“No. Guess not.”
We arrived at Mike’s house and everyone went inside.
It wasn’t difficult to get everybody geared for studying. Everyone but Jessica was already aware of the plan. So when we all sat down to start studying, she went out to her car and grabbed her books. Jessica isn’t a straight A student, but she’s a good student none-the-less. She wouldn’t be one to balk at studying, especially since Jake was doing it. I had counted on that.
After about two hours of mostly studying, Mike put his books away. Because he didn’t have a lot of accelerated classes, he didn’t have as much homework as Jake and I had.
“So, anyone up for some video games?” he asked.
“Not me. I’ve got more homework,” I said.
“Me too,” said Jake.
“I’ll play if you want,” Jessica said. “I’m not any good,” she quickly added.
“Cool,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.
Jake and I looked at each other, smiled and went back to studying. Hopefully that would keep them busy for a while.
Unfortunately, Mike and Jessica playing made it difficult to study. After another hour, Jake gave up and decided to join in. He let Mike pretend to show him how to hold the controller, which buttons made the players jump and shoot, and what the object of the game was. They started playing and Jake let Mike easily defeat him.
Jessica giggled. “Wow, Nicole. I figured you would have done better than me.”
Jake blushed. “I’ll get better,” he said. “Just give me a minute.”
Over the next few games, Jake did get better. I could tell he was trying to hold back, but I could also tell he was progressing much faster than most people would. Especially me.
After another half hour, I gave up on studying, too. Between thinking about Tyler, and the noise these guys were making, I was having trouble focusing. I packed up my things and watched from the table.
“So, do you and Jake play video games a lot?” Jessica wondered.
“Usually we do, but not lately,” Mike said.
“How come?”
“I…I’ve been pretty busy lately,” I said, grasping. Thanks Mike.
“Hmmm…so I bet you’re pretty good, huh Jake?”
“Uhh…it depends on the game. Mike’s much better than I am.” I’m sure Jake wasn’t thrilled I just said that, but I knew where this was headed.
“So, do you want to play me?”
Yep. I knew it. “No, you guys go ahead. Nicole and Mike are having their big competition, anyway.” When Jessica wasn’t looking, I gave them both a glare that said ‘don’t you dare mess this up.’
“Oh, come on. I’m sure they don’t mind if we play one game. Do you guys?”
“Uhh…” Mike didn’t know what to say. I think he was afraid to say anything.
“I’ll play you Jess,” Jake offered.
“What, are you guys afraid to have Jake play me?” she said as she turned toward me. “You’re not afraid, are you Jake?” she said playfully.
Great. This wasn’t going to go well.
“Okay,” I said, trying not to sound disappointed, “but I’ve never played this game, so take it easy on me.”
“I thought you said you played this with Mike a lot,” she countered.
“Mike and I do play a lot, but not this.”
“Well, let’s play something you’ve played before.”
Goodness, Jess! “That wouldn’t make it very fair, would it? This one’s fine. Let’s just play it.”
“Okay,” she agreed. Finally.
I’m not big on video games. I’ve rarely played any, and I’ve never used this system. So, how do I look like I’ve done this before, when I don’t even know how to hold the controller? I mean, it seems like a simple thing, but I don’t know.
“Is anyone getting hungry?” I asked, stalling.
“Yeah, I am,” Jake helped.
“Mike, could you get us some snacks?” I said, subtly motioning toward Jessica, hoping he would get what I was saying.
“Sure. Jessica, you wanna help?”
“Okay,” she said as she followed him into the kitchen, looking behind her at me and Jake.
Once they were in the kitchen, Jake quietly gave me the quick rundown. I didn’t know much, but at least I could now hold the controller and move and shoot. This was going to be interesting.
Mike and Jessica brought snacks back into the room. I thanked them and Jessica went right to the other controller.
“Are you ready?” she asked.
“As I’ll ever be,” I said, grabbing a quick snack.
We didn’t get very far before Jessica paused the game. “Are you giving me chances?”
“No,” I replied.
“Because I don’t want chances.”
“I’m not giving you chances! I’m just having trouble getting my bearings. Give me a minute…I’ll figure it out.”
I’m not sure really why I said that. It must have been the competitive juices flowing through me, because a minute wasn’t going to help me. As Jessica restarted the game, I looked back and saw Mike grinning wide and Jake blushing. My face, his expression…and I could tell he was a little mortified at my inability to play.
I refocused my attention to the game and Jessica beat me easily.
“Let’s go again,” I said. Again with the competitive juices. Just because I’ve never played before, doesn’t mean I don’t want to win.
Surprisingly, I did better the second game. She barely beat me.
“Okay, I’m getting the hang of this. One more,” I said, determined.
The third game was close, but I beat Jessica. “Yes!” I said, a little too enthusiastically. I realized that probably seemed out of place so I quickly added, “Sorry, I got a little carried away there. Good games, Jessica.”
“Good games,” she said, but she wasn’t exactly happy. I think she liked that she was beating Jake.
Jake chimed in to try and lighten the mood of the moment. “You did really good Jessica, considering you just played for the first time today. You did good too, Jake,” he added, trying to make us both feel better.
We stopped for a minute to have another snack. After that, I relinquished the controller to Mike, so he could play Jake again. By now, Jake was no longer pretending he couldn’t play, and he was beating Mike as much as Mike was beating him.
“Dude, nice!” Mike said after Jake beat him one last game.
“Did you just call Nicole dude?” Jessica asked Mike.
“Uhh…I mean, Nice job Nicole,” he corrected.
“I should probably get home,” I said, changing the subject.
“I can take you home,” Jessica said.
I had a feeling she would say that. “Okay, thanks Jess. I’ll see you guys later,” I said, turning toward Jake and Mike.
“Yeah, I should go too,” Jake said. I was hoping he’d say that.
Jessica and I got in her car and I gave her directions to Jake’s house. I decided it would be best to try and control the conversation on the trip, to try and keep from getting myself in an uncomfortable situation.
“This is a nice car,” I started. “How old is it?”
“Thanks. It’s, what, six years old?” she said, trying to work the years out in her head.
“It’s a Camry, right?” I asked.
“Right. You know cars?”
No, I just know her car. I’ve been in it enough. “A little. I wouldn’t call myself a car expert, or anything. I have a friend who has one of these, so it seemed familiar.”
“Oh yeah? Who?”
Uhh… “Nobody you know. His name is…Sean.”
“Cool.”
“Yeah. So, did you get it new?” I already knew the answer, but again, I was trying to control the conversation.
“No. My dad got a good deal on it from a rental car place. It was only a year old when I got it. It had a lot of miles on it, but it was in good shape. Overall, it’s been a pretty good car.”<
br />
“Well, it’s really nice. You take good care of it.”
“Thanks.”
“Sure. So…what do you like to do for fun?” I asked.
“I usually like to get together with Nicole and Caryn and Meredith. We do a lot of things together.”
“Turn left at the light.”
“Got it.”
“So,” I continued, “like what?”
“Like…we like to go to the mall, as you know. We like to go to the movies, and bowl, and lots of times we just get together at one of our houses and hang out…talk about boys,” she said looking at me and smiling.
Uh-oh, a trap. We’re almost to Jake’s house, Nicole. Find a different subject. “Are you a good bowler?”
“No. We just go to hang out. Meredith is a pretty good bowler. So is Nicole. The rest of us just try not to throw it in the gutter. We still have fun, though. Maybe we could go bowling together sometime.”
“Yeah, that sounds…great.”
“I’m looking forward to tomorrow night,” Jessica quickly got in.
“Yeah…me too!” I said with as much enthusiasm as I could muster. “It…should be fun.” Come on, we’re almost there.
“Yeah, I think so too.”
Finally, we pulled up to Jake’s house. “So, this is it, huh?”
“Yep. This is my place.”
“It seems nice.”
“Thanks. So, I’ll see you tomorrow,” I said, quickly getting out of the car.
“Oh, okay. Bye Jake.”
“Bye.”
As I was walking into the house, I noticed that clouds were coming in. It looked like a storm was on its way. I love the rain, especially since it rarely happens here.
Jake’s mom wasn’t home yet. Everything in the house was silent. It felt strange. I think this was the first time that I have been in Jake’s house when nobody else was here. It was kind of eerie. I took my things to Jake’s room, and headed to the kitchen to make some dinner. After looking around for a few minutes, I finally found some hamburger patties in the freezer. That sounded kind of good, so I decided that would be our dinner.
Jake’s mom got home at five forty-five. She seemed to be in a particularly good mood.
“Hi, mom,” I said cheerfully.
“Hi, Hon. How was your day?”
“It was good. How was yours?”
“It was pretty good. Everything seemed to just go right today.”
“That’s great!” I said. I wish I could say the same.
“Yeah. It’s always nice when that happens. So, what did you do today?”
“The usual. Classes went well. A couple of us went to Mike’s house after school.”
“Oh yeah? What did you guys do?”
“We studied for a couple of hours, and then we played video games for a while.”
“You studied at Mike’s house?”
“Yeah.”
“So, maybe I’m wrong, but you never study at Mike’s house, do you?”
“No, not usually.”
She looked at me for a moment. “So, are you going to tell me what brought that on, or is it a secret?” She was playfully teasing.
“No, it’s not a secret,” I said, laughing. “I think Mike has decided to do better in school. At least, he’s been trying harder as of late.”
“That’s great! How long has this been going on for?”
“About…well, today,” I said, smiling.
“Well, better late than never. Hopefully he sticks with it.”
“Yeah.” I didn’t know what else to say. I hoped he’d stay with it, too.
We sat down to dinner. I had added some green beans to the meal. Nothing fancy, but it did the job. Jake’s mom and I talked more about our days while we ate dinner. I’ve become comfortable talking to her, like a second mom.
Realizing this made me a little sad, because it made me think about how little I’ve seen of my parents lately. It made me even sadder to think about Jake, and how he doesn’t even have a dad. At some point I’ll get my dad back. Jake won’t. I wondered if he was enjoying having my dad around or whether it even mattered to him.
Lots of teenagers would love to have a break from their parents. Not me. Even when I disagree with them, I never get so upset that I don’t want to be near them for any real amount of time. And now, knowing they are there with Tyler, and I can’t be…
I was brought out of my brief trance by Jake’s cell phone vibrating. It startled me a bit and Jake’s mom noticed.
“What’s that? Did you get a cell phone?” she asked.
I didn’t know how to respond. Tell her yes, or lie? Would she be upset if Jake had a cell phone?
“Uhh…yeah. Nicole got a new phone and gave me her old one. It’s nothing fancy, and it’s nice because it’s a pre-paid phone. That way I can put a specific number of minutes on it and when they’re out, they’re out,” I said shrugging. “Is that okay?” I added, hoping to diffuse a problem before it started.
“Well, I guess so. Is it okay with her parents that she gave you a phone?”
“Oh yeah. She was just going to get rid of it, so she figured it made sense to give it to me.”
“Well, okay. Leave me the number. It’ll be nice to have another way to get a hold of you.”
“Sure,” I answered.
I looked down at the phone. There was a text message from Jake. “I’ve been thinking…tell my mother I would like to get a car with some of my money.”
My face must have had an interesting look on it, because Jake’s mom chimed in, “Is everything okay?”
I gathered myself and put the phone away. “Yeah, I’m fine, why?”
“You just got this strange look on your face.”
“Huh. No, I’m fine.”
I got up and started washing the dishes. Once I finished, Jake’s mom thanked me for making dinner, and I headed to Jake’s room.
Once I made it to Jake’s room, I answered the text. “Why now? Do we really need to add more to everything going on? Things could be back to normal tomorrow, and then you could ask her yourself.”
It took him about five minutes to respond back. When he did, he called. “I just think the moment is right now. She has been keeping this in for a long time, and she decided to tell me about this now. I may have a better chance of her saying yes if a bunch of time hasn’t passed.”
“You’re playing on her sympathies,” I said.
“I don’t really think that’s fair. I think it’s reasonable to ask to have some of the money go toward me having a car. Don’t most people ask for things when they have the best chance of getting the response they want?”
“I guess so, but Jake, can’t you just wait until you change back?”
“If I knew when that would be, I could answer that. What if it’s three weeks from now?”
“Then I will be doing without a car until then.”
“Yes, but this is less about getting a car now than it is getting her approval now. I just want to open up the conversation so she can think about it.”
“Okay, but I don’t want to do it tonight. Wait until tomorrow. That way, if you change back, you can ask her yourself.”
“Fine, but if we don’t change back, will you ask her tomorrow?”
“You forget…I have a date tomorrow night. If I can when I get home, I will. But we need to discuss how you think this conversation will go, and what argument you want me to make for you.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. I think.”
“Talk to you tomorrow. Good night.”
“Good night,” I said, and then hung up.
Great. As if I didn’t have enough to think about. Now I’ve got to possibly negotiate a car for Jake. I mean, I understand where he is coming from. I miss my car. It would be nice not to have to depend on Mike for transportation. Still…I just don’t think this is the right time.
It occurred to me that I had not done any laundry since…well, let’s just say I neede
d to do laundry. I sorted Jake’s dirty clothes and started with colors. I started the washer and went back to Jake’s room to finish the studying I was too distracted to finish at Mike’s house.
I studied for a while longer, and then I decided to try and relax. I got onto Jake’s computer, got on the internet and went to a Sudoku website. I don’t know why, but Sudoku puzzles relax me. I like the challenge, and they’re fun.
After an hour or so of that, I got off the internet. Jake has a modest music collection. I hadn’t really gone through it up to this point. Usually, I play music a lot. I love music. It makes me happy and I feel free when I sing. Singing makes me feel more…alive.
We’ve had so much going on since the switch that I haven’t sang much at all. I still don’t really know what kind of a voice Jake has.
As I started looking through his music, I realized we had very similar tastes in music. Most of the music I recognized, and most of it was music from the last few years.
One CD was from 1987. The album was called All That Jazz and it was by a group called Breathe. I wasn’t familiar with them. I wasn’t born in 1987, and it wasn’t exactly classic music. My music taste is pretty eclectic. I like a lot of modern rock and pop, but I also like Journey, Queen, Elvis, Billy Joel, Michael Jackson…My parents have exposed me to a lot of music from their generation and earlier. This group I hadn’t heard of.
I put the CD into Jake’s computer CD drive and started listening. The first couple of songs were okay, but I found out why he had the album after the fourth song. “Hands to Heaven” was the title of the fourth song. It was beautiful.
I played it again and again, memorizing all of the words and notes until I had the phrasing just right.
It was getting close to time for bed. I pulled the colors, which were now in the dryer, out and took them into Jake’s room to fold them.
I could hear thunder outside in the distance. We so rarely get rain here, that I was kind of hoping we would get some. I love hearing the rain at night, and the smell of the rain in the morning air. I can only hope I’ll wake up tomorrow morning in my own bed and have rain when I go outside. I was trying real hard not to get my hopes up for either to happen.
I had finished listening to the Breathe album. There were quite a few songs I really liked. I decided I’d have to get it myself, once we’d changed back.
In My Shoes Page 23