by Joan Jonker
‘Ah, now ye’re exaggerating, girl, ’cos they don’t roll off me tongue one after the other. It isn’t easy making up lies, yer know. There’s a bit of headwork attached. Besides, I never tell one after the other. I always leave a few words in between.’
Molly gave another sigh before giving up. She could talk till she was blue in the face, but it wouldn’t have any effect on Nellie. Her mate didn’t see any harm in bending the truth a little, and even Father Kelly couldn’t convince her otherwise, even though he’d been trying for the last twenty-odd years. Giving her six Hail Marys as a penance was no deterrent. He had to admit she had one redeeming feature, though: she never pretended to be holier than thou, and was quite open in confessing to her sins.
The main road was busy, with women going about their shopping, delivery vans in front of some of the shops, and a man sweeping the pavements. ‘It’s a good road for shopping, this is,’ Nellie said. ‘We should come down here more often.’
‘Don’t push yer luck, sunshine, ’cos this is not going to be a regular outing. If yer think I’m coming here again with yer next week, then yer’ve got another think coming. I’ll be glad when we’re back in Scotland Road, where we belong. The shops there and in Walton have suited me for over twenty years, and with the grace of God they’ll suit me for the next twenty.’
Nellie stopped in the middle of a parade of shops. ‘Better not go any further, girl, ’cos the laundry’s in the middle of the next block.’ She didn’t believe they were doing anything wrong; lots of people snooped on their neighbours. ‘I don’t see why we can’t walk in the shop, as bold as brass, and tell Claire we were just passing.’
Molly huffed. ‘And yer don’t think she’d put two and two together, and remember she’d told us what time the man came each morning?’
A two-year-old child could not have looked more innocent than Nellie when she said, ‘Did she, girl? I don’t remember. But then I’ve got a head like a sieve.’ She looked into Molly’s eyes. ‘See, girl, it would be as easy as that.’
‘It would be to someone who was used to telling fibs, sunshine, but as it happens I am not used to it. And yer may not know it, but every time a lie passes your lips, I say a prayer for yer to be forgiven.’
‘That’s real nice of yer, girl, and I appreciate it. But it’s too late for yer to change yer mind and go home now, ’cos there’s a man going into the shop. And he’s very well dressed from what I could see of him. Nice trilby, posh suit, and if I’d have been a bit nearer I could have told yer what colour his shoes were.’
‘Are you pulling my leg, sunshine? ’Cos if yer are I wouldn’t think it was funny. Did yer really see a man like that going into the shop?’
‘Cross my heart, girl, cross me heart. Yer’ll see for yerself when he comes out. I bet he’s the man Claire talks about. He’s very tall, and I’d guess he’s around forty, maybe a few years older.’ Nellie tutted. ‘Yer call me nosy, say ye’re not interested, then ask me what the man’s wearing. I’m sorry I can’t tell yer whether he’s wearing long johns, girl, but perhaps when I get better acquainted with him I’ll find out.’
Molly moved from one foot to the other. ‘He’s a long time, Nellie. It shouldn’t take him this long to pay his money over the counter and collect his laundry.’
‘Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear! We don’t want him to come out too soon, girl, we want him to stand chatting to Claire for a while. The longer he’s there, the more interested he must be. And the more Claire will have to tell us on Friday.’
‘Nellie, if you put yer imagination to good use, yer could write a book. Yer come out with things I would never dream up in a month of Sundays.’
Her friend chuckled. ‘I’d need a dictionary to find the big words, girl, and I’d need you to tell me what they mean. And if I couldn’t use any swear words, then it wouldn’t be me, would it? So it would be a very short book.’
Molly, who had been keeping an eye on the shop in the next block, gave Nellie a dig. ‘Ay, sunshine, is that him?’
‘Yeah, that’s him.’ Nellie was bursting with excitement. ‘Ay, look, he’s turned back to look in the shop, and he’s raised his hat! Ooh, that’s a proper gent for yer.’
‘Oh, dear God,’ Molly groaned, ‘he’s coming this way. What shall we do, Nellie, walk past him?’
‘Just stay where yer are, girl, and pretend we’re talking. Then we can get a good look at him.’ Nellie huffed. ‘For heaven’s sake pull yerself together, girl, and start talking. Tell me what we’re having tonight for our dinner.’
The man passed them without a second glance, and they were able to get a good look at him. When he was out of earshot, Nellie said, ‘Ay, he’s not half good looking.’ Her eyes followed him as he walked briskly on his way. ‘I bet that suit didn’t come from Burton’s. It will have set him back a pretty penny. He’s definitely not short of a bob or two.’
‘Can we make our way back now, sunshine?’ Molly was a nervous wreck in case Claire spotted them. ‘The sooner we’re away from here, the happier I’ll be.’
Nellie linked her arm and they turned to face the way back. ‘I don’t know why yer worry so much, girl, ’cos it’s not good for yer. Yer’ll not live a long and happy life if yer worry over every little thing what’s not worth worrying about.’
‘I felt guilty, ’cos Claire is a friend of ours and I don’t think we should have been spying on her. It’s got nothing to do with us whether a man who comes in the shop talks to her or not. And I’m damn sure that Claire would tell us that if she knew what we’ve been up to.’
‘Ye’re looking at everything the wrong way round, girl, that’s your trouble. Why don’t yer see it from my point of view? Claire is our friend, and because she is, we are taking an interest in her love life. We want to make sure that any man what fancies her is good enough for her.’
‘That’s not why we came down here today, Nellie McDonough, and you know it. We came because ye’re a nosy beggar who likes to know everyone’s business. And I came because I’m daft enough to give in to yer.’
They walked in silence for a short while, and then Molly could feel her friend’s body shaking. ‘What are yer finding so funny, Nellie? ’Cos I don’t think it’s a bit funny. We’re a pair of nosy beggars what should know better, and I’ll tell yer straight I am not feeling very proud of meself.’
‘I don’t feel the least bit guilty, girl, so don’t be harping on it. At least when Claire comes on Friday and talks about the man, we’ll know what he looks like. But that wasn’t why I was having a little laugh with meself.’
‘I know I’m daft for asking, but why were yer laughing then?’
‘I was wondering whether the toff liked women what have a voluptuous body. I know Claire’s beautiful, with the face of an angel, but if I put a pillowcase over me head when we were in bed, he wouldn’t know the difference. And by the time I’d finished with him, he wouldn’t ever be interested in any other woman. And just imagine, girl, if I had a man what was rich, and money was no object, I could lie on the couch all day stuffing meself with custard creams and cream slices.’ She pretended to let out a long sigh. ‘Now, that would be my idea of heaven, and I’m afraid Saint Peter couldn’t match that. I mean, there’s no comparison between a halo and a cream slice from Hanley’s.’
Molly didn’t want to laugh, but she couldn’t help it. She might have been able to suppress it if she could rid her mind of the picture of Nellie lying in bed with a pillowcase over her head. But she wasn’t going to let her mate get away with thinking she was the only one who could raise a laugh, while Molly was a stick-in-the-mud. ‘Nellie McDonough, what am I going to do with yer? Ye’re past the post. Incorrigible.’
Nellie’s eyes slid sideways, to see if her friend looked as though she was serious, or was taking the mickey out of her. Then she thought, oh, sod it, why worry. ‘Oh, I agree with yer, girl. I’m definitely that.’
Molly knew when she was beaten. She should do – it happened every day. ‘I’m glad we
agree on something, sunshine. It doesn’t happen very often. So, all we have to think about now is what to have for dinner tonight.’
‘Don’t bother me with it right now, girl, I’ve got too much on me mind.’ With every step Nellie took, her hips swayed, pushing her mate sideways. And Molly had to hold herself stiff so she wouldn’t be pushed into the gutter and into the path of a car or a bus. But it was no use telling Nellie. As she said, if Mae West could walk like that, why couldn’t she?
‘What have yer got on yer mind, sunshine, apart from what to get in for dinner?’
‘Yer’d be surprised what I’ve got on me mind, girl. I’m not always empty-headed. For instance, right now I’m wondering how Claire can attract a toff with loads of money, when all she’s got going for her is that she’s beautiful. And yer know what they say about beauty being in the eye of the beholder. So, if she can land herself with someone what’s got more money than sense, why couldn’t I?’
‘Is that what ye’re asking yerself, sunshine? Well, if I can stick me oar in, I’d remind yer that Claire is a nice woman, as well as being beautiful.’
‘So, are yer telling me I’m not a nice woman, and I’m as ugly as sin?’
‘Ye’re a lovely woman, sunshine, me very best mate. And ye’re certainly not as ugly as sin. I mean, your George isn’t blind, is he? Yer were beautiful in his eyes – that’s why he married yer.’
Nellie stopped in her tracks. ‘Are you being funny, Molly Bennett?’
‘Of course I’m not being funny. What are yer on about?’
‘Because yer know my feller’s short-sighted. He can’t see a thing without his bleeding glasses.’ Nellie was in her element now she could rile her mate. ‘So what ye’re saying is, the first night I met George, when I was in the Grafton with me mates, and he asked me to dance, he thought I was a blond-haired, blue-eyed beauty? And by the time he’d saved enough money to buy himself a pair of glasses, we were married and he couldn’t get out of it?’
Molly roared. ‘Oh, Nellie, I have never known anyone with such a vivid imagination as you’ve got. What a pity it is that yer don’t know enough big words to write a book.’
‘You know all the big words, girl, so I could tell yer the story and you could write it down. I’d always mug yer if I made any money out of it.’
Molly shook her head so vigorously it nearly fell off. ‘Oh, I don’t think so, sunshine, ’cos I’ve got a sneaking feeling most of the story would take place in your bedroom. I’d be far too embarrassed.’
‘There’d be no need for yer to be embarrassed, girl, ’cos my feller wouldn’t even know yer were there. I told yer, he’s shortsighted.’ Nellie’s tummy was shaking at her thoughts. ‘Mind you, having said that, I couldn’t guarantee he wouldn’t grab hold of yer by mistake, and he’d have yer flat on yer back in the bed before he realised the woman he was wrestling with didn’t have a figure like mine.’
‘I think yer can forget about the book, sunshine, ’cos me conscience wouldn’t let me write down the words yer were saying. I’m not a prude, but I do draw the line at some things. So forget it. Put it right out of yer mind and concentrate on what we can get for dinner for a change.’
‘I had yer going there for a while, didn’t I, girl? And just for the record, my feller’s got perfect eyesight. He said he’s glad he has, ’cos he can see every inch of me, and wallow in the beauty of me voluptuous body.’
‘Nellie, the dinner, if yer don’t mind.’
‘What have yer been up to today, love?’ Jack asked. ‘Have you and Nellie done anything exciting?’
‘Not really.’ Molly knew her husband would think she was crazy if she told him what she’d been up to with Nellie. ‘The most exciting thing we did was go to the butcher’s and the baker’s. And it doesn’t come more exciting than that.’
‘Why don’t you and Auntie Nellie go to the pictures one afternoon?’ Ruthie asked, ‘It’s only sixpence in the stalls at a matinee.’ There was a reason behind the offer she was about to make. ‘Me and me dad would pay for yer between us, wouldn’t we, Dad?’
‘I think yer mam could pay for herself if she really wanted to go to the pictures,’ Jack answered. ‘I know she doesn’t get enough money to throw around, but I’m sure she would have the odd sixpence to spare.’
Molly could tell by her daughter’s face that there was something in the wind. ‘What brought on this bout of generosity, sunshine? It’s usually you trying to cadge off me, so what are yer after?’
‘I’m not after anything, Mam.’ But the girl’s blush told a different story. And after a few seconds, Ruthie decided it was now or never. ‘Yes, I am, Mam, but promise yer won’t bite me head off?’
‘Oh, I can promise I won’t bite yer head off, sunshine, ’cos after eating this big dinner I won’t be hungry. Anyway, whatever it is ye’re after, get it off yer chest and I’ll give it very careful consideration.’
‘Then promise yer won’t shout at me.’
‘Okay, I’ll keep me voice down. So come on, out with it.’
‘Me and Bella were talking to Gordon Corkhill in the street last night, and I told him we were going to the first house pictures one night this week, if yer said we could. And he offered to take us, and pay for us.’
Jack lowered his head and concentrated on spearing a potato with his fork. This was something he’d leave to his wife to sort out.
‘Just Gordon with you and Bella? No other lad?’
‘No, only Gordon. We don’t know any other lads, only the Corkhills and Jeff Mowbray.’
‘Oh, so yer Auntie Nellie must have got it wrong, then?’
Ruthie’s heart sank. ‘Why, what did Auntie Nellie say?’
‘That a boy in the next street, by the name of Johnny Stewart, was sweet on yer, and follows yer everywhere.’
‘How does Auntie Nellie know that?’ Ruthie was indignant. ‘I’m in Bella’s nearly every night, and when I’m not there, we’re only in the street.’ Then she remembered. ‘Oh, we sometimes go window shopping, and there’s nothing wrong with that. There’s not much else for us to do.’
‘So, yer don’t know this Johnny Stewart, then?’
‘Yes, I know him,’ Ruthie said. ‘Me and Bella are sometimes on the same tram as him coming home from work.’ There was no need for all this, the girl was thinking. Why did her Auntie Nellie have to go telling tales? ‘You know Johnny Stewart, Mam. He’s lived in the next street all his life. He’s nearly fifteen, the same age as Gordon, and they’re mates.’
Jack came to the conclusion his daughter needed a bit of help. ‘I know the Stewarts. The father drinks in the corner pub. He’s a nice respectable bloke, doesn’t use bad language and is always polite. Like meself, he’s not a heavy drinker, just the odd pint at the weekend. Johnny works with him.’
Molly grinned across the table at her daughter. ‘That’s a good reference yer dad’s given, sunshine. So in six or seven years’ time, if this Johnny comes asking for yer hand in marriage, then he’s in with a good chance. That is, he stands as much chance as Gordon or Jeff who, so I’m told, are also in the running.’
‘Oh, Mam, don’t be daft. And yer can tell Auntie Nellie she talks too much.’
‘I’ll tell her that tomorrow, sunshine. But right now, I’ll remind you that you are still only fourteen years of age and too young to be going out with boys.’
There was mischief in Ruthie’s eyes. ‘Mam, I have just turned fourteen years and seven months. Which means I’m nearer fifteen than fourteen.’
‘That is still too young, sunshine, so give yerself another year or two before yer start thinking about boyfriends.’
Ruthie thought she might get more sympathy from her father. ‘Dad, how old was me mam when yer first met her?’
Jack was stumped. Should he tell the truth or embroider it a little to suit his wife? But it would be a stupid thing to lie over, and if Molly didn’t like it, he’d soon get round her. ‘Yer mam was only fourteen when I first laid eyes on her. She’d just
left school and came to work in the store room of the factory where I worked. Where I still work, come to that. Anyway, that’s when I first saw her. But I was sixteen and thought meself a man, while she was just a kid as far as I was concerned.’ He gazed across at Molly and knew his wife was looking back to those years, as he was. ‘Then after about eight or nine months, I began to notice how pretty she was. Long blond hair, bright blue eyes, and a figure that promised to be a smasher. And although I was too shy to talk to her, I started to give her a smile. And honest to God I felt like Rudolph Valentino when she smiled back at me. That was the start, pet, and although it was months before I dared ask her out, I knew she was the one for me.’
Ruthie could see it all happening in her mind, and thought it was dead romantic. Then it dawned on her that at that time, her mother would be the same age as she herself was now. ‘Why have yer never told me before how yer came to meet me dad, and how old yer were at the time?’
‘Yer sisters know, but you came along years after them, and I never thought yer’d be interested.’
‘But Mam, ye’re telling me I’m too young, yet yer were only the same age as me when yer started going out with me dad.’
‘Don’t be so quick off the mark, sunshine, until yer’ve heard the whole story.’ Molly nodded to her husband. ‘Go on, love, tell her what yer had to go through before yer were allowed to date me.’
Jack laughed. ‘I had to go through hell, fire and water, pet, and suffer wobbling knees, nerves and attacks of stammering. For yer grandma wasn’t easily won over. She said I could come to the house one night a week for a game of cards, and also on a Sunday to have tea with them. But under no circumstances was I allowed to take her daughter out on her own. Not until yer grandma and granda were satisfied I was fit to court for her.’
Ruthie was round-eyed. ‘Ooh er, I can’t imagine me grandma being so strict.’
‘That’s because I let yer get away with murder, being the baby of the family,’ Molly told her. ‘I was fifteen years and nine months old before I was allowed to walk out with yer dad unaccompanied. And I had to be home at a certain time, whether I liked it or not. If I was ten minutes late I used to shake in me shoes. And don’t forget, yer dad was seventeen then, going on for eighteen.’