The Skype icon in the taskbar flashed with an incoming call accompanied by its characteristic melody: Boo-BEE-boo, BEE-boo—
Rhea drew in a steadying breath. Single again in 3, 2, and 1 . . . She clicked on the video icon, adjusting the angle of her screen as she reclined on her side.
“Hey Rhea.”
Rhea forced the most insincere smile in the history of faux smiles. “Hi.”
“Um . . .” Adam rubbed the nape of his neck, ducking his head until he was off screen. “Listen. I’m so sorry for how things went during our last call.”
She didn’t want to apologize and wasn’t too keen on accepting his. “Yeah.”
“How are you?”
Small talk. Really, Adam? Oh hell no. “I got the flowers. Why did you need to talk to me?”
Adam popped his head into the frame. “I wanted to apologize. And I was starting to worry you were never going to talk to me again!”
“Why didn’t you reach out to me sooner?”
He frowned. “Oh shit. Rhea. Don’t do this.”
“Don’t do what?”
“I’ve been busy as hell visiting galleries all day, every day, and painting at night ‘til I can’t see straight and my hand is seized in cramps. And besides, I was waiting for you to reach out to me. After all, you were the one who hung up on me. Between a brush stroke and dozing off to sleep I’d check my phone waiting for something—anything—from you, and nothing. Don’t think my silence was me ignoring you. Remember why Sally dumped me? Please don’t do that to me, too!”
Comparing me to an ex? Especially that ex? Okay, ouch. She closed her eyes, fending off tears. He couldn’t have meant it as such a low blow. She rolled onto her back and took a deep breath, exhaling through burning nostrils.
“Doors are starting to open for me. It looks like I’ll be taking my yearly trip early this year.”
“What?” Rhea opened her eyes. “Really?” She turned onto her side. “How early?”
“At the end of March. But . . .” He dropped his gaze. “I’m not gonna go east.”
It was well-known fact in Southern California that everywhere from there was east. “Excuse me?”
“Gary pulled some strings and got me a stall in the Spring Best of the Northwest Art and Fine Craft Show.”
“Where exactly—?”
“Seattle.”
Rhea blinked furiously. “You mean to tell me you’re choosing to go to some art show over coming to visit your parents?” I thought they were your priority. I’d hoped maybe I was.
“I’ll be out there again in a year or so. I promise. But I can’t in good faith miss this opportunity. My parents wouldn’t have wanted me to. And,” he took a deep breath, “neither should you.”
“That’s not fair,” whispered Rhea.
“If life was fair . . .” Adam turned his attention down to something below his camera. The keyboard or perhaps his lap. “The woman of my dreams wouldn’t have chosen to move to Chicago rather than return to California once I found her.”
She ran her hand through her hair. There was no good rebuttal so she opted for a semi-related topic: “Until we figure out some suitable living arrangement . . . Since we’ve both slept with other people, can I at least get a commitment from you?”
“Rhea, I love you so much. It’s just—” He groaned and sighed. “I’m not ready yet, please don’t push me. But I don’t want you screwing other men.” Adam flinched. “Does that make me the worst person ever?”
She thought to say she wouldn’t forgo sex with other men without commitment. Maybe she’d sleep with other women and give him explicit details of those encounters until he couldn’t take it anymore—either from jealousy or longing. “You’re not the worst person ever but only if you afford me the same courtesy.”
“Fair enough. Honest, Rhea. I will be ready someday. Just—”
“Not yet. I understand.” No I don’t. Big fat fucking liar.
“Please know I love you so much. And I miss you.”
Sure you do. Whatever. Rhea muttered, “I miss you more.”
“We’re okay, right?”
“Yeah.” No.
“Hey, um . . . Not to change the subject but Brianna sent me a message through Facebook this morning.”
Rhea’s heart stopped, her body experiencing the sensation of falling into a cold pool on a hot summer day. “Oh?” she squeaked.
“Seriously, what happened between you two?”
“Remember the guy I slept with?”
Adam’s eyes darkened but he said nothing.
“So you do. Um. Apparently she has a crush on him.” And nothing else happened. The end. “And I had no idea, she never said anything about it. Had I known—”
“Oh . . .” interrupted Adam with notes of recognition.
If that was explanation enough to satisfy his curiosity, maybe Brianna hadn’t revealed much to him at all in either the vague Facebook update she’d made last Saturday or in the message she sent to him that morning.
“What do I tell her?” he asked.
Tell her to suck a giant bag of whale dicks? “She kicked me out of her apartment knowing I didn’t have a safe ride home and she lives over thirty miles from here. It was at night, below freezing out—you know what? Tell her whatever the fuck you want, tell her nothing. I don’t give a rat’s ass.”
As it were, Rhea did give a rat’s ass. Many of them. She wanted Adam and Brianna to stop communicating with each other altogether but with how everything was going for her lately, she didn’t dare make that request.
Adam frowned. “Rhea?”
Oh Lord what now? “Yeah?”
“Are you laying down?”
Shit. This can’t be good. “Yeah.”
“Why? Aren’t you feeling good?”
She blew out a sharp puff of air. “No. I haven’t been feeling real well. I stayed home from work the last few days, have a couple more mental health days off before I return.”
Adam put his hand to his forehead, eyes going wide. “Oh. Hell.”
“Yeah. I made mistakes and now I’m paying for them. Hope I won’t pay for them with my job.”
“Rhea, I need to go do something real quick here. Would you maybe close your eyes for a couple minutes?”
She sighed. “Sure.” Rhea shut her eyes. Well, it isn’t the worst Skype ever. Not the best, either. The sad thing was thinking what a relief it would be to end the call. It made her want to cry. Then again, everything did lately.
“Okay,” said Adam. “You can look.”
She opened her eyes. “Oh my God. Are you lying in bed, too?”
He nodded. “I am now.”
And there were the tears for his sweet gesture. “Thank you.” She propped herself on her elbow and reached to touch his face on the screen. No flesh, only the cold reality of cyber friendship.
Adam squinted at his screen. “Hey . . . What’s that?”
“Oh—” she sniffled. “I finally got some ink.” Rhea showed off the full thing as she slowly rotated her arm.
“Is—that—my handwriting?”
Rhea nodded.
He sighed, tears glistening in his eyes. “Next time we’re together, Sunshine? I’m gonna hug you and never let you go.”
Lord only knew when that would be.
Chapter 4: Confrontations Suck Ass
he morning Rhea returned to work was a busy one: First, the text from Cass with an update on her lack of unemployment benefits and the confession she and Jack got into an argument about the job offer he’d accepted.
Then came the text from Adam checking to make sure she was well enough to return to work.
And as she dressed, a notification came through Facebook Messenger from Brianna.
The texts, Rhea immediately replied to. The message from Brianna got deleted as she walked out the door. “Whoops,” she muttered. “Finger slipped.”
“Good morning, Rhea,” the leasing office manager greeted her as he taped a notice to her next door
neighbor’s peephole. He appeared to have little dexterity while donning thick mittens.
“Hi, Steve, how are you?”
“Oh, missing spring an awful lot right now. You?”
“I’m good.” It wasn’t true of course, rather her habitual response to such inquiries. I’m doing better would have been far more accurate but she was sure the question was a pleasantry and nothing more.
“I didn’t see you return to the office for renewing your lease. Please don’t tell me we’re losing you here.”
“Oh. No you aren’t. I’ll come see you when I get back from work.”
“Phew,” Steve exhaled. “Good news for us! Thanks.” He nodded at her. “I’ll see you later?”
“Yep.” Rhea waved to Steve as he stepped into his golf cart and drove on to deliver more unfortunate news to troublesome tenants. She paused at her neighbor’s door to snoop on their notice. It was a reminder to vacate in thirty days.
She felt for them. They rarely spoke to her—she assumed they knew little English—but they always waved or said ‘hello’ in their thick middle-eastern accents whenever they crossed paths. They didn’t smoke and were quiet older people who kept to themselves. God only knows who will replace them. Walking to her car, Rhea prayed they wouldn’t be frat boys—especially if she wasn’t sleeping with other men. She needn’t the temptation of a single, hot neighbor—or more than one of them.
Her workday was pleasant, co-workers greeting her with warm receptions. Dr. Kasick ensured her workload was light and checked with her between his appointments. Although he’d made concessions for her, he quietly informed her that her time off may negatively impact her ninety-day review.
She texted with Adam on her breaks and with Cass at lunch. Right before the end of her shift, a bouquet of red roses arrived addressed to her. The accompanying note from Adam said, simply, I love you. She posted a photo of the bouquet on Facebook with the caption: I love you too, Surfer Boy. It was one of few posts she set to public instead of friends-only in the hopes it would find its way to Mark—not as though he’d care. See? She thought. I’m not alone, either.
Except I still kinda am.
Another notification came through Facebook Messenger from Brianna moments later. She deleted it without opening it.
Rhea returned home, signed a new lease agreement for a twelve-month term and attended her first Zumba class. It left her feeling uncoordinated but energized, overall better for having tried it. She rewarded herself with a quick shower and a dissatisfying Southwestern-style salad for late dinner.
The bathroom scale reminded her of the weight she needed to lose despite the Zumba and salad; she and the scale were no longer on speaking terms until it changed its mind. The logical portion of Rhea’s psyche knew that hinged on her not being as sedentary as she’d been nor eating at fast food restaurants every other meal and ordering some of the least healthy foods they offered.
It was high time she took care of herself even if her social life had effectively gone to hell.
She turned on the television and texted Adam as she plopped onto her sofa: Signed a year-long lease agreement here.
He promptly replied: great
No capitalization, nor punctuation. He wasn’t happy.
Well tough shit; her choosing to remain in Aurora was all his fault.
Rhea sent to him, Took my first Zumba class tonight. You’ll be pleased to know I have the grace of a drunken 3 legged hippo.
His text came a couple minutes later. LOL! I’m sure that’s not true. Show me moves next time we Skype.
She laughed and replied, Nope!
You’re no fun but I still love you.
Rhea forced a smile even though he couldn’t see it; she had difficulty believing anyone could love her. Love you 2 & appreciate it, thx.
Hey Sweets? he sent.
Yes?
Brianna sent me a message today.
Rhea’s eyes narrowed and she scowled. After staring at his text long enough for her eyes to start watering, she replied, What’s she want from you?
She begged me to convince you to talk to her. He followed that with a screen capture of Brianna’s message to him:
“I need 2 talk 2 Rhea but she’s not replying 2 me im desperate 2 reach her can u help”
“Oh God dammit,” groaned Rhea. She sent to Adam: Give me 1 reason I should.
His response was instant: Because you’re a wonderful woman.
“No I’m not,” she snapped at her phone—as if he could hear it?
And don’t argue with me, he added.
Rhea gaped at her phone.
He sent another message without waiting for her to interject: & I know if the shoe was on the other foot you would want the chance to apologize. You were so happy to have her as a friend & you’re so miserable without her. You should at least see what she wants.
She sighed. Whatever, Rhea replied. Fine. But don’t be upset when she screws me again & I let her do it.
Several minutes later, he responded. I love you Rhea. Gonna go paint. Reach out to Brianna & tell me all about it later. Bye!
TTYL, Rhea replied. Love you too. She shoved her phone across her coffee table. “Screw you, stupid technology. You stay there and you think about what you’ve done.” After a few moments, Rhea groaned and snatched it back. “Fuck me.”
She opened a new message to Brianna in Messenger’s app and typed What the hell do you want from me.
Rather than sending it, she back-spaced until the only word remaining was the first. Rhea stared at it until she deleted that, too. Please leave Adam out of this, he doesn’t deserve your drama llamas. She groaned and cleared all the text again. Against my better judgment I’m asking what you want from me.
It would probably come across as having more animosity than intended. Nonetheless, it was the message Rhea sent.
She watched the telltale dots of Brianna preparing a response. They vanished for several minutes and reappeared. This happened multiple times before Rhea’s phone buzzed with Brianna’s incoming message.
I want the chance to apologize to u.
Go ahead, Rhea prompted.
Can u come to my place tomorrow nite?
Rhea burst out laughing; this was one of those infamous ‘fool me once’ scenarios. “Oh fuck no!” Nonetheless she answered with the far more tactful, I’d rather not.
Pls Rhea? I promise this isn’t a trick.
“Oh well then that changes things.” Rhea rolled her eyes. “Pfft.” She sent: If you absolutely insist on making amends there is no way in hell I’m going to your place to do it.
There was a ten-minute lull in conversation. Rhea hoped maybe Brianna changed her mind.
No such luck: A message buzzed through.
R u inviting me to ur place? Cuz ill do it if that’s what it takes.
“Um, I’m thinking no on this one. Unless I could return the favor. See how much you enjoy being kicked out when you’ve done nothing wrong. Of course it still won’t be the same because you won’t be stranded and left outside to freeze to death.” She let her head fall back against the sofa cushions. “I am the biggest goddamn idiot on the face of the planet.”
Fine, she told Brianna. Come to my place tomorrow night. I’m home after 7.
A timid tap on the front door came at 6:59. She took a steadying breath. The sooner I do this, the sooner it’s over and I can move on.
Rhea peered through her peephole.
Brianna stood with her head bowed and shoulders rolled forward. Well, she put on a convincing regretful posture if nothing else. Sighing in defeat, Rhea opened the door. “Brianna.”
“Hey.” Brianna’s eyes remained locked on the ground, her hands kneading her purse handles.
“Come in. Leave your shoes by the door.” Rhea stepped out of Brianna’s way and closed the door after her. God she has a cute little butt. Shut up, heart, you stay the hell out of this. “Have a seat.”
“At the kitchen table, or—?”
“Your ch
oice, I guess.” What difference does it make? It’ll be equally uncomfortable wherever we sit.
“Well, um . . .” Brianna pulled a box of twelve Ferrero Rocher confections from her purse. “I brought these to share with you as a part of my apology. So then kitchen table?”
Rhea wasn’t sure how interested she’d be in eating the chocolates now, or any time in the near future with how her stomach turned into a pretzel whenever thoughts strayed to this so-called apology. “Yeah.”
Brianna took a seat and looked at Rhea expectantly. “I’m sorry.”
On a scale of sincere to utter bullshit, survey says? Raging bullshit. Insincerity off the charts.
“Rhea?”
“What.”
“Please sit. Talk to me? Maybe even go as far as accepting my apology?” Brianna pouted.
Rhea thought she deserved a Nobel Peace Prize for refraining from punching Brianna in the face for that remark. “Why the hell should I?”
“Because—I . . . I apologized.”
“You didn’t accept my apology.”
Brianna reclined in her chair, her eyes wide. “When did you apologize?”
“I think it was one of the last things I said before you threw me out of your apartment.”
“Oh.” She flinched. “Oh, well, I accept your apology now so you can accept mine?”
Rhea gaped. “Are you even kidding me?” she cried. “Do you realize how I felt when you kicked me out? You know I came to your rescue and ended up feeling like the queen of all skanks because I went from Huvie’s bed directly to yours?”
“Hey now in my defense we didn’t technically ever get to my bed—”
“Oh my God.” Rhea’s jaw fell further. “That’s not even my point! Did you know I was so humiliated by what I did in the name of comforting you that I can’t even tell Adam and I don’t keep any secrets from him? So now I get to feel even worse about the whole thing. And you. You want me to accept your apology on account of some token acceptance of mine well after I made it?” Rhea turned away from Brianna, flushed, shaking, breathless. This was so much unlike her, she feared she might have a coronary. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
Smiles By Trials (Rays of Sunshine Book 2) Page 11