by JM Dragon
“Excellent. I love being the center of attention. Want a glass before we eat, girls?”
Kris laughed. “Absolutely. Shirley?”
Shirley turned briefly and grinned. “Of course. Tomorrow is now my day off.”
†
Claire opened the second bottle of wine, glanced at the label, and nodded approvingly. Washington State had superb wines. She smiled as Kris and Shirley discussed some French pastry that was damn hard to pronounce. “Milly fluff” or something along those lines. Carefully she refilled their glasses and settled back in her chair as she simply listened to the two women. Reflecting that she had never felt this content in her life, she knew the feeling was all down to Kris and Shirley. Thank God Kris had mentioned that Shirley would have dinner along with her favorite desert. The older woman would have been devastated.
Damn I’m selfish.
Her parents had brought her up to be, insisted that she was, particularly her mother. It hadn’t felt odd to her until this moment. Now, as she gazed at the two women who weren’t selfish at all, she wondered what type of person she would have been if things had been different. Briefly, she closed her eyes, and the image of her dad came to mind.
He’s the most selfish son of a bitch I’ve ever encountered, and that includes me. His genes would have dictated she’d be like him for sure. How did you outrun family traits like that?
Kris looked in her direction and winked before raising her glass and smiling. She then took a sip and set it down on the table.
Dinner had been delicious. Then of course the best of all, for her at least, the lemon meringue pie. She liked it so much that she’d had two helpings. Her stomach protested, but every mouthful was a wonderful pleasure on her taste buds.
They’d toasted just about everything possible during dinner. The one that made the most impact on her had been Shirley’s toast. “May we always accept that there is a risk worth taking, and it will fulfil us for the rest of our lives.”
Hell of a statement. Maybe I’ll check Google and see if it’s a famous quote. She allowed her gaze to drift to Shirley. She wasn’t very attractive, and from Shirley’s own admission had never been.
Claire ran a hand through her hair and tried again to recall the name of the lover she’d had here who hadn’t worked out. It could have been her unused sex drive that had made her imagine such a thing. Yet it seemed real. Dare she ask Shirley, who would know for sure?
“Are you going to speak to us or just sit there with a faraway look on your face?” Shirley said.
Claire quickly diverted her attention to the women at the table.
“Now with two lovely looking ladies in front of me, why do you think I’m not interested in you both?” Claire winked at Kris, who shook her head with an amused smile lingering on her lips.
“Lovely be damned. Around this table we all need help in that department. That’s why I have my hair done every month. Works for me,” Shirley declared.
Claire stared at Shirley in shock and was glad when she saw a similar expression on Kris’s face. “Shirley, you must have had too much to drink. You never cuss. I’m amazed.”
Shirley looked confused for a moment, and then she giggled and giggled. “I don’t cuss.”
Raising her eyebrow slightly, Claire nodded. “Okay. Now what I want to know is—” she glanced at Kris, who gave her an expectant look “—you said you met Ricky in the rain and at the cottage. Just how did that happen?”
“Oh, I’ve told you, surely.”
“Nope. Kris?”
“Me either,” Kris replied.
Shirley drew her shoulders up, and this time she was the one who had the so-called faraway look. “I told you I was a cook’s assistant, right?”
“Yes,” they replied in unison.
“Mrs. Shepard was a hard taskmistress and didn’t want us young guns to mix with the outsiders. Except her husband, Ben, was the head gardener, so we were bound to mix eventually. I had been working at Seasons for a month before I actually met Ricky and we talked. It wasn’t much of a conversation really.” Shirley laughed. “I was asking him to bring over some baby carrots for the cook.” She stopped talking, seemingly lost in her memories.
“Did you love him at first sight?” Kris asked quietly.
Claire glanced at Kris and took a sip of her wine.
“I was enamored, but love…no, not that first time.” The room went quiet, then Shirley chuckled softly.
“The next day was a different story. Cook wanted onions this time and sent me to get them. I wasn’t keen since it looked like it was going to pour. I went, and as I approached the cottage, the heavens opened. Ricky saw me and grabbed my hand.” Shirley took a drink from her wineglass and settled it in front of her. “He took me under the eaves of the cottage porch. We talked for over an hour until the rain stopped. I took onions back to Seasons and a heart filled with love.”
“Did he love you too at that time?” Kris asked the very question Claire wanted to.
“My Ricky was a ladies’ man—at least that was what everyone said—but from that moment on he was mine. I was always expecting to hear of an infidelity or two. I’m not the most attractive person out there, as we said earlier. Calvin, Ricky’s best friend, was about to go into the Army. He met us at a dance in town. He looked at us and said to Ricky, ‘This is it. You’ll be sorry if you ignore what’s in front of you.’ Of course, I felt embarrassed. Ricky shrugged and danced with several other women. Calvin danced with me those times. When it was the end of the night, things changed.”
Kris stood, walked over to the faucet, and drew some water.
Claire considered her options. Normally she would have just waited, but not today. “Attraction helps us, but what made you decide Ricky was the one for you? It has to be more than that, and what happened during the last dance?”
Shirley smiled. “Right, girls that’s a story for another time, I’m going to have an early night. This wine is going to my head. Good night.” She stood and wobbled for a moment and headed toward the kitchen door.
“Do we help her?” Kris whispered.
The door opened and closed before Claire could answer.
“I guess if we hear her falling down the stairs, sure.”
“Claire!”
“She might not have made the stairs. When have you seen her drink this much?”
Claire frowned. “Never to the best of my recollection, but in anything there is always a first time.”
Kris stood and headed for the door. “I’m going to check.” She left. A minute later, she was back.
“And?”
Sheepishly Kris shrugged.
“She isn’t at the bottom of the stairs, if that’s what you mean.”
Claire chuckled and motioned Kris to sit by her.
Kris shook her head and walked over to her. “Meeting people that are important to your life is strange, don’t you think?”
Claire considered that for a few moments, and then placed her hand in Kris’s. “No, I think it’s wonderful. So now that she’s gone to bed, do you want to kiss me properly?”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Claire snuggled into Kris’s shoulder and began to nuzzle her neck. The petite giggles in response had her heart doing double takes. How did this woman have so much power over her? Even Racheal, who was a beautiful woman and exuded sex appeal had never made her feel this way. Excited, sure, and the sex had been great, but this was totally different.
I feel the euphoria of having sex just by being with Kris. Damn, I can’t wait until we get that far in our relationship. I really want to be that close, yet at the same time it doesn’t matter as long as she’s here. As long as she’s here, yeah, and in a week’s time we have to go our separate ways.
“Do you want to talk?” Claire smiled into the delicious neck her lips feasted on gently. When she moved away, Kris pulled back.
“We can talk, but I want you here.” Kris’s voice was a breathless request.
Claire m
oved to face her and kissed her soundly. “No place I’d rather be. Sometimes talking can be a distraction.”
Kris chuckled and kissed her shyly. “It can also be prudent.”
“Prudent, huh? You’ve been around Shirley way too much.” Claire laughed and nestled her head back on Kris’s shoulder.
“What do you want to know, Kris, that you haven’t actually read in the tabloids?”
The steady beat of Kris’s heart close to her ear settled Claire’s nerves about the conversation. The tabloids often got it wrong.
“The truth might help. The press isn’t always accurate…or are they?”
Claire shook her head slightly. “No, they are not.”
“I can see the damage, at least some of it, from the accident. Will you tell me how it happened and how you coped?”
The tentative question hung in the air. In most circumstances, Claire would have ignored it and moved on, but Kris wasn’t just someone—she might well be the most important person in Claire’s life.
“Bit of a blur, really. I know that sounds like a cop-out, but it really is.” She wiped a hand across her mouth and sucked in a deep breath. “I guess you know about the bullshit the papers reported, that I was drunk and it was my fault and I deserved everything that happened to me.”
Kris squeezed her hand. “Go on, please. Your version is the only one I’m interested in.”
Claire pulled away from her hold and half turned so they faced each other. “You might not like what you hear. In fact, I’m sure you won’t, but honesty is the only thing that will work. I know that now.” She stroked a finger down Kris’s cheek. “You bring out the good part of me, did you know that?” Kris shook her head. “It’s a great thing. Let’s see what I can remember. I have problems remembering some things, the whole memory loss and stuff. I was leaving the apartment of a woman I picked up at a club I frequented. Nothing new in that.”
Kris softly gasped. Claire didn’t have to ask why, yet Kris didn’t let go of her hand. Good sign, I hope.
“Yes, I know. I was engaged to Racheal, but we had an open relationship. That was the problem, I guess. It was too open. Anyway, the upshot was that I had exactly two drinks that evening. A wine before I went into the club and a shot at this woman’s apartment.”
Claire paused. The memories of what was real and what wasn’t intermingled. She recalled the image of dazzling lights and the sounds of bells.
“I felt woozy when I left the apartment. I should have done the sensible thing and caught a cab, but I drove instead. I had that mentality where I thought I was perfectly okay when I wasn’t. I knew I was close to the tracks, and the sound of the bells still haunts my dreams….”
Kris leaned forward and kissed her gently.
Claire smiled weakly. “I didn’t put two and two together, and the next thing I saw was harsh lights bearing down on me, yet I still didn’t have a clue. The rest, as they say, is history. I woke up a week later in the mess I’m in.”
Silence descended on the room.
Claire allowed herself to breathe again as Kris spoke.
“I’ve lived in New York for ten years now. I’m a country girl, really…from Broome. As I said, my parents didn’t understand me. That’s the bottom line, really. They didn’t look beyond the gender I fall in love with. I was almost twenty-one when I saw an ad for a clerk in an insurance office in New York City. It was in a three-day-old newspaper someone had left on a park bench. I loved going to the park on my break time, enjoying the open air and the birds singing.”
Claire heard Kris’s ramblings and the regret in her voice—she knew it by heart. Hers often had that tone. “My father said I deserved everything that came to me for my debauched way of life, insinuating the accident was payback.”
Kris’s eyes widened. “My dad wasn’t that vocal, but I’m sure he thought it.”
“You’re not debauched in any way! He’s a prick to say that or think it. Me, on the other hand, I could understand that line of thinking.” Claire sighed heavily. “I thought my mother might have been supportive. On reflection, she was for the first six months. She was always there, but I just needed more, I guess. Not that I knew what that would have been. My father, on the other hand, I think I saw him three times during the early stages of my convalescence. He has agreed to my going back to work for them behind a desk where no one can see me. So far, I’ve declined, but he pays the bills these days. I guess I might have limited choices ahead of me.”
Claire straightened her body. Baring her soul grated on her in the therapy sessions, and the frustration at having to talk about her feelings eventually made her angry and self-isolated.
“What about Racheal?”
What about Racheal? Yeah, that’s some question. “Ah, yes, you said the press didn’t affirm that we were no longer engaged. Truth be told, neither one of us thought to make it official at the time. It was just…yeah right, think, head.” At Kris’s puzzled look, she shrugged. “Racheal didn’t like the way I looked or my disability.” She looked down at the motionless limb. “I hate this too.” Tears welled and several dropped down her cheeks.
Kris tenderly wiped them away.
“The scars can be fixed if I want them to be, but this—” she eyed the offending limb with venom “—no, this will be a constant reminder.”
Gentle fingers took her arm and pulled it forward toward lips that caressed the scars. Claire could barely feel the pressure, but mentally it was a salve on her wounded skin.
“She left you?”
Claire smiled wryly. “Well, I thought so until she turned up last weekend.”
“What!”
Claire laughed at the outrage. “You went out on your date with Jess…and we need to talk about that.”
Kris’s expression turned sober.
“Racheal turned up out of the blue. God knows I didn’t expect or want to see her. We went to that bar we had the quiz in for a meal. Bottom line, she wants me back.” Claire looked for any reaction from Kris and saw nothing.
“She’s rich. That would solve your problems, right? Might be a good move.” Kris moved out of arm’s reach.
Damn, this truth business is stressful. “For the record, my Grams will bail me out before I have to succumb to Dad’s directives. She hates him. Racheal knows it’s over, and I told her to finally release the statement to the press. I love her as a good friend and always will. After all, we have a long history. My future, no, that’s totally different.”
“Why didn’t you mention this before?” Kris whispered.
“Wasn’t important.” Claire shrugged.
“To you, but…. No, you are right, it’s your business.” Kris’s voice dropped to a mere whisper.
Claire knew she had to say something that would manage this debacle of a conversation, but she didn’t know how. All she wanted right now was Kris close to her. This distance thing wasn’t a good feeling at all. “Do you know what I remember the most out of that dinner with Racheal? I recalled more of what the server said to me than what Racheal said, and she knew it. How would you feel if that was you and Jess?”
Kris dropped back in the sofa, closed her eyes, and sighed. “Horrible. I don’t think I’d…I guess I can’t say. I’ve never been in that position. You never know what you might do.”
Tentatively Claire touched Kris’s fingers and was rewarded when Kris caught her hand and squeezed gently.
“Jess isn’t my girlfriend. Our so-called date didn’t quite go according to plan. I think she has history, as you call it, with a woman named Fern. Actually, I was surprised we didn’t see her at the quiz since she said she’s there every night. Anyway, it all went to hell in a basket at the end of the evening, if you could call it that. I arrived home early. I guess I’m not into drama.”
Claire laughed loudly. “Darling, drama and lesbians go in hand in glove. The only thing to beat us is gay men and let me tell you—”
Kris pulled her close. “I don’t care about that. I just care about wh
at you think about us.”
Claire smiled. “I don’t think about us.” Kris’s lips dropped. “I feel about us. I figure that’s a million times better.” Claire didn’t have a chance to say more as her lips were captured in an intense kiss that drowned out everything but the woman who placed her arms around her and hugged her close.
Perfect.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
“Hey, Buddy, it’s snack time. Come on.”
Claire craned her neck to look at every visible branch and tried to see those that weren’t. No amount of cajoling received a response. She looked at the tree at least ten feet away and saw activity moving over to the next tree as the birds skedaddled.
Hmm, Buddy never does that.
“Come on, Buddy, you’ve had your fun. I have your favorite here.” She crumbled the cookies in her hand and held them out. Five minutes later, she dropped the crumbles on the ground at the usual tree, turned to the cottage, and simply took in the sight.
Gone were the dilapidated windows and the general impression of neglect. Now a glow emanated from the cottage, and it had a lot to do with the hard work that had gone into the property in the last few weeks. However, it was more than that, much more. A positive ambiance surrounded it, as if it had come alive with an ethereal hand held out in welcome.
Crap, that’s getting way too deep for me.
She stepped onto the decking and looked at the hard work Kris had done to sand it down for the final finish, which they were going to do today.
Kris. Every time she’s in my orbit, I melt away. What does that say? I’m a serial philanderer. How can I feel this way, and yet I do, what does that mean? The question isn’t about Kris, it’s about me. Can I be the person she deserves?
†
Kris watched Claire shout for Buddy. Apparently he didn’t appear. Not that odd, considering he was courting and the female had probably found a more favorable place to live. It happened. After several attempts, Claire gave up and was now standing on the deck.