In My Shoes

by Stephens, Adrian

  IN MY SHOES

  BY

  ADRIAN STEPHENS

  ARTWORK BY ADRIAN AND CRISTY STEPHENS

  Published By Stephens Family Media Group at Smashwords

  Copyright 2010 by Adrian Stephens

  All rights reserved.

  This novel is a work of fiction. The names of the characters, places and events in this novel are the product of the author’s imagination or are used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to real events or circumstances is strictly coincidental.

  This novel may not be reproduced, by any means, whether digital, photocopying or otherwise, in whole or in part without the express written consent of the publisher. Requests can be submitted by email at stephensfamilymediagroup@cox.net

  Editor-in-Chief: Adrian Stephens

  ISBN-13: 978-0-9831681-0-2 (e-book)

  ISBN-13: 978-0-9831681-1-9 (hardcover)

  This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  This book is for my loving wife, Cristy, and my amazing boys, Bailey and Brendan. Without their love and support, this book would not have been possible.

  Thank you to the following people for their contributions and support:

  Editing Team

  Jeanette Forrey, Cristy Stephens, Catherine Taylor,

  Krista Hampton

  Creative Input

  Jeanette Forrey, Cristy Stephens, Catherine Taylor

  Dick Stephens, Rhonda Dunaway, W. Terrence Groom

  Support

  To my family and friends, and to my parents in particular, thank you for your encouragement and support as I took this journey. To Ashlea and Chelsea Suarez, thank you for continuing to ask to read my novel. Don’t stop writing!

  Contents

  Day 0

  Day 1

  Day 2

  Day 3

  Day 4

  Day 5

  Day 6

  Day 7

  Day 8

  Day 9

  Day 2812

  Day 2813

  DAY 0

  I sit one row over and three seats back from Nicole Evans in physics class. We’ve been in school for more than a month now, and I’m not sure if she’s noticed me once. I noticed her immediately. For a senior guy in high school, it’s kind of hard not to notice the perfect girl. She’s smart and funny, and when she smiles she lights up the entire room. That’s what drew me to her first. Her smile. It’s warm and sincere, complemented by her eyes. They narrow ever so slightly when she smiles. Her eyes. Blue as an ocean that seems to have no bottom. Blue that is accented by the canvas that is her hair. Her hair. Blonde, silky smooth and flowing over her shoulders, laying gently over her…

  “Jake!” His whisper made me jump out of my seat. Mike, my best friend. I’m not in the habit of drawing attention to myself, but when I jumped I kicked my desk. That was enough to draw the attention of my physics teacher, Mr. Korelinski.

  “Is everything alright Mr. Matthews?” he asked.

  “Yes sir. I thought I saw a…spider.” Chuckles rolled throughout the classroom. A spider. That’s the best I could come up with? Nicole turned over her shoulder and looked at me. I couldn’t read the expression on her face, but it seemed to have a hint of indifference. I wasn’t sure, but I thought she rolled her eyes as she turned away from me.

  I looked over at Mike sheepishly. “What?” I whispered back, trying to project my irritation. He was laughing to himself, obviously unconcerned with my embarrassment.

  “Nothin’…just wanted to see you jump. Dude, you looked lost in space.” Thanks, Mike.

  I had been planning for a week to ask Nicole out. I had the whole thing worked out in my head. When third period was over, I would stop by her locker. I would start by saying hello, talk about our physics class a little, and if the conversation was going well I would ask her if she would like to study together sometime. I just had to try and relax. Be nonchalant. I wasn’t exactly a ladies’ man. If I were smart I wouldn’t even try…she’s totally out of my league. But if you don’t try, you will never do anything, right?

  So, I had decided today was the day. It was Thursday and I was thinking ahead for tomorrow. If things went really well today, maybe…well, we’ll see. One step at a time. I kept telling myself that once she got to know me, she would see that I’m a pretty great guy.

  As the class started winding down, my heart started beating faster and faster. My head started buzzing and everything was becoming hazy. What if she got to know me and she didn’t think I was a great guy?

  What makes me great, anyway? I don’t have any money, I don’t live in a fancy neighborhood and I don’t play sports. Truth is, my father walked out on my mother and me when I was real little and we have struggled to make things work. My mother’s done the best she could, and we’ve managed to get by.

  Okay, that wasn’t the psyche up I needed. So what makes me great? I am smart, hard-working and sometimes funny. I’m not bad looking. I have a nice complexion, I’m almost 6 feet tall, a little on the skinny side, short, blonde hair, blue eyes and fair skin. I’m not going to win any male modeling competitions, not that I wanted to, but I don’t seem to scare anyone away.

  I’ve never asked anyone out before, so this was my big chance. I didn’t want to blow it. If the conversation didn’t go well, I would just say goodbye and work out a new plan. I wouldn’t go all in if it didn’t seem like she was interested.

  Mike looked over at me and motioned to get my attention. “What are we going to do for lunch?”

  I wasn’t ready to think about lunch yet. I needed to stay focused, and lunch wasn’t for another hour anyway. “I don’t really know yet. Ask me after next period.”

  “We are having lunch together aren’t we? You aren’t going to punk out on me are you?” he asked.

  “Dude, I’m not really feeling very well right now and I have some studying to do, so I don’t know. Ask me after next period.” He looked annoyed, but he quickly changed gears.

  Mike and I have been friends for seven years, since we were 10 years old. It’s funny, we aren’t really much alike. Mike is a little shorter than I am; probably 5’10” if he has his lifts in, which he doesn’t really do anymore since I found out and couldn’t stop laughing. He has dark brown hair that is wavy and a little longer than I would have it. With his stocky build, he could be confused for a football player, but he’s not real coordinated. Mike has really nice skin, which makes me jealous. Not that my skin is bad, but his is naturally a very light brown, which he gets without tanning. I couldn’t even get that color with tanning. I would just end up with a really nice burn. I couldn’t tell you what color his eyes are because I have never really paid that much attention. Mike is smart, but he never really applies himself. I think he has less confidence than I do, not that I’m brimming with confidence, but he masks it behind jokes and bravado. He is always trying to be the funny one. He usually is, but sometimes he tries too hard. Mike’s a good friend, though. Well, usually.

  There were five minutes left of class, and I was getting a little antsy. Mike could tell that something was up, but he didn’t know what. I had been careful not to say anything to him about Nicole. Better to let him know after the fact on this one. He might just try to help, and you never know how that’s going to turn out. Mike and I don’t have the same class next period, which is why I chose this period to speak to Nicole. Mike won’t be around.

  “Hey, I can
’t talk after class, I’ll catch up with you after fourth.” Mike nodded that he heard me.

  When the bell rang, I was already packed up and ready to go. I said goodbye to Mike and started walking toward the door at the front of the class room. All of a sudden, I tripped and fell, with my face inches from the ground. Mike. On a different day I still wouldn’t have thought it was funny, but why did he have to pick today to trip me? Of all the days. Half the class was staring and laughing. Not Nicole. She appeared not to have noticed. I looked back at Mike, and he was trying not to laugh, but he was grinning from ear to ear.

  “Was that absolutely necessary?” I said, trying to contain my disgust.

  “Dude, I’m sorry. I couldn’t help myself.”

  “Maybe you should try a little harder.”

  I gathered myself and tried to catch up to Nicole before she left her locker. If I missed her at her locker, I would have to wait until tomorrow or next week. That would make me crazy. I’ve had enough nerves today to last a lifetime. Okay, I can’t show my nerves. I needed to be cool. Not over the top cool, just…calm.

  As I neared her locker, I saw a friend saying goodbye. Perfect timing. I couldn’t do this with an audience, especially her friends. I walked up and left a locker’s length between her and me. “Nicole?” I started.

  “Yes?” She looked at me and smiled. Not a ‘hey I’m really happy to see you’ smile, but more of a courtesy smile. Thoughtful, that’s a start.

  “I’m Jake, and I’m in your physics class.” I leaned against the locker and then, feeling like a pimp, straightened back up.

  “I know who you are. You’re also in my English class.” That sounded a little cold, but she didn’t look angry. Maybe I misread. And she noticed me!

  “Right, well…uhh….I was just wondering if you’d like to get together sometime and study.”

  Now she looked unhappy. “I’m not looking to tutor anybody right now...Jake…so I don’t think so.”

  “Whoa, I don’t need a tutor. I just thought maybe you could use a study partner.”

  She turned her body straight toward me. “What makes you think I need a study partner? Is that your way of trying to ask me out? Because…if it is, I’m not interested. What is it with you guys, anyway? You’re like, the third guy that’s asked me out today. What is there, some kind of bet going around?”

  Okay, now I felt like I had just entered the Twilight Zone. One minute everything was going okay, and next thing I knew, it was like a switch had been flipped. “I don’t know about any bet. I just wanted to get to know you better.”

  “Look,” she said, “I get it. I’m pretty. Everyone wants to get the pretty girl. It’s not happening. I don’t date class clowns. I have goals, and…”

  “Wait a minute. How do you get off calling me a class clown? That’s not even fair!”

  She paused. “I’ve seen your type before. Always needs to be the center of attention. Do you think I’m dumb? Is it a coincidence that today, the day you are at my locker, you just happened to have the whole class focused on you twice? I mean, ‘I thought I saw a spider?’ Then, you fall down as class is getting out? Could you be more obvious? Why didn’t you just dance on your desk and yell, ‘hey, check me out’? That way, at least, you would have been upfront about your intentions.”

  “Wow. Do you usually indulge your ego that much?” I snipped.

  “My ego? That’s funny. I’m indulging my ego, yet here you are in front of me. And there you were in class making a spectacle of yourself.”

  “That had nothing to do with you, and it certainly doesn’t make me a class clown. I just thought you seemed like someone who would be nice to get to know, but forget it!”

  She stood silent for a brief moment. “I’m going to be late for my next class.” She slammed her locker, turned away from me and walked out of sight. As she walked away, I swear I heard her whisper “Loser.” Tell me she didn’t just call me a loser.

  Huh. Well, the good news is that was likely the worst rejection I would face my entire life. The bad news…that wasn’t really making me feel any better at this particular moment. Fortunately, it didn’t seem as though anyone else was really paying attention to the conversation. I wanted to crawl into a hole, but I had a test waiting for me next period, and I was running late. Yay.

  I walked into Spanish and took my seat. I didn’t have Mike and I didn’t have Nicole in this class, so fortunately I would be left to my thoughts. Then again, I would be left to my thoughts. I didn’t really want to think about anything at the moment, but I was having a hard time not thinking about it. I kept playing the conversation over and over in my head. Where did I go wrong? It seemed like the conversation was going well enough at first. Class clown. Of all of the things I’ve been in my life, class clown was not one of them. She didn’t know the slightest thing about me, and it was looking like she never would. How depressing. I felt like my heart was sitting in my stomach.

  Fortunately, my Spanish test was really easy. Or, at least, it should have been. On a normal day, it probably would have been a 20 minute test and I wouldn’t have missed any questions. Today, it took all 55 minutes, and I probably missed two questions. I’ll still get an A. I hope.

  The bell rang and I headed to the cafeteria for lunch. I could have sworn a couple of people looked at me and laughed. Did they overhear our conversation? Worse yet, did she tell them about the conversation? How could I have been so wrong about her? I wasn’t even sad anymore, I was angry. Well, sad and angry.

  Mike came up and sat down next to me in the cafeteria. “What, you’re not eating?” he said.

  “I’m not hungry.”

  “What’s wrong with you?”

  “What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with me? At the moment, you are what’s wrong with me!”

  “What’d I do?” he said defensively.

  “Well let’s start with you making me jump in third period for the sake of seeing me jump. Then, if you’d like we could spend a little time talking about why you decided to trip me on my way out of class?”

  “I was just tryin’ to have a little fun.”

  “Yes, but your fun was at my expense. Not only did you embarrass me, but you helped me leave a lasting impression on a girl I was hoping to ask out. Instead, she ripped into me and called me a clown!”

  “Wow,” he said meekly. “Dude, I’m real sorry. I didn’t know you were going to ask her out today. I wasn’t trying to kill your chances.”

  I didn’t really know what to say next. He looked really sorry. I blew out a sigh. “Look, I know you didn’t mean for this to happen, but it didn’t need to happen. You need to think about the things you do, Mike. You’re going to be graduating high school this year. You have no idea what you want to do after high school and your grades aren’t exactly college level.”

  “You sound like my mother,” he snapped.

  “The thing is Mike, you are probably smarter than I am. You’re acing physics but you’re flunking basic math. I mean, who does that?”

  “I like physics. It’s cool.”

  “Yes, but you don’t really have anything to show for all your smarts. You hide behind jokes and pranks instead of taking a chance on doing something…in fear you’ll fail.”

  It was silent for about two minutes before he got up suddenly. “I’m sorry about Nicole. I’ll see you later.”

  I didn’t say anything about Nicole to Mike. How did he know I was talking about her? Man, was it that obvious? This day was getting worse by the moment. I’m telegraphing my moves and I just hurt my best friend.

  Truth be told, I’m not too worried about Mike. What I said was true and it needed to be said. He’ll probably be over it before I get over this deal with Nicole. I wanted to go home, but I still had two periods to go.

  I couldn’t have recalled a thing from fifth or sixth period if my life depended on it. I was pretty sure I showed up to class, but I was definitely on auto-pilot. Not like I was in a love-lost coma, but more like part
icipating while in deep thought.

  I headed home, still on auto-pilot. I didn’t own a car, so usually I would get a ride from Mike. Today, I just walked. I lived about four miles from the school. I could take the bus, but I’ve never been a fan of the bus. Four miles wasn’t that far, especially when you had thoughts to process.

  It’s not like I’ve crushed on every girl in school, or even every pretty girl in school. I’m somewhat picky. Nicole is beautiful, but that’s not the main reason I was attracted to her. She is very smart. She is one of the top students in the classes we share. She’s serious, but she never seems too serious. When she laughs it’s contagious. Today seemed completely out of character for her. Or was it me. Either way, I wasn’t sure where to go from here.

  I wandered for the better part of an hour before I arrived home. My mom wouldn’t make it home for a few hours. She got off at five o’clock and I would usually have dinner ready for her on Thursdays. There aren’t a lot of things that I can make, but there are a few. Actually, my mother appreciates just not having to worry about coming home from work and cooking. I try to cook for her a few times a week. Tonight was spaghetti. I needed to start boiling the pasta at five thirty to have it ready by the time she got home, and I needed to have my homework done by then. After dinner, I wanted to go straight to bed. I don’t usually go to bed until about ten or eleven o’clock, but I was ready to put this day behind me.

  My mom walked in the door at about five forty-five. She always greets me with a smile, but I can still tell when she’s tired. She looked exhausted.

  My mother is pretty, but she is very simple. I don’t mean that in a bad way. She just chooses not to be flashy. She always dresses appropriately, but she doesn’t own anything fancy. She usually wears little to no makeup. She has brown eyes that have bags under them today. When she’s tired, they tend to look half open. Her hair has gradually darkened over the years, from a dirty blonde, to almost a medium brown color. She wears it almost shoulder length, and usually parted on the left, combed over her right and tucked behind her ear. She doesn’t eat much, mainly because the budget doesn’t allow it, and her exercise routine consists mainly of running around the office she works at as an administrative secretary. All things considered, she’s in pretty good shape. She and I have the same straight nose, but I can only imagine I look more like my father.