No, she would have to be very strong and in control of this conversation. Most definitely, she mustn’t allow Kent to say or do anything to spoil her holiday plans.
The phone’s shrill ring sent a jolt of adrenalin punching into Kent. He willed himself to stay calm. Almost certainly, this would be yet another phone call from a wedding guest, calling to cheer him up, or to invite him over for a meal. There’d been many such calls during the past month.
Even so, Kent knew the flowers must have arrived in Brisbane, and he was picturing Zoe as he picked up the receiver. He imagined her on her sofa in her Newmarket flat, with her long legs tucked neatly beneath her, her shiny hair a dark splash against the vivid red of her sofa’s upholstery. Her eyes the blue of the morning sky.
He forced a smile into his voice as he answered. ‘Hello. Willara Downs.’
‘Hi, Kent, it’s Zoe.’
Twin reactions—elation and alarm—tightened like lassos around his chest. It was so good to hear her voice and he couldn’t believe how much he’d missed her. For these past three weeks he’d spent far too much time thinking about her, missing her smile, her touch, her company.
But he couldn’t believe how worried he was, too. Worried she would read too much into this gesture. He simply needed to see her again. From their first meeting, he’d been aware of a fatal chemistry, and he’d tried his best to ignore it, but it was still tormenting him like a constant ache.
He’d given in, sent the flowers and a request to make contact, and now he forced a smile into his voice. ‘Hey, Zoe, it’s great to hear from you. How are you?’
‘I’m fine, thanks.’
She didn’t sound fine. She sounded nervous, as nervous as he was.
‘Your flowers arrived,’ she said. ‘Thank you so much, Kent. They’re beautiful. There were so many of them.’
‘Not too over the top, I hope. I ordered them over the phone and just named an amount. Anyway, I’m glad you liked them.’
‘All the girls in the office were jealous.’ After a small pause, she asked, ‘How—how are you?’
‘Fighting fit.’ He swallowed a sudden constriction in his throat. ‘But I’ve missed you, Zoe.’
‘Oh.’
Oh? What was that supposed to mean? He needed to know if she was pleased or disappointed. ‘I was wondering if you’d had enough of this cooling-off period.’
‘It hasn’t been much fun,’ she said softly, but then added almost straight away, ‘but I still think it’s a sensible idea, don’t you?’
‘I’m not sure it’s possible to sort out a relationship in isolation. I was hoping we could talk.’
She made a noise that sounded like a sigh. A sad sigh that chilled him. ‘I’m leaving for Europe on Saturday, Kent.’
‘So soon? But Christmas is a month away.’
‘I’m going to London and Paris first. Ten days in each city, and then on to Prague.’
A curse fell from his lips before he could bite it back. He didn’t want to wait another month. He’d had enough of waiting while his thoughts went round and round the same worn track. Solitary contemplation hadn’t helped.
He couldn’t make decisions about their relationship in a vacuum.
He wanted action. He needed to be able to touch Zoe, to share meals and conversations, to make love to her.
If they waited another month, Zoe would have all kinds of opportunities to meet suave, silver-tongued Continental Casanovas. Hell. Had she already dismissed him?
Surely she owed him another chance? He had to see her. ‘I’ll come down to Brisbane.’ Kent glanced at his watch. It was too late tonight. ‘How about tomorrow night?’
‘Sorry, Kent, my parents will be here. They’re coming up to Brisbane to collect the goldfish and my pot plants.’
Curse the goldfish. Why had he ever thought it was a good idea? ‘What about Friday night, then?’
There was another, longer pause. ‘I—I’m not sure that’s a good idea. I’ll be leaving early on Saturday morning. Maybe we should let this go till I get back.’
‘Sorry, Zoe. That’s not an option. I have to see you. I’ll come to the airport. What’s your flight number?’
‘Honestly, there’s no need to see me off.’
‘You can’t keep stalling.’ He was bulldozing her, but he didn’t care. He’d heard a quiver in her voice that hinted at her inner battle, and in that instant he’d decided there was no way he could let her leave for the far side of the world without seeing her.
‘Just tell me the flight and I’ll be there.’
‘OK, but I’ll need to make a condition though, Kent.’
‘What is it?’
‘Promise you won’t try to talk me out of going away.’
‘Agreed,’ he said, with a reluctance that disturbed him.
Zoe’s boarding pass was tucked into her handbag and her suitcase was already on its way down the conveyor belt as she scanned the international terminal, searching for Kent.
Despite her best efforts to remain calm, her insides were flapping like bait in a net. She couldn’t wait to see him, couldn’t believe he was driving all the way from Willara Downs to Brisbane airport to spend a few short minutes with her.
How amazing was that? She’d given him a chance to cool off and it seemed that he hadn’t cooled.
Of course, she hadn’t cooled either. She was desperate to see him. And yet she was scared. For three and a half weeks, she’d kept her feelings for Kent carefully tied up in tight little parcels, and now, when she was about to head overseas, she wanted them to stay that way.
This trip was important to her. She was looking forward to the exciting new sights and sounds and smells of foreign places.
More importantly, she was hoping that time and distance would offer her an excellent chance to sort through her emotions and get a new perspective on her hopes and dreams. It would give Kent time, too.
Right now, however, she was scared. Scared that seeing him again would unravel her tightly bound feelings. Scared that one look into the deep brown warmth in his eyes could too easily break her resolve. How awful if her emotions spilled out all over the airport, like luggage bursting from an over-stuffed suitcase.
I can’t let that happen. I have to be strong.
It would be so much easier to leave now without seeing him. All she had to do was walk through the exit doors into the secure Customs area and Kent wouldn’t be able to follow her. Then she could keep herself together until she was safely out of reach. Should she leave? Now?
‘Zoe.’
His voice came from behind her, spinning her around, a smile already flooding her face.
Oh, wow! He looked even more wonderful than she’d remembered. He was so tall and broad shouldered and his skin was darker, as if he’d spent a lot of time outdoors.
They stood, just staring at each other. Not touching.
‘I’m late,’ he said. ‘The traffic was insane. I was afraid I’d miss you.’
‘It won’t be long before I have to go.’
‘That’s OK. At least I’m here now.’ He smiled.
Heavens, his smile was gorgeous.
Dangerous. Zoe wanted to lean in to him, to touch him, to smell him.
Instead she searched for safe conversation. ‘How’s everything on the farm?’
‘All running along smoothly.’
‘Who’s looking after the garden?’
Kent smiled again, but his eyes were watching her with hawklike attention. ‘I have my work cut out running the farm, and my mother’s busy planting up her new cottage garden, so, for now, the garden’s looking after itself.’
‘That’s a shame.’ There would be so many weeds, and the roses would need dead-heading. All the lilies and irises would be out now, but there’d be no one to truly appreciate them.
‘I might get someone in,’ he said, still watching her.
Zoe nodded and told herself to forget Willara Downs.
Kent said, ‘You’re going to have a fabulous
trip.’
She was grateful that he wasn’t going to try to stop her from leaving. She hoped he had no idea how easily he could.
His eyes searched her face, again, worried now. ‘You’ll be careful, won’t you, Zoe?’
‘Of course. Don’t worry. My dad’s given me all the lectures about a girl overseas on her own. I have a long list of instructions. Use a money belt. Keep enough money for the day in my pocket. Stay away from the lonely spots.’
‘All very good advice.’
‘And I’ve scanned my travel documents and emailed them to myself.’
‘Great. And remember to keep in touch,’ Kent added.
‘That, too.’ She smiled. ‘I have international texting on my mobile phone.’
‘And you have my number, I hope.’
‘Yes. I’ll text you.’
‘Promise?’
The dark intensity in his eyes made her heart stumble. ‘I promise, Kent.’
His shoulders visibly relaxed, and it was only then that she realised how very tense he’d been. ‘Text me as often as you like, Zoe. If you’re having a great time, or—or a not so great time.’
‘I will.’ She smiled. ‘Don’t look so worried.’
‘I can’t help it. I’m letting you go.’
She didn’t know what to say. She hadn’t expected him to be quite so … so protective … and she was scared she’d start to cry. ‘I should head off now.’
He touched her elbow. ‘You can’t rush off without a decent goodbye.’
It was a warning, Zoe realised, not a request. But Kent gave her no chance to deny him. In a heartbeat, he’d gathered her in, and he was kissing her.
Not hungrily, as she might have expected after their three-week stand-off, but with devastating tenderness. And heaven help her, she couldn’t even pretend to resist. He only had to touch her and her will power evaporated like mist in sunlight.
Now, he’d barely sipped at her lower lip and, already, she was trembling.
His lips brushed her top lip. A kiss, as teasing and as light as air. Heartbreaking in its sexiness. He pressed another kiss to the corner of her mouth.
Wherever his lips touched her, Zoe melted.
Her knees threatened to give away as he took the kiss dizzyingly deeper, and she had no choice but to cling to him, grabbing handfuls of his T-shirt to steady herself. Now she was truly melting all over. Melting from head to toe. Dissolving right there. In the busy airport.
The bustling crowds and the voices over the intercom faded as Zoe became lost in the deep, dark mystery of Kent’s kiss. Her impending flight no longer mattered. The whole world was happening right here. In Kent’s arms.
When he released her, she wanted to cry.
Gently, he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear, and his eyes betrayed a mix of sadness and triumph. ‘So, Zoe … about this cooling-off idea.’
Right now, the cooling off was quite obviously the most ridiculous idea she’d ever had.
Then again, this kiss only proved how very badly she needed a safety net. She was so susceptible to this man. She lost her head whenever he was near. His kisses made her want to cancel her flight, tear up her ticket and toss her passport in the nearest waste bin.
Snap out of it, Zoe. For heaven’s sake pull yourself together. Now.
She squared her shoulders. ‘I—I don’t think we should change our current status before I get back.’
Kent was smiling, damn him. ‘So I guess this farewell kiss was an exception.’
Somehow, miraculously, Zoe kept her face poker straight. ‘Under the circumstances, it was an excusable infringement.’ With deliberate brusqueness, she checked the time on her phone. ‘I’m sorry. I really must go now.’
To her surprise, Kent nodded. ‘Yes, you must. I hope you have a safe journey, Zoe.’
‘Thanks.’
It was happening. Kent was letting her go. Why couldn’t she feel relieved?
His eyes were burning and serious. ‘Remember to stay in touch. Your messages can be as cool as you like, but keep them coming.’
‘All right.’
She thought he might kiss her again. And he did. He dropped one last, sweet, too-tempting and too-brief kiss on her lips, and then he stepped away from her, his throat rippling.
He lifted his hand.
Zoe’s vision blurred and when she tried to walk her shoes were filled with lead.
CHAPTER TWELVE
AT FIRST, Zoe managed quite well. In London and Paris there were so many famous sights she wanted to see, so many beautiful art galleries, and amazing, historic buildings. So many wonderfully enticing shops to explore. She managed to keep busy every day and she found each new experience thrilling and exciting.
She also discovered definite advantages to solo travelling—total freedom to decide what she wanted to see and where she should stay, or when and where she should eat. And she met lots of interesting fellow travellers from all over the world.
But of course, she missed Kent and thought of him often.
Too often.
No way could she pretend she didn’t miss him. He was always there, as an ache beneath her breastbone, a tightness in her throat. Her solo travels would have been a thousand times better if he’d been there to share everything with her.
Even so, she was very disciplined. She restricted her text messages to Kent, allowing only one message every second day, and she kept them brief and cheerful. No mushy stuff.
Kent’s responses were disappointing—often arriving much later than Zoe would have liked, even taking the time difference into consideration. And when he replied, his tone was cool and utterly lacking in anything even slightly mushy or romantic.
Clearly, he was taking her request to extend their cooling-off period seriously, and she knew she should be grateful for that. But there was always the chance that his interest in her was fading, just as she’d always feared.
Zoe hated how sick this thought made her.
She tried to cheer herself up by conjuring memories of their farewell kiss at the airport, but what an unhelpful exercise that was. She found herself missing Kent more and more every day.
It was dark when Kent got back to the homestead. He fed his dogs on the back veranda, then went into the kitchen to heat up a can of tomato soup for himself. He knew it was lazy, but it was already after eight, and he was too weary to bother about cooking a proper meal. Since Zoe left, he’d been working long hours, seven days a week, hoping that the self-imposed labour would act as a sedative.
It hadn’t worked.
Nothing in his life felt right. Each night he fell into bed exhausted, but then couldn’t sleep. His solitary existence, which had never bothered him before, was now suffocating.
He couldn’t stop thinking about Zoe in Europe, wishing he were there. Worse, he kept reliving all the times they’d been together. Not just the lovemaking—all the everyday moments, like the evening she was here in his kitchen, making a salad while he flipped steaks, on another afternoon, preparing a roast, or sharing a sunset.
He remembered the meals they’d enjoyed on the back veranda, the conversations. Recalled Zoe’s enthusiasm for the garden, remembered the morning she’d gone down to the creek with him to collect sand—the soft empathy in her eyes when she’d asked him about the accident.
Each small recollection had become painfully sharp and clear. So important.
Now that Kent had too much time to think, he realised that he’d been so caught up with the wedding plans that he’d never really noticed how perfectly Zoe fitted into life on Willara Downs. Now, despite his best attempts to ignore such dangerous thoughts, he knew that his plans for a lengthy bachelorhood were fast losing their charm.
It was not a comforting discovery. Small wonder he couldn’t sleep.
For Zoe, things went from not so great to downright dismal when she arrived in Prague.
As her plane touched down she looked out at the banks of snow lining the cleared runway, and her first, he
r only thought was—Kent should be here.
Riding in the taxi from the airport, she couldn’t stop thinking about him. She’d brought his beautiful book with her, and now the same gorgeous pictures she knew by heart were unfolding before her. She kept thinking about the night they’d shared dinner on the back veranda at Willara Downs, when Kent had first told her about Christmas in Prague.
If only he were here.
Impulsively, she sent him a text message.
1.30 p.m.: I’m in Prague!!!!!!! My first glimpse of the fairy-tale skyline. Prague castle silhouetted against a winter-white sky. It stole my breath. So pretty and timeless.
She’d only come to Prague because Kent had told her about it, and now she was here, surrounded by its ancient, wintry beauty, she wanted him to be here with her. So badly. How could she enjoy the snow, the castles and the Christmas markets without him?
Loneliness descended like the snow.
She remembered all the overtures Kent had made before she left—the enormous bunch of flowers, the offers to visit her at her flat, the trip to the airport to say goodbye. Each time he’d tried to restart their relationship she’d blocked him.
Now, she had to ask why.
Why? Why?
Why had she been so fixated on keeping him at bay?
She was left with unanswered puzzles. She was surprised that he still seemed keen even though she’d spilled her dreams about settling down. Not that this meant he was ready to marry her. Perhaps he’d hoped to win her around to accepting a freer relationship. To Zoe, in her present lonely circumstances, that seemed to be a reasonable compromise.
However, her fixation with Kent annoyed her. She’d come away, hoping that distance and time would clear her head and her heart. But now, here she was in Prague on the far side of the world, and she still spent her whole time thinking about one man.
She missed his smile, missed his friendly brown eyes, the warmth and power of his arms about her. Missed his smell, his voice, his kisses, his touch …
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