by Jane Charles
Broadridge pulled his phaeton out of traffic, then assisted Jillian to the ground. Samuel instructed the driver to pull the open landau out of traffic, then assisted his sisters to the walk. As causal as possible, he strolled toward Broadridge and Jillian, trying not to appear rushed. The last thing he needed was someone reporting back to her father or his great-uncle that the two of them were meeting.
“Lady Jillian, you’ve recovered from your injured ankle?”
Her smile was brilliant. “Yes. Thank you for asking.”
They simply stood staring at each other, there was so much he wished to say, but he couldn’t exactly say anything in front of her brother or his sisters.
“Would you care to walk with me, Lady Jillian?”
“I’d find it delightful. Thank you.”
She tucked her hand into the crook of his arm and together they strolled onto the green grass, away from the walking traffic, putting distance between them and everyone else in the park.
“I’ve missed you,” Sam confessed.
Jillian said nothing but her cheeks blossomed with a rosy glow.
“I’ve been thinking of ways to see you, so that your father doesn’t learn.”
She blinked up at him.
“Too many people see us in the park and could report back.” He also didn’t want Danby to find out. Sam wasn’t sure what His Grace could do to him, but he wasn’t willing to find out.
“We can’t talk at an entertainment or Father will learn.”
He stopped and looked down at her. “What of the lending library or the museum? I have yet to see Elgin’s marbles.”
“I’ll be attending the Lo Sbaglio Fortunato on Saturday at King’s Theatre.”
Samuel took her hands in his. “I shall be there as well.” It hadn’t been his intention to attend the opera, but if it was a chance see Jillian again, he’d attend.
They stood staring at each other, and it took everything inside him to keep from pulling Jillian into his arms and kissing her.
“What time tomorrow?” she finally asked.
“Meet me at two at the lending library on Beak Street.”
She nodded, then slipped her hand back into the crook of his arm as Samuel returned Jillian to her brother.
“Where are you going?” Eldridge barked at Jillian as he came down the corridor.
Jillian held up the three books. “The lending library.”
He narrowed his eyes. “Who is going with you?”
“Becky.” Her maid stood silently in the shadows. “If you needed the carriage, we can walk. It isn’t so far.”
“Take the blasted carriage but don’t be gone long.”
Inwardly, she blew out a sigh of relief. “I won’t,” she promised and exited the townhouse, her nerves on edge. What if he had someone follow her? What if one of the servants told him what she was about? Of course, none of them knew. Not even her maid, though Becky might become suspicious if she saw Samuel.
Oh, this was such a risk, but Jillian had to take the risk. All she thought about was Samuel and when she’d see him again. She’d never felt this way about anyone. It scared her. There was safety in being matched with a title and doing your duty to family. Pursuing someone of your heart was an entirely different matter, and she prayed that when all was done, she wasn’t completely destroyed in the aftermath.
A footman assisted her from the carriage and then Becky. “You may stay here,” she told her maid. “I shan’t be long.”
“Very good, Lady Jillian.”
On second thought, she may be longer than usual. “Why don’t you take a cup of tea or get an ice.” Jillian pressed coins into Becky’s hand.
“Oh, I couldn’t.”
“Yes, you will.”
Becky frowned and then looked up, her eyes widening. “Of course. Thank you. I’ll take my time, Lady Jillian.” Becky wasn’t looking at Jillian but into the lending library.
“No, Becky. Thank you.” With that, she turned and entered the lending library but didn’t see Samuel as she expected. After placing the books on the desk, she wandered the aisles pretending to glance at other tomes. As she walked further and further back, Jillian began to wonder if he was even there at all.
When she reached the furthest of the stacks, those containing boring treatises, she was about to return to the front when an arm snaked around her waist and pulled her between two tall bookshelves.
Jillian nearly gave a yelp, but a hand had covered her mouth. She knew instantly it was Samuel and slowly turned in his arms. He said nothing, but lowered his mouth to hers. Jillian nearly melted into a puddle as his mouth molded against hers and he deepened the kiss. Of their own volition, her arms wound around his neck and her fingers threaded through his dark, thick hair as her body heated.
His hands caressed her back and down to her hips as he pulled Jillian tight against his body. Heat pooled in the most private areas of her person while her breasts swelled, almost painfully against her tight bodice. Sam’s lips left her and trailed along her cheek and then neck, and it was all she could do not to moan. Jillian bit her lip to keep quiet as the most delicious sensations rioted through her body.
After a moment Samuel pulled back and stared down at her, his eyes as dark as a forest and his breathing labored. “Perhaps it isn’t wise that we meet in private.”
“Perhaps.” Jillian couldn’t hold back her smile. She’d never experienced the sensations pulsing through her body.
He cleared his throat and drew further back and offered his arm. “What books are you wishing to find today, Lady Jillian?”
She tucked her hand into the crook of his elbow and allowed Samuel to lead her through the stacks. How was he so calm? It was all she could do to put one foot in front of the other.
“I’m not certain. Do you have a recommendation?”
He pulled a book from a shelf. “Fanny Hill is not something you should take home.”
Jillian frowned. “What is it about?”
Samuel leaned in, “Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure.”
Her face heated. “Mr. Storm,” she chastised.
He chuckled. “I should apologize, but when I’m with you, all I can think about is pleasuring.”
Goodness! She didn’t know what to say. Yes, his kisses and caresses were quite delightful, unlike anything she’d experienced, but she also wasn’t so naïve that she didn’t know much more took place between a man and a woman than what she’d just experienced with Samuel.
“I’ll direct you to more appropriate reading, or your father will never let you return.”
CHAPTER 18
Why the blazes had he suggested Fanny Hill? Jillian might have posed for paintings that could be described as erotic, but she was still very innocent. Her responses to his kisses were hesitant, as if she wasn’t sure how to proceed, and she was tentative when he deepened the kiss before mating her tongue with his.
Since meeting Jillian in person, Sam’s fantasies about her would put Fanny Hill to shame, which was why he was glad they were to meet at the museum today. There would be no chance that the two of them could sneak off and be alone, Samuel wasn’t sure he had the strength not to seduce her further.
All thoughts of seduction disappeared when he turned to find Jillian entering the museum on the arm of her brother. Broadridge would watch them like a hawk, as he should. Sam would do the same if any gentleman wished to court one of his sisters. Though, he’d hoped Stalter would have called on Hannah by now, but he’d only danced with her at a few balls. What the blazes was wrong with him?
If Samuel wasn’t so focused on Jillian, he’d track down Stalter to determine exactly what the earl’s intentions were.
“Storm,” Broadridge greeted.
“Broadridge,” Sam returned, and then turned to Jillian. “It’s a pleasure to see you, Lady Jillian.”
“Likewise.” She smiled at him.
Broadridge didn’t relinquish Jillian’s arm to him, instead he kept his sister close, forcing Sam t
o walk on the other side of her, making small talk when not discussing the various exhibits.
It was bloody hell not to have her on his arm, or to be able to drag her to a dark corner and steal a kiss. As much as it was torture to be so near and unable to touch Jillian, Samuel followed them from room to room until it felt like they’d seen the entire blasted museum, including the new addition of the Elgin Marbles.
While the museum was enjoyable, having Henry with her rather dampened Jillian’s enthusiasm for the outing. She wanted to kiss Samuel again, but with her brother there, it was impossible.
It was her own fault. She’s the one who expressed interest in going to the museum. It was Henry who stated he’d be glad to accompany her, leaving her maid to remain home. Jillian had almost kicked him under the table for being so helpful.
But, it was for the best. She’d behaved rather forward in the lending library and didn’t wish for Samuel to think her virtue was lacking.
It was also frustrating. Tonight she was forced to stand with her father and dance with the gentlemen of his choosing while Samuel remained on the opposite side of the room at the ball being hosted by her uncle, the Marquess of Wingate. She hated watching him dance with other ladies of the ton. Ladies whose fathers would consider him worthy even if he was just a mister. Ladies that were beautiful and far nicer than she’d ever been.
Jealousy wormed its way through her gut, and it also made her question their relationship. Nothing was defined. He wasn’t courting her because he wasn’t allowed, so they met in secret. She wasn’t ashamed to be seen with him, but feared her father if he learned the truth. However, was Samuel meeting her in secret because he was embarrassed to be in her company?
Had she learned nothing from her past? Meeting a man in secret only led to trouble. Yet, she had no choice, and those meetings weren’t exactly clandestine, as her brother had been present much of the time. But, why was Samuel motivated to see her secretly? Were his intentions honorable, or was he simply out to seduce her?
That’s what scared her. As kind and wonderful as he’d been, Jillian was still afraid she was once again too trusting, as she had been with that snake Nico.
Jillian’s stomach churned. Was this a game to Samuel?
He waltzed past Jillian, partnering her cousin, Lady Eve Grell, daughter of the host of this ball, and didn’t even look in her direction. Jillian’s stomach tightened further. Her uncle would never consider Samuel beneath Eve. Not like Jillian’s father did. And, they were striking together.
What had she done?
She’d told Samuel everything, allowed him to kiss her, opened her heart to him, and yes, she’d fallen in love when she didn’t believe it possible. But he couldn’t look at her.
Jillian closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She was being irrational, of which she was well aware, but that didn’t stop her insecurities from creeping in and claiming her mood. She had no proof that she was anything more to Samuel than a distraction. If she meant anything to him, he’d at least look in her direction instead of pretending she didn’t exist.
Blowing out a breath, she lifted her chin and forced a polite smile, determined not to let anyone see her pain. If she had nothing else, at least she had her pride. Not that anyone would notice.
Oh, why had she allowed herself to trust again?
CHAPTER 19
N ot once had Jillian left her father’s side at the Wingate ball. He’d waited, sneaking covert glances at her so that Eldridge wouldn’t notice his interest, but she never left his side. Not even to visit the retiring room. Further, they’d left before supper.
Something was wrong, and it ate at him. From the time she entered the ballroom, when she appeared more relaxed than usual to the moment she left, her back rigid and chin held high. Her armor. What had made her do that?
He would have asked that night, but he never got the chance.
He would have asked yesterday, but she did not leave the house. Or if she had, Jillian had not informed Agnes.
At least he knew she’d be attending the opera this evening. Though he wasn’t sure they’d have a moment to speak, he’d at least be able to see how she fared.
He entered the box to find Danby already seated, but this was Benjamin’s box. Didn’t Danby have his own? And, didn’t he have other great-nieces and nephews who required his attention? Or, bills being considered in Parliament? Anything other than attending the opera and sitting in his brother’s box?
“Good evening,” Danby greeted.
“Good evening, Your Grace,” Sam ground out.
Instead of taking a front seat, he settled in the one behind Danby. Looking at the back of his head was preferable to engaging in conversation.
A moment later Mary entered on Benjamin’s arm, and they both stopped and shared a look.
Danby turned. “You have better seats. Can’t stand mine half the time.” With that he turned around again.
Sam clenched his fist together to keep from wrapping his hands around Danby’s neck as Benjamin showed Mary to her seat. The box was well situated, at the left side of the stage.
He hadn’t been to the theatre in over five years and had no idea who owned which of the many boxes surrounding and across from them, and the reason Sam began studying the occupants of private boxes across from theirs. If he didn’t see Jillian in one of those, he’d join Roxburg, whose box was directly across from his and one level below, so that Sam could look for Jillian on this side of the theatre.
She was here somewhere. Of that he was certain, unless her plans had changed after his maid had left Eldridge’s house.
As each box filled, he studied the patrons until finally, Jillian entered on the arm of her brother. She settled in the front seat in the box adjacent to Roxburg’s. This was perfect. He’d be able to watch her, though he preferred to be sitting with her. Unfortunately, Edlridge entered a few moments later, giving Sam no choice but to remain where he was.
Jillian retained the same composure as she had at the ball. Back stiff, chin high, a pleased and forced smile upon her lips. She did not look around either. It was as if she didn’t wish to see anyone or feared making eye contact. Eldridge, on the other hand, looked everywhere. His shrewd eyes staring into each box before looking at the next. Sam slouched down in his seat, able to hide behind Danby given his great-uncle’s height.
It wasn’t that he was afraid of Eldridge, Sam just didn’t want to alert the man to his presence in the event Jillian attempted to leave their box.
As soon as Eldridge looked further away, Sam ducked into the corridor and made his way to the other side of the theatre and down one tier, counting as he went until he was outside of where Jillian sat.
She’d hoped he’d be here, though why she wished to torture herself, Jillian wasn’t sure. It wasn’t as if they could speak given her father was present. Further, she wasn’t even sure Samuel wished to speak with her again. They hadn’t spoken since the museum and that had only been polite conversation. A complete contrast to their visit in the lending library. Of course, Samuel couldn’t exactly kiss her with Henry present.
Her heart stilled for a minute then began thumping in her chest. Was that why he’d only been polite at the museum and ignored her at the ball? He’d been disappointed in kissing her? He hadn’t enjoyed it, or experienced the same burst of desire to want more. She had an idea of what more was, but had never experienced it. She’d never even experienced kisses like the ones Samuel had given her and had no idea mouths sometimes parted and tongues could be involved.
Jillian fanned herself as her body heated with the memories. Even just thinking about his hands caressing her and his lips on her neck affected her breathing, causing her bodice to feel tighter than it should.
Goodness, it was warm in here.
As the lamps were dimmed and the performers took the stage, Jillian stood. She had to get out of there, at least for a moment so she could breathe again.
“Where are you going?” her father hissed.
He narrowed his eyes on her. “What’s wrong with you?”
“It’s just overly warm. I just want to step into the corridor where it’s cooler. I’ll be but a moment.”
“Don’t make me look for you.”
“Of course not,” she said before slipping out the door.
Jillian closed the door behind her and leaned against the wall, thankful for the coolness of the corridor and the silence.
“Is all well, Jillian?”
She blinked her eyes open to find Samuel standing right in front of her, and her breath hitched.
“What are you doing here?” She grabbed his elbow and pulled him away from her family’s box.
“I was hoping to see you.”
“Why?”
He frowned with concern. “Because I have not seen you since Thursday.” He grasped her waist and pulled her close. “I missed you.”
Jillian put her hands on his chest, surprised at the firmness, and pushed back. “Yet you couldn’t bring yourself to look at me at my uncle’s ball.”
Samuel frowned down at her. “I didn’t dare.”
His response confused her. “I don’t understand.”
He pulled her back against him. “I didn’t dare,” he bit out between clenched teeth. “I feared I wouldn’t be able to hide my desire for you. Afraid that your father, and anyone else, would see how much I care for you.”
Jillian frowned. She wanted to believe him, but did she dare? “You enjoyed waltzing with my cousin and dancing with several other ladies.”
The corner of his mouth tipped. “Were you jealous?”
Jillian firmed her lips, refusing to answer. Of course she was jealous. Green with envy, but if Samuel knew, it would give him even more power over her heart, and the pain of watching him at the ball while he ignored her was still too fresh.
“Jillian, they meant nothing. They mean nothing. It’s you I want.” He placed his fingers under her chin, lifting it so she was looking in his eyes. “It is you I love.”