helaina looked in the direction Leah pointed. Sure enough, John and two other men were making their way to camp. They were dragging something behind them.
‘‘We were blessed,’’ John announced. ‘‘On the ice we got a seal. He was sunning himself. He’s small, but he’ll taste good.’’
Leah clapped her hands together. ‘‘That is a blessing. How wonderful. The dogs will eat well and so will we.’’
Helaina watched as the men approached the fire. Jacob helped John with his pack. The Inupiat stretched. ‘‘We’ll have to butcher him fast in case nanook comes to see.’’
‘‘Nanook?’’ Helaina said, trying the word. ‘‘Bear?’’
Leah turned with a look of exasperation. ‘‘Yes, bear. The polar bears will be tempted to take away our little catch. Here, near the water, there’s a greater danger. There could even be other bears and animals who’ll smell the kill.’’ She turned back to the men. ‘‘I’ll get the pots out and cook up some of the meat.’’
‘‘I’ll help you get it cut up,’’ Jacob said, crossing the camp. The dogs began to catch the scent of the seal and started to bark and whine. ‘‘They want to help too.’’
John laughed, as did Leah. Helaina merely sat back and realized she truly didn’t belong in this country. She felt as though she were an uninvited guest in a party of strangers.
I can fit in too. I am strong and resourceful. I can do what I have to do. She tried hard to convince herself that she could belong anywhere she chose to belong.
‘‘I’ll start gutting him, John,’’ Jacob said. �
��‘You all get some coffee. I’ll have Leah fry up the liver for you.’’
‘‘Too bad it not summer,’’ John said, picking up a tin cup. ‘‘We’d make soured liver. Good eating.’’
Helaina shuddered. The thought of eating the seal meat wasn’t as troubling as it used to be, but she remembered Ayoona making the soured liver. They put it in a dish and left it in the sun for days. After it had soured—or spoiled, as Helaina believed was the case—the older people would relish the flavor. Trying not to show any displeasure, she turned to Leah, who was busy filling pots with snow.
‘‘Do you . . . well, that is . . . is there any way I can help?’’
Leah looked at her for a moment, then shook her head. ‘‘No. You’re still sick. You’ll just have a relapse if you start working too hard.’’
Helaina didn’t argue with her. She had no strength for work and was glad for the directive to remain idle. After all, it would give her time to continue thinking on a plan. She had to figure a way to convince Jacob to help her return to the north. There had to be a way.
Jacob worked quickly with the others and soon had all of the dogs fed and watered. As he sat down to enjoy some boiled seal meat, he found Helaina taking an unusual interest in him. He felt a warning bell go off in his brain.
‘‘You look really tired,’’ she began. ‘‘Can I get you anything?’’
‘‘I’m fine, actually. And I’m not that tired. Maybe you’re just seeing me through tired eyes.’’ He smiled, hoping she would take the joke in a good-natured fashion.
She smiled, and he went back to eating as she spoke. ‘‘I think lying around doing nothing makes a person tired. I shall endeavor to exercise a bit more when we make our stops.’’
‘‘Just don’t overdo it. You have plenty of time to rest up and regain your strength.’’
‘‘Yes, but I want to help more. I know I’ve been a terrible burden.’’
‘‘You haven’t been a burden at all,’’ Jacob replied. He didn’t want Helaina to feel bad; after all, she couldn’t help that she’d caught pneumonia.
He ate in silence for a time after that. It seemed that Helaina was content to rest and enjoy the quiet of the day. Jacob knew they would be pushing out soon, so he motioned to the sled. ‘‘We’ll be heading off in about fifteen minutes. You might want to get yourself comfortable.’’
Helaina nodded. ‘‘I have some urgent personal matters to see to first.’’ She got to her feet rather slowly. ‘‘Don’t leave without me.’’
Jacob laughed. ‘‘We couldn’t do that.’’ He watched her move away. ‘‘Don’t go too far. We don’t want you having to deal with nanook.’’
‘‘Indeed not,’’ Helaina called back, ‘‘for you would have to come to my rescue, and you’ve already worked very hard today.’’
Leah approached him as Helaina left the camp. ‘‘See what I mean? She’s flirting with you.’’
‘‘So what? There’s no harm being done to either of us.’’ He finished the meat and handed Leah the tin plate.
‘‘It’s dangerous and you know it. She’s going to presume a relationship with you that doesn’t exist.’’
‘‘You worry too much. I’m a grown man, Leah. I wish you would stop worrying over me like a mother bear with cubs.’’
Leah wiped the plate with snow. ‘‘Jacob, I think we should leave her in the next village. We can always make arrangements for her once we get home. Or you could even go to Nome and contact those Pinkertons, and they could make arrangements for her.’’
‘‘Leah, we’ve discussed this before. You aren’t being reasonable.’’
‘‘Neither is she. Mark my words: She’ll try to force you to help her with Chase. If we just drop her off at one of the coastal settlements, there are bound to be missionaries who can help get her back to the States.’’
‘‘You know that Helaina wouldn’t be comfortable with that.’’
‘‘Be comfortable with what?’’ Jacob and Leah turned in surprise to find Helaina had already rejoined them. ‘‘What wouldn’t I be comfortable with?’’
Leah took a deep breath and exchanged a glance with her brother. ‘‘I was telling Jacob that for your sake, we should leave you in the next village. We can get you better care, more herbs, and warm accommodations. Then we can arrange to have you picked up when the mail ships are running again.’’
‘‘No!’’
Jacob shook his head and got to his feet. ‘‘No one is being left behind. We’ll get Helaina back to Last Chance and then send her home in the spring. We can surely find someone who can put her up for the winter. Emma has that new addition for her sister, so maybe she would let Helaina stay there in return for helping with the children. Leah, didn’t you tell me she’s expecting another baby? Emma would probably love the help.’’
‘‘I don’t want to stay in Last Chance,’’ Helaina said firmly. ‘‘I need to get to Seattle or San Francisco. From there I can get in touch with my brother—perhaps even take the train back to Washington, D.C., and rethink our strategy.’’
‘‘See, I told you she wouldn’t be content to remain in Alaska,’’ Leah said, packing Jacob’s plate with the others.
‘‘I need to get more help,’’ Helaina admitted. ‘‘I need to convince Stanley that I can handle the situation and secure more agents to assist in Chase’s capture. Then I’ll return to Alaska.’’
Jacob frowned at Helaina’s statement. He tried to ignore the woman and returned to readying the sled for travel, but she followed him. Leah came along as well.
‘‘Jacob, I can’t just leave this matter to Jayce Kincaid. He won’t be able to bring Chase in. Not if he was as tortured by the situation as you made it seem.’’
‘‘My husband can handle the matter,’’ Leah replied sternly. ‘‘You need to remember your place.’’
‘‘Bringing Chase to justice is exactly my place.’’
‘‘No it’s not,’’ Jacob said. ‘‘Look, you were relieved of your duties. You are still sick and very weak. Don’t think I don’t know it’s taking every ounce of strength you possess just to stand here.’’
‘‘I’m much better. By the time we get to Last Chance, I’ll be perfectly able to travel to Seattle.’’
Jacob shook his head. ‘‘But there will be no transportation south. We’re frozen in until spring breakup.’’
‘‘But I have money.’’
‘‘Helaina, your money won’t matter. There are no ships into Nome this time of year.’’
She was undeterred. ‘‘Then where is the nearest year-round port? Take me there. You have dog sleds, and you told me once before that you’ve made the trip across the interior. So I’ll pay you to take me now.’’
‘‘Jacob isn’t going to risk his life trekking out across the interior of Alaska for your selfish needs.’’
‘‘Leah, I can handle this.’’ He saw the look of anger that crossed his sister’s face. She wasn’t one who liked to be reprimanded, much less in front of someone like Helaina. He held up his hands. ‘‘Ladies, we’re wasting time. Leah, you need to finish loading up John’s sled and get yourself settled in the basket. He can drive now. Helaina, you need to get settled here.’’
‘‘Fine,’’ Leah declared, stalking off toward John’s sled.
He thought the matter settled and turned to go, but Helaina had taken hold of him. ‘‘You can’t just leave me stranded like this. I need your help to get south. I need more men to go north on the search with me.’’
Jacob felt a deep sorrow. ‘‘Helaina, what you need and what you want are two entirely different matters.’’
She looked at him oddly. ‘‘I don’t know what you mean.’’
He gave a sigh. ‘‘I know you don’t, and that’s your biggest problem.’’
Chapter Nineteen
That night Jacob found himself actually contemplating Helaina’s request to go across the interior. Adrik had suggested Jacob come to Seward and join him working for the rai
lroad. If he took Helaina, she could catch a ship out of Seward and head south. The harbor never closed and would be the perfect place to get transportation to either Seattle or San Francisco, given the large volume of goods that were being shipped back and forth in association with the railroad.
He went as far as to take out pencil and paper and try to figure the cost of such an expedition. It would be harsh and difficult to deal with the weather and unpredictable land. There were mail trails that could be followed, but even these would present dangers.
‘‘What are you doing?’’ Leah asked as she joined Jacob at the fire. Most of the others had retired to their tents and sleds.
‘‘I was just thinking about getting Helaina to Seward.’’
‘‘What? Are you crazy?’’
He rubbed his bearded chin. ‘‘Not the last time I checked.’’
‘‘Jacob, you can’t do this. It’s much too dangerous. It’s not like this is any real emergency.’’
‘‘But maybe it would be better for everyone concerned to get Helaina on her way. You want her away from me, after all.’’ He watched her frown. How could she argue such a point—she was, after all, the one who had made such a big issue of it earlier.
‘‘I want her away from you, not isolated with you for a month or more.’’ Leah sat down and tried to reason with him. ‘‘Jacob, it would be costly and dangerous. You know it would. The dogs would be pressed to their very limits, as would you. The winter has come early and the weather has been unpredictable. You could find yourself in trouble within days.’’
‘‘Again, thank you for the vote of confidence.’’
Leah slapped her palms against her sealskin pants. ‘‘You know this isn’t about you and your ability. It’s about it being November— nearly December in Alaska. You wouldn’t suggest anyone else take such a risk, so why take one yourself?’’
‘‘I didn’t say that I would. I’m just trying to think of what would be best for everyone concerned. Helaina won’t give us any peace so long as she’s determined to get to the States.’’
[Alaskan Quest 02] - Under the Northern Lights Page 17