“And I just lost you again,” Cathy said. “Seriously, sometimes I wonder where you’ve been going lately.”
“Sorry.” Becca grimaced. “I’ve just had a lot on my mind.”
To Becca’s relief, Cathy seemed to let it slide as they finished their coffee and renewed their search for party supplies.
Cathy knew how to shop. And she knew how to talk. She had a way of talking endlessly, but in a way which ended up drawing more information out of her companion than she managed to offer of her own. Becca had eventually spilled the beans on the photography session with Evan—although she hadn’t admitted that it happened the same night she’d taken the plunge with Drew. Cathy had hmm’d and uhuh’d her way through that part of the conversation, a knowing look in her eye that Becca didn’t want to acknowledge.
It was almost a relief when Becca was able to leave Cathy and return home.
“You look tired.” Evan’s greeting was filled with concern and fueled the lethargy that had seemed to settle into Becca’s body. With gentle hands around the tops of her arms, he guided her to the sofa so she could sit.
He knelt on the floor in front of her and lifted one of her legs into his hands. Before she could resist, her foot was in his hands as his fingers gently kneaded the sole.
It was hard, but she resisted the urge to moan at how good the feeling was after a long day on her feet. Instead, she closed her eyes and leaned her head against the back of the sofa, allowing it to cushion her whole body. “Shopping and Cathy are always a dangerous combination.”
Evan chuckled as his fingers moved to massage the top of her foot.
A few moments of companionable silence passed between them where Becca tried desperately to swallow down all of her moans of pleasure. Although she was certain some escaped, Evan was gentlemanly enough not to mention it. She was relieved to find that the awkwardness of the morning had completely dissipated.
“You sure know how to treat a lady,” she murmured as he placed her foot back onto the floor and started on the other one.
Evan didn’t respond, he was so quiet in fact that if it wasn’t for the gentle pressure on her feet, she wouldn’t have even known he was there. The thought worried her, and made her mind turn once more to a subject she’d tried to avoid like the plague but which she couldn’t ignore any longer—not if she wanted to keep her sanity in check.
“How will you know when it’s time for you to leave for good?” she asked in a voice that was little more than a whisper. It was one of the multitude of questions racing around her mind—part of what had been distracting her most of the day.
His fingers stopped moving.
She opened her eyes and looked down at him.
He blinked up at her a few times. “It’s not usually for good,” he said without conviction. “You might not know I’m there, but as long as you feel love I’ll be there.” He placed her foot on the floor and leaned forward over her legs. “I’ll be here.” He placed two fingers over her heart. Despite his words, which were the best she could have hoped to hear, he looked so sad.
She sat up and brushed a strand of hair off his face. “I like the sound of that.”
He smiled weakly up at her and then he stood to walk away. The sound of a tap from the bathroom indicated that he’d gone to wash his hands. When he walked back into the room, more of Becca’s questions were on her lips but then the doorbell rang, interrupting her.
When she pulled the door open, Drew was standing on her stoop. He looked immaculate and the sight of him reminded her of the way he’d controlled her body and drawn every ounce of pleasure from her. She was a little surprised to see him. It wasn’t that she’d forgotten that Drew was coming, but she’d just lost track of the time.
“Sorry, I know I’m late. Work was hell,” he said as he ducked his head to kiss her. His lips had barely grazed hers before Becca twisted her head to see if Evan was still standing in her living room.
She said a silent prayer of thanks that he wasn’t. If Drew had found Evan in her house, it wouldn’t have been a great start to her evening. In fact, it would have erupted in yet another argument about her little cupid. Drew didn’t understand why Evan was part of her life, and it didn’t help that there was so much about her relationship with her cupid that she just couldn’t explain.
“That’s okay,” she said in response to Drew’s apology. “I don’t mind.”
“We’re eating in tonight,” Drew said, presenting two salads to her.
Looking at the meagre offering, Becca’s stomach growled. She’d skipped lunch and hadn’t eaten anything all day but a piece of toast and a coffee. “Maybe we should order in pizza?”
Drew’s mouth scrunched up in disapproval. “What’s wrong with this? At least it won’t give you a heart attack.”
“Of course.” Becca gave a weak smile as she nodded. It wasn’t the first time he’d made a remark about her food choices, and more often than not on dates he ordered long before she even had a chance to look at her menu. At first it had been flattering, but now it just irritated her.
As she led Drew through to the dining table, she reminded herself of all the positives he had. He was generous and caring. He was attractive and fantastic in bed—or at least she was willing to give him the benefit of doubt on that one after his last performance. He was an amazing doctor and really cared about his patients. He cared about her.
It wasn’t really his fault that his hours at the hospital were longer than he’d anticipated considering it was such a small place. Or that his constant suggestions for healthier food choices were just a product of his interest in cardiothoracic surgery. Neither was he to blame that his natural charisma and perfect appearance attracted women to his side like flies. The fact that he grew jealous anytime she even dared to mention Evan’s name was a little more annoying, but Becca had learned to get around that by just not talking about Evan to Drew at all.
“Eat up,” Drew said, obviously noticing that Becca hadn’t started on her salad even though he was almost halfway through his. “You’ll need your strength tonight because I’ve got plans for you.”
Becca didn’t miss the wicked intent in his voice, or the way it made her body clench in anticipation. As she tucked into the small salad that was supposed to be her dinner, she decided that for the benefits she reaped from being with Drew, she could overlook a few small shortcomings.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Evan was finding it so hard to be around Becca. Every time he tried, the words “I love you” were on the very edge of his tongue ready to spill out. His lips were poised ready to either form the words or kiss her. It was only his mantra that she wanted Drew that kept him from doing either. Despite how hard it was to be near her, Evan craved it like nothing else.
Unfortunately, it was hard trying to vie for Becca’s attention around work, Drew, and her photography. Some days, he was lucky to get half an hour with her before she crashed into bed or while she finished getting dressed for her latest date with Drew.
On very rare, and very special, occasions, they spent a decent amount of time together in her darkroom while she developed some of the old negatives that she hadn’t been able to get to since Evan himself had come crashing into her life and had flipped it all upside-down. All the while, he waited for that inevitable moment when he would either be given a new assignment or taken from the Earth to be granted his final “reward.” Not that he considered anything that took him from Becca’s side a reward. Not anymore.
As the day of her birthday drew closer, she had even less time for him because she and Cathy were constantly together to set up all of the party arrangements and Drew seemed desperate to spend all of his spare time with her, taking her on dates almost every night. Despite Becca bringing him home after most of those dates, he never stayed the night though. A fact for which Evan was eternally grateful. He wasn’t sure he could have spent the night having to deal with their emotions while they slept side by side.
For the entire week bef
ore the party, Becca didn’t once go into the darkroom, and Evan didn’t see her at all. He’d wait for her at the kitchen table in the morning, only to have her call out a goodbye as she raced from the door after rising late. He’d wait by her bedroom while she got changed only to have Drew knock on the front door long before Becca was ready, cutting off their chance to talk before it really began. He hated it, and could feel Becca’s frustration rising, too.
He couldn’t pinpoint what it was precisely that was worrying her, not without spending more time with her, but he did know that the emotions filling the house whenever she was home alone were filled with panic and stress.
It’ll be better after her party, he tried to reassure himself. She’s just worried about making it perfect.
Before he knew it, it was the day of Becca’s birthday party, which made him anxious for her. He’d had so much spare time in Becca’s absence that he’d already organized a costume that he thought she’d get a kick out of as well as arranging the perfect present for her, which he left in the darkroom so that he didn’t risk breaking it.
Standing on Becca’s front step, dressed and ready to go, he felt a little ridiculous. Especially with the large white wings that protruded from his back. They weren’t exactly the most comfortable things in the world. The elastic that held them in place dug into his armpits and the feathers at the tip of each wing were at just the right height to flitter in and out of his peripheral vision, causing him to pivot his head from side to side whenever he forgot that he had them on. Although he wanted nothing more than to adjust the elastic, the suit jacket which he’d received with the costume was too awkward to maneuver in, and he couldn’t quite get his arms to bend in the right way to reach the straps. He couldn't exactly go up to a stranger on the street and ask them either. Not that there had been any strangers, or even a street. He'd gotten dressed in Becca's darkroom and then had popped up to knock on her front door after making sure her front yard was empty.
When the door swung open, he was greeted by a joyful Becca. She wore a blue workman’s shirt with the sleeves torn off and had her curls tucked up underneath a red and white polka-dotted scarf. He grinned back at her; she was the personification of the poster child for feminism. With the front of her shirt buttoned as low as it was, it was almost impossible for Evan to turn away from her very feminine assets.
The thrum of stress which had weighed heavy over the house, and therefore in his heart, in the last few weeks was gone, replaced by an exuberance that he was more than happy to absorb. Even without the benefit of feeling her emotions, he would have been thrilled just to bask in the glow of her megawatt smile. For a moment, he let himself run away with the fanciful notion that her grin was for him—because of him. It was a ridiculous notion considering how many of her friends were already inside, but it made him feel good for a moment.
“You dressed up!” Becca looked like she was about to pounce on him and pull him into a hug, so he tried to make himself look as huggable as possible.
“I did.” He glanced down at his costume, suddenly feeling awkward and hoping that she appreciated it. “I got something for you too, but I, uh, I left it in your darkroom. I hope you don’t mind.”
“I don’t mind,” she said as she pressed a quick peck on the cheek as she leaned into him. “So what exactly are you, an angel?”
Her question reminded him of their first conversation. He smiled. “No, I told you, they’re all insufferable dicks.”
He pulled the final prop for his costume from a hook on one of his belt loops. Holding the bow in one hand, he fought against the costume to reach for an arrow from the small quiver he had on his back.
The instant she realized what he’d dressed as, Becca laughed. Evan had missed the sound so much and he wanted to capture it forever. He wanted her to always be laughing and smiling, and he wanted to be the one who made her.
“A cupid? And here I thought you were going to dress up for me?” she teased.
“I thought it would make you smile,” he admitted.
“You thought right. Although, I have it on very good authority that there isn’t actually a bow and arrow, it’s all in the touch.” She pressed her fingers against his arm.
He swallowed heavily, trying not to let her see how much her gentle touch affected him. “You might be right there, but no one would know what I was otherwise. It’s always the way with stereotypes, right?”
“Thank you,” she said, suddenly earnest. “Not just for dressing up, but for being there for me. I know I’ve been crazy the last week or so, and I wouldn’t have been surprised if you’d left, and, well, I’m glad you didn’t.” Her cheeks flushed red and her voice dropped until it was almost a whisper. “I’m really glad you’re here tonight.”
She was rambling, but Evan didn’t want to call her on it. Instead, he followed her inside and let her return to mingling with her guests. He enjoyed watching her move from friend to friend, a smile practically plastered on her face.
“Hey, stranger.” Cathy sidled up beside him. She was wearing a round yellow and black bee costume, complete with yellow stockings and a pair of antennae on her head. Her rounded face and short stature complimented the outfit choice perfectly. “It’s been a while.”
Ignoring the surreal feeling of being dressed as a mockery of a cupid, talking to a giant bumblebee, Evan agreed with her. After all, it’d been almost a month since the BBQ where Becca had fallen for Drew. It was weird that Evan had barely noticed so much time had passed. As soon as he stopped to consider it though, he couldn’t understand the limbo state he’d been in ever since.
Why hasn’t something happened? Why haven’t I been forced to move on or . . . up? He didn’t even let himself think down, he’d worked hard enough to earn his penance surely?
With Becca happy for the most part, he would have expected that he would have received either a new name or a new home by now. As he glanced across the room to where Becca stood surrounded by three of her friends, including the older Doctor Petersen, he was glad that nothing had happened. He was happy for every extra day he’d been allowed to spend near her.
“So you’ve still got it as bad as ever I see?”
“What?” Evan practically leapt from his skin at Cathy’s suggestion. Surely it wasn’t so obvious that he felt things for Becca. Eventually he was able to remind himself that this was the same woman who’d been convinced Becca felt something for him too. “No, we’re really just friends.”
“Oh yeah, that’s right,” Cathy said, sounding absolutely not convinced in any way, shape, or form. “What are you supposed to be anyway?”
He held up the bow and the arrow which was tipped with a foam love-heart. “Isn’t it obvious?”
“Well, I’d have guessed cupid but you’re a little too big and there’s that whole not-wearing a diaper thing.”
“Cupids don’t have to wear diapers.”
“That’s the image though, isn’t it?”
“It’s a ridiculous image. Why does a cupid have to be a cherub?”
“Well, because he is, isn’t he? That’s like asking why the Easter Bunny is a bunny.”
“All I’m saying is maybe all those images are wrong.”
“It’s make-believe. Does it really matter?”
Cathy’s words cut off further arguments from Evan before he could make them. He was ready to passionately defend the right of cupids the world over not to be ridiculed for being little more than archer babies in diapers. Of course, for pretty much everyone at the party Cupid was nothing more than a make-believe character, like the Easter Bunny, Santa, or the Tooth Fairy. Besides himself, the only one in the room who knew the truth was Becca.
He spoke to Cathy for a little longer before her husband, Gary, brought her a drink from the kitchen.
Gary was dressed as a giant robin, and it didn’t take long for their clever couple’s costume to click in Evan’s head. From what Evan knew about Cathy, albeit largely gleaned from conversations he’d overheard betwe
en her and Becca while he’d been following Becca around at work, the paired costume definitely seemed right up Cathy’s alley. He chuckled as the couple walked away to mix with some of the other guests.
Evan circled the party as much as he had to in order to be polite, but the whole time he kept his gaze on Becca. As if she felt his stare, she kept casting him furtive glances from across the room as well. Each time he met her gaze, she’d offer him a small smile. He wanted to go to her and spend the evening by her side, but he knew that wasn’t his place. And he didn’t want to cement the thought that he was madly in love with Becca in Cathy’s head. Sure it was true, but how pathetic did it make him look when Cathy didn’t understand the reasons why Evan hadn’t acted on his impulses sooner.
It was a mistake to let her meet Drew, he thought. Not one I’ll make again if I get the chance.
He was so beyond caring what his supervisors, or whatever they wanted to call themselves, thought about his actions, especially since he’d been stuck in the same holding pattern for so long. He was in love with Becca and if the chance arose, he would act on it. In fact, if he was given the opportunity, he would do every damn thing in his power to make sure he never lost her again. Unless of course she rejected him.
The thought was like a punch to the stomach.
Almost the instant that thought crossed his mind, he wondered where the perfect Doctor Drew was. The one Becca would never reject.
He certainly wasn’t at the party yet. Evan considered whether there was trouble in paradise, but it didn’t make sense that Becca wouldn’t have mentioned it to him if there was. Even if he didn’t particularly want to, Evan could probably have helped them get over a rough patch if they were having one. He would have, if Becca had asked. Not for Drew’s benefit, but Evan would do anything for Becca.
It was almost half an hour later when the doorbell rang again and Becca raced to open it. When she pulled it open and met Drew’s eyes, a crushing guilt and sorrow, which Evan didn’t understand in the least, overtook her. He tried not to read anything into the fact that rather than the wide smile and feelings of intense happiness she’d felt when she opened the door for Evan, Drew inspired a tight frown and terrible, chest-tightening emotions.
Happily Evan After (Fall For You Book 1) Page 17