“Flattery will go far tonight.” He laughs, explaining further once he sees my confusion. “That was Will’s fortune the night we went to Scores. He opened a cookie at Chinese Garden right before we came upstairs to meet you and Clarke.”
“I see.” I unhook my fingers from his once Connor, and his old friend struts down the center aisle toward us. “Try to behave yourself,” I say under my breath. “That’s my boss.”
He glances up from my face. His eyes narrow as he looks at Connor and the man next to him.
The men stop in front of us. Connor smiles. His friend has his lips pulled together so tight his jaw could snap from the tension.
Connor studies Ethan’s face, as if he recognizes him, which is no surprise. “I know you,” he says. “Waters, right? I haven’t seen you in years. What’s it been? Like nine or ten years.”
Ethan’s entire body tenses up. He shoves his hands into his jeans pockets, not even bothering to offer his hand to Connor. “Yeah,” Ethan says.
How do they know each other?
Connor’s gaze travels between Ethan and me, and he eventually lands on my face. “You two together?”
I nod. “Ethan is here to pick me up.”
Connor smirks. “I didn’t know you were down with that.” His words confuse the fuck out of me. “How much are you looking to cop?”
I narrow my eyes at Connor, confused by his unusual question. That’s when I realize he means drugs.
What the fuck?
“We’re not,” Ethan says before I can answer.
The Italian man adjusts the black duffel bag that Connor brought back with him earlier and excuses himself. A beat passes between all of us, where the man slips out the door, and Ethan and I stand awkwardly in front of Connor.
Connor peeks up at the clock on the wall behind the counter. “You can leave early. I will close up tonight.”
I flash a closed-mouth smile at Connor and reach behind the counter for my purse. “Thanks. Have a good night.”
“You, too.” Connor stretches his hand out in front of him for Ethan to shake. “Waters. You know where I am. Come see me. Anytime.”
Ethan leads me outside with his hand on my back, his nervous energy shaking through me. I live a few blocks over from the record store, so we make a left toward my apartment without speaking. Where do I begin? I have so many questions.
“Are you hungry?” Ethan asks me, ending the silence between us.
“No, Connor ordered us a pizza. Are you?”
He shakes his head. “The only thing I’m hungry for is your pussy.”
I smile, but it quickly fades. Ethan notices and snaps his head away from me.
“What was all that about, E? How do you know Connor? Why did he think you would want to buy drugs?”
He looks down at his feet, his gaze moving upward when a man in a Flyers T-shirt says to his friend, “I think that’s Ethan Waters.”
Ethan acknowledges them with a feigned smile and a nod. The boys don’t stop us. We keep moving down Market Street. Ethan has a strained expression on his face that gives me the chills, his disposition so cold and gloomy that I can’t stop wondering what happened back at the store.
“Answer me, E,” I demand. The tone of my voice catches his attention. “Why do you know Connor?”
“We were friends a long time ago.”
“Connor is a drug dealer.”
He shrugs. “I’m a hockey player.”
“Do not do that to me. Please tell me the truth. You damn well know that I am working at Old City on a case. Do not be cryptic with me. I need answers.”
“That part of my life is in the past.” He grabs my hand when we cross the street at the stoplight, bringing me close to his side. “Let’s leave it at that.”
“No,” I say loud enough to garner the attention of a couple passing us. “That’s not good enough. You owe me some answers.”
“Keep it down before I stuff my cock in your mouth to shut you up,” he growls, his voice deep and low.
His entire body goes rigid, reverting to the asshole that returned to me ten years ago. Just when I was starting to get back E. I don’t like his alter ego.
Once we reach my building, he drags me into the dim hallway and up the three flights of stairs. Not until we reach my place does Ethan release his grip on my hand. I remove the keys from my purse and open the door for us. Within seconds of shutting it behind us, Ethan has me pinned up against the wall with his big body.
“Will isn’t coming home tonight,” he tells me.
“I know. He texted me earlier.”
Ethan dips down to breath against my neck, leaving a trail of hot breath along my skin as he fumbles with his zipper. “I meant what I said about shoving my cock in your mouth. I want those pretty lips of yours wrapped around me, taking every inch of me. Sucking down my cum.”
“Why are you acting like this? Fucking answer me!” I yell so loud it’s as if something inside me has come undone. “I am so sick of this shit. You can’t go into that dark place you hide on me. Years ago, you did the same thing, pushing me away until I hated your guts. Not every problem in life can be solved with sex. Fucking me until I can’t walk or gagging me with your cock is not going to fix whatever is broken inside you. Talk to me!”
“Why?” He presses his palms to the wall on each side of my head. “So you can write a story about me? My life is not for sale. It’s not something I want on display for the entire world.”
My heart aches.
“You don’t trust me?” I stare into his eyes to gauge his reaction. “I thought by now you would know that I can keep a secret. I would never use anything you tell me, personal or professional, to sell papers.”
He closes his eyes and sighs. “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for being an asshole or sorry because you won’t tell me?”
He opens his eyes. They hold so much sadness that tears well up in my bottom lids.
“For being an asshole.”
“Please, E.”
He grazes my cheek with his thumb and catches a fallen tear. “I’m sorry, Mia. For everything. I didn’t want to leave you behind. But I didn’t have a choice. My dad forced me to go back to Boston.”
“Were you at hockey camp, or was that another lie?”
“A lie,” he admits. “I went to live my grandmother. I never went to hockey camp.”
I grip his shirt between my fingers and pull him tight, close enough that our lips almost touch. “Why did you leave? I want to know everything or—”
“Or what?” He brushes his lips along mine, slowly.
The heat from his breath hardens my nipples, the tiny buds aching for his mouth, his hands, begging to be touched. I’m powerless when it comes to Ethan. And he knows it.
“Or we can’t do this anymore,” I tell him.
He opens his mouth just enough to stick out the tip of his tongue and sweeps it across my bottom lip. “Give me what I want, and I will give you what you want.”
His husky voice sends chills down my spine. “What do you want?” I play dumb, and that earns me a cocky smirk.
“Get on your knees,” he orders, taking a step back from me, leaving me wanting more.
I do as he says because I want everything Ethan has to offer—his cock and the truth.
“Take out my cock,” he growls.
As I unzip his pants, he leans forward and presses his left hand to the wall, with his gaze fixed on me. His green eyes darken and grow wider as I take him in my hand. Looking up at him, I stroke his shaft and wet my lips.
Ethan tilts his head back and grunts. “Suck it.”
My pussy is soaking wet, my juices dangerously close to sliding down my inner thigh. “I suck. You talk. That’s the deal.”
He smirks. “Fine. No matter what I say, don’t stop. Got it? And no fucking pity party or tears.”
In answer, I flatten my tongue against his shaft and lick my way up to the tip. I give him a few more licks, before shoving him in my
mouth, ripping another feral sound from him.
A minute ticks by before he says, “I had an addiction. That’s how I know Connor. He was my dealer.”
Ethan tightens his grip on my hair and pushes his cock into the back of my throat, forcing me to take all of him, causing me to gag. Tears stream down my eyes from the sheer force of his movements. I gasp for air and remind myself to breathe through my nose. As long as he keeps talking, I don’t care.
“The hospital prescribed painkillers to dull the pain from the accident. I was so fucked up in the head after Erik died…” His voice trails off, and when I peek up at him, his eyes are closed. He tugs at my hair, and I pick up the pace. Now that I have a good rhythm, I work his shaft with one hand and massage his balls with the other, working in harmony with my mouth.
“Fuck,” he hisses. “My little lamb sure knows how to suck a cock.” Another beat passes, with nothing more than the noises that escape both of our lips. Then, he continues, “I was addicted to opiates. Anything I could get my hands on. That’s why my dad moved us here. He thought it would help me get my act together. But I sought out the stoners at school. They hooked me up with Connor, who was just a street dealer back then.”
Ethan was on drugs. My Ethan. Between sucking and jerking him off, I try to wrap my head around this revelation. What does it have to do with him running away without a second thought?
As if answering the question in my head, he chokes out, “Back in Boston, I went through a detox program, one that no one ever found out about. I…”
He cups the back of my head with both hands. His cock pulses, his body trembling as he comes in my mouth. Ethan takes a step back and loosens his hold on me. After I swallow, I lick the tip one last time to get every drop.
“Damn, baby,” he whispers, out of breath. “Fuck, that was…” He’s at a loss for words. So am I after everything he just told me about his drug addiction.
Ethan grips my shoulders and pulls me up to my feet. My thighs bang together when I try to stand on my own. I lean my back against the front door and try to catch my breath.
“Thank you for telling me. Your secret is safe with me.” I move my hand over my heart and lock eyes with Ethan. “I promise.”
He bends down to kiss my forehead and touches my cheek with his fingers. “I know. But this also means you can’t write a story about them. If Connor ever found out that you had anything to do with it, he would expose me and kill you. The Italians and the Irish are not the kind of people you fuck with. Understood?”
“But the story could make my career.”
“It would ruin mine,” he spits back. “I’m not into that shit anymore. I got clean a long time ago.” He bites the inside of his cheek, his nerves showing. “My career is not even my biggest concern right now; it’s you and your safety. They are dangerous men, Mia. A little lamb like you, so gentle and pure, doesn’t stand a chance against wolves like them.”
Once the realization hits me, I nod. He’s right. I saw the look in the Italian man’s eyes that said, “I’ve killed a lot of men.” He had a cold, hard, calculated stare that scared me to death.
“I’ll back off,” I say, trying to hold back my tears. “For you. For us.”
“Thank you.” Ethan kisses me on the forehead. “It’s hard enough taking care of you without another added complication. You are such a stubborn woman, Mia.”
I peek up at him with a smile. “It’s part of my winning charm.”
24
Ethan
For the first time in my life, I feel relieved. I told Mia about Erik, the accident, and now my addiction. And the world didn’t end. Nothing happened. After taking Mia twice in her bed, she passed out from all the orgasms I gave her. Too bad I wasn’t tired. It’s kind of hard to sleep after confessing my darkest secrets to Mia over one of the best blowjobs I’ve ever had.
Mia rolls over and onto my chest. I sit up, with my back against the headboard, and hook my arm around her. Her chest rises and falls with each breath she takes. In sleep, she’s even more beautiful. I push a strand of hair from her cheek and smile.
My entire body is still on fire from the adrenaline that coursed through my veins all night. Lying next to Mia, I touch her hair as I watch her sleep. This simple gesture produces a feeling inside the pit of my stomach, an ache that burns like acid. I bared myself to Mia, something I have never done with anyone. Not even Will.
My eyes flutter, slowly closing as I continue playing with Mia’s hair. I fight sleep, even though I need it. The image of Mia in my arms, curled about against my naked body, burns into my brain. A permanent memory. One that I will never forget. Just like the darkness, sleep wins out. I stop fighting exhaustion, and myself, giving in to the dream of us. Of Mia and me.
* * *
Thump, thump, thump.
The sound wakes me from my slumber, piercing into my skull. When I open my eyes, the first thing I see is…Will. Fuck. He’s hovering over my side of the bed with his hand on the headboard. Will was the cause of the noise.
I rub the sleep from my eyes and sit up. “What are you doing?”
He grinds his teeth together, his face twisted in anger. “I should ask you the same thing, seeing as you are in my sister’s bed naked. And she’s naked, too.”
Mia pulls the sheet up to her chin and peels herself from my chest, leaving me with nothing to cover myself. Not like I care about me.
She holds out her hand, her eyes wide with surprise. “Will, don’t freak out, okay? Just give us a second to explain.”
“Explain what? How you two are sneaking around with each other behind my back?” He folds his arms over his chest. His jaw clenches in anger. “Yeah, I would love to hear how my best friend ended up in my little sister’s bed.” Will sits at the edge of the bed, his weight dipping the mattress on my side. “I’m sure it’s a great fucking story. Let’s hear it.”
Mia lets out an exaggerated groan, blowing her hair in her face. “Don’t be an ass, Will. Please. It’s too early in the morning to get into a fight.”
“How long has this been going on?” Will looks at me and shakes his head. “I flat out asked you if you liked my sister, and you said no, even though I knew you were fucking lying to my face. Of all people, I trusted you the most with Mia.”
Shifting my weight, I roll over to grab my boxer briefs from the floor and swing my feet off the side of the bed to put them on. I’d rather not argue with Will naked.
“I never intended for anything to happen with us,” I tell Will. “It just did.”
Will covers his face with his hands and sighs. “I don’t even know what to say. To either of you. I am so fucking disgusted.”
“At least he’s not some random guy I picked up at a bar,” Mia says. “I have known Ethan for years. I don’t see why it’s such a big deal.”
“Because you were fucking him behind my back! My best fucking friend. My little sister. What the actual fuck?” He gets up from the bed in a fit of rage and spins around to face us. “I can’t…I can’t even talk to either of you.”
I follow behind Will as he storms out of Mia’s bedroom. “Will, C'mon, man. Let me explain everything. You know I would never hurt your sister.”
Once we reach the kitchen, I lean back against the countertop. Will grips the top of the refrigerator, staring at me with more hatred than I have ever seen from him. We have never fought. Not even once. The few times we got into it, we worked out our aggression with either a hockey stick or our fists.
“How long has this been going on? I want the truth.”
“On and off since right after we moved in here. About three weeks. I kissed Mia the night we went to The Sixth Floor. You almost caught us together when you came home early. Mia was the reason I rented the room at the Ritz. I couldn’t stand living here with both of you, all while I wanted to be with your sister when I damn well knew I couldn’t have her.”
“You are not good enough for her.” His words burn like salt on a wound.
�
��I know. I tell Mia that all the time, but she doesn’t care. She wants to be with me anyway.”
“Some of the things I have seen you do.” He shakes his head. “Things I did with you. Mia is not like us. She’s pure and innocent and…Fuck, why did you have to touch her? You have your pick of girls; you didn’t need my sister.” He closes his eyes for a second and wrinkles his nose in disgust. “You did those things with my sister. I know you. I know what you like. I like that shit, too.”
“I will take care of Mia. You know I will.”
“Do you love her?”
“What kind of question is that?”
He steps closer to me, with his hands shoved into his jeans pockets. “Because you better not have ruined our friendship over pussy. You better fucking be in love with her.”
“Nothing is ruined, Will. You are overreacting.”
He walks away from me and into the small living room. “Don’t even bother coming back to the condo.”
“I live there, dick.”
“Lived,” he spits back. “You lived there. Past tense. Move the fuck out. Either you leave or I will. I don’t give a fuck.”
Mia comes out from the bedroom in a silky black robe tied at her waist, her feet bare and blonde hair over her shoulder. She makes a beeline for Will with her hands balled into fists at her sides. “Will, stop it. Please. Don’t be mad at Ethan. You are not throwing out your best friend and teammate because of me. I am a big girl. I decided to sleep with Ethan.”
When it comes to Mia, Will softens but not much. She tugs at the more sensitive side to Will, something I am unable to do. Both of us are arrogant hotheads who would rather beat the shit out of each to solve a problem. Mia is always the voice of reason. The one person who can calm both of us down.
“Are you two serious?” Will grits his teeth as he awaits Mia’s response.
Mia looks to me for confirmation. “Are we?”
I have no idea what to say. We were supposed to test out our relationship before Will picks up on my uncertainty and shakes his head at me with a smirk on his face.
“You fucking prick,” Will shouts. “You can’t even give her an answer.” He turns to Mia, scratching the stubble along his jaw. “Fuck him. You deserve so much better.”
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