“She didn’t like it, man, get over it,” said Mech. “She called the kid Cal, what more do you want?”
Cal shifted in his chair and gave a begrudging shrug. “Yeah, that was pretty cool, I suppose. But still. Santa.”
“Think she’s going to be OK?” asked Loren, leaning back on the stick and tilting the ship’s nose off the deck. “Staying here, I mean?”
“Well, no-one’s looking for her now, are they?” said Miz. “And, like, she’s got a baby that can blow stuff up.”
“Yeah,” said Cal. “Yeah, I think she’ll be fine.”
The ship edged towards the wide doors that led out into the vastness of outer space. Mech’s metal feet clanked across the deck, and Cal turned in time for a pair of leather boots to be thrust towards him.
“Merry Kroyshuk,” Mech grunted.
“Aw, Mech, you shouldn’t have!” Cal said, taking the boots. “I didn’t get you anything.”
He tilted the boots, studying them. “A matching pair, about the right size, nice leatherwork. These are perfect, Mech, thank you.”
Mech nodded. “Hey, no problem. My pleasure,” he said, returning to his spot.
Cal crossed his legs. He was about to pull one of the boots on, when something inside it caught his attention. He peered inside and his stomach did a little loop-the-loop.
“Uh, you do know there are still feet inside these, right?”
“Yeah,” said Mech, his metal mouth curving into a smirk. “Yeah, I know.”
And then the stars all stretched out, and the Shatner shot off into space, leaving the North Star, Morana, and the newborn boy child far, far behind.
SPACE TEAM
A hilarious, fast-paced space adventure from the author the Independent calls "the new Terry Pratchett."
Cal Carver is having a bad day. Imprisoned and forced to share a cell with a cannibalistic serial killer, Cal thinks things can't possibly get any worse.
He is wrong.
It’s not until two-thirds of the human race is wiped out and Cal is abducted by aliens that his day really starts to go downhill.
Whisked across the galaxy, Cal is thrown into a team of some of the sector's most notorious villains and scumbags. Their mission should be simple enough, but as one screw-up leads to another, they find themselves in a frantic battle to save an entire alien civilization - and its god - from total annihilation.
Read Space Team Now
SPACE TEAM: THE WRATH OF VAJAZZLE
Suicide Squad meets Galaxy Quest, in this fast-paced, laugh-out-loud novel from the author the Independent calls, "the new Terry Pratchett."
After saving an alien race and its god from a sentient zombie virus, Cal Carver and the crew of the Dread Ship Shatner are feeling pretty pleased with themselves.
Unfortunately, the creator of the zombie virus is out for revenge, and has recruited the galaxy's deadliest - and oldest - assassin, Lady Vajazzle, to hunt Space Team down. But when Vajazzle discovers the crew is under the protection of a species known as the Greyx, she is forced to implement a Plan B so diabolical it threatens to plunge the entire star system into chaos.
With time running out, Cal must find a way to outmaneuver and outgun the galaxy's greatest killer before she murders his friends, butchers the Greyx, and buys the whole galaxy a one-way ticket to total annihilation.
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Space Team: The Holiday Special Page 7