I just wanted to get away from him. I’d finish grooming Charlie later. He was too close. I couldn’t breathe.
Of course, he made no attempt at moving, so I began to step around him. He grabbed my arm, squeezing my bicep painfully as I struggled to free myself from his grip.
“Listen, Lily, nobody leaves me!” he spat. “Have you lost your mind? Do you know what you’re giving up? The kind of life you could have? With you by my side, we could be the power couple of the rodeo circuit!”
“I don’t care!” I seethed, finally pulling my arm free. I pushed against his chest, pushing him away from me. “I know what I don’t want, and that’s a man that doesn’t know the meaning of loyalty, much less integrity!”
“Lily, I can’t do all this without you! I need you!”
“No, Brock!” I cried.
“You know, what, Lily?” he said, his voice lowered to a menacing growl. “You’re making a huge mistake. You think anyone else is going to want you? You think you’ll ever catch another man like me? I’m the best thing that ever happened to you!”
“Oh, you think so, Brock? Well, if that’s the case, then my situation can only improve, because you’re a fucking asshole!” I pushed past him and he stumbled to the side to let me pass.
“You’re going to regret this, Lily,” he called after me. My boots pounded the pavement as I walked away. I shook my head at his words, knowing with complete certainty that the only thing I would regret was not leaving him sooner.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
LEE
I hid around the corner as I realized what I was walking up on. I didn’t mean to spy on them, but I didn’t want to interrupt them either.
Once I saw Brock put his hands on Lily, I was two seconds away from tearing his head off. But instead, I waited, and Lily handled it just fine all by herself.
Part of me wanted to tell Lily that I’d seen Brock in that alley that first night I’d arrived in Houston, but what purpose would that serve, really? Sure, she’d see what a prick he was, but it looked like he was doing a damned good job of showing her that side of himself without any help from me.
So, I stayed far away and I stayed out of it. Once I’d seen that she’d escaped his clutches safely, I went back to work and back to minding my own business.
I was sweeping out a stall when Brock thundered past me. I watched him walk by and he met my eye. He was angry, that was obvious.
“What are you looking at?” he growled, as he walked by. I just smirked and ignored him, turning my back on him as if I didn’t hear him at all.
I was pretty sure it only pissed him off more thinking his pretty face was invisible to someone and the thought of pissing him off made me happy.
It was about time someone else was miserable besides me.
I’d had a big, heaping dose of misery and I was ready for a little dessert. Maybe something sweet with some strawberry blonde curls on top?
It was obvious Lily was more than finished with Scumbag Brock, so maybe she’d be up for a little bit of a distraction herself?
I made a promise to myself not to sell myself short, man-up and ask her out later. The worst that could happen was that she said no, and it wouldn’t be the first time I’d heard that, despite my reputation.
Hopefully, Lily hadn’t heard any of that nonsense, because a growing part of me wanted to leave the past far, far behind.
As if that could ever happen, I thought. My parent’s faces loomed in my mind and I made a second promise to myself - I’d call them later and check in. Try to find a way to make peace, to make some sense out of all of this mess.
I didn’t know when. I didn’t know how. But I figured there had to be a greener pasture waiting somewhere for us all.
All I had was hope.
That word was becoming quite ironic for me. But if hope springs eternal, then let the floodgates open. Because hope was something I desperately needed to find a way to hold onto.
CHAPTER TWENTY
LILY
To say my dad took the news of my breakup with Brock well would be an understatement. He picked me up and swirled me around the room, a huge smile on his face.
“Thank goodness, Lily! You’re too good for that snake.”
“Snake?” I exclaimed. “Daddy!”
“Well, it’s true. I’ve watched Brock Tyler grow slimier and slimier over the years. He only seems to be interested in himself, his money, and whatever he can get out of someone else. I held my tongue out of respect for you, Lily. I’m glad I can finally say my peace.”
“Daddy, you could have told me how you really felt about him,” I said. I was shocked that both my parents felt the same way about him. I never knew. Was I really so blind?
“Would it have made a difference, honey? You needed to figure it out for yourself. What happened that finally opened your eyes, Lily?”
I shook my head adamantly.
“It doesn’t matter, Daddy. You really don’t want to know,” I said, a slow blush rising to my cheeks.
“If you say so,” he replied, letting me off the hook easily. “Whatever it was, I’m glad you’re coming out of this relatively unscathed. You are okay, right?” he asked, concern filling his eyes.
“Yes, Daddy. I’m great, actually,” I said, smiling up at him.
“I’ve always loved your strength, sweetheart,” he said, pulling me into his arms. “You get that from your Mom.”
I wrapped my arms around his big potbelly, snuggling in close and inhaling his Old Spice. He smelled like home.
“Thanks, Daddy,” I murmured. “I love you.”
“Love you, too, little one. Now, go get back to work!”
***
Three hours later, I was walking Charlie around the pasture to cool him down after our afternoon practice when I spotted Lee coming out of the barn. I watched him for a few minutes as I slowly walked Charlie his way.
He was so tall, so lanky, so mysterious looking with his dark hair and black Stetson pulled low over his eyes. He was strong, his movements purposeful and sure as he hauled bales of hay out of the barn and threw them in the pasture. Every muscle rippled under the sun and I was mesmerized watching him.
“Hey,” he said, raising his hat and wiping his brow as he watched me approach.
“Hey,” I replied, suddenly overwhelmed with shyness. Lee Haggard had a staggeringly intense effect on me and while it was completely intriguing, part of me was afraid of it. I hadn’t forgotten about Lee’s bad boy reputation and the last thing I needed was to get tangled up in another situation like I was in with Brock.
“How was practice?” he asked. “You ready to kick some ass in the competition?”
“Sure am,” I said, my voice full of much more confidence than I felt. Truth was, there were a lot of strong riders this year that I was running against, and while I knew I had a strong chance at victory, it wasn’t going to be a cake walk. I’d been practicing all year with Charlie, doing two or three runs a day with him, and we’d shaved almost three seconds off of our time but it still wasn’t enough to win first place. Nevertheless, I was determined to put on a confident face until it was all over.
“You looked strong out there,” Lee said. “Real strong.”
“Thanks, Lee,” I replied. “Charlie and I have been practicing a lot.”
“That’s what it takes, ain’t it? Looks like it’s paying off,” he said, raking his eyes over my body. I knew he meant the racing, but the way he looked at me made me blush.
“Do you want to go get a beer?” he asked, a slow, half-assed grin spreading across his face. “Later, I mean?”
“Sure,” I said, without hesitation. Whatever trepidation I’d had about not getting mixed up with a man like Lee disappeared like it’d never been there at all.
“Well, alright,” he drawled, tipping his hat at me again.
Fuck, I thought, I’ll be damned if that’s not the sexiest damned gesture ever. I never got tired of it.
“I’d love to get a
beer with you, Lee,” I said. I remembered the way his hair fell across his face when I’d brought him dinner and I felt the urge again to take off his hat and run my fingers through it.
“Sounds great. I’ll be done in a few hours. You pick the place and I’ll drive.”
“Okay, sure. About seven?”
“Perfect.” He flashed that grin at me again and I melted inside.
“Perfect,” I said, trying to smile back without revealing just how nervous I suddenly was.
Charlie and I walked away, leaving him there to watch us leave. I’d somehow managed to get rid of one man and get a date with another in the same day.
Vivian would be proud, I thought. She was always telling me it was time I left Brock and took hold of my life and steered it in the direction I wanted to go, not just sit there and hang on for the ride.
Maybe Lee wasn’t the one, but he’d make a damn good start. And that was okay.
I smiled as I returned Charlie back to his stall, Lee’s mysterious dark eyes dancing in my head as butterflies danced in my stomach. I had a date!
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
LEE
“So you just wandered around?” Lily was sitting across from me at the tavern around the corner from the practice pen. She kept asking me questions, so many it was beginning to make me uncomfortable. I was never one to talk about myself, but I didn’t want to be rude. Problem was, all her questions just seemed to put a point on the fact that I’d accomplished exactly nothing in my life.
“Pretty much. I’ve worked odd jobs here and there, just never really found anything that stuck.” I answered, feeling like a loser. I had decided to keep my answers vague. What was I going to do? Tell her about my ventures with Eva? Sweet, innocent Lily certainly didn’t want to hear about that.
Fuck, I didn’t want to hear about it. I wished I could forget that whole period of my life. But there was a lot I’d done over the years that I wished I could forget. So far, I’d even failed at forgetting.
“So, tell me about you,” I said, leaning across the table and fixing my gaze on her emerald green eyes. I could stare into them all day. When she laughed, the little gold flecks in them sparkled like tiny little stars. I couldn’t help but be damned near enchanted by them.
“What about me?” she asked, running her fingers through her curls as she pushed them away from her face.
“Tell me everything,” I prodded.
“Everything?” she laughed. “That’ll take about ten minutes.”
I sat back in my chair and folded my hands behind my head dramatically.
“I’ve got all night, beauty,” I said. I could have swore I saw a pinkness spread to her cheeks and it made me smile.
“Well, I’m in my senior year at Rice. I’m studying to be a large animal vet, specializing in horses.”
“Yes, you told me that! So impressive!” I said.
“I haven’t gotten into vet school yet. It’s a long road, but I’m still on it. I haven’t given up yet. I’m about to graduate with a wildlife biology degree, but there’s still about eight more years of school before I become a vet.”
“Wow,” I replied, whistling. “How do you still have time to work at your dad’s and compete?”
“It’s not easy, trust me,” she said. “So far, I’ve managed to juggle it somehow. Although, I wake up every day thinking it’ll all fall apart and I’ll fall off the proverbial horse.”
“If you’ve made it this far, then that says something,” I said, staring at her across the table and drinking in her beauty. “You’re strong, Lily.”
“I guess,” she said, looking away shyly.
“Don’t sell yourself short. You deserve to be whatever you want to be.” I thought of her boyfriend - wait, her ex-boyfriend - and hated him even more. She was amazing - ambitious, smart, strong, beautiful - every man’s dream - and he treated her like shit. If he walked in the door right now, I’d have to fight like hell not to punch his fuckin’ lights out.
“So do you,” she said, looking back at me. “We all do.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I replied.
“So what are your dreams, Lee?”
“My dreams?” Her question stopped me short. I’d not let myself have dreams in years. “I don’t know, Lily. To be honest, I’ve been busy just trying to survive and I ain’t had a lot of time to think about dreams.”
“Yeah, but surely you had something? What did you want to grow up to be?”
“Well, that’s easy. I wanted to win the state championship in bull riding.”
“And you did that, right?”
“Sure as hell did. It was probably the best moment of my life, to tell you the truth. I worked my ass off for that title, and it felt just as great as I thought it would. I guess I’d still be riding if it wasn’t for my knee. Injured it six months after I won when I fell off one of my dad’s horses on a damned trail ride, if you can believe that. He got spooked by a rattlesnake and threw me. I landed square on my knee.”
“That’s some bad luck, huh?” she asked, her sweet eyes blinking at me.
“Sure was. After that, I was just lost, I guess. Been trying to find something else that lights that same fire in me, you know? So far, ain’t nothin’ really presented itself.”
“It’ll happen, Lee,” she said softly, as she reached across the table and grabbed my hand. She was so fucking sweet I almost couldn’t stand it. I certainly wasn’t used to it. Eva had been the opposite of sweet, in fact. Especially towards the end, where all she cared about was how much money I could make for her.
“I suppose it will,” I replied, intertwining her fingers with mine. All of this was so simple, so harmless and innocent, I wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. Sitting across from a woman and talking about dreams and holding hands was as foreign to me as investment banking or something.
But I tell you, it sure did feel good.
“So you didn’t want to follow in your father’s footsteps and take over the family farm?” she asked. It was such an innocent, simple question and yet it was loaded with shrapnel.
“I thought about,” I answered carefully. “But I never really fit in there very well either. I love being outdoors, I love hanging around the horses, but running the farm just seemed like living the same day over and over. I watched my father,” my voice caught in my throat as I thought about him, “give everything he had to that farm. His health, his strength, every ounce of energy and time he could muster went to keeping that farm afloat.”
“It’s hard work, that’s for sure,” she said.
“Sure is. And for what? To succumb to a drought? Or to some corporation or government that wants to tell you what you can or cannot plant? Or some other asshole that wants to make you grow some genetically modified version of real food?”
“You sound bitter, Lee,” she said, softening the blow with that damned soft smile of hers.
“I guess I am. I feel bad for my dad, I guess. He’s gone through a lot to get where he is and where he is really isn’t that spectacular.”
“But it’s good, honest work. Surely that counts for something, right?”
“I guess,” I said, weighing how much I should tell her. “Unfortunately, that’s the last of his worries right now.”
“What do you mean?”
“He just told us he has an inoperable brain tumor. He only has a few months to live, if that.”
“Oh, my god! Lee! That’s so awful!” she squeezed my hand hard, her eyes full of sadness for me. I pulled my hand away and tore my gaze from hers. It was too much to see her looking at me like that.
Somehow, telling her made it all so real.
“Yeah, it sucks,” I muttered.
“Lee? Why are you here then? Why aren’t you there with your family?” Again, with another one of those bomb-filled questions.
I sighed, running over the words in my head and looking back at her. What the hell did I have to lose by telling her? Yeah, it made it real. I hadn’t told a soul yet. But i
t was real. It was the truth. My truth, now. And I had to start owning it at some point, didn’t I?
“The night my parents told us all about the tumor, I learned another unfortunate secret.”
“A secret?”
“Yeah,” I sighed, shaking my head before continuing. “Turns out, my dad isn’t really my dad.”
“What?” her eyes widened.
“My mother apparently had an affair with Ward Hope. I was the result of that.”
“Oh, my god!” she exclaimed.
“Yeah, that was about my reaction, too.”
“Lee, I’m so sorry, wow, that’s some heavy news. You never knew? Why didn’t they tell you?”
“Nope, I never had a clue. And you know, Ward died a few years back. He and his wife, in that terrible car accident, do you remember?”
She nodded, her eyes full of what was certainly pity by now.
“So, yeah, there’s that. I guess I lost two fathers in the space of one night.”
“You haven’t lost your father, Lee,” she said gently. “He’s still here.”
“Yeah, I know. It’s just really hard to deal with right now, you know? I decided to just head out of town for a while, get my head together, and try to make sense of it all.”
“I understand,” she said, her warm fingers squeezing mine.
“You’re the first person I’ve told,” I said.
“Oh!” she looked surprised, but she smiled. “Wow, well I’m honored you opened up to me.”
“It felt good to tell someone. Thank you for listening.”
“Lee, I can’t imagine how hard this must be. I’m here if you need me, okay?”
“Thank you, Lily, that’s real sweet of you. I just might —,”
“Lily!” My ears recoiled at the sheer screeching voice in my ear and I turned to watch as a woman slid into the booth beside Lily and pulled her in for a tight hug.
“Viv, what are you doing here?” Lily asked, shooting a quick apologetic glance my way. The woman released her and then looked directly at me. Her gaze raked across me slowly and her eyes widened in what I easily recognized as approval.
I smirked and tipped my hat.
THE HOPE BROTHERS: The Bad Boys of Sugar Hill Page 33