by BETH KERY
A vigorous ride on Kar Kalim would clear his head.
Maybe.
There wasn’t a chance in hell.
He reached for the saddle. He heard the stable door open and glanced around in surprise. It was only five thirty in the morning.
She stood just inside the closed door. A mild shock seemed to pass through him and he let go of the saddle without intending to. They just stared at each other, the moment stretching tight.
She’d mostly healed, he realized numbly, his eyes eating up the vision of her. There was still a little fading discoloration from bruising on her right cheek. It only seemed to make her lovelier, somehow emphasizing her finely made, delicate bone structure and the smooth radiance of her skin. She looked the same, but different as well, to his stunned gaze. Her hair had been cut and styled, the color returned to what he’d guess was her natural one—a shining auburn with gold highlights. She’d had it cut in a short, asymmetrical style that highlighted her elegant neck, large eyes, and beautiful face, to say nothing of her nonconformist spirit. The haircut was surprisingly crisp, chic, and professional-looking. It made her look more sophisticated he realized. He was glad to see her newfound maturity, but also saddened a little. He knew what had aged her. She’d changed while away from him, and that in itself was sad.
He thought maybe he’d aged right along with her on that night in July. And in the days since then, he’d sometimes felt ancient.
Using all his will, he resisted the urge to go to her. No matter what he was feeling, he didn’t know what she was experiencing. Watching her walk away had cut him to the bone. He couldn’t watch her do it again with his defenses lowered.
“What are you doing here, Alice?”
“I came for the press conference, and . . .” She swallowed thickly. He’d thought it so many times before; that she was like a wild creature. But this morning was different. Always before, he’d wondered if Alice would show her feral nature by baring her teeth. Today, there was more of a doe-like, skittish quality to her wildness. His heart went out to her. She was vulnerable.
But so was he.
“And?” he asked briskly. Needing something to distract him, he started to take off his gloves. Why didn’t she speak? He looked at her with edgy expectancy.
“I walked through the camp. It seemed so empty,” she said with a shaky smile, waving at the door.
“So you came to see the camp?” he asked bluntly. He felt like a man poised in front of a firing squad with someone who was hesitant about giving the order to fire.
“I came to see you. I . . . I wanted to talk to you.”
“About what?”
“Dylan, why are you making this so hard?”
“Because I don’t know what you’re here to say,” he bit out in frustration.
Their stares held. He perfectly sensed her desperation and vulnerability. She wasn’t any better at this than he was. No, she was worse at it, the truth be told. He knew that about her. The desire to go to her nearly overwhelmed him. But these were steps Alice needed to make on her own, whether they were ones toward him . . . or in the opposite direction.
“I can’t do everything, Alice,” he said, his voice vibrating with emotion. “Some steps, you’ve got to make on your own.”
Steeped in frustration, he hefted Kar Kalim’s saddle and started back toward the stalls.
“Dylan. No . . . wait. Damn it, will you listen to me?”
It was the reemergence of Alice’s characteristic acerbic tone that made him turn to face her, more than anything. He tossed Kar Kalim’s saddle to the floor in irritation.
“What? What do you want to say, Alice? Spit it out, for Christ’s sake.”
She’d hurried after him when he walked away. Five feet was all that separated them now. She made a huffing sound at his challenge, her eyes wide in outrage at his harshness. She opened her mouth, as if to give him some smart-ass retort. He resisted a strong urge to close the distance between them and thrust his tongue between her lips, shut her up in the best way possible . . .
Maybe she caught a sense of how violently chaotic his emotions were at the moment, because her mouth snapped shut.
“I told you that I needed some space. Some time,” she began.
He merely nodded once, waiting, his lungs burning, his muscles clenched tight in order to still his urge to move.
She shut her eyes briefly, as if summoning strength, before she continued.
“I thought a lot about things while I was at Maggie’s. With Kehoe’s sentencing coming up, I thought about what my life would have been like if he’d never entered the picture,” she said hoarsely. “I thought a lot about what he’d cost me: a father and a mother, a loving home, a normal, secure, blessed existence.”
“You’re right. He took all that from you,” Dylan agreed.
He saw her elegant throat contract as she swallowed. She stepped closer. His heartbeat started to pound in his ears.
“He took more than that. He took you,” she said shakily, even though her gaze was steady and fierce. “For twenty years of my life, he took you. I don’t want to let him take anymore, Dylan.”
For a moment, everything narrowed down to her large, entreating eyes, her beautiful, soft mouth, and the roar of his heart in his ears. She isn’t going to run again.
“I don’t want that, either,” he admitted, steeling himself. “But it’s not Kehoe’s choice anymore. It’s yours.”
“I know that. Now. That’s why I’m here. I’m sorry I left. I was just so confused. And I’m sorry that I said I didn’t trust you. I’m sorry I didn’t trust in us. I shouldn’t let people like Sissy or Kehoe rule me, to believe that everything is potentially bad or ugly. Or wrong.” She met his stare, clearly undone by the strength of her emotions. “Because you’re beautiful to me, and it was wrong. It was so wrong of me to turn away from something so right because I was afraid—”
“Alice,” he interrupted, wincing. Screw caution. He started to breech the distance between them.
“No, no let me finish,” she said, sounding almost panicked. She impatiently wiped a single tear from her cheek. It was as if now that the dam had broken on her hesitancy, she was determined to get everything out in a rush. She swallowed thickly and met his stare.
“Remember how I told you that after I had that dream about Alan and me, and how I was running to dinner and he was right behind me? Such a common, mundane memory, and yet when he spoke to me, there was so much love.” Another tear spilled down her cheek. “Or when I had that memory of playing hide-and-seek with Lynn, there was no fear. Nearly every second of my life must have been filled with happiness and trust and love.
“And then when I was here with you, I would think: How am I supposed to ever come to terms with the idea that I once was Addie Durand? I’m so different from her. I don’t trust. I don’t hope beyond the ordinary,” she said shakily, touching her breast. “And everything about you, everything about us, was so extraordinary.”
“Baby,” he muttered gruffly. Her struggle had become unbearable to witness.
“No, it’s okay,” she assured, her face turning luminous. Tears brimmed in her eyes now. “Because that’s when I realized.”
“What?”
“That every night I spent with you, every hour, every minute . . . Addie must have been with me. Because the truth is, I’ve never been so trusting. I’ve never felt so loved, than when I was with you. And you realized that all along, didn’t you? See . . .” She took a step toward him, her expression eager, like she was wild to make him understand. He felt like his heart was breaking a little, seeing her in that moment, bearing witness to her strength and her courage. “With Lynn and with Alan—with my mother and father—I only had those tiny glimpses of what it was like. But with you, I feel it all the time. Addie could trust, so I can. Do you see? Despite everything. Despite Kehoe, and Cunningham and Stout, despite being ripped away from my family and all of this—” She gestured around the stables. “Despite all the years
with Sissy, it’s not too late,” she said, reaching out and placing her hand on his chest.
He winced in pleasure at her simple touch. “If you don’t think it is, I mean,” she added after a moment, studying his face anxiously. “I’m sorry that I hurt you by leaving. I wish I could make you understand, Dylan.”
He reached and grabbed her hand. He pressed his mouth to the back of it. “I understand better than you think,” he said. “I knew you trusted, and I knew at the same time you doubted that trust.”
“I don’t doubt anymore,” she whispered, stepping closer. “That’s why I came.”
He touched her cheek, amazed all over again at how soft she was. How precious. For all those years, he’d sought her, and yet he’d really had no idea just how precious she was. He cradled her jaw.
“The ability to trust is granted only to those who are well loved,” he said gruffly. “That’s why I always said you should trust me. Because I don’t think anyone could be loved as much as I love you.”
He swooped down to capture his name on her tongue. Her taste and texture flooded him. So sweet. So familiar.
Ever new.
Without thinking, reacting purely on instinct, he lifted her in his arms and headed toward the closed office door.
SHE’D started to get used to it before being with Dylan; so many layered, complex, and yet inexplicable feelings mingled with single-minded sexual need. Now as she experienced it again in that moment in the stables, Alice was able to put a name to what had happened to her . . . what still was. It was love and a deep, enduring connection, a bond that was too mysterious to dissect.
Her hands outlined his hard chest and shoulders with lust. With reverence. He tasted so good. She pressed closer to him, so hungry to fill her senses with him. Had she been out of her mind to deprive herself of this? She moved her hips in a tight circle, feeling his arousal mount. He groaned, rough and deep, his arms tightening around her.
He lifted her against him and they began to move. A thrill went through her. She’d always loved his strength and his dominance during lovemaking. Even their first time, here in these stables, he’d positioned and taken her with a single-minded focus that had left her stunned and intensely aroused.
Addicted.
Once they’d entered the office, Dylan tore his mouth from hers in order to slam the door and flip the lock. He turned back to her, his heavy-lidded gaze lowering over her flushed face in a way that made her crane up to taste him again. He placed his hand on her shoulder.
“Maybe we should go up to the house and do this right,” he said, even if the way he was staring at her mouth with a slight snarl on his lips was making it clear it was a halfhearted offer.
She shook her head. “You always do me right. I don’t need candles and violins right now. I just need you,” she said, tearing at the first buttons of his shirt. She unfastened them to just above his bellybutton, shoved open the plackets and pressed her face against his skin, inhaling him. Tasting him. She ran the edge of her teeth along his side and felt his skin roughen with the tip of her tongue.
“You’re always such a greedy little thing,” he growled. She heard the edge in his tone, the evidence of the savage in him that she loved. To show him how accurate he was, she bit at a dense, succulent pectoral muscle and slicked her tongue over a small dark brown nipple, making it stiffen. He groaned and sunk his fingers in her hair. His skin roughened beneath her lips and seeking fingers. Applying a slight pressure on her head, he moved her over his chest and ribs, down onto his ridged abdomen. She lost herself in the glory of him, kissing and licking and using her teeth until she’d hear that growl in his throat, the one that both told her how much he liked her caresses, and was a thrilling warning, too.
Their desire pulsated around them, encapsulating them in their own small world. She was unoffended and eager when he urged her lower, her fingers sinking beneath the waistband of his jeans. He steadied her as she sunk to her knees before him. Then she was jerking at his button fly, her excitement mounting at the sensation of his cock pressing against the denim. Unable to wait, she pressed her hand along the length of it. She moaned, made feverish at the feeling. She sunk her head and clamped the column of it between her upper and lower teeth and twisted her head slightly. He groaned and pressed her head to him tighter. His jeans protected him from the rough edge of her teeth. She stimulated him like that for a moment. He seemed to appreciate the sharp pressure, groaning roughly in pleasure. But like her, he was impatient. He lifted her head and hauled down his jeans and underwear.
Her mouth parted as she watched him fist his erection from below and stroke his rigid length. He looked so beautiful. She made a choked, desperate sound in her throat as his scent pervaded her nose. She craned for him.
“I know, baby,” he rasped, tightening his fingers in her hair into a gentle hold. “I missed you, too.” He stepped forward slightly. Sensing what he wanted, she kept her mouth parted while he pressed the smooth, warm tip of his cock around the circle of her lips. Then he caressed her cheek with it. She looked up at him as he stroked her, helpless in her desire. His nostrils flared slightly as he looked down at her.
“You’re so beautiful,” he said.
“So are you,” she whispered, turning her chin and licking the succulent head of his cock. She waggled her tongue. He let his hand drop. His firm, heavy erection bobbed in the air under the influence of her tongue. She looked up and met his stare while she played with him, licking just the head and making his cock twitch.
He made a rough sound in his throat, palmed his cock and her jaw at once.
“Always pushing it, aren’t you?” he asked thickly. He pushed his cock between her lips, stretching them to make way for his girth. Their gazes held as he slid onto her tongue and slowly filled her mouth. Made bold by the depth and expression of her feelings, she ducked her head forward and took him deep, recovering from the daring stroke as she sucked and pulled her mouth back on his length.
“Jesus,” he groaned when she did it again. “Alice—”
She was a woman on fire, her lust fueled by love. All she wanted to do was show him. Nothing could stop her, especially when she heard his incredulous groans and growls of approval. Sure, she’d made a breakthrough just now by talking honestly about her emotions, but Alice was most at home in the physical realm. This is how she expressed herself with him naturally. It always had been, and would be.
She sunk him deep again, squeezing the base of his cock with her fisted hand, then pulled back, sucking hard on the shaft of his cock. God, he drove her crazy. She popped him out of her mouth, batting gently at his jutting erection with her hand, and then sucked him back into her mouth with greedy abandon.
“You little—”
Suddenly his cock was gone and he was hauling her up, his hands below her bent elbows. His face looked flushed and hard as he pushed her toward the desk. Poor Gordon Schneider. They were about to desecrate the stable manager’s desk for a second time. Dylan jerked her sweater down over her arms, and then her cotton shirt was blinding her as he whipped it off over her head.
“Get your pants off,” he ordered tersely, pulling off his riding boots with haste.
“That’s what I always loved about you,” she said, kicking off her flats. “Once you get in the zone, nothing stops Dylan Fall.”
After a record-breaking strip on both their parts, Dylan pulled her to him. His arms enclosed her. She had a flashing vision of his rigid features descending and then he was kissing the living daylights out of her, his hands moving over her naked body, rediscovering her, taking her breath away. Once Dylan got going, he hit her like a tidal wave every time.
He palmed her buttocks and squeezed them for a moment before he lifted, and plopped her on the edge of the desk.
“It’s been too long, baby,” he said, and she wasn’t sure if he was apologizing for his forceful desperation or just stating the obvious. They were both bursting with need. He stepped between her open thighs and bent her kn
ees toward her shoulders. Grunting once in acute dissatisfaction, he scooted her closer toward the edge of the desk.
“Brace yourself,” he instructed. Glancing down and gauging the angle of things, Alice put her hands behind her on the blotter and tilted her upper body back. She also shifted her pelvis up, tilting her pussy into a slightly upward angle. “That’s right,” he growled, his expression almost angry as he stared between her thighs. He guided his cock to her entrance and thrust. He groaned in mixed agony and pleasure when he sunk into her partially and halted. Alice thrust her hips upward, so desperate for him. It’d been more than a month now since she’d been with him. Her mind was more ready for him than her body was. She whimpered in frustration.
“Shhh,” he soothed, nipping at her mouth, plucking at her lips hungrily. He always melted her with his forceful, greedy, coaxing kisses. She grew so focused on reciprocating that her body relaxed around him as he sawed his hips. He clasped her rib cage in his big hands as he worked his cock into her with gentle but firm deliberation. He cupped a breast and ran his thumb and forefinger over the nipple, caressing her beading flesh. She moaned, feeling her body heat around him. “That’s right,” he said next to her open lips. “Let me in, beautiful girl.”
He flexed his hips. A rough groan tore from his throat. She cried out when he drove all the way into her, two halves of a whole sliding home. She saw his eyes roll back in his head.
“Way too damn long,” he grated out through a clenched jaw.
“I agree,” she whispered, because the sensation of him filling her and throbbing so deep was stealing her voice.
He looked up and met her stare.
“Never again,” he stated simply.
“Never again,” she promised.
He reached around her, his hands at the small of her back and his strong arms squeezing her knees until they touched her shoulders. Her legs were spread and immobilized between their straining bodies. Alice bit her lip at the intensity of the pressure of his piercing cock. He’d put her in a very vulnerable position. She was at his mercy.