by Amy Sumida
“Come on,” I whispered and headed hurriedly down the hall. “Neither Conri nor Gradh will be joining us. They're a little busy.”
I started to giggle as I reached Torquil's door, and had to take a moment to get my mirth under control before I knocked. Conri and Gradh. It was about time. They had been making googly eyes at each other for awhile now. But then, that may not have been their first interlude. Maybe they'd always been together, and had just preferred to keep their relationship a secret. I shrugged, it wasn't any of my business if they wanted to keep it to themselves. I'd give them the courtesy of my own silence until they made their relationship public. But it was going to be hard to get the image of Conri's bare butt out of my head. I hoped I'd be able to look him in the eye without blushing.
I found six members of my Guard and told them to pack their bags and meet me in the courtyard. Then I went to pack too. I wasn't sure how long I'd be staying in Unseelie. The thought made my stomach do a somersault. I was seriously headed over to Unseelie with the clear intention of being with Raza. Being with him. Intimately. We had danced around this for so long that the prospect of a culmination made me a little light headed.
With that in mind, I packed some lingerie I'd bought in Ireland. I also packed both fairy gowns and human casual wear. Just in case. I'd done this ambassador gig long enough to learn to always be prepared for any type of activity. Be it storming a fort in HR or attending a ball in Unseelie. Some toiletries and personal items went in the bag too, as well as my iron sword.
Then I changed into some travel clothes; leather pants, leather boots, and a silk tunic long enough to be a dress, if it weren't for those convenient slits up the sides which made horseback riding easier. It gave the look of a dress with the freedom of pants. Then I bound my long hair back in a braid, and strapped on a fairy sword (ultra-light steel instead of iron). The iron sword would remain in my bag until it was needed (hopefully it wouldn't be needed at all), so it wouldn't unsettle the fairies I was with.
I gave my reflection a smile. I looked pretty but also powerful, the perfect combination to attract a dragon.
As I was heading towards the main doors of the castle, I ran into the six guardsmen I'd chosen to join me. We walked out into the courtyard together. Aodh and the other seelie fey were there, all waiting beside their refreshed horses. I nodded to Cat and she shifted into her horse form. We would travel faster if I didn't bother with a carriage. So I called for a saddle and then turned to Aodh.
“King Raza welcomes the opportunity to speak with you,” I informed him with a shaky smile.
“Wonderful,” Aodh exclaimed. Then his eyes narrowed on my face in concern. “Is everything alright with you, Princess? You look a little flushed.”
“I'm perfect,” I tried to smile brighter, but I kept seeing Raza above me, as he had been in my dream. And as he would be soon.
Goddess help me, I was about to do exactly what my Uncle Uisdean had once accused me of. Bed the beast.
Chapter Forty-Eight
I was distracted by thoughts of Raza during the entire trip to Craos-Teine. I should have thanked Tiernan. His words had been harsh, but they were exactly what I'd needed to hear. Tiernan's actions had freed me in so many ways. No more guilt, or worry, or anxiety. I felt like I could breathe again. Like I could live again. And more importantly, I could be happy again. Damn we women really needed our closure. I'd never understood how important it was until Tiernan had left me in limbo. Now I felt like I'd be released from purgatory.
I was ready to slough off the thick layer of sorrow Ewan's death and Tiernan's desertion had laid over me. My father was free of pain now, and soon I would be too. I would miss him, and I would always have a seed of regret in my heart over losing the opportunity to repair our relationship. But I knew, through Ewan's last words and deeds, that he had loved me still, and that was a huge comfort.
I couldn't let that comfort be sullied with heartbreak. Tiernan had decided Danu was more important to him than I, and that was a valid choice. I'm sure several fairies would support him in it. But I couldn't. I needed my lover to put me first. I needed our love to be more important to him than anything else. Otherwise, why bother? I could find pleasure with any man, but I wanted something miraculous. The dream. The fairy tale. I wanted a man to love me more than a goddess.
And Tiernan didn't.
The part that really hurt was, I had loved Tiernan more than Danu. I would have denied her for him. I would have given up nearly anything for our love. Raza included. I thought Tiernan had felt the same. And there's the rub. In my heart, I felt deceived. Tiernan had said so many beautiful things to me. I had been convinced that nothing could come between us. Not Raza, not Keir, not even Danu herself.
Wrong again.
But that pain was fading now. When I had decided to go to Raza, I had decided to believe in him. In us. Raza revered Danu just as much as any fairy. It was the Call of Danu which had made him certain we were meant for each other. But Raza was also just enough of a rebel to take the call further. To go where Danu bid him, and then audaciously love me more than her. That was my dragon. I felt it in my bones. But I wouldn't make the same mistake with him that I had with Tiernan. This time I was getting the truth right up front. Before I committed fully to Raza, I would demand to know where I stood on his totem pole of love. And if it wasn't at the very top, then I would turn around and go home to Twilight.
Armed with a plan, a clear way of determining how to proceed, I felt more confident, and a little anxious. By the time we reached Craos-Teine, I was riled up and ready for Raza. The seelie were exhausted, while I could barely blink, I was so focused. My Guard was somewhere in between; tired from the trip, but on alert for any possible attacks. That was their job. To pay attention, but some of them were paying attention to me as well. Ainsley in particular, kept sending me discerning looks.
I wondered if it was over Tiernan. My Star's Guard knew about our break up. They might even know specifics. They also knew of Raza's interest (so obvious) as well as Killian's (even more obvious). My Guard had to be wondering which man was in the running to replace Tiernan. But Tiernan was like a brother to them. A fellow guardsman. Being in an elite group like theirs, made people close. Would they be upset with me for moving on with Raza? Did it even matter if they were?
Yes, actually, it did. They were a type of extended family for me, and their opinions meant a lot. I dearly hoped they'd be okay with my choice. Supportive would be even better, but that might be too much to ask of them. Honestly though, if they didn't approve of my choice, it wouldn't alter my decision. It would just dampen my happiness a bit.
Once we exited the unseelie jungle, which the Twilight rath connected to, we were able to see a mirrored lake laid out at the base of a soaring mountain. The water's surface reflected the moon, as well as the lights of Craos-Teine, set up high upon the sheer cliff. We had made it to the rath before dark, but night had crept upon us while we were still navigating the jungle. It didn't matter though, we'd be at the castle soon.
We rode our mounts up the steady incline of the road to Craos-Teine in silence, each of us lost to our thoughts. It didn't take long for our small party to reach the spacious rock shelf, which jutted out from the foundation of the castle. Light spilled forth from the windows of the new Unseelie Court, shining off the outer walls. The castle had been built from slabs of carnelian, amber, and citrine, and the reflected light was tinted by the precious stones. The warm, golden glow lit up the cavern which loomed protectively around Craos-Teine. It had been a beacon in the dark, luring me towards it. And now that I was there, I couldn't wait to go inside. I leapt from Cat's back eagerly.
Stable boys ran out to help us, but mine stood aside when Cat simply shifted, her tack and saddle falling from her. The boy chuckled and scooped up the gear, giving me a quick bow before heading back to the stables, which were tucked in beside the castle on the right. The Star's Guard assembled around me, all signs of fatigue gone in an instant. But the seel
ie handed their horses over wearily and slumped after us as if they might fall over at any second. Poor fairies, I knew they should have rested. Fairy stamina was impressive, but we all needed to sleep sometime.
I strode toward the castle like I owned it, and a pair of unseelie fey jumped forward to open doors and ease my passage. The castle had always felt alive to me, from the moment Raza had first brought me here. We'd been alone then, our footsteps falling across the image of the night sky, and echoing off the carved carnelian flames of the walls. Sunlight had streamed through crystal windows to highlight the deserted, but lavish, rooms. So empty, yet there had been a pulse within the bones of the building. Craos-Teine had never been truly abandoned. Raza was its caretaker, and he's not a man who abandons anything he loves.
But Craos-Teine was empty no longer. The halls echoed with voices; laughter, conversations, and the murmurs of flirtation. The happy sounds of a satisfied court. Raza was doing well, consolidating his court as he did his kingdom. The unseelie were blossoming under his rule, coming out of the shadows they'd previously hid among. And I was so stinkin' proud of him. My chin lifted, my mouth spreading in a smile, as I listened to the seelie behind me, remarking on the beauty and splendor of King Raza's Court.
“This way, Your Highness,” a steward directed us towards the rear of the castle. The dining hall.
The streams of sunlight, which reflected everywhere during the day, were replaced by fairy lights at night. They cast a softer halo, which shifted subtly within the gemstone walls, and gave the illusion that the flames of citrine, amber, and carnelian were real. The scent of amber perfumed the air, wafting out from incense burners in the shape of dragon heads. The growling heads protruded from the walls as if they were emerging from the castle itself. Smoke drifted out dragon nostrils and mouths, while incense embers seemed to be flames rising within their throats. I smiled at that. No detail was too small for Raza.
Finally, we were led into the massive dining hall. The doors were opened for us, and our diverse party strode in. But then I froze, standing at the end of a long aisle, set between two lengths of tables, and just stared at the enchanting room. The walls here were lined in lengths of gold silk, with paintings hanging over them in gilded frames. Some of the canvases stretched as long as one of the dining tables. Crystal shards hung from the ceiling in clusters, reflecting the light of the fairy globes set among them. The floor was cinnabar, carved with images of dragons in flight, and covered in places with lengths of gold carpet.
Directly across from me, down that center aisle, the room ended in a series of stone arches. Behind the arches was a passage to the kitchens. I knew this because Raza had once led me through them, from the opposite direction. Above this passage was a loft, accessed by stairs to either side of the arches. Most castles had a high table for the ruling family to dine at. It was generally placed upon a short dais, perhaps three or four steps high. However, the dragons hadn't been content with that paltry platform. Instead, they had placed their high table upon this loft, so that they could dine several feet above their court. Behind the table, the Unseelie Crest, a simple black shield with a silver moon in its center, dominated the wall.
The high table itself was carved from ebony, with dragon claws for feet, and was set with golden dishes and flatware. Behind it, sitting in something more throne than chair, was Raza. He wore the unseelie crown, a thick band of jet topped with a silver crescent moon, tips pointing upward. It somehow made him look more dragon, accentuating the prominent bones of his brow and cheekbones. Raza normally appeared more man than beast (just barely), but with the unseelie crown upon his brow, the scales tipped into the dragon's favor. And yes, that pun was intentional.
Daiyu was seated on Raza's right, looking stunning and dangerous in a crimson gown. Her jade-colored hair flowed back from her face in a complicated design of braids and seashells, and dark kohl lined her eyes, accentuating their exotic tilt. Also at the table, were several other sea fairies, including King Chiwen, AKA Chad, who was sitting on Daiyu's right. To Raza's left, in a slightly less regal looking chair, sat Rayetayah, Raza's son and heir. Between Raza and Raye there was a third throne-chair, this one nearly as grand as Raza's. But it was empty.
Then suddenly, there were two empty thrones.
As soon as Raza saw me, he stood, dislodging the hand Daiyu had just placed upon his shoulder. He smiled brilliantly, his gaze firmly holding mine as he came around the table. My entrance had caused a stir among the unseelie, but Raza's actions stunned them into silence. The whole court watched avidly as their king strode down the steps of the loft eagerly, then stalked up the center aisle, between the lengths of tables, straight to me.
I opened my mouth to speak, but Raza didn't stop coming. He picked me up, an arm about my waist and one beneath my ass, and kissed me soundly. His wings wrapped around us, screening us from the fascinated stares we were getting, and his kiss deepened. Cocooned in Raza's leathery wings, I suddenly felt as if I were alone with him. Safe. I moaned, sliding my arms around his wide shoulders and pulling him closer. His taste filled my mouth, smoke and sugar, and I delved deeper for more of it. Dear gods, how had I resisted him for this long? Raza was intoxicating.
And excited. Very excited.
Raza finally broke our kiss and just stared down at me with his gold, glowing, dragon eyes. They illuminated the shadows cast by his wings, and painted champagne highlights across his pure black skin. I lifted a hand to brush one of the crimson streaks in his hair back behind the curve of his ear. Raza smiled and leaned his forehead to mine, his shoulders relaxing on a long exhale. Then we just stood there, happily breathing each other in, as the court continued to wait. It had taken so much to get us here, to the point where we could simply stand together, holding each other, for all of Fairy to see. We were going to savor it.
Eventually, someone cleared their throat. I think it was Torquil. Raza laughed, his chest shaking my whole body. I pulled back, remembering where we were, and blushed, making him laugh more. But Raza was the only one who saw my embarrassment, and I was strangely okay with that. He started to fold back his wings, but I laid a hand to his chest and stopped him.
“Wait,” I whispered.
Raza's eyes went wide. I knew this was probably not the most appropriate time, but I had rehearsed my speech the whole way there. I had to get it out immediately, before he went on to make any declarations in front of his entire court, which would be damaging to take back. Though the kiss alone had been a bit of a declaration.
“Another kiss?” Raza began to smile.
“No,” I swallowed hard. Okay, here goes nothing- and what an inaccurate saying, by the way. Here goes nothing? More like here goes everything. I took a deep breath and launched into it, “I need to know something before we take this any further. And I want you to think carefully before you answer me, Raza. I need the absolute truth from you.”
“Very well,” Raza went serious. “Whatever secret you wish for me to divulge, I promise to give you the truth of it.”
“Do you love me more than Danu? Enough to defy the Goddess if I asked you to?”
The words hung between us. Raza's hands tightened on me and his eyelids shivered as he took a deep breath. My own heart sped up until I could barely breathe. It felt like my entire future was about to change, depending on his answer. And it was such a simple answer.
“Yes,” he whispered.
“Are you... are you sure?” my voice shook.
“Do you love me that much?” Raza demanded. “Enough to defy Danu herself?”
“Absolutely,” I said without pause.
“Then how could you doubt for one moment, that I would feel any less for you?” Raza laid a gentle kiss on my lips. “I would remake the world for you. To have you by my side, I would face the Sluagh a thousand times. I would drag Heaven down to Earth just to see you smile. Defying a goddess is the least of what I would do for you.”
“Now that was the perfect answer,” I climbed up his hulking bod
y, wrapped my arms around his neck, and kissed him again.
“Is this a jest? Will there be dancing next?” Daiyu's voice carried over to us.
Cat growled.
“Um, Princess,” Aodh interrupted us, laughter lying beneath his words. “Do you want us to just find our own seats?”
“We better see to your guests,” I pulled a few inches away from Raza.
“Our guests,” he corrected and lowered me back to my feet.
His wings whooshed open and with the movement, my heart burst free from sorrow. In fact, I couldn't remember ever being so damn happy. Raza took my hand, his deadly talons curving protectively around my fingers, and we turned together, to face Aodh and his seelie company.
“My apologies,” Raza said to them. “I have been separated from the woman I love for too long. I was a bit overcome.”
“Not at all, Your Majesty,” Aodh bowed and gave Raza a brilliant grin. “Take all the time you need.”
“I believe I am appeased for now,” Raza shot me a smile before looking back to the seelie. “So, allow me to make you welcome in my court. My fellow unseelie,” he said to the rest of the room, “please treat our guests with the greatest respect. They've come to discuss the terms of a treaty with us.”
Heads bowed around the room, and conversation resumed in an excited tone. Truce with the sea fey and the seelie? I'm sure it seemed miraculous to the fairies who had spent hundreds of years at war and then even longer in hostility.
“You and the other representatives shall join us at the high table, as our honored guests,” Raza declared, shocking Aodh and the seelie. “Your guards, as well as Princess Seren's, may join my court.”
Raza looked over to one of the many attendants, and the man nodded. A flurry of motion resulted in fresh table settings and food being brought forth. The seelie soldiers and my Star's Guard were shown to seats, and the rest of Aodh's party followed Raza, Cat, and me up to the high table.