by Cat Johnson
“I’m truly sorry for you, John.” Marly took a step back and out of his reach. More than anger, she felt pity. He really was messed up. Maybe growing up in the kind of life he had made it impossible for him to be any other way. “You think you don’t have a choice in how you live, and that’s sad for you. But I do have a choice, and I would never be happy being what you’re asking me to be.”
She turned and opened the door, then paused and looked back at him. “Goodbye. Please don’t call or try to see me again. Take the jewelry if you want. It’s all in the box on the bedroom dresser. You can let yourself out.”
Still shaking from the encounter, Marly walked out, leaving him standing in her apartment alone. He didn’t look shocked or saddened. In fact, his expression told her he didn’t believe a thing she’d just said. He’d continue to call and drop by, but she felt stronger now. She’d deal with it until he finally got the message, gave up on her and found himself a new girl.
But right now, there was someone she needed to see. Marly drove way too fast to the hospital. She swung her car into a space in the lot and left it parked crooked in her rush to get inside. She strode into the lobby, not stopping until she hit the security desk. “I’m looking for Bull Ford’s room.”
The guard searched the list. Twice. He shook his head. “I’m not finding a Bull Ford.”
Probably because it was doubtful Bull was his real first name. The touch of a hand on her shoulder had her jumping.
“That’s all right, Joe. I’ll handle this.”
She didn’t recognize the man who’d spoken. He, however, seemed to know the guard.
“Marly Spencer?”
It seemed he knew her as well. “Yes.”
He took a few steps back from the desk. She followed. “Nice to meet you in person. I’m Matt Coleman.”
He smiled and gave her a cocky, knowing look. She frowned, trying to place him. She met so many people out on gigs, they often remembered her, but she rarely recalled them.
“I’m sorry, I don’t…” Then it hit her. She drew in a quick breath and felt her face heat. “That Matt? Bull’s Matt?”
“Yeah. I’m afraid so.” He cringed. While she processed that this man had listened to her and Bull during a very intimate moment, he continued, “We need to talk before you go up and see Bull.”
“Is he all right?” All embarrassment disappeared, replaced by concern.
Matt bobbed his head. “Physically, he’s healing. That’s not the problem. Marly, he doesn’t remember anything about that night.”
“You mean the explosion.”
“No, I mean absolutely nothing. Not his being assigned to work security at the party, or the terrorists…or you.”
For the second time in an hour, Marly felt sick to her stomach. “Maybe once he sees me.”
“Maybe.” Matt nodded. “Our commander is talking to his doctor now to see how to proceed.”
How to proceed? Marly knew how to proceed. She would march right into his room, tell him what they’d shared, throw her arms around him and kiss him until he remembered her. “I want to see him.”
Matt grinned. “You don’t care what the doctor says, do you?”
“Yes, of course I care and I would never do anything to harm Bull, but…”
“But you still want to see him.”
He was still grinning at her, and she felt her face blush hotter.
“Look. I know you heard everything.”
“Yeah, I did. But don’t stress too much about it.” He let out a snort of a laugh. “Believe it or not, that happens a lot to me. No one else on the team knows about you and Bull. At least, I didn’t tell them. But no one else knowing isn’t necessarily a good thing. You go up there and as far as everyone else is concerned, you’re just the girl he saved that night. That’s it. How are you going to explain when you freak out because he doesn’t remember you or, you know, what you two did?”
“I’m not planning on freaking out.” She wasn’t like that. Hadn’t she sat quietly in a closet while men with machine guns tried to kill everyone? Besides, she knew once Bull saw her, he’d remember. He had to. She crossed her arms over her chest. “Can you take me to his room now?”
“Yeah. Wait here.” Matt went back to the guard and got her a visitor badge as she waited with her heart pounding until she was lightheaded.
They reached the room and found the door open, but the curtain drawn around the bed. People were in there with Bull. She could hear them talking. Marly stopped in the doorway. Matt stayed behind her in the hall, watching her. She could hear a man with a strong Southern drawl. It sounded like he was retelling the tale of that night.
“So the tangos are fixin’ to blow the place. They rigged this bomb with instructions they found on the internet. So yeah, it made a hell of a noise, but it was only powerful enough to blow out the wall in the closet where you were hiding. The blast barely even reached the room where they were. There was no way that thing was taking down a big stone building like that. The damn sprinkler system did the biggest damage. The water ruined all the plaster walls and antiques and crap. The historical society is freaking out.”
“But there were no casualties?” The sound of Bull’s familiar voice made Marly’s pulse beat faster.
“Well, no civilian casualties. Although the docs say you probably saved that harpist’s life. If you hadn’t thought to throw her in that old bathtub and lay on top of her, she would have been pretty bad off. The hostages out in the main room were all scared shitless. But I can tell you the tangos didn’t walk out of there. All three of them were carrying some pretty heavy artillery. Once we hit the room, armed and ready, we had to deal with the situation as we saw fit. You really don’t remember anything before the explosion?”
Marly held her breath and waited for Bull’s answer.
“Not a damn thing, Jack.” Bull laughed. “I wish I did. It sounds like a hell of a night. Hey, did anybody remember to call to Lana?”
“Here’s the phone, Bull. Want me to dial your girl’s number for ya?”
Lana? A sob escaped Marly’s throat as she pushed past Matt. He ran after her. He tried to grab her arm, but she shook him off. Rather than wait for the elevator, she barreled down the stairs, all the way down to the lobby floor and out into the parking lot.
Chapter Seven
“I have one question.” Besides why he still couldn’t remember a thing after the night of the training exercise with Kappa. “Why the hell is Dickhead’s son sending me flowers?” Bull indicated the massive arrangement that blocked half the window.
“Don’t know, maybe he likes you.” Jack waggled his eyebrows suggestively. “Maybe he plays on a different team than we do? It would explain why Dickhead Junior didn’t do it for Lia and she’s with my pea-brained brother instead.”
“I heard that.” Jimmy came around the curtain. “Hey, Bull. Glad to see you sitting up. And I can answer what my brother here couldn’t. It seems the harpist you saved is involved with Dickhead Junior. He was very grateful she didn’t come home in pieces, thanks to you.”
Things were beginning to make sense. Bull nodded and then wished he hadn’t when the pain in his head protested the move. “Thanks for clearing that up. The harpist must be the Marly who sent me the card and the little stuffed bull. Now, one more question. When the hell do I get out of here and get back to work?”
Jack and Jimmy both grinned, looking more like brothers than usual. Bull did notice how neither one answered his question though. Damn military protocol was going to make him prove he was ready for work, both mentally and physically. He’d rather deal with bombs than military red tape.
“Hey, there.” Lana’s sultry voice filled the room as she sashayed around the curtain.
Maybe when he would get sprung from the hospital didn’t matter all that much. Bull smiled. Nothing better than a girlfriend to kiss your boo boos and make them go away. Hell, he didn’t hurt that bad. He was healed enough to do more than kissing.
“Howdy, boys.” She
sent Jack and Jimmy one of her sizzling smiles.
Bull felt his cock start to stir just from being near her. “Thanks for visiting, guys. I’ll be seeing you.” He couldn’t shoo his teammates out of the room fast enough for his liking. He wanted Lana alone.
Jack laughed. “I guess we’ll check up on you later.”
“Much later,” Bull added. He heard Jimmy chuckle as the two men left the room, but he only had eyes for Lana as he noticed how she’d left the top few buttons of her blouse undone.
“I was so worried about you. How are you? You really don’t remember a thing that happened?” She crawled onto the mattress next to him.
“Nope.” He reached up to grab her head for a kiss.
She pulled back. “Nothing at all?”
The poor thing. She was so concerned about his memory loss, he should comfort her instead of her comforting him. “I remember how good you feel. Now come here, baby, and kiss me.”
She smiled. “All right.”
Once Lana began to work her special magic on him, he started to feel better immediately.
Recovery took a hell of a lot longer than Bull would have liked. Though to be fair, he’d wanted to walk out of the hospital the moment he woke up. Pain or no pain. The damn doctors wouldn’t let him go home for almost a week. Something about traumatic brain injury. The worst part was he wasn’t supposed to partake in any strenuous activities for another week after that. That ruled out his two favorite past times—working out with his team and having sex.
He made it a whole day at home. When he’d decided he’d watched every stupid television show, played as many video games as he could stand and had done the very last crossword puzzle he ever wanted to do, he pulled on his sweatpants and sneakers and headed for Lana’s.
She’d visited him in the hospital as often as she could around her work schedule. When he was sprung and got to go home, she’d brought him food, done his laundry, even cleaned his house. She was behaving like the perfect girlfriend, which was a little strange since she’d never acted like that before. He had no clue what was up. Maybe him almost getting killed made her appreciate him more. Whatever the cause, her model behavior was making him start to consider that maybe he was ready for more than just a casual relationship with her.
He’d have to think on that. There was one thing for sure, after over a week of recovery, he was more than ready to get busy with her in the bedroom…or maybe the hot tub. He could call and she’d come running, but he’d had enough of being stuck in his house. After the hospital stay, cabin fever was hitting him hard. He had to get out.
Driving wasn’t a strenuous activity. The doctors couldn’t even complain about that. Getting up into the truck was another story. Cracked ribs hurt like hell for a long time. No way around that. He’d had them before. He’d deal with them now. He and Lana would just have to take it easy in bed. He didn’t mind the idea of her doing all of the work for a little while until he was back in top shape. Not one bit.
He pulled up to her house and found a parking space along the curb two houses down from hers. Gingerly lowering himself out of the truck, he couldn’t get over a feeling of déjà vu.
Bull cut across the lawn and knocked on her front door. They hadn’t been dating for too long, and up to now the time they’d been together had been pretty tumultuous, so they hadn’t done the key-exchange thing yet. Before his injury, he thought they never would. He’d had no interest in taking things farther with Lana. Now, it was a definite possibility.
Lana answered the door wearing her sweetest smile and not much more. He took in her tiny top and shorts and smiled. “Hey, baby. I needed to get out of the house and maybe take a soak in your hot tub. Sorry I didn’t call. I knew you’d try to stop me.”
“Bull, you know the doctor said—”
“I know what the doctor said.” He ignored the reprimand in her tone and pushed passed her into the house. He headed toward the sliding glass back door and paused. “Are you going to join me in the hot tub or am I going to be naked all alone?”
“I’d better come with you so you don’t accidentally drown.” Smiling, she followed him outside onto the back deck.
Something was nagging in the back of Bull’s brain as he watched Lana strip out of her clothes and submerge herself down to her chin in the steaming water. But she was naked and willing and he wasn’t going to waste his traumatized brain’s power trying to figure out riddles. He sat on the deck chair and reached to untie his shoelace so he could get naked and join her.
One size thirteen hit the wood, followed by the second, landing with a thud. Bull stared at the sneakers at his feet. He could almost feel his brain working, excavating through gray matter, unearthing something hidden just below the surface.
Like a floodgate had been opened, memories came rushing back. He drew in a sharp breath as a jumble of scenes bombarded him. He had to sort them out as they hit, hard and fast, one after another. The Kappa team member taking out the hostage during the training exercise while Bull lay on the ground, helpless. Coming to Lana’s after the bar for comfort. Finding her naked with skinny dude. The terrorists at the party and…
Holy crap, the feel of coming inside Marly just moments before the explosion knocked him out while he shielded her body beneath his in the old tub.
His pulse pounded, blocking out even the noise of the hot tub jets. He felt dizzy. Lana swam to the side and frowned up at him. “Are you all right?”
He shook his head. “No, I’m not. I…um…I’m gonna go.”
“Okay.” She nodded. “Do you need me to drive you home?”
Now he remembered her cheating, he didn’t want her to do him any favors. He didn’t want her anywhere near him. Hell, she wasn’t even worth getting into it with. Why yell or fight about that other guy now when there was only one place he wanted to go. One person he needed to see.
He grabbed his sneakers and shoved his feet back into them again, shaking his head as realization fully hit. It was no wonder she’d been sweet as pie. She’d gotten quite the reprieve when he lost his memory. Talk about wiping the slate clean. If he hadn’t remembered, she would have gotten away with it. And how long would it have been until she got bored waiting for Bull to get back from a mission and got tempted by another guy again? They could have started living together. They could have gotten married. That was frightening.
Things were still jumbled and hazy. There were big holes in his memories and missing time. He thought he remembered hearing something important in the hospital, but he hadn’t paid much attention to it then. Now that he thought about it, hadn’t Jimmy told him Marly was dating Dickhead’s son? Yet she’d had sex with Bull the night of the bombing. The fear of death did strange things to people. Chances were that was why she’d been with Bull then, and she was probably still with her boyfriend now.
That thought really sucked.
Bull drove toward home but when he got there, he didn’t get out of the truck. He sat with the engine idling, not knowing what to do. He felt like crawling out of his own skin. Like there wasn’t enough room for him inside his body along with all the memories. He’d thought he’d be happy his memory was back, but damn, maybe he was happier before being blissfully ignorant.
He threw the truck into gear. He needed to drive. Move around. Sitting still would make him crazy. Bull drove for a bit until he realized he was in front of Matt’s house.
Matt, the only other person who knew what had really happened that night with Marly in the closet.
He parked behind Matt’s vehicle and headed for the house. He knocked until his knuckles stung.
When Matt opened the door, Bull didn’t wait for him to say hello. “I remember.”
“Good.” Matt took a step back. “Come in and sit down. You look like hell.”
Bull laughed. “I feel like hell. I remembered that before I got blown to shit, I caught Lana cheating on me. But because I couldn’t remember, she was going on like nothing happened. She would never have told me.�
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“That sucks, dude.” Matt shook his head. “What made you remember?”
“Watching her get into the hot tub.”
Matt hissed in a breath. “Ouch. Exactly where you found her with that guy.”
“Wait. You know? How do you know?”
“You’re still running a little slow, Bull. I heard everything you said to Marly. Remember? Believe me, I would rather not have.”
“Things are still a little fuzzy about that night. I knew you heard the…uh, stuff that happened, but I forgot you would have heard me telling her about Lana too. Hell, I forgot even telling her about Lana’s cheating. Hey, what the fuck?” Bull frowned at his supposed friend. “You know and don’t tell me I don’t remember I caught my girl cheating on me? What if I asked her to move in or marry me or something?”
“I thought about telling you, but the doctor said your memory would likely come back in a few days. I thought it would be better if you remembered on your own. I didn’t want to kick you while you were down in the hospital.” Matt shrugged. “I would have said something if it came to keys or rings. I swear, Bull. But hey, now you remember you can go see Marly.”
Bull scowled. “She’s with Dickhead Junior. Didn’t you see the gigantic bouquet he sent me for saving her life? I guess she only wanted to be with me that night because she thought we were going to die.”
Matt frowned and shook his head. “You really don’t remember everything, do you? Don’t you remember that night she told you she broke up with her boyfriend? She called him a dick. Twice.”
“Really?” Bull wanted to believe it was true. And since Matt had no reason to lie, it must be. “Wow, I’d never thought I’d ever say this, but thank God you were there eavesdropping. At least you remember what happened since I can’t seem to.”
“You will. In time.” Matt slapped him on the shoulder. “There’s one more thing you need to know.”
“What?” Bull was afraid to ask.
“You weren’t just a one-night thing for Marly. She came to see you at the hospital the day you woke up.”