“Do you want to talk about whatever’s bothering you or are you going to punch me if I ask?”
I grunted in response.
“Okay,” he drawled. “Let me know if you change your mind.” He paused for a moment. “Finn, I haven’t seen you this worked up since Christian transferred into SCU.”
He’s not someone I want to talk about right now either.
“I’m fine. It’s just something I need to work out in my head.”
He nodded, but I could tell he was skeptical about my answer. It was half of the truth at least. I wasn’t about to tell him all the fucked up things going on in my head though. Hell, I didn’t even understand it. Nate was my best friend and the guy would do anything for me, but he was also screwing my sister. If Liv got even an inkling of what had happened between me and Cora, no one would be safe. She would either flip out because we were together or she would push even harder for us to be in a relationship, and neither of us was ready for that.
I needed to figure this out on my own. This being the fact that I couldn’t get Cora out of my head, the way her body moved underneath me and how responsive she was to my touch. Thank fuck those memories were starting to come back. I wanted every memory of that night possible.
Fuck, I needed to stop before I got a hard on.
“I’m done eating sand, but if you want to go out for a while longer go ahead. The waves are pretty killer today. I just can’t focus.”
He shook his head and studied me. “Naw, let’s head back to campus. Do you want to come hang out at the house? The girls are going shopping, so it’ll just be us. Maybe we can actually watch a game without them talking in the background.”
I chuckled. He was right, they really enjoyed annoying us any time we decided to turn on a game. It didn’t matter what we watched. I think it was a game to them at this point.
“Sounds like a plan.”
We grabbed our boards and made the fifteen minute drive back to campus. Maybe an afternoon of hanging out with Nate was what I needed to help clear my head. Surfing sure as hell hadn’t helped much.
____
The hot water streamed down my chest and over my back as I climbed under the showerhead, relaxing all my tense muscles for the first time since Cora left my room the other day. It was rare in the frat house that you got the entire bathroom to yourself. I wanted to enjoy it. That was if I could stop all the random thoughts scrambling through my head.
Surfing with Nate yesterday had me thinking back to break. Our summer vacation had been epic. Nate, Cora, my twin sister Olivia, and I had taken a few kick ass road trips. We went places on a whim when we decided where we wanted to go next. The girls wanted to go to New York City to go shopping one weekend, so we packed up and drove. When I decided that I wanted to get a tattoo sleeve, I found someone and we went three states away to get it done. We had even gone to Disney World just to say we went. Then there was the wine tasting in Napa and hiking in Colorado. It was one of the best summers that I’d ever had.
It was our last hurrah. Nate would be starting medical school next year and he would probably spend his summer moving and getting settled in a new city. Olivia would be interviewing for new jobs if she didn’t already have one lined up. My over achieving sister was graduating a year early and she would be moving with Nate wherever he decided to go. They had ended up getting engaged after a roller coaster of a year. I was happy for them though, they just made sense as a couple.
Cora and I still had one year left after they graduated, but it wouldn’t be the same around here without them. Although I had a feeling this year was going to be interesting in its own right. One week in and I’d already woken up with my best friend in my bed. Technically beside it, but that was neither here nor there. We’d been fighting the attraction between us for so long. Honestly, it surprised me that we’d been able to last this long without something happening between us.
I struggled to remember the details. It bugged me because I wanted to know everything. How her skin felt on mine, what she responded to, and I really wished that I could remember how she tasted. Fuck, I was pathetic. Cora and I had only kissed once before on New Year’s Eve and it wasn’t exactly planned. I’d reacted like a complete jackass and told her it could never happen again. God, I remembered how hurt she’d looked that night. I ran a hand down my face as I tried to brush away the memory. Now we had much bigger issues than just kissing and I could lie to myself all I wanted, but it didn’t change the fact that I wanted more.
The problem with Cora was she was the type of girl that I could see myself settling down with. She was smart, and sassy, and I loved being around her. But she was also my sister’s best friend. It was one thing if we screwed up our friendship, but it was another thing completely if I fucked things up between them because we broke up. Olivia would be pissed. Not to mention, I would be pissed off at myself. Olivia, Cora and I grew up together. When Olivia had decided to travel after high school to escape her ex, I leaned on Cora. She understood exactly how I was feeling and we got closer than we’d ever been. Cora had been my connection to home and she missed Olivia as much as I did.
I shook the water out of my eyes and reached for a towel after I turned off the water. Seven a.m. was too early to be having deep theoretical internal debates, especially after a night of drinking at Nate’s. It didn’t matter what had happened between me and Cora, it was done. The only thing left to do was see if Cora and I could be normal around one another. Maybe the best thing to do was ignore that it even happened.
I groaned. The last thing I wanted was to ignore what happened, but I would leave this one up to her. She would have to decide where we would go from here. It had been fun as hell teasing her in the diner though. I might have to do that again.
____
Our group of friends met up at noon like normal. We had lunch in the Student Union at least once a week and it was nice getting back into that routine. Our group mainly consisted of me, Nate, a couple of our fraternity brothers, their girlfriends, Olivia and Cora. I was already sitting down when Cora and Olivia walked up carrying their trays. Nate scooted in and Olivia slid in next to him. That left the only remaining seat next to me. Cora eyed it skeptically before actually sitting down.
“I’m not going to bite, Princess.” I leaned in closer and whispered in her ear. “Too hard.”
She closed her eyes and I smirked.
“Do you have an off button? Seriously, do you ever stop?”
She picked up her soda and sucked on her straw. Her full pouty lips brought back a memory of her mouth wrapped around my cock.
“Not normally. I have incredible stamina.” Cora choked on her drink and I pounded my hand on her back. “Easy there, Princess.”
“Oh my gosh. It’s too early in the day to deal with you.”
I cocked my head and gave her a lopsided smile. “Am I really that bad?”
“I don’t know.” She looked over at Olivia and Nate. They weren’t paying attention to us because they were lost in their conversation. If it wasn’t so sweet, it would make me sick to see how in love they were. Cora lowered her voice. “You’re hell bent on making it obvious to everyone that we’ve done stuff.”
“They’re wrapped up in their own little world, Cora. They couldn’t care less about what we’re discussing.” I took a deep breath. “We joke about everything. It’s going to be weird if we can’t ever mention it.”
She played with the lid of her cup. “I guess that’s true. It’s just…weird.”
“Weird that we fucked or weird that you want to do it again?”
A grin covered my face and she smacked my shoulder as she fought back a smile.
“Don’t be an ass.”
I pretended that her hit actually hurt and smirked at her. “We’re going to be fine. I’ll keep my hands to myself and you can enjoy your lunch. Now say something snarky to me or they will start suspecting something.”
“How about I just dump my drink on your head?” she asked swee
tly.
“There’s my girl.”
She took a bite of her sandwich and narrowed her eyes at me.
“Step too far?” I asked grinning.
“You think?”
She finished her sandwich while I watched. My lunch was long gone and it was time for dessert. My damn sweet tooth was going to get me in trouble one of these days. I opened up the Starburst I’d bought, pulled out the pink ones and pushed them over to her without saying anything. We normally fought over who got what color, but she seemed surprised that I gave them to her willingly.
“Finn—”
“I’ve got class in fifteen minutes,” I said, pushing back from the table. “I’ll see you guys later.”
As I walked away, Cora stared at the five pink Starbursts sitting in her palm. The expression on her face was beautiful, but I couldn’t read a fucking thing in it.
After the first week of school, Hannah and I decided to start a once a week movie and junk food night. It gave me much needed girl time and both of us some relief from the stress of school work. I convinced Olivia to leave Nate and join us so we could all lay around stuffing ourselves silly on junk food and stare at hot movie stars. It was nice to actually spend some time with Olivia. Plus I wanted to get to know Hannah better, so it was a win-win for me. Getting along with girls wasn’t easy for me normally because I was loud, brash and pretty. The combination wasn’t a good one apparently. Olivia told me that most girls were intimidated by my personality, but I still didn’t understand why. Maybe it was the fact that I spoke my mind without thinking most of the time, or that I didn’t care what people thought.
It wasn’t that I didn’t have girlfriends, I did, but they weren’t best friends, more acquaintances than anything. They weren’t people I would tell everything going on in my life. Well, that was a touchy subject right now because obviously I couldn’t tell anyone about my situation with Finn. But I craved to have someone there to gossip with about everything going on in my life. He had always been a great friend, someone that I loved flirting with, but now things were different between us, and I really needed someone to talk to about it with.
My phone chimed during the movie. Olivia and Hannah threw popcorn at me and told me to turn it off. I laughed and reached for my phone so I could do just that, but seeing Finn’s name flash across my screen had my heart racing. Seriously, it was like I had a high school crush the way it was pounding in my chest. I was acting like an idiot and I needed to pull it together before the girls noticed.
It had just been sex, nothing more, I reminded myself.
Maybe if I kept telling myself that it would be true.
I slid my finger across the screen and read the text.
I’m thinking about that night.
Yeah. That wasn’t going to help me get my mind off of things. What was I supposed to say back to him? That I couldn’t stop thinking about it either? That I had been wracking my brain trying to remember every second? Things were hazy at best, but that didn’t stop me from trying to wring every detail possible out of my muddled mind.
“Is everything okay, Cora?” Hannah asked.
I set my phone down quickly.
“Yeah, it’s nothing important.”
If I didn’t think Finn would get mad at me, I probably would have come clean with Olivia right then. She had seemed excited last year when things looked like Finn and I might get serious. I reached for the bowl of candy we had in the middle of the beds. There was nothing quite like eating your feelings when boys complicated your life.
I needed to get out there and start dating again. The thought still terrified me, but I had to do something. This thing between me and Finn had to end. One, or both of us, would only get hurt in the long run, not to mention what it would do to Olivia if we dated then broke up. She might think she needed to choose between us, and I would lose her and Finn because she couldn’t choose me over her own brother. I couldn’t risk my friendships with either one of them.
I swiped open my phone again and deleted the text.
It hurt more than I thought it would. Here I was thinking about a relationship when we had only slept together. Once.
I was such an idiot.
Olivia looked over at me and smiled. I tried to smile back, but I’m sure it looked forced. She frowned, but I shook my head once, not willing to go there. Not yet at least. She wouldn’t pry because she knew when I was ready I would talk to her about it. My best friend was a freaking saint some days. The only problem was I didn’t think I would ever be ready to talk to her about this.
____
The next Friday night, I was treated to several of the guys cat-calling at me as I walked into the house. Not that my ego needed it, but I enjoyed the attention all the same. I had taken the time to curl my long blonde hair and pick out the perfect outfit, so it was nice to see that the effort was appreciated. My hair hung in perfect beach waves down my back, and my black skinny jeans were so tight I’d opted not to wear panties so I didn’t have panty lines. I’d thrown on my favorite black, strappy heel and a flowy, low cut top to finish off the look. I felt hot.
“Damn Cora,” one of the frat brothers called out. It might have been Craig. I wasn’t paying attention, but I preened and they all laughed. Some of the girls in the room gave me the stink eye, but I didn’t care. Fuck them. They could be jealous all they wanted. I loved being the center of attention and if they weren’t getting it, that was on them. It wasn’t hard to make these guys notice you if you put the smallest bit of effort into flirting.
Olivia walked up behind me and pushed me towards the kitchen. She shook her head and I giggled. It was going to be that kind of night. Within seconds of walking into the kitchen, I had a beer in one hand a shot in the other. The alcohol coursed through my system quickly and I was enjoying the cozy little buzz I had going. One of our other friends, Chance, was standing beside me in the kitchen. We had always been friendly, but I’d never been interested in him. At least I’d never been before I needed to take my mind off of a certain someone. We flirted a little while I finished up my drink. I couldn’t shake the feeling that someone was watching me. Two guesses of who that someone might be.
Chance grinned at me when I grabbed his hand, leading him to the makeshift dance floor. It was just the formal living room, but the guys made sure to lay down tarps and the dj was set up in here. My hips ground into his as we moved to the beat. A light sheen of sweat covered my body as I started dancing with someone new. Chance knew how I was and I noticed he had also grabbed a redhead to grind on without hesitation. He seemed okay with the status quo. Hands travelled up and down my body, but they never reached for anywhere inappropriate. The brothers and I had an agreement of sorts, I danced, drank, and flirted with them, and they never pushed further than I wanted to go. Sure, the occasional hookup happened, but they all knew the score going in. It was just sex and they couldn’t get attached because I sure as hell wasn’t about to. A thought flashed through my mind that maybe that’s what Finn thought had happened between us. Other than that one text, I hadn’t heard from him since lunch the other day and that was unusual.
I tapped Chance on the shoulder and motioned that I was heading back to the kitchen and he nodded. When we walked in, Finn was leaning back against the counter, looking way too sexy in his worn jeans and grey Henley shirt. The sleeves were tight against his muscled biceps and I had to make a conscious effort not to drool. He smirked at me when he saw my eyes traveling up and down his body. His eyes seemed to be taking me in too.
Chance handed me a glass of beer and I shot him a grateful smile. It surprised me a little that he had followed me. The redhead he was dancing with had seemed pretty into him, but maybe he wasn’t digging her. He leaned in and wrapped his arm around my waist. Chance was one of those guys that knew a girl had needs and that for me, they didn’t include wanting a relationship. I’d been there and it had ended in the worst way possible. If I could help it, I would never be put in that position ever again. I leaned
against him, pressing my breasts into his chest, and ran my fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. Finn scowled and pushed off the countertop.
“Cora, do you ever go a fucking weekend without getting laid?” he growled.
What the hell? Where did that come from?
“Not if I can help it,” I said, ignoring his pissy tone.
Finn’s hands clenched into fists and for a second I thought he might hit Chance. He was seriously upset with me and that in itself was confusing. I watched his retreating back and debated following him, but he was the one that had been avoiding me. Normally I would follow him and bitch until he told me what was going on. I just wasn’t in the mood for the drama tonight.
“Let’s go dance some more,” I said, dragging Chance behind me. If Finn wanted to act like a jealous asshole, I would give him something to be jealous about.
What the hell was wrong with me?
I stared at Cora’s retreating back as she drug Chance behind her like a puppy. The sight just pissed me off even more. I downed the cup of beer in my hand and went off to find something a little stronger.
“Finnius!”
Awesome. Olivia was drunk. I prayed that Nate was keeping an eye out for my sister. If it was left up to me, someone would end up getting punched tonight. Luckily, Nate was sitting on the kitchen counter with Olivia in front of him. That bastard looked so much happier now that he had her in his life. To be honest, my sister was finally starting to act like herself again and it was a huge relief. After the past few miserable years she deserved some good in her life.
I grabbed a bottle of whiskey off the counter and made my way over to my sister.
“What’s up, Liv?”
My voice slurred a little, but hopefully not enough to giveaway how much I had actually drank. I unscrewed the lid and took a huge gulp of the Jameson. It burned all the way down, causing me to make a face.
Waiting to Fall: Book Two of the Waiting Duet Page 2