by Anna Kashina
He opened his eyes and turned back to the pile of rocks. It looked so large. If he took this much time with each of the stones, he could never be done in one day. Yet, he now noticed that some of the stones composing it were bigger than others, increasing in size toward the inside of the pile. Did Ayalla place them this way on purpose, so that he would practice on the smaller ones and then progress to the larger size? Peering closer, he realized that the ones in the middle seemed much bigger than something he would ever be able to pick up. His heart raced with worry. Would he be able to dissipate a stone without holding it in his hands first? Could he do it with his eyes open and not be distracted by the stone’s true appearance? He guessed toward the end of this day he would be able to find out all these things, to test his ability to dissipate rocks in every possible way. This was the whole purpose of the exercise, wasn’t it?
If he wanted to get out of this glade before he starved to death, he’d better get started.
He took a deep breath and stepped toward the rock pile.
23
Confrontation
Kara sensed the change of scenery even before the glimpses of empty space through the trees ahead announced that they were approaching the forest hedge. After two weeks of nonstop travel through the dense forest thickets the feeling seemed surreal. By the time they rode out of the tree shade, she felt lightheaded, the pull of the wind on her face so strong that for a moment it seemed as if it was going to carry her away.
She was aware that Ayalla’s way of travel, in a straight line through rapidly parting trees, saved them at least a fortnight, sparing the need to go around and find roads passable for a large group on horseback. The trees not only guided their way, but also seemingly ensured that every campsite had adequate water supply, as well as food reserves in the form of berries, mushrooms, and game, to supplement their food rations. Overall, the trip seemed relaxing, with no dangers to worry about and very little to do except spend day after day in the saddle.
Being part of the command group made a big difference too. She felt painfully aware of the distrust in Seldon’s eyes as he followed her around, but she knew this likely had nothing to do with the Kaddim. The rest of her comrades accepted her back into their ranks with the eagerness that made her feel warm inside. During the time they had been forced to shun her because of her mind link, she came to fear that she would never be able to fit in again. It felt so reassuring to know that she had been so utterly wrong in that regard.
She turned her face into the fresh wave of wind as she rode out of the tree shade, then stopped as the sound of heightened voices up ahead.
She spun around, her heart racing as she took in the scene. Mai and Seldon sat in their saddles facing each other, their flaring nostrils betraying anger. The rest of their group gathered at a distance, clearly reluctant to interfere.
Kara kicked her horse to throw it into gallop, leveling up with Raishan and Egey Bashi at the edge of the front row of spectators.
“What is going on?” she asked.
Raishan glanced away, visibly irritated.
“A difference of opinion, no more,” Egey Bashi said soothingly.
Kara kept her eyes on Raishan, who turned back to her reluctantly.
“I don’t normally feel this way,” Raishan said, “but I almost wish Aghat Mai would have carried out his threat last time they argued.”
Kara frowned. She wasn’t sure what Raishan was referring to, but Egey Bashi’s uneasy look spoke without words. “What threat?”
Raishan glanced away again.
“Aghat Mai indicated he could take Aghat Seldon’s head off for insubordinate behavior,” Egey Bashi said.
“His head?”
“Perhaps,” Raishan said mildly, “Aghat Mai should have threatened another body part instead? I couldn’t help feeling, in the case of Aghat Seldon it just might have been more effective.”
Kara’s eyes widened, but before she could respond to this statement, Mai’s raised voice drew her attention. As she spun around to look at the argument, she saw Mai’s staff swing in an arch that made the air around him whistle. The tip of the weapon came to a perfect standstill to rest against Seldon’s windpipe.
Mai’s Emerald guards drew their weapons with breathtaking synchrony, kicking their horses toward the arguing pair. Kara threw her horse into gallop, covering the short distance just ahead of them to throw herself between the two Diamonds. She saw Mai’s face contort, his eyes flashing murder in the split instant before he registered her identity.
“Mai! What the hell are you doing?” Kara demanded.
His gaze hardened. “Stay out of this.”
“So that you can, what, cut his head off?”
“If warranted.”
Kara turned to Seldon, mesmerized by the mix of anger and fear in the older Diamond’s gaze.
“What did you bloody do, Aghat Seldon?” she snapped.
Seldon pursed his lips. “I merely pointed out certain flaws in Aghat Mai’s chosen course of action – not that it’s any business for an outsider like you.”
Kara quickly glanced at the Majat, all keeping their distance around them. “You should thank your stars that I’m an outsider, Aghat Seldon. I’m the only one here who can interfere on your behalf without formally challenging Aghat Mai’s command.”
“Don’t,” Mai said.
“Why?” She turned to him again, searching past his anger for any signs of reason in his eyes.
Mai’s hand clenched around his staff, his finger dangerously close to the trigger mechanism that released his retractable blades. Kara edged her horse just a bit forward, to be sure he didn’t have a clear shot.
“Why don’t we all dismount?” she said. “And resolve this without weapons involved.”
Mai shrugged. “There’s nothing to bloody resolve.”
“Isn’t there anything Aghat Seldon could do to redeem himself?”
“Keep away from me, for one.”
“But–” Seldon began.
Kara stopped him with a short glance.“I’m sure this could be done. Anything else?”
“Don’t act like a bloody idiot all the time.”
Seldon lifted his chin. “Really, Aghat Mai, I–”
Kara shot up her hand in a warning gesture. “As soon as we camp, we can hold a hearing and determine your punishment, Aghat Seldon. Until then, I strongly suggest you do as Aghat Mai says.”
“But–”
She grasped the collar of his shirt and leaned over in the saddle to bring her face closer to him.
“Listen to what you’re bloody told,” she said, “and you may yet stay alive.”
Seldon watched her for a moment with poorly controlled anger, then receded into his saddle. Kara let out a small sigh as she turned to Mai. “Would that be all right?”
Mai appeared to hesitate.
“You can still kill him if you deem it warranted,” she said soothingly. “Just give this decision another few hours, all right?”
Mai didn’t respond as he flicked his weapon into its sheath and rode away toward the group of Diamonds watching them from a safe distance.
Kara turned her horse around to Seldon, who was sitting very straight, his face set into a stone-hard expression.
“What the hell did you do, Aghat Seldon?” she asked.
The older Diamond shrugged. “Only my duty.”
“Meaning what?”
Seldon heaved a sigh. Kara could swear his hand was trembling, but he steadied it when he saw her gaze flick that way. “Aghat Mai seems to forget he is not the highest authority in the world. All his actions are weighted by the Guild at all times, and if he continues like this they may yet serve as his downfall.”
His cold glance sent a chill down Kara’s spine. She knew he was speaking the truth, and Mai was well aware of it, even if he never factored this into his daily operations. Seldon’s bad report about him could promote an unpleasant inquiry that would cost Mai his command – or worse. This knowledge was
the source of her own fears, even if lately these fears were greatly overshadowed by the more immediate Kaddim threat. Yet, what new could have possibly happened now to promote this kind of an outburst?
“Care to explain that, Aghat Seldon?” she asked.
“No, actually.”
“Even with the knowledge that I have just, very likely, saved your life?”
“I’m not so certain he would have carried through his threat.”
“Do you enjoy playing with fire?”
Seldon shrugged. “What else was I supposed to do? Aghat Mai had purchased thoroughbred lizardbeasts for our entire party!”
Kara frowned. “That’s reasonable, isn’t it? We can’t possibly ride horses through the desert. Lizardbeasts are the only possible means of transportation, once we reach Shayil Yara.”
“Yes, but do you know how much they cost?”
“Would you rather have us walk, Aghat?”
“I’d rather have a discussion about this first. We could have had mixed breeds, for one.”
“It would have cost us speed.”
Seldon shook his head. “You young people just don’t appreciate how hard-earned our Guild’s wealth is.”
“However hard-earned, it would mean nothing if we lose this war.”
Seldon’s nostrils flared again. “You’re just like him, a child who has stuck a hand into a bag of gold. Don’t pretend you know how our Guild operates.”
“I don’t pretend anything, Aghat Seldon. I just suggested that Aghat Mai may have had his reasons. In any case, it’s his decision isn’t it?”
“Yes, it is. And that’s the whole problem here.”
Kara sighed. She was beginning to see the reasons for Mai’s behavior just now. On top of everything he had to deal with, Seldon’s constant insubordination must have been taxing. While she was glad she interfered when she did and prevented the impending violence, she was hoping Seldon could rein in his temper for the duration of the journey. Of course, it was probably too much to hope for.
“Aghat Mai was right,” she said. “You are acting like a bloody idiot. Next time you get into trouble, don’t count on my interference.” She kicked her horse and leveled up with the command group.
The road from the forest outskirts descended in a very shallow incline down to the distant line of the deserts. Built for caravans, it enabled six riders to ride abreast, pulling their party into the compact formation. Kara kept her place between Lance and Raishan, glad for once to be able to ride in the lead and be the first to take in the scenery. She dreaded the conversation that awaited them all at their next campsite, but there was no way around it. For now, at least, all she could do was enjoy the view.
The sea of roofs and tents stretching out of sight made her eyes narrow in disbelief. She always considered caravan outposts to be no more than small settlements, housing just enough people to supply travelers on their road. The place up ahead rivaled the trade city of Jaimir in its size and grandeur. She supposed in an odd way this discrepancy actually made perfect sense. Like any other outpost, Gard’hal was indeed built to supply travelers; it was just that the amount of travelers it saw on a daily basis far exceeded any normal scale. The kingdom of Shayil Yara supplied many things to the northern lands, all of them brought by caravans across the deserts. Every one of these caravans had to stop here on their way north or south.
In Gard’hal, a word loosely translated from the local nomadic language as “desert spring”, the majority of the Majat were expected to stay in wait until their embassy to Queen Rajmella’s court supplied them with the information about the location of the Kaddim Fortress. Mai was leaving Raishan in charge, taking the rest of the Diamonds along. This included Seldon, but now Kara wasn’t sure that was a good idea anymore. Hell, she wasn’t even sure where she and Mai stood after she had confronted him so openly. But she didn’t regret her decision. Mai generally had a very cool head, but if he lost his temper in a major way he could easily do something he’d regret for the rest of his life. She didn’t want to stand aside and let this happen, not when she was the only person in their party who could interfere without putting her life and rank in jeopardy.
A group of men greeted them on the Gard’hal outskirts, leading them to a large area set with enough tents to accommodate their entire group. Up until now Kara kept thinking of their traveling party as very large, even after the Kingsguards stayed behind with Kyth. Now she realized that by local standards a group of three hundred was hardly enough to surprise anyone at all. Many caravans were larger than that. Perhaps this was one of the reasons Mai chose this place for his base, enabling the Majat to remain as inconspicuous as possible.
Mai made no further mention of the conflict with Seldon, even if the way he avoided the older Diamond was very noticeable. He avoided Kara too, and she felt a pang of pain every time he steered clear of her when overseeing the preparations. She kept trailing him while staying out of sight, looking for an opportunity to speak to him alone. It took a while, before she saw him enter a centrally set tent he had designated for command. Kara approached it and exchanged meaningful glances with the Emeralds on guard, then slid inside.
She stopped near the entrance, waiting for her eyes to adjust to the semidarkness after the sunlight outside, blazing bright even at this late afternoon hour. Mai had his back to the door and he showed no awareness of her as he spoke in turn to several of his men and dismissed them one by one. Only when the last of them left the tent did he turn around slowly to face her.
She kept still for a moment, trying to access his reaction, but saw no indication where she stood with him. The pause stretched, until it became too long for her comfort. She heaved a breath, holding her head higher as she approached him and stopped right in front of him.
“I came to apologize,” she said. “I don’t regret interfering, but I am aware that I’ve caused problems by doing it. I’m sorry for that.”
He didn’t respond, watching her. A shadow fell on his face and even now, fully adapted to the dim light, she couldn’t read his expression at all.
“You can still punish him as you see fit,” she went on after a moment. “Feel free to punish me too. I would gladly accept any penance for challenging you openly in front of your men. I just… I didn’t want you to do anything you’d regret.”
His lips twitched. “Did you think I needed your help to keep in control?”
“No.”
“Why step in, then?”
She sighed. “Seldon is one of our Guild’s seniors. It makes him… different from a regular insubordinate warrior.”
“No, it doesn’t.”
“He believes it does.”
Mai heaved a sigh, then turned away abruptly. She waited out another pause, her heart quivering as no response came. She had never seen Mai this way.
“What did Seldon say to you?” she asked.
Mai shrugged, looking at her with hesitation, as if deciding if he should speak. She waited, afraid to move, shivering at the detached expression in his face.
“He said he won’t stand for my decisions,” Mai said at length. “He said he’ll inform the Guild of my incompetence. But the way I reacted had nothing to do with these words, actually. I had far more trouble with his attitude, which could easily cost us our victory when the time comes. One way or another, I must bring him to heel.”
“And you felt threatening his life was the best way to go about it?”
Mai shook his head. “I wasn’t threatening, not for the purpose of controlling him, at least. I just… I came very close to a decision that I could not possibly win this war with him around.”
“You could’ve sent him back to the Guild.”
Mai tossed his head. “He’s here by a decree from the Guild’s seniors. This means, it’s not up to me to exclude him from our party. His death is the only way.”
“Would you have done it if I hadn’t interfered?”
Mai hesitated. “I don’t know.”
She dared a
step closer, but his guarded look warned her from approaching all the way.
“For whatever it’s worth,” she said, “I don’t regret what I did.”
He peered into her face. “Do you think you know better?”
“I know how much you hate killing.”
Mai turned away abruptly, pacing back and forth along the tent. It took him a while to speak again. “This campaign has been bloody hard even without Seldon. Dealing with him on top of all else…” His voice trailed off into silence.
It’s all my fault. I’m the one who is putting Mai under an unbearable stress on top of the burden he’s already carrying. Kara knew she would never say this, not now when Mai was already on the brink of losing control. She wanted to step into his arms, to comfort him, but it wasn’t time for that. She forcibly kept her place.
“I’d like to help,” she said.
Mai stopped his pacing. “You have already. And, you’re right. I didn’t really want Seldon’s blood on my hands. For a moment there I just felt I had no other choice.”
She stepped closer. “So, you aren’t mad at me?”
He looked surprised. “Mad at you?”
“For being insubordinate.”
“You’re not formally under my command, are you?”
She smiled. “I guess there are still some advantages to my position.”
“Some?”
“Many. A lot. Just the fact that I’m allowed to kick some sense into you if you behave like a bastard is worth all else.”
Mai raised his eyebrows. “Did I really behave like a bastard?”
She laughed. “No. You would have noticed if I felt I had to kick some sense into you, I promise.”
Mai grinned. “Do you really think you can?”
“Care to find out, Guildmaster?”
Mai threw a restrained glance at the tent entrance. “I’d love to. But I don’t think my guards would possibly approve.”
“Well, then, I’ll settle for the next best thing.” She reached for him, their embrace fierce, near-violent in its passion. It lasted only moments, but when Kara finally found the strength to draw away from him she felt as if she had just stepped into a better world.