If only she could forget about the soft touch of his lips the night before. If only she could shut her eyes to the captivating sight of his strong, muscular form.
What would he do if she let him stay? How far would he take this, and more importantly, how far would she allow it to go? She didn’t want to be the sort of woman who lived up to her notorious reputation, but this was so very difficult.
He reached the bed and paused at the foot of it. “May I join you?”
“Yes,” she impulsively replied, than made one last effort to behave somewhat respectably. “But only if you promise to remember that we are not yet married. Can I trust you?”
A lazy grin touched his lips and he squinted at her. “I’m not sure. Should I leave?”
Damn him. Her body was on fire. She could no more tell him to leave than she could stop herself from breathing.
Though she gave no reply, she supposed her expression was enough, for he leisurely moved around the bed and slid under the covers beside her.
Determined to cling to the safe haven of their earlier conversation—which was far less risky than the wild attraction presently firing her blood—Anne rolled to face Garrett and rested her cheek on her palm.
“In the corridor you asked me how much I knew about you and your father, but you revealed nothing after that. Now I am curious to know why the two of you were not close.”
Garrett rolled to face her. “Now I feel foolish,” he said. “I thought you invited me in here to seduce me.”
She should have been unsettled by the suggestion, but instead, she was wickedly aroused.
“Garrett,” she whispered. “You promised.”
“Did I?” His tone was playful, teasing, enthralling.
“It was implied,” she said, “and my curiosity must be satisfied.” She struggled to keep the conversation going, not to let her passions take over. “There seem to be many secrets at Pembroke. What happened between you and your father? Why did you leave here all those years ago and not return for seven years?”
He rolled onto his back and stared up at the canopy. The firelight danced on the walls and the flames crackled noisily in the hearth. “I will be blunt, Anne, because you should know the truth. Charlotte and I are not true Sinclairs. Not by blood at least. The duke is not our true father.”
Surprised, Anne leaned up on an elbow. “Does he know?”
Garrett turned his head on the pillow to look at her. “Yes. He’s always known. I don’t know how, exactly. Perhaps Mother simply told him, or he recognized that we looked nothing like him. All I know is that it was never a happy marriage and he despised me quite openly, for I represented all that he could not control. My mother, specifically.” Garrett paused and studied Anne’s face. She nodded and he continued.
“He treated me like dirt under his boot. If he was not shouting at me or punishing me for something I hadn’t done, he was simply ignoring me, treating me as if I were invisible. On the day I left, he had spotted me in the garden with a very highborn young lady with a blood connection to the Queen. He called me inside and told me I should stay away from her, that if one of his sons should have her, it would be Devon. It was the last straw. I told him to go choke on his opinions, and that I would court whomever I damn well pleased. He knocked me around a bit, gave me a bloody lip, but I wasn’t a child anymore. I fought back and swung a chair at him.”
“Good heavens.”
“I swore it would be the last time he would ever raise a hand to me, and it was.”
Anne digested all of this. “Were you in love with that girl?”
Garrett shook his head. “No, we were just friends, but it was a matter of principle. I left for Greece the very next day. Father provided me with an allowance under the condition that I stay away, but informed me that upon his death, I would not receive any inheritance. It was no great surprise. I always knew I would never inherit the title, even if something happened to my older brothers. He made that very clear to me early on.” Garrett looked at her. “So if you thought you were marrying a man who is fourth in line to a dukedom, that will never be the case.”
“I didn’t expect to be a duchess,” she assured him. “That is not why I accepted this proposal...but you already knew that.” She had been very forthcoming about her motivations to engage in this ruse.
He nodded.
“I suppose,” she continued, “you could call me a fortune hunter, in a sense, but not a social climber, at least.”
Anne continued to gaze at him in the dim firelight, while her body hummed with physical awareness. “Do you know who your real father is?” she asked.
“No.”
“Are you curious about it?”
He breathed deeply. “Sometimes.”
All of a sudden, Garrett sat up and leaned on one arm to face her. Instinctively, she lay back on the pillows.
“What you said to me last night,” he whispered, changing the subject entirely, “about being an easy conquest... I never presumed that about you and I certainly didn’t intend to treat you that way.”
“I’m surprised to hear that,” she replied, feeling defensive, “because that’s what everyone else presumed when I was surrounded by scandal. People sent me cruel letters. Some were anonymous, other were signed. My father disowned me and called me a whore. But that is not what I am, Garrett, and I will not be defined by my past, nor will I harbor bitterness toward those who wronged me. Instead I will pity them, for they do not know compassion or forgiveness.”
He gently stroked her cheek with the pad of his finger. “I am sorry that happened to you.”
A brief shiver rippled through her.
“If I was disrespectful last night, I apologize,” he added, stroking her hair away from her face.
Anne’s breath came short at the pleasure of his touch and his soft breath fanning her face.
But still, she fought to quell her desires, for she did not wish to be a wanton woman that men leered at.
“Yet here you are,” she said, “slipping into my bed during the first week of our acquaintance.”
His head drew back. “You can trust me. I won’t try to make love to you. Not unless you invite me to.”
“I am not...” She hesitated. “I am not inviting you.”
For a long moment he gazed into her eyes. Then he nodded. “I understand.”
But he didn’t roll away, get out of the bed, make for the door. He continued to lean over her, stroking her cheek, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear.
Pleasantly surprised by this unexpected tenderness, which was more seductive than the most blatant flirtation, she asked, “Why aren’t you leaving?”
“Do you want me to?”
“No.”
“Then I will stay if you have no objections. We can just talk, or lie here together and not say a word.”
She paused, certain it was some kind of trick, because a fiery passion was sizzling between them. She could feel it everywhere—in her heart, her mind, her body.
“Why?”
He shrugged casually, but there was something melancholy in his voice when he spoke. “I don’t sleep well. I have unpleasant dreams.”
She reached out to lay a hand on his cheek. “Do you dream about the accident?”
He nodded.
The firelight flickered in the room while she ran her fingers through his thick, wavy hair. “Then stay...for a while,” she said. “I am inviting you to do that, at least.”
He gazed down at her for long time. “May I kiss you?” he asked. “Just one kiss.”
She should say no. She should not let it go any further, but she wanted to know him more deeply. Just having his body next to hers, quickened her blood. The thought of kissing him was too tempting to resist. No amount of self-restraint was powerful enough to stop her.
“Yes, I’d like that.”
She wanted his mouth on hers now, this instant, to feel the intimacy of another soul-reaching kiss. Shamelessly, she reached out to take his face in
her hands and pull him closer.
In response, he slid a hand down the side of her body as their lips met and their tongues mingled hotly in the quiet wintry night.
Again, smoldering sensation overwhelmed better judgement. Anne wanted Garrett desperately. She wanted this blissful passion from him.
He devoured her mouth. Her body ached for more, yet her emotions were in tumult. After everything she just said to him about how she would not be defined by her reputation, she was falling under a handsome man’s spell yet again, like some light-skirted strumpet.
Then, just when she felt certain she would lose the fight and surrender completely and shamelessly to the storm of passion that was pulsing through her body, Garrett brought the kiss to a smooth, enchanting finish. The kiss continued to linger upon her lips even as he drew away to look down at her.
With her breath held and heart beating fast, she blinked up at him.
“That was nice,” he whispered, and she nodded in return.
He relaxed on the bed beside her and gathered her into his arms.
Anne finally exhaled and rested her cheek on his shoulder.
This was not what she had expected when she’d invited him into her room, but it was perfect—all of it—for she’d enjoyed the kiss she had been daydreaming about. Now she was lying beside him, safe and warm in his arms. She let her eyes fall closed and began to relax, even while her body still trembled with desire...
When she opened her eyes, she was surprised to discover it was morning and the sun was beaming in through the windows.
Anne sat up.
Garrett was gone. He must have left her bed sometime during the night.
He had kept his promise. He had not tried to make love to her. She was relieved to have made it through the night, free of ravishment, but as she rose to get dressed, she realized with a heavy pang of unease that it only made her want him more.
How was she ever going to survive until the wedding night?
Chapter Eight
The annual children’s Christmas concert at the church hall in the village was a cozy affair for the aristocratic ladies of Pembroke Palace, and a very special occasion for Anne, who had not set foot in church since that disheartening day four years ago, when she had been so firmly cast out by the members of her community.
Today, there was only charity and mirth in the air. Evergreen wreaths were hung on the post of every pew, and each family was permitted to take one home to decorate their door. The choral music was both moving and cheerful with the jingle of sleigh bells to accompany the children’s voices.
Afterward the ladies enjoyed a light lunch of egg salad sandwiches and fruitcake, and hot mulled cider to drink.
While Anne watched the young mothers with their small children, she envied their conventional lives. She had chosen a very different path—one of personal freedom and financial security—but the events of the past few days had caused her to doubt her decision. She was growing melancholy over the idea that she’d never have a true marriage with a man who was passionately devoted her, heart, body, and soul.
She had not expected to feel such an intense attraction to her betrothed, nor had she expected to mix so comfortably with his sister, his brothers, and their wives.
She raised a cup of cider to her lips and sipped the last few drops while the vicar thanked everyone for attending the concert. He asked that they leave a donation for the less fortunate as they departed.
Anne glanced up with surprise when Charlotte touched her arm. “Are you ready to leave?”
“Yes, I beg your pardon. I was lost in thought.”
She joined Charlotte, Rebecca, Chelsea, and the duchess, and together they made their way to the coach. The women waved at the villagers as they drove off.
As soon as they were underway, the duchess clasped Anne’s gloved hand. “My dearest Lady Anne,” she said, “I hope we have made you feel welcome here at Pembroke.”
Anne felt all the other ladies staring at her intently, waiting eagerly for her to reply.
“You have, Your Grace. I cannot thank you enough for your hospitality.”
“Please, you must call me Adelaide,” the duchess replied. “And we are all so pleased to have you with us, aren’t we girls?”
Charlotte, Rebecca, and Chelsea all nodded their heads in enthusiastic agreement.
Anne regarded them with bewilderment. “What is going on? I feel as if you are about to pounce on me with some extraordinary piece of news.”
Adelaide squeezed her hand. “We would never pounce, Lady Anne, but I confess we have conspired to speak to you privately today.”
A flash of anxiety sparked within her. “Have I done something wrong?”
Did they know? Had the duchess somehow discovered that Anne was having wicked, indecent thoughts about her son...that she wanted to debauch him?
“Of course not,” Adelaide replied. “To the contrary, you have done everything right, Lady Anne. We absolutely adore you. Even the duke cannot stop singing your praises. He thinks you are the most charming creature alive, the last piece of the puzzle that will end the Pembroke Palace curse once and for all.”
Anne took the compliment in stride, but it all seemed rather silly, for there really was no curse and they all knew it. The duke was losing his mind, and she was being paid to be charming.
“I am pleased to hear it,” she said nevertheless.
The coach rumbled through the slush and snow, while Anne continued to sit beside the duchess, facing the other three ladies on the opposite seat. They were all staring at her with bright smiling faces.
“We wish to make you a proposition,” Charlotte said at last. “And we hope you will consider it.”
Anne regarded them uncertainly. “Another proposition? After the last one your brothers proposed in my uncle’s drawing room, I cannot imagine what it might be.”
They all laughed graciously as if she were the most witty person on earth, and she wondered if something had been added to the hot cider back at the church hall.
The duchess patted her hand. “It’s nothing outrageous, Lady Anne. We simply want you to know that you are welcome to stay at Pembroke Palace as long as you wish. We understand that you signed some sort of document agreeing to leave after the wedding when Garrett returns to Greece, but those terms were drawn up before any of us had a chance to meet you. Devon and Blake quite agree that you fit in well here.
“We feel that if you marry Garrett, you should be treated as a true member of the family. I daresay you will be my beloved daughter-in-law whether or not my son remains in England. We therefore want you to know that we would all be honored and pleased if you were to decide to remain here with us.”
Anne couldn’t speak for a moment. This was wholly unexpected. “Does Garrett know about this? Has he agreed to it as well?”
Charlotte and the duchess locked gazes. Anne knew immediately that the answer was no.
“We haven’t spoken to him about it yet,” Charlotte explained. “Mostly because we don’t want to put pressure on him. We are quite sure he has not changed his mind about returning to Greece. At least not yet. He says he still wants to remain a bachelor and live elsewhere.”
“Which is why it won’t make any difference to him whether you stay or go,” the duchess added.
Anne cleared her throat. “I will have to consult the terms of the contract, but I believe it stipulates that I, too, will live elsewhere. If I stay, I could be in breach, and therefore would lose the annuity that is promised to me.”
The others were quiet.
“Perhaps we could draw up a new contract that allows you more freedom to live where you choose?” Chelsea suggested.
“Garrett would have to sign it,” Anne replied, “and I am not comfortable proposing such a thing to him. Please do not misunderstand—I like your son very much, Adelaide. But I do not wish to burden him or put him in an awkward situation should he not wish to change the terms. I really think we should leave everything as it is
.” She paused, then shook her head. “He does not want a true wife, and I do not wish to try and change his mind.”
But why not? she asked herself. Wouldn’t it be a dream come true to have him as a husband who would genuinely love her, pleasure her, share a bed with her, be devoted to her?
Of course it would be, but that was nothing but a pipe dream, an existence he did not want, and she certainly didn’t come here to put herself in the painful position of getting her heart broken again. She had resolved to be independent and not rely on any man, for she had suffered at the hands of every man she had ever trusted.
She’d already made things more difficult for herself by kissing Garrett and dreaming about him romantically, but she could not rely on him to rescue her.
An uncomfortable silence ensued while the coach wheels sliced through the soft, melting snow.
“But you both seem so well-suited to each other,” Charlotte said with disappointment. “I thought perhaps there was a chance you might fall in love, and that he might choose to stay as well.”
Anne regarded Charlotte with understanding. “It is clear you love your brother very much,” she said. “I cannot blame you. He is a wonderful man, but the truth is...I cannot pin my hopes on him. He has made it clear to me that he is not seeking a life of matrimony in the conventional sense. Please understand that I must protect myself.”
Eventually, the duchess patted her hand. “We understand,” she reluctantly said. “But this offer will remain in effect. Once you marry my son, you will always be welcome here, Anne. If you ever want for anything, anything at all, you need only ask.”
Anne thanked her and gazed out the window. It was important that she try and forget about their proposition, for it would not be wise to dream about a life—and a love—that was beyond her grasp. Garrett did not want a true marriage and she must honor that.
She felt Charlotte’s eyes on her suddenly and pasted on a smile in an effort to appear comfortable with her decision.
Charlotte smiled at her in return, but the rest of the coach ride was filled with light conversations about the weather, while Anne felt completely and utterly exposed.
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