“That’s right,” I said cautiously.
She hadn’t responded to my attempts at conversation over my weeks of trying. She had moved away as soon as possible when I tried to talk to her, her thoughts angry and annoyed at my attempts. Her mental insults about my depravity didn’t hurt as much as her thoughts that I was trying to be nice, so I could be mean later. I hadn’t gotten four words from her. Admittedly, I had stopped trying. If she wanted to hate me, I would let her. That was her choice.
“In the Bible, angels don’t really have wings. Cherubs do,” she said quietly.
“I didn’t know that,” I said.
Flicking her hair in agitation, Jennifer hooked her arm through mine. She pulled me in close, a confidant to her opinion. “Don’t mind her and her crazy opinions. Her dad spends all his time preaching crazy stuff to anyone who’ll listen, but I’m afraid the only person who cares is little Amanda.”
Jennifer’s face had turned ugly. I unhooked my arm from hers, so she couldn’t control where I was walking. Alex was the only one allowed to do that, and she knew when it was okay.
“But I do mind her,” I said through clenched teeth. “She’s a person.”
I didn’t like people telling me what to think. It was bad enough I had to hear their thoughts, but wanting me to join in on them? Thanks, but no thanks.
Michelle and Jennifer exchanged a look. I knew, despite not hearing their thoughts, they were thinking the same thing: regret for making me cool and letting me hang out with them.
Daniel gave me a warning look and casually threw his arms over both girls’ shoulders, drawing them close. “My money says Mark shoots himself with an arrow. Who wants to take that bet?”
Both girls giggled and let him steer them to where Mark was already waiting at the targets, bow in hand. His excited face was comical against Daniel’s comment. Still seething from her awfulness, I watched them walk away. It was all I could do not to follow them and hit Jennifer right between her snobby eyes. Watching Daniel steer them to the targets bothered me in another way. I was jealous he hadn’t once touched me like that, that he hadn’t touched me at all, even though we’d spent a good portion of our time outside of school hanging out, including the past weekend – when Ellen had left to visit an old friend in Greenville. I was also grateful. Somewhere along the line, Daniel had picked up people skills that I lacked. Or rather, he had picked up the ability to please people but not let them have power over him. It was another skill he possessed that I didn’t. I was more ‘all or nothing’.
Amanda walked next to me in awkward silence and, as Daniel walked ahead with the others, I was gradually able to hear her thoughts. This doesn’t mean she’s any different. She’s probably just luring me into something. I know how they can be. I used to be like that. I heard a mental sigh. Children always pay for the sin of the parent.
“I like your necklace,” I said, searching for something to say, wanting to take advantage of the fact she was speaking to me.
She looked down at her cross necklace she had unconsciously been playing with. “Thanks. My grandma gave it to me.”
How dare she talk to her! She’ll pay for that!
I stopped walking, shocked to hear that voice again after a month of silence. I looked around the field carefully, but couldn’t see anyone, or anything, that looked out of place. My heart raced as adrenaline surged through me. I had forgotten about the voice during my weeks here. I wondered if I had missed hearing it because Daniel was around so much, blocking out the others in that strange way of his, or if it just hadn’t been around. A revelation came to me. Could that evil voice have anything to do with the attacks, which were still happening, including a farmer’s entire herd of cows this past week? It was evil enough, and certainly had murder on the brain.
Amanda stopped walking, concern coloring her face. What’s she doing? Did I do something wrong?
For the first time, I realized the mystery voice I had been hearing was male. Not only was it male, but something about the tonal quality was similar to Amanda’s voice. It was as if they had learned to speak in the same place.
“Are you okay?” she asked, fearing I would lash out at her.
I bent down and started untying my shoelaces. “Yeah. I think I’ve got a rock in my shoe. You go ahead.”
She walked off and joined the rest of the class. I peeked behind me, feeling like the woods, which were utterly everywhere in this small town, were closing in. The vision of the animal I had seen running behind my house became superimposed over the woods I was looking at. Could that explain the thoughts? Was that what I was hearing? Could bears think human thoughts?
I could kill her now. I could kill her and Marcus would never know it was me. He said to watch, to figure her out, but I’m done watching. There’s nothing to learn. I could make it look like an accident. He went through different ways of killing me. The thoughts trailed away, but before they did I heard: Her very presence is an affront to God! She will pay for her sin!
I felt my stomach drop. Those thoughts meant me. They were just too close to the mark for them to mean anyone else. I looked around, wanting a reprieve from the hatred the voice was funneling my way, and saw Daniel looking at the woods as well, his face distant, his eyes narrowed. Did that look mean what I thought it meant? When he felt my eyes on his face, Daniel’s eyes dropped back down to earth. He smiled and gestured for me to take the spot next to him. Running to his side, I took the bow he was offering and pulled the silence and calm his presence brought to my brain. I wrapped it around me as added insulation against what I had just heard. Was it even possible for normal people to have thoughts that horrible? I took a deep breath to steady my trembling.
He leaned in close and whispered, “An angel? Where?”
I couldn’t help but smile despite my fear. What would he say if I told him he was looking at one? Well, half of one.
“You’ll only find out by accident,” I replied.
“I could get the whole class involved in another round of the guessing game…”
I stuck my tongue out at him and knocked an arrow. Concentrating, I released it with a sharp “twang!” It hit the bull’s-eye.
“Nice shot,” he said. His face filled with macho superiority. “But this is how the pros do it.”
He raised the bow, took aim, and released, all in one fluid movement. The arrow hit dead center.
“Are you on magic pills that make you good at everything you do?” I asked grumpily.
I’d learned a lot over the course of our weeks together, including the fact that Daniel was practically perfect at anything he tried. There wasn’t a sport he didn’t play and a skill he hadn’t mastered. And – because I didn’t feel inadequate enough – if his parents weren’t so serious about him having the high school experience, he could be at Harvard by now.
His voice had laughter in it. “No. If I had magic pills, they’d do more than just make me good at sports.”
“What would they do?” I asked.
I released another arrow, trying for center and missing. Daniel shrugged and released his arrow. He didn’t even look at the target, but it hit dead center, almost in the same spot as the first one.
“They’d let me hear what people were thinking, they’d give me the ability to see the future, and they’d give me super hearing and super strength. They might even give me the ability to heal myself and breathe a long time underwater if I were lucky.”
I turned to him, an eyebrow raised. “Is that all?”
“No, there’s more.”
“So, even though you’re super athletic and super smart, you’d still like to borrow some of Superman’s abilities?” I said grinning.
“Of course, I would. Every guy wants to be Superman.”
“I second that!” Mark said. He leaned around Daniel to steal an arrow, not wanting to walk the distance to get his, and winked at me. “It’s a bird! It’s a plane! No! It’s Mark!”
Daniel laughed that strange laugh, which n
ever quite seemed to reach his eyes. “It’s a mutant! It’s an alien! No! It’s Mark!”
The girls beyond Mark laughed. Winking at me again, Mark turned back to his target. In an attempt at reclaiming his dignity, he started showing off for the girls. He flexed his muscles as he warmed up for his next shot. I rolled my eyes.
“I think you should be careful what you ask for,” I whispered to Daniel, so the others wouldn’t hear. “Being able to see the future would be awesome, but I think some of the other things could be very bad.”
“Like what?” he asked, not even bothering with the targets anymore. Coach was talking to a boy about the basketball lineup and ignoring the class entirely. The only way he would notice we weren’t participating was if a building blew up; if even that would get his attention.
“Like hearing what people think,” I said cautiously. “I think that would be quite a burden to have to bear. Imagine the silly and spiteful things people would think.” My eyes moved to Jennifer, Mark, and Michelle.
“But I’d be able to control my abilities, so it would be okay.”
“Oh, I see.” I knocked another arrow to avoid looking at him. “Let me know how that works out for you.” I released the arrow with a spiteful snap.
“Do you think things like that are possible?”
I turned to face him. His face was thoughtful and serious.
“Anything is possible, I guess,” I said, uncomfortably aware he was looking to start a conversation on the subject.
He was always looking for conversations like that, testing my ideas and perceptions every chance he got. I had come to expect as much from him, but I didn’t really want to talk about this. Not when it was so close to the truth. I didn’t want to lie. Especially since I knew he would see through them.
Daniel took a step closer, bringing his magnetic field with him. “There’s a theory out there that people only use about ten percent of their brains,” he began.
“I know I do.”
He smirked then continued very seriously, “Imagine if they used even five percent more…What could they accomplish at twenty percent or thirty percent more? Could things like telling the future, or going back in time, or whatever, be possible if people simply used more of their brains?”
“I haven’t thought about it,” I said despite being uncomfortable with the topic we were on. “But I think it’s an interesting idea. I think people spend a lot of their time not tapping into their true potential.”
“How do you think we could unlock that potential?”
“I don’t know, maybe by altering people’s genes? We know mutations occur; evolution is proof of that. If we could somehow tap into the genome and alter a person’s basic DNA structure maybe that would allow them to use more of their brain. Force a mutation, you know? If we alter it in the proper way, evolution would take over and people would start being born stronger, using more of their brains. We would have to be careful to trigger the right things, though, or else we could make monsters, or horrible diseases, or something else bad.”
“You have thought about it!” His eyes were very bright.
“Not really.” And I hadn’t. I had just spouted off my first thought without pausing to consider them. That happened a lot around him.
Daniel stepped even closer. I had to lean back to be able to breathe normally. “What if, instead of altering the genes through experiments, we altered the genes through basic inheritance?”
“How do you mean?”
“Someone who uses more of their brain mates and has kids. Their kids, because of simple genetics, would be born with enhanced abilities and strengths. And if those kids mated with other kids that used more of their brain…you get the picture?”
My heart skipped a beat. “Finding a person or people with those abilities in the first place would be the trick I think.”
“Sort of like the chicken and the egg dilemma?”
“Yeah. Which came first, the super human, or the super human powers?” I chuckled darkly.
Daniel didn’t join my laugh. His eyes were still sparkling with curiosity and interest. Then, he noticed Mark and Jennifer eyeing us curiously and moved away. We were silent for a while, shooting at the targets and listening to the people near us horsing off. I was frantically trying to figure out if Daniel somehow knew about me, if he had noticed me responding to someone’s thoughts. No, that wasn’t possible. I couldn’t hear people when he was around. I wasn’t comfortable with his talk about inheriting genes from super humans, though. It was too close to the truth.
My muscles tensed with a familiar fight or flight response. When people got too close to the truth, we ran. It was instinct now. It was what Ellen and I had spent over a decade perfecting. My stomach sank as I thought of Ellen. She was fitting in so beautifully here. She had friends, and Sam had been over twice more for dinner without me having to play Cupid. She had laughed more with him than I had seen her laugh in years. She was settled, finally able to relax after a life spent in one big move. She thought, hoped, our running was through. This place had turned into a refuge; had turned into a home. Could I take that away from her? Was it right for me to overreact to every innocent conversation? I didn’t want to be found by the others, but I didn’t like Ellen having to give up so much for my sake. It wasn’t fair to her. Admittedly, I had more selfish reasons for not wanting to run. I found myself liking King’s Cross. It was quiet and unabashedly remote, but there was a certain peace I needed. There was a calm I had never experienced in the city.
I thought about Daniel’s parents and relaxed, my muscles unknotting. They were a plausible reason for his interest. They were scientists, so they probably talked to him about such things. From his vague descriptions, I gathered that they were constantly interested in the ‘why,’ always taking things apart to understand them. Maybe, they longed to take humans apart to see how their brains worked.
“What’s your parents’ field of study?” I asked over the tension that had sprung up between us. I’d not asked him that yet.
He hesitated before releasing his arrow. “Genetics is their main focus, but they play around with all the fields. They love to invent things.”
“Ah.”
“Why?”
His face was twisted into a question, but his eyes were on the woods again. I wanted to ask him if he saw anything there. The evil thoughts I’d heard had come from near where he was looking.
Instead, I said, “I was just wondering why you would have such weird thoughts about superpowers and the like.”
“You think it’s odd?”
“Wanting to be more than we are is human nature, but dwelling on it doesn’t seem healthy,” I said seriously. “Especially when those things, as far as you’re concerned, aren’t possible.”
“Hm. Good thing I don’t dwell on it.”
“Back to the lockers! Leave the bows and arrows where you found them!” Coach called over the talking students, a look of disinterest in his bloodshot eyes.
I walked with Daniel towards the gym in mutually thoughtful silence. I sensed he didn’t feel like talking, but I didn’t take offense. Over our weeks together, we had developed a respect for each other’s silent moments. Though we were silent, my mind was far from peaceful. I glanced back to search the woods for some sign of the evil thoughts and noticed Amanda, her shoulders hunched, at the back of the crowd. She was looking down, but something in the crease of her forehead worried me. It went way beyond thoughtful silence.
“Daniel?”
“Yes?”
“Do me a favor?”
“Yes.”
“Walk away.”
“Excuse me?”
“Just go walk up with the others about 100 feet away from me,” I said. “Please.”
I sounded strange, but I didn’t care. I needed to be able to hear. My gut was telling me it was important. He walked off without a word, though his odd expression spoke volumes. The voices started swirling again, starting out muffled, but gradually incre
asing in volume until they were at normal level. I sorted through the visions and chatter until I found Amanda’s.
I’m just sick of all this. Why can’t I just have one thing that works out? She had broken her bow accidently and had spent the whole class unable to join the fun. Does God hate me? God hates me. He knows about my mother. He knows about my father. I’m being punished. Oh, what’s the point?
An image of a beautifully sheltered spot next to a large river floated through my head. I didn’t recognize it, but it made me feel uneasy, as if I had witnessed something horrible there. Before her vision changed back to thoughts of her next class, I noticed a small bridge with graffiti on it and a road made of dirt and gravel trailing along the edge of the water.
The poor kid really was depressed. Even though Amanda wouldn’t talk to me, and hated me for my ‘popularity,’ I wanted to help her. With Alex and Daniel as backup, I could probably get Jennifer to leave her alone and give her some peace from the teasing. Despite Jennifer looking and acting the part of the queen bee of the high school, Alex and Daniel were really the ones in control. Alex’s power resided in the respect everyone had for her, and her ability to keep secrets. Daniel’s power was because he was beautiful, charming, and quite possibly the most brilliant person to walk the school halls. Not that I was biased in any way.
I caught up with Daniel again as we were passing the large structure which housed the pool, my curiosity sated. I would find a way to help Amanda, even if she didn’t know I had a hand in it. It gave me purpose. The pool bordered the back of the school, flush with the woods and looked odd against the brick of the main buildings. It was a donation from Daniel’s parents, so he could form a swim team. I had heard he had led them to State. Go team.
“The Shadow was way cooler than Superman,” I said as if I hadn’t just forced him to walk away from me without an explanation.
He stopped abruptly and ran a hand through his hair. His face said I’d caught him thinking about something especially serious. He hid his gravity with a mocking smile. “Where on earth did you get that reference from?”
“Oh, come on! You don’t know who the Shadow is?!”
The Watchers Page 11