by Anne Carol
It was up to God now to decide if and when she became pregnant.
London
Eight weeks later…
“He’s still not home!” I grumbled into the phone as I paced the kitchen floor. A glance at the clock told me it was already 9:30. “Oh my, gosh, this whole evening is ruined.”
“I’m sorry, cousin,” Jenny said. “I know you’ve been waiting all day.”
“Well, I’m getting tired.” I sighed. “I think it’s time to give up.”
“Aww, Beth. You should still tell him when he gets in. Who cares if it’s not the way you’d planned?”
I rubbed my stomach, disappointed my special dinner had been a waste. “If he only knew…”
“He’ll be over the moon when he finds out.”
I smiled. “Yeah. He’s been watching me like a hawk ever since we returned from the Caribbean.”
“He’ll be such a good daddy.”
Heaviness poured through my body. “Jenny, I don’t want to get too excited until we get past twelve weeks. That’s when we lost Michael. Please pray over this little one. I’ll be devastated if the worst happens again.”
“Of course I’ll pray. Just go get some rest and try not to fret.”
“Thanks, Jenny. Talk to you soon. I’ll let you know how it goes.”
After I hung up the phone, I got a glass of water and parked myself on the sofa. Dinner had long since been put away, the candles blown out, and the dishes washed. Light jazz music still played as my eyes fell on the coffee table. A month-old article from a tabloid read:
VINYL FOG GUITARIST AND WIFE ENJOY A ROMANTIC HOLIDAY
David Somers, guitarist from the London-based rock band, Vinyl Fog, was photographed with his wife, Beth, while enjoying a holiday on the island of Petite St. Vincent. They were first spotted at a local outdoor pub, dancing to a reggae band. The following day, photographer Greg Shields of Celebrity magazine snapped this compromising picture of the couple on a private beach. It appears Mr. and Mrs. Somers are very much in love. Could a family be in the works for this gorgeous couple?
The remainder of the band, members Trevor Miles, Pete Fox, Don Morris, and Martin Bassett, arrived three days later to begin shooting a series of music videos. The band, founded in 1979, is set to embark on their third North American tour this coming January.
The article included a photo of us dancing at the club, as well as a blurred out snapshot of our private moment on the beach. I’d nearly fainted when Jenny showed me the magazine. I didn’t ask her what she’d been doing reading that garbage, but I’m glad she’d brought it to my attention. Even though the pictures didn’t grace the cover, I felt I should warn my parents and in-laws. David didn’t take it well, which was no surprise.
I’d held my hands over my ears as he cursed the photographer, threatening all sorts of bodily harm toward the man.
“David, your language,” I scolded.
“I’m sorry, but Beth…I’m going mad here! Where is that photograph? How many other pictures did he take? This is a nightmare!”
It had taken me a while to calm him down, even as I came to grips with the shock myself. At the time the pictures were taken, I’d been in vacation mode and not concerned. Now I was sickened by the invasion of privacy. David didn’t need this kind of stress. Yes, he’d gone months without a drink, but I knew it wouldn’t take much for him to fall off the wagon. Fortunately, he threw himself into studio work and put the issue to rest.
Tonight I’d hoped to give him good news. But that didn’t happen.
Placing the magazine back on the table, I finished off my water and headed to the bathroom to brush my teeth and get ready for bed.
I was completely conked out when I felt soft lips on my forehead. They carried a scent of crisp peppermint, masking a hint of tobacco. “Mmm…” I mumbled. “David?”
“Who else?” He chuckled, pushing my hair behind my ear. “Should I be worried?”
“Very funny,” I grumbled, turning over so my back was to him.
“You’re cross with me, I know. I’m sorry it’s so late.”
“Why didn’t you call?”
“Actually I did, but the line was busy. And then…well, no excuses, I forgot to try again.”
“Oh,” I said, not able to hide my disappointment.
“Is everything all right, angel?”
I was quiet for a moment. Should I tell him?
“Beth?” he asked again. Now’s your chance.
“Just go to sleep.” Chicken.
He tucked me in his arms from behind like we were two spoons nestled together. His smell, the warmth of his touch, and a light kiss on the back of my neck broke down the invisible barrier. What the heck.
“David…I’m pregnant,” I spoke barely above a whisper.
The bed shook like an earthquake as he scrambled out of the covers and switched on the bedside lamp. “What?” I’d never seen his eyes so wide or his smile so radiant. “Really? You’re sure?”
I nodded. Quite sure.
He placed his hand over my belly like it was a precious work of art. “A baby.” He laughed. “I can’t believe it.”
“Believe it. I was planning on telling you over a nice dinner tonight.” I frowned.
Wincing, he said, “Oh, sweetheart. I’m so sorry.”
“Anyway, now you know. I’ve got an appointment tomorrow, and you’re welcome to come along.”
“Of course I’m coming. I wouldn’t miss this for anything.” He cupped my face and kissed me tenderly. “I’m so happy, Beth.”
It took him several minutes to settle down, but we finally resumed our previous embrace, only this time he placed a hand on my stomach, as if he were already protecting our baby.
The following morning I woke up to David’s dewy eyes watching me. “How are you feeling?”
“Sleepy. Someone was a little excited last night.” I rubbed my eyes.
“Still excited. I’m surprised I was able to sleep.”
I smiled, stroking his cheek. “You had your hands on my tummy the entire night.”
“I make no apologies that I plan to spoil this baby.” He smirked. “What time is our appointment?”
“You’d better not make this kid a brat.” I playfully poked his chest. “Appointment’s at ten.”
He glanced at the clock. “You’ve got thirty minutes, Beth.”
“What? We should get going.” I tossed back the covers and hopped to my feet, wavering a bit. “Woah.” I gripped my forehead as my stomach dropped to my ankles.
David scooted to the side of the bed and steadied me. “Careful.”
Even though we were short on time, he insisted I eat some oatmeal. “You’re pale as a ghost, Beth.” I felt nauseous, but I knew I’d feel worse if I didn’t give myself some fuel. Fuel for two, now.
Having a sour stomach was just part of being pregnant, but this morning my stomach was touchy for another reason. Soon, David would learn the truth about how pregnant I was, and worse, that this wasn’t my first trip to the doctor.
As soon as I told David about the baby, I knew I’d made a poor decision in waiting this long. At the time, I thought I was doing the right thing, but now all I could think about was how selfish and stupid I’d been.
God, please don’t let him be too upset.
The nurse finally called Beth’s name. She gave me a tenuous smile as she rose from her seat. I fought the urge to take her in my arms, for I knew this was a big moment for us. Instead, I linked our hands and headed in with her.
In all my excitement, I forgot about the possibility of being recognized, so when the nurse got tongue-tied after greeting me, I cringed inwardly.
“Y-You’re—” the dark-haired young woman stammered as we followed her to the examination room.
“I’m David Somers.” I held out my hand and she shook it, displaying a cheeky grin.
“What an honor to meet you. I have every one of your albums,” she gushed.
Beth was strangely quiet as
she walked ahead of me. Probably rolling her eyes.
“Why thank you,” I glanced at her name tag, “Katrina. I expect you won’t be sharing our secret with anyone, right?” I winked at her, giving her all my charm, as well as a gentle warning. “I’d be happy to sign your albums in return on our next visit.”
“Oh, of course. Your secret is safe with me. And that would be fabulous.” She lifted her shoulders and let out a soft squeal.
You’d better not spoil this, lady. I clenched my teeth. One of the biggest struggles of fame was preserving our privacy. My body tensed at the thought of our news getting leaked to the press.
We entered the examination room, and the nurse—who now had a bounce in her step—checked Beth’s weight, blood pressure, and temperature. She jotted the information on a clipboard, and turned to Beth.
“Looks like you’re here for a ten-week check-up?”
I snapped to attention. Ten weeks?
Beth’s face flushed crimson, and she paused. “Um…yes, that’s correct.”
“Undress your bottom half and take a seat on the exam table. Doctor should be right in.” She grabbed her paperwork, gave me one final smile, and breezed out of the room.
It was like I’d been pummeled in the chest. Ten weeks? That can’t be right.
Beth removed her bottoms and wrapped a paper covering around her waist. Keeping her face down, she climbed onto the exam table.
“What did she mean…ten weeks?” I asked, my mouth void of moisture.
“I’m ten weeks along,” she muttered, studying her fingernails.
“H-how?” I swallowed hard. “How long have you known?” Crikey, I’d asked her practically every day how she was feeling. Surely, she would have told me the moment she suspected.
Before she could answer, a middle-aged gentleman entered the room, donning a white jacket with a name tag reading, “Dr. Noble.”
They exchanged greetings, as if they were familiar with each other. This is not her first visit. Heat burned the back of my neck. It angered me that this stranger knew more than I did about my wife’s pregnancy. Biting my lip, I tried to remain calm as Beth lay back on the table and allowed Dr. Noble to examine her. He seemed gentle with her, but I had to look away when he did his internal exam. My fingers tensed as I gripped the chair. He’s her doctor, you loon. Relax.
But I couldn’t relax. In fact, I could hardly catch my breath when the doctor confirmed what the nurse had said: Beth was ten weeks pregnant. I was no slouch in maths, so it took but a few seconds to calculate that we’d conceived on our holiday in the Caribbean. That made the trip extra special, but it hurt that Beth kept this important news to herself. Why, when she knew how eager I was to start a family?
“We’re looking at an approximate due date of June 15th.”
“Honey, that’s close to your birthday,” Beth pointed out, smiling.
Though I was bitter, I couldn’t help returning a smile. What a wonderful birthday gift.
The doctor finished his exam and proceeded to give Beth instructions on how to care for herself and our unborn baby. I tried to listen, but the ache inside made me numb.
She got dressed, and then we went back to the car, neither of us speaking. My jaw tightened as I slipped the key into the ignition. Beth gripped her appointment card like it was a lifeline. “Just say it, you’re mad.” She turned away just as I pulled out onto the street.
Keeping my eyes forward, I said with a clip, “How long have you known?”
She didn’t answer right away. Fantastic.
“Um.” Her voice was small, timid. “A month.”
“A month?” I roared. What was wrong with her? Running my hands through my hair, I continued, “I-I just don’t understand. Why would you not tell me the minute you found out? I mean, I’ve been hinting around for eight weeks!”
She crossed her arms over her chest and stared at the floor. “Do you really have to ask?”
When she began crying, I pulled the car off the road and parked. Regardless of my frustration, I couldn’t bear to hear her cry. My emotions were all over the map. I couldn’t stop myself from reaching over and wiping away her tears. “Don’t cry, angel. Just tell me.”
She sniffed, and then began, “When I realized I was pregnant, it took a good week for reality to sink in. I never imagined we’d get pregnant so soon. I guess it took me by surprise. And then,” she glanced down, “I found myself waiting for the worst to happen. Meanwhile, you kept asking me how I was feeling, obviously anxious for me to get pregnant. The pressure was too much.” She looked up at me. “I was dying to tell you, but then I kept thinking if I lost this baby, you wouldn’t be able to handle it. You had too much going on to deal with that kind of grief. So I waited. And then those stupid pictures showed up in the tabloid, so we had that to deal with. Finally, once my morning sickness began, I knew I couldn’t put it off any longer, so I set a date—last night.”
It took me a moment to gather my thoughts. “You know what upsets me the most? That you assumed things about me, that I wouldn’t be able to handle another miscarriage. Beth, that was not your decision to make! We are married. This is our child. What you did was so unfair.”
“It is unfair. You’re right.” Her voice wavered. “I admit I was stupid. If I could go back and change things, I would, but I can’t!” She buried her face in her hands and wept. Watching her fall apart killed me, so I gathered her in my arms and kissed the top of her head.
“If, heaven forbid, we miscarry again, we’ll grieve as one, do you understand? You will not go through that kind of pain alone, ever. Now I’m only going to say this once: do not keep anything from me. Please.”
She nodded silently into my chest and grew still as I stroked her hair. “I want this baby so much, David. The closer I get to twelve weeks, the more anxious I get.” Placing her hand on her stomach, she continued, “I love our little guy or gal.”
“So do I. I’m gutted that I’ve already missed a month of talking to the peanut. And I think about all that time I should’ve kept a closer eye on you. Don’t you know how protective I am?”
She sat upright and gave me a pointed gaze. “You mean overprotective.”
“Oh, you haven’t seen anything yet.” I smirked.
She rolled her eyes, now red-rimmed and moist. “Perfect excuse to go caveman on me, right?”
“You know it.”
A wave of euphoria ran through me. I loved being her protector, and now she was carrying our tiny baby, she’d guessed right. What a task I had ahead of me. I’m going to drive her mad, but I don’t care.
“No more secrets?” I asked, sweeping her hair off her shoulder.
“No more secrets, David. I promise. I want to do this together.” She took my hand and placed it on her still-flat belly. My baby is in there. No drug in the world could have made me as high as I was in that moment.
We stopped by my parents’ house that night and told them the good news. My mother cried, “Oh, I can’t wait to meet the wee bairn!” My father, to my surprise, told me I’d make a “fine young father.” That meant a lot coming from him, considering he hadn’t been supportive the first time, but I supposed twenty-three was a better age than eighteen to become a father.
While we were at my parents’, we phoned the other future grandparents out in California. Mike and Sharon were overjoyed with the news and were already making plans to fly to London in June.
The following day, I couldn’t hide my sheepish grin at the studio. As I tried to concentrate on tuning my Fender, Martin nudged me. “So you heard the news, then?”
“Uh, what’s that?” I asked, confused. Did they know already?
“We’re doing the theme song for the next James Bond movie!”
“You’re joking!” I faked enthusiasm. Actually, I was rather excited about writing a song for a giant film organization. It would do wonders for our status as a band. But that news paled in comparison to my own.
“Beth and I are expecting a baby,” I bl
urted out, unable to keep it inside.
The room grew quiet and all eyes were on me. A second later, everyone erupted with “congratulations.”
Trevor walked over and slapped me on the back. “Somers, you’ve been busy!”
Morris looked over a notepad and drew his eyebrows together. He rubbed his hand down his face and said, “Oh, boy. When’s the due date?”
“June 15th.”
“I was afraid of that. That’s about the time we’ll be closing up our North American tour. Your wee one may be born across the Pond.”
I gripped my forehead as I imagined Beth giving birth in the back of a tour bus, in a strange city. This can’t be.
Oh, the joys of being a rock star.
I didn’t know how to process the news, so I asked God for patience. David didn’t need me falling apart, even though I was shaky with panic. This situation was far from ideal.
“David, please tell me I’m not having this baby alone.” My voice quavered as I leaned against the kitchen counter, gripping the edge.
“You won’t, Beth. If need be, we can arrange to have the baby in the U.S.,” David calmly stated as he poured himself a cup of tea.
“Where? Do you expect me to pop out a baby on the tour bus on the way to the next city?”
He set down his mug and took a step toward me, running a hand through his hair. “Beth, I know you’re upset, but please try to stay calm.”
“Sorry, honey. I’m just scared. I imagined having our baby here in London, with my husband by my side, and settling into parenthood in the comfort of my own home. You understand?”
“Sweetie, we’re doing everything we can to adjust the schedule.” He set his hand on my shoulder and rubbed the tension away. “No matter what, I will be at your side, even if we have to cancel a show or get a fill-in.”
I stepped into his arms. “What poor timing.”
He held me close. “I know, angel, but I promise I won’t let anything bad happen to you or the baby. Things might be a bit up in the air, yes, but I’ll do everything in my power to make sure you’re comfortable.”