by Joss Wood
Cady let out a small laugh and felt his strength flow into her. She could do this. After all, it wasn’t like she had a lot of choice.
“Thanks,” she said, leaving her hand on his wrist. It felt good to touch him again.
“Have you told your parents about the baby?” Beck asked.
Cady sent him an “are you friggin’ insane?” look that he quickly and correctly interpreted. His mouth twitched with amusement. “Let me rephrase that... Are you going to tell them?”
Cady shrugged and sighed. “They’re going to hit the roof. Dad is also up for a promotion, so hearing that I’m pregnant and single will not be well received.” Cady shook her head and made a quick decision. “I don’t think I will, not yet. After all, this baby isn’t going anywhere.”
“Or you can tell them that we’re engaged and that you’re pregnant. They’ll assume it’s mine and we don’t have to correct them.”
“You’d do that for me?”
“Listen, I am one of the few people who know how over the top your parents can be. What’s worse, being engaged and pregnant or single and pregnant?”
When he put it like that, Cady was tempted to agree. But using Beck as an excuse would be like taking the twenty thousand dollars he offered her to walk away from Ballantyne International. It would be taking the easy route. If she was old enough to have sex and get pregnant then she was old enough to be truthful about it.
“Delaying telling my parents is one thing but I can’t flat out lie to them.”
Beck nodded. “Fair enough.”
“Speaking of lying...” Cady wrinkled her nose. “What are we going to do about the engagement?”
“Nothing,” Beck stated, his tone suggesting that she not argue.
“What? Why?”
“If we deny it, we look like we have something to hide. If we confirm it, we step into the scamming-the-public-for-publicity territory and that makes me feel uncomfortable. So we do neither and let people think what they want. They will anyway.”
It went against every instinct she had as a public relations expert. Situations like these had to be managed, steered, directed. “I don’t know if I agree with you, Beck. It could blow up in our faces.”
“Whatever scenario we choose could blow up. By not commentating, confirming or denying, we give ourselves room to move.”
Cady could see that he’d made up his mind and that there was no point in arguing. “Okay, well, then I suggest that you call your family and give them a heads-up.”
“Don’t need to. If I was engaged for real, they’d know about it before the news hit the public space. Would your parents hear about this?”
Cady shook her head. “I very much doubt it. They live an insular life.” She glanced at her watch and seeing the time, told herself she needed to get going. She had a long day ahead of her, and Beck, she was sure, was anxious to get to work. “Okay, we’ll play it by ear. I should go.”
Beck placed his hand on her knee to keep her seated. “It’s been a pretty intense morning but there’s one more issue we need to address.”
There was?
“Okay. What?”
“The fact that every time we’re together we’re only a heartbeat away from stripping each other naked and doing what we always did best.”
Cady looked at him, her mouth half open. What the hell was he talking about? “Beckett, I’m pregnant.”
“I heard. I understood.”
“I’m pregnant, so you can’t want me anymore,” Cady stated, comprehensively confused.
Beck rubbed his hand over his jaw and she saw frustration and annoyance flash in his eyes. “I wish I was that shallow. It would be a lot more convenient. But... I still want you, and I probably always will.”
Cady placed her palms together and rested the edges of her fingers on her mouth. He was being open and honest and she should be, too.
“I feel like it’s wrong to be this attracted to you, that I should have absolutely no interest in the opposite sex, that all my mental focus should be on my baby,” Cady said, confused.
“But it’s not?” Beck demanded.
She shook her head.
He rubbed the back of his neck. “I think that’s a societal expectation, that you should put your life on hold for this child. But the fact is that you are a sexy woman and we’ve always had a combustible chemistry. That doesn’t go away just because you’re pregnant.”
Before she could respond, Beck continued. “Don’t look so worried, Cady. I’m not about to jump you.” He smiled. “Not that I don’t want to...and that’s what I’m trying, with very little finesse, to say. Whatever this craziness is between us, you’re in control of it. I want you but I also understand that your life is crazy at the moment. I know you’re stressed and that you have enough to deal with without me trying to coerce you into bed.”
Cady looked at him, trying to make sense of his words. Beck was putting her needs above his, and her heart thumped at his sensitivity. And his generosity.
“And when you decide that the time is right for us to make love, just say the word,” he added with a small smile.
Cady tipped her head to the side, smiling. “Which particular word is that, Beck?” she teased.
He touched her lower lip with his thumb. “It won’t matter what you say. I’ll see it in your eyes, Cades. I always could and that hasn’t changed.”
The air between them felt charged with electricity, and Cady knew that it would be so easy to step into his arms, to allow him to make toe-curling love to her. But it wasn’t a good idea, and sleeping with him might be another mistake. It had been an emotional, roller-coaster morning and it was smarter, safer, if she stepped back and thought before she acted.
She wanted Beck but damn, there was a high probability that he would be just another in a long line of blunders.
Beck must’ve seen her decision in her eyes because he lowered his thumb and he stepped away. Cady felt disappointed and immediately second-guessed her decision.
She didn’t want to be an adult anymore. It wasn’t half as much fun as they’d told her it would be.
* * *
When Cady made the arrangements for Jaeger’s photo shoot at his home in Park Slope, Brooklyn, she’d expected it would be just her, Jaeger, the stylist and makeup artist, the photographer and his assistant, and maybe Piper and Ty.
She hadn’t expected his siblings to head for Brooklyn after work. Linc and his son, Shaw, arrived first and then Sage arrived and with her, Amy. Thank God they were nearing the end of the shoot because Piper’s apartment was now full to overflowing. Linc found Jaeger’s liquor stash and was handing out drinks while she and the photographer tried to placate the increasingly impatient Jaeger.
When Ty escaped from Sage and bolted across the floor into the picture frame, Jose, the photographer, threw up his hands and eagerly reached for the bottle of red wine Linc left on the mantel. And that, Cady quickly realized, was the end of the shoot.
Her feet ached, her head was on fire and all she wanted to do was go home and have a long, long soak. She was exhausted.
“Cady, these are amazing!”
Cady looked at Sage, who was standing next to Jose looking at the screen of his camera. Judging by Sage’s enthusiasm, the shoot wasn’t a complete bust. Maybe there was a photo or two they could use for the campaign.
Cady walked out of the study and into Piper and Jaeger’s living area and dropped into the corner of the sofa. She really enjoyed the Ballantyne bunch but, God, they were loud! Shaw was chasing a just-walking Ty around the apartment, weaving their way in between adult legs and laughing like loons. Linc was teasing Jaeger about one thing or another and the others were discussing a photography exhibition they’d apparently all seen.
She’d been raised in a quiet, ordered, disciplined
house, and the noise and laughter felt like a red hot poker was being repeatedly jammed in her ear. She just wanted to cry. Pregnancy hormones, she told herself. Perfectly normal.
It was and it wasn’t, Cady admitted, resting her forearm over her eyes. Yeah, she was a hormonal stew but there was more to this melancholia than a little noise and exhaustion. Working with Beck and fighting her attraction to him was taking its toll. They’d spent a lot of time together lately, both at work and at his apartment—using work as an excuse. They always did some work, but they spent more time talking, reconnecting.
And she remembered how much she liked him, how much she simply loved being with him. Since that morning he’d told her that she would have to make the next move, he hadn’t once tried to kiss her but she knew he wanted to.
And, God, how she wanted him. She wanted to feel his muscles bunch and move under his hot skin, taste the slight tang of his manly skin. She wanted to nibble the long cord in his strong neck, run her hands through the light layer of hair on his chest. She wanted to feel his hands on her body, his weight on her as he settled over and into her, listen to him gasp in pleasure, sigh in sleep.
She wanted him. She needed him. She couldn’t have him.
Because she couldn’t afford to forget that he’d once had her heart and broken it, that she’d felt like this about him once before and he’d tossed her out of his life and moved on. If she and Beck slept together, she knew her feelings for him would deepen but his wouldn’t. He didn’t want what she did and she’d be the one to end up hurt. She’d have to pick her beaten and battered heart up from off the floor.
He’d love her, physically, but she knew the day would come when it would end and she had to protect herself. She could not allow herself to fall in love with him. If she did, and he stabbed her heart again, she feared that she would never recover.
No, it was better that she keep her very desperate hands to herself.
“Hey, Cady, where’s Driven?” Linc demanded from across the room.
“Who?” Cady asked, lowering her arm.
“Beck,” Sage explained, taking the spare seat next to her. “Linc and Jay have called him that since he was a kid. Because he works so damn hard.”
The nickname was apt, Cady admitted. Beck did work ridiculously long hours.
“Oh. I don’t know,” she told Linc.
“I’ll call him,” Jaeger said and whipped out his phone. He walked through the front door and into the hallway and laughed. “Hey, we were just talking about you.”
“And don’t you look like a pretty boy with your perfect stubble and styled hair.”
Cady heard Beck’s drawl, and her stomach tightened. She turned her head to look over the back of the couch and sent him a small smile. A frown appeared between Beck’s eyebrows as he took off his coat. “Hi. You okay?”
Cady started to answer but Shaw hit his knees with the force of a tiny tank, so she just nodded. Beck tossed Shaw into the air, and the noise level increased again. Cady thought her head might explode.
The mayhem continued as Jose and his crew said their goodbyes. After they left, Cady sat down again and closed her eyes. She felt Beck’s hand on her shoulder and when she opened her eyes, she saw that he held two pills in his hand and a glass of water. She lifted her eyes to his and shook her head. She couldn’t explain that she couldn’t take anything because of the baby. Not in front of everyone.
“These are safe,” Beck assured her, his voice pitched low enough so that only she could hear him. “Trust me.”
She did. And that was the problem. She couldn’t afford to.
Cady swallowed her pills and turned her head as Piper sat down next to her. “The boys are ordering pizza. Stay and eat with us.”
“I should get home,” Cady said, although she didn’t have the energy to move.
“Stay,” Piper urged her. “It’ll be here in twenty minutes. Have a slice and I’ll order a cab to take you home.”
She could be home within forty-five minutes. A bath, her bed. Bliss. But for now she had to try to be sociable.
She thanked Piper for the invitation and nodded at the gorgeous sapphire on Piper’s ring finger. It was the same ring that Jaeger had held and posed with all afternoon. “It’s a stunning ring.”
“I love it,” Piper said, her voice full of emotion.
“I designed it,” Sage said from across the room. There was pride in her voice and Cady realized that the Ballantynes, for the first time that evening, were all tuned in to the same conversation. “It’s one of my favorite designs,” Sage added.
“It should be since it was a special commission and you charged me through the nose for it,” Jaeger grumbled. “Linc stiffed me on the cost of the stone and you wiped out my bank account with the price of your design.”
Piper laughed at him. “Good thing you live rent free with me. I’d hate to see you homeless and begging. And, as you keep forgetting, Sage said that the design was our engagement present.”
“Is it?” Jaeger’s face brightened. “Cool.”
“Actually, it was my way to thank Piper for taking you off our hands,” Sage teased. “But if you want to pay me, you can.”
“I can’t afford you.” He continued the joke by looking at Linc and raising his eyebrows. “How about giving Piper the sapphire as a thank-you for marrying me, too?”
“I love Piper but not that much,” Linc replied, his tone dry. “Nice try, though.”
Sage raised her eyebrows at Cady. “As you can see, I’m happy to pay the price to be rid of my annoying brothers. Are you interested in making a deal?”
Oh, God, yes, right now. She’d take Beck off her hands, into her hands. She really wanted him in her hands... God knew how much longer she could resist him. A day? An hour? Ten more minutes?
An awkward silence fell over the room, and Cady wondered if her thoughts were on her face. Blushing, she decided the only way to defuse the tension was to crack a joke. “Sure, I’ll take Linc off your hands.” She grinned at Beck’s scowl and nodded at Sage. “Let’s negotiate.”
“Let’s not,” Beck muttered, placing his hand on her shoulder as if to stake his claim.
Sage and Piper exchanged a long look and they both nodded. “Quick and smart,” Sage commented. “We like you. If you stick, I’ll up my offer.”
If she stuck... No chance of that happening.
Eight
An hour later and back in her apartment, south of Jaeger and Piper’s red Victorian in Park Slope, Beck took Cady’s coat and hung it up, trying to suppress the urge to jump her. It had been hell trying to keep his mouth, hands and other parts of his body to himself and he was running out of patience. Tonight he didn’t think he could.
Maybe it had something to do with her fitting into his family, her easy banter with his sister, the way she looked at him across the room. It might be one or all of the above but mostly it was because she was all feminine heat, creamy skin, desire and deliciousness, and he couldn’t go one more night without finding out if she was as good as he remembered. He had to have her.
“Shall I make coffee, Beck? Would you like some?”
Beck turned to face her and noticed that she’d slipped out of her heels, holding them so that they dangled by their ankle straps. Her lipstick was gone and a curl had escaped from the bundled, sexy mess on her head and she looked glad to be home.
Her sexy factor nearly dropped him to the floor.
Beck just stared at her, knowing that his eyes, the look on his face and the rod in his pants would tell her exactly what he wanted, and it sure as hell wasn’t coffee.
Cady’s eyes darkened, her nipples tightened and she shifted her weight from one foot to the other as if trying to escape the heat between her thighs. There was no escape, they had to go there and it was inevitable. It had been since the m
oment he saw her in the hallway at Ballantyne International.
“I’m pregnant, Beck,” she reminded him, as if that had any bearing on the situation.
He shook his head and jammed his hands into the pockets of his suit pants to keep them from reaching for her. “So? I look at you and I stop breathing and all I can think about is getting you into my bed, hearing your moans, slipping inside you to see if you feel as good as I remember.”
“Beck...”
“Tell me that you want me, Cady.” He wasn’t going to move toward her until he heard her say the words.
Cady dropped her shoes to the floor and moved toward him, as graceful as a prima ballerina. She pushed her hand under the lapel of his suit jacket and through his cotton dress shirt, her hand burning his skin. “I’ve thought of you, imagined touching you. You are so hard, Beck. Your chest, your stomach...” Her eyes dropped to the tent in his pants. “Everywhere.”
Cady pushed his jacket off his shoulders and he allowed it to fall down his arms and onto the floor. It was designer but hell, who cared? Cady was touching him and that was all that mattered. She pulled his tie off and undid the button at his neck, and resting her hands on his chest, she rose on her tiptoes and placed a warm, openmouthed kiss at the base of his neck. Beck felt heat and electricity shoot down his spine and tighten his balls.
“Tell me, Cady.”
“I want you, Beck.”
That was what he wanted—no, needed—to hear. He yanked her into him, pressing her breasts against his chest. He dropped his head and at the same time, she lifted her mouth and they fused together, their mouths clashing and tongues dueling. Her tongue swirled around his and memory collided with reality. What they shared now was even better than he remembered. Cady made a sexy sound in her throat, and her fingers dug into his chest.
She tasted of the crisp winter air and longing, and kissing her was both a comforting memory and a fresh pleasure. Her perfume swirled up from her heated skin and her scent, lemongrass and jasmine, took him back to the hot Thailand nights by the sea.