Thanks to the curious people, who swarmed around me as I walked, Alex and I were the last two into our next class. Everyone else had already taken their seats, and was chattering happily to their neighbors in the usual pre-class roar of noise and excitement as we entered. Alex released my arm with a smile, and went to take her seat in the middle of the room. She immediately leaned over to her neighbor, a tiny boy with a bad complexion, and started talking to him. His eyes brightened noticeably when he saw her, and it was my turn to smile. I knew the boy looked forward to her talking to him more than anything else during the day. I also knew that she knew that and made a special point to talk to him every day. As I handed the mousy woman at the front of the room the slip to sign, my eyes traveled beyond Alex to search for an open seat. Secrets and images swirled around in my head in a poorly conceived dance of visuals and noise, making my head pulse with the beat. Whenever I accidently caught eyes with someone, their thoughts grew louder, then dimmed, as I moved on to find a seat which was unoccupied.
I sighed in irritated acceptance when I saw Daniel next to the only available desk at the back of the room, talking to a boy in front of him. Although he was smiling, I noticed him tapping one of his long pale fingers on the small desk he was crammed into. I took it to be a sign of impatience or irritation. Had he also come to the conclusion I would have no choice but to sit next to him?
The teacher introduced herself as Mrs. Heart as she handed me a large text book with Marlowe’s face plastered on the front. Her thoughts were strong, but not obtrusively so. Poor dear, looks like she’s been manhandled by a hedgehog. Shouldn’t judge, though. She looks just like my cousin Jeanie… I really should call her. Haven’t talked to her in ages…
I had to suppress the impulse to laugh out loud at her description of my hair, liking her choice of words. They were unusual. I didn’t need any more stares, though…or anyone thinking I was a crazy person. It was my first day, after all. Book in hand, I walked down the aisle and steeled myself for whatever Daniel would say next, if he even talked to me at all. I marshaled my sarcasm and disdain just in case, feeling I would need it and more to deal with him.
As I sat down, he peeked over at me and smirked again. I wondered what he was thinking and why he was smirking. That was an idea…What was he thinking? I concentrated, trying to hone in on his thoughts. It was difficult; I’d never gone looking for one person’s thoughts in particular before – typically people’s thoughts found me. As I concentrated, all the voices flooded in, the sheer volume threatening to overwhelm me. It was like listening to a waterfall of noise inside my head, without the benefit of a muffler. I shifted through the thoughts of homework, crushes, and a million other worries, but I didn’t hear any voices that sounded like his. Not a single slither of thought which could be mistaken for his. I turned to look at him, knowing that if I looked at him I could find his thoughts easier. My leather jacket creaked with the agitated movement as I searched out his strange eyes. He was laughing softly at a joke the boy in front of him had just made, the laughter not quite reaching his eyes. The laugh was melodic and magical, but I still couldn’t hear his thoughts.
The new girl is staring at Daniel. They all can’t get enough of him. I think he does the not dating thing on purpose just to drive them crazy. I wonder if that would help me…
A vision of a massive score of nameless girls begging for attention surged into my brain, and I cringed. I shifted my gaze back to the front, recognizing the owner of the voice as the guy in front of Daniel. Would he point my staring out to Daniel? I shifted uncomfortably in the tiny desk
“You ever wonder why people do the things they do?”
I looked back over, my head in my hand, and saw Daniel had his eyes trained on me. He had removed his letterman jacket, and his blue t-shirt stretched over his muscles in an obvious way. The boy in front of him had turned back around to look through his notebook for his homework. I looked Daniel straight in the eyes, one of my eyebrows arching at his question. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I thought it was pretty obvious,” he said in a tone which doubted my intellect.
“The question was obvious, but why you’re asking isn’t.”
“You’re more concerned about the ‘why’ in life then, not the actual act?”
I decided to play along with wherever his thoughts were, curious despite my uncertainty. Maybe I would learn more about him…even if the conversation was bizarre.
“I guess I am more concerned with the ‘why’, yes. A good deed if done in the spirit of evil is still an evil deed. But, if a person does something with good intent, and that somehow turns into something bad, I would be willing to forgive them, because the ‘why’ behind the act was good….I like to imagine all the possible ‘whys’ before I leap to a conclusion. I think it helps me not judge too hastily when someone does something I don’t like. Now,” I raised an eyebrow at him, “will you tell me why you are asking?”
He smiled and looked down at his hands. He had stopped tapping. “I was wondering where you stood, if you’d thought about it at all.”
“That’s a peculiar way to initiate a conversation, don’t you think?”
“Should I have started with the old, ‘if a tree fell in the forest,’ routine? Would that have been better?”
I made a face at him. “Why you would ask a question like that at all is the puzzle, I think.”
“Yes, why was the question.” His eyes danced with mine playfully. “Can’t a guy just be curious?”
I gave him another mocking look, trying to follow his shifting moods.
“Oh, I get it. A guy can’t be curious, or think about philosophical things, if he’s a football player. We’re too stupid.”
I rolled my eyes at his assumption. I had been thinking more along the lines that people didn’t ask something like that unless they had an agenda.
“Yep. You guys are too stupid, and live too much in the present, to be truly deep. All that beer chugging and grunting gets in the way.”
“So, what, you think you’re deeper than me, because you look like you just stepped out of a Nine Inch Nails concert?”
“I prefer Black Sabbath. And no, I think I’m deeper than you, because I don’t expect people to kiss my ass.”
He actually laughed; a real laugh. I could tell from the way it reached his eyes. “I don’t expect people to kiss my ass!”
“Whether you expect it or not, they obviously do,” I replied.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
I pointed to the girls looking at him with dreamboat eyes, my face sarcastic. He turned back to me, his face wry. “Point taken.” He appraised me for a moment. “You’re kind of contentious, aren’t you?”
“No.” I sighed uncertainly, swiveling my head in my hand. “Maybe. Being contentious is better than being everyone else.”
“True…I think.”
I looked away from his strange eyes, wanting some relative clarity in order to think over our conversation. He had an easy-going familiarity I felt was partly an act but partly not. I could tell he knew how to talk to people, to make them see what he wanted them to see, but I could also tell he thought about things seriously. It drew me out and reeled me in, fascinating me more than I was willing to admit. I had never met a stranger so capable of doing that to me. But what was real? The sarcasm or the side which thought seriously about things?
Mrs. Heart started her lesson on Shakespeare then, on a play I had already studied, ending our conversation. My mind wandered as she lectured, and I glanced over at Daniel, wanting to look at his face, to puzzle out his mystery, his questions, and was surprised to see that he was looking back at me. His head was in his hand, mirroring me, except that he was tapping impatiently on the desk again. As our eyes connected, he shifted his attention back to the front but not before he gave me a look that was both mocking and smug. I frowned at the side of his face I could see, not able to follow his shifting and contradicting actions. One second he w
as angry, because I had beat him in some stupid tennis game, the next he was asking philosophical questions and staring at me like he’d never seen a girl with punk hair before. I focused again, trying to hear anything from him, even a thought of what he was going to have for dinner. I shifted through all the thoughts slowly, taking my time, so I wouldn’t miss anything, but still…nothing. Where was he?
I scowled at Mrs. Heart as she started questioning the class, my confusion making me irritable. She called on me after a moment of questions, to get a feel for what I had learned in previous schools. Her face was expressionless, but I knew she wasn’t expecting much. I decided to go for dazzle, my irritation overriding my desire to not be noticed. It was dangerous like that.
“Where did you learn that?” she asked in her squeaky voice, ignoring the whispers floating around the room.
“I was in A.P. English at my old school, but this school didn’t have it…” I trailed off feeling like my whole day had been a study in not offending anyone.
“Oh!” she said impressed. Another brain child. I don’t remember Ellen being that intellectual. Fun at parties, maybe, but not super smart. I heard a mental sigh. I don’t know if I can handle having another genius in here. Of course, Daniel has an explanation…his parents are scientists. Maybe her father is smart? I know I’ll have to pair them together, if I want the others to learn anything, but that might cause problems…
I looked over at Daniel, wondering if he had been as impressed by my answer as the others, but he wasn’t looking at me. His attention was focused on the desk he was tapping on. Irritated all over again that I was acting like a five-year-old over some boy I’d just met, I went back to looking out of the windows, gratified I’d taught the teacher not to pick on me anymore.
I stared at the trees, which were swaying slightly with the wind, and kept up a constant fidget. I searched my emotions, wondering about the interest I had. Maybe, the fascination was because I hadn’t counted on my first day being like this. I had thought it would be awkward, perhaps a little depressing, but it was suddenly interesting – not just because something about him rubbed me the wrong way, but because I wanted to unearth a little of his mystery. I wanted to know why he put on the show, why his eyes changed color, why he hid behind his popularity and his charm – I just wanted to know ‘why’. My questions had me focused on every move he made, every impatient adjustment in his chair. It was driving me crazy.
The bell, when it rang, was a relief. Daniel seemed to agree with me. He stood fluidly and started talking to the boy in front of him as they walked out the door together. A strange part of me wanted to tell him about the jealous thoughts the boy was having, but I knew I was being silly. He wouldn’t care, and he’d probably freak out if I told him how I knew. That was a major thing I had promised Ellen. No one could know about my past, my mind reading, or any of the strange things. It was what kept us safe. It was what kept us hidden.
Alex came over to where I sat unmoving. “What do you have next?”
“Chorus,” I told her, shifting my eyes away from Daniel’s retreating back.
“Me too. Come on, I’ll make sure you don’t get lost in the sheep.”
“Baahhh!”
She giggled and hooked her hand through my arm companionably as I slung my bag over my shoulder. “I noticed a certain someone staring at you in class.”
“Was it the boy in the front row who looked like he’d been flunked a couple of times?”
“Jerry? No, well, yes, but I meant Daniel.”
I tried to keep my face expressionless, but she had already seen my interest. She smiled knowingly. “Yeah, he barely took his eyes off you.”
“Wait, why were you staring?”
“Because you think he’s cute, and I wanted to know if he thought the same.” Her thoughts were in total agreement with her words. Was I that obvious? Or was she just that observant?
“Well, does he?” I asked, acknowledging how peculiar it was for me to have to rely on someone else to know what a person was thinking.
“I can’t be certain yet. He just looked confused.”
“He was probably trying to understand how I beat him at tennis.”
“No, it was more than that.”
“He probably wants to know where I get my eyeliner,” I joked.
“Not Daniel,” she replied. “He’s not the eyeliner type.”
My stomach dropped at the thought of her spreading our conversation to the school. I ardently did not want my very slim, miniscule, non-interest getting back to him. That would just give him leverage; I didn’t need someone having that kind of power on my first day. And I certainly could live without the teasing. But for some strange reason, I was convinced our conversation would remain private.
At the chorus room, Alex left my side so I could talk to the teacher. She settled herself in with the other sopranos, her thoughts circling around ways to get Daniel and me together. I sighed as I handed the teacher the slip, hoping her ideas would remain in her head. I didn’t need any crazy shenanigans in my first week; particularly potentially embarrassing shenanigans.
The last hour of class was torturous. The bell ringing was the second most beautiful sound I had heard all day. I gave Alex a brief excuse about having to turn in my paperwork then fled the classroom as quickly as I could. Alex let me leave with a smile, her mind on the plans she had with Michelle, not minding my rushed escape.
A cold wind played across my face as I walked out the large double doors, but it was refreshing after a long day indoors. It was better than the stagnate feeling of unanswered questions and an unwelcome spotlight. Feeling overwhelmed, and conflicted, I made my way through the sunny, cold afternoon with my jacket pulled tight against the wind.
Chapter 4
I unlocked the front door of my large house eagerly, glad Ellen wasn’t home yet. I needed the time to compose myself, to get my thoughts in order before anyone else’s intruded. Unlike the apartment complexes I was used to, the house provided me with enough room to do just that. It was another thing I was starting to like about the house.
Figuring that having something to do would be better than dwelling on my strange day, I spent a good forty minutes on the homework I’d been given. It was insanely easy, but it kept me occupied. When I finished my last algebra problem, I left the sanctity of my bedroom and went to cook dinner. As I put the lasagna in the oven to bake, I heard the door open and Ellen called my name.
“In here!” I called back.
She looked tired, but happy, as she walked into the bright kitchen. “Hey! How was your first day?”
“Typical-ish.”
She laughed at me. “Lots of questions, right? I told you there would be lots of questions.”
I made a face at her and went to the refrigerator to get out the salad. “How was your day?” I asked focused on washing the lettuce.
“It was good, busy, but good.”
“I met Alex Lawson today,” I said.
And a stupid boy I beat at tennis. And a bunch of kids that apparently decided to make me popular. And teachers that not only knew you when you were young but were jealous of you.
Her face brightened noticeably. “Sam’s daughter?”
“Yeah, she’s pretty cool.”
“Cool,” she replied.
I frowned, trying to remember the receptionist’s name. It came to me. “Oh, and Heather Smith or Thomas said to tell you ‘hi.’ I think she wanted you to know that she is married…to an old boyfriend of yours.”
Ellen raised a trembling hand to her mouth. I thought she was going to start crying again, her eyes filling with water. Instead, she started laughing hysterically. “Oh….that hypocrite! She hated me when we were in school together! She didn’t like the fact that I was dating James King. She had a major crush on him.” She snorted with laughter. “Figures, she would marry James’s best friend. He must have been sorry that day.” Trailing laughter down the hall, she went to go change out of her work clothes.
When the food was ready, we ate companionably as was our custom. She told me all about her day, no detail being too small, while I tried to figure out the right way to bring up something which had been bothering me since gym.
My face must have alerted her to my preoccupation, because as we washed the dishes she asked, “Are you sure everything was okay today? You seem a bit…distracted.”
“Well, no, not really.”
Her drying hand slowed, and she gave me a penetrating look.
“What?”
Her voice was serious, and I knew where her thoughts had gone. I was in the same place. It was a place I wasn’t happy about. It was our default mode: running. Despite not wanting to live in such a tiny town, I hated moving and hated the thought of facing another first day so soon after this one.
“You know about my…”
“Gift? Of course I do,” she said quickly.
She was uncomfortable, and I knew why. She felt guilty about everything that was happening to me; guilty for the curse I faced. But, I didn’t blame her, especially since she’d been honest with me about my curse. “Well, this morning in gym class I heard a girl say in her thoughts, ‘I guess it is true that the child pays for the sins of the parent,’ and I was wondering if she somehow knew?”
Ellen put down the plate and braced herself against the countertop. Her face was sad. “I don’t think she knows what you are. I think she’s just been talking to her parents.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I told you how conservative people are here?”
The Watchers Page 5