by Megan Derr
Someone knocked loudly on his front door and Bralin dropped his scrub brush immediately, grateful for the break. Even if it was probably his bastard landlord come to yell at him some more for the fire's damages. He should really just return to living in the curse breaker barracks; it was more crowded, but probably less of a hassle at this point.
Bralin made his way to the door, wiping his hands dry on the front of his trousers. Unlocking the door, he pulled it open, surprised to find Cos on the other side. He hadn't seen much of Cos since the curses had been broken. Roark was, unsurprisingly, keeping Cos close.
"Hey," Bralin greeted a little cautiously, because he wasn't really sure where he stood with Cos at this point. They'd been friendly, but not real friends, and then Bralin had let it slip that Roark was having him keep an eye on Cos to keep him out of trouble in Roark's absence. Then he'd had to compound it by admitting that he agreed that Cos needed looking after.
"Hey," Cos said quietly, fidgeting a little. He glanced over his shoulder quickly before turning back to Bralin.
"Where's Roark?" Bralin asked, stepping back and gesturing for Cos to come inside. Cos hesitated, but followed him in, glancing around curiously.
"He's trying to pin down Liok," Cos said, a brief smile flickering across his lips before it disappeared.
"Good luck to him with that," Bralin muttered, mustering a smile. The one time he'd talked to Roark in the last few weeks, he'd been concerned about Cos's newfound family and their intentions for him. "What can I do for you, Cos?"
"Apologize," Cos said immediately, straightening a little and meeting Bralin's eyes with a stubborn look. "You were an utter bastard, and for no reason, especially after everything else he went through."
"Apologize?" Bralin repeated, his brain taking a few minutes to parse the rest of Cos's words. "To Asa, you mean?"
"Yes, to Asa," Cos said, giving him a brief, uncertain look before the stubborn expression made a comeback. "He's—he thinks a lot of you, Bralin. More than you deserve—"
"Hey," Bralin objected, a little stung.
"—especially after the miserable things you said to him—"
"He told you what I said?" Bralin asked coolly. He didn't think any better of Asa for telling tales.
"He didn't have to," Cos snapped, raising his voice, and Bralin shut his mouth, surprised at the outburst. Cos had gotten annoyed at him when they'd argued over Bralin watching over him—but he hadn't yelled. It was a little disconcerting to be on the receiving end of Cos's anger, as usually he was so self-contained. "We could hear you through the wall!"
"He cast a curse—"
"He did not," Cos said vehemently. "He cast a healing spell, and only when he had no other recourse. His sister was dying, Bralin. He missed the last day of class because he nearly died, and he lost his job for that. And he never would have cast the spell if I hadn't pressured him into it. And you're not worth it, not after everything you said to him, but he thinks so much of you, so you will apologize, and you will mean it."
"It's not that simple," Bralin said half-heartedly, completely thrown by the scolding. Asa thought that much of him?
"It wasn't a curse," Cos said flatly. "He didn't take advantage of me, I pushed him into it, and he only agreed because Sariah wasn't going to live another day. He's hurting Bralin, and you can fix it."
"Why should I?" Bralin asked, and now he was being bratty and he knew it.
"Because you were wrong," Cos said angrily, color rising in his cheeks as he glared at Bralin. "Because, unless you were completely faking it, you care about him too. Talk to him, or I'll sic Roark on you."
"That's just playing dirty," Bralin muttered, earning himself another glare. "Fine, fine! I'll talk to him. But whether or not I apologize is between me and him."
Cos hesitated, but finally nodded, deflating a little. "Good."
"Was that all you had to yell at me for?" Bralin asked lightly, smiling a little because it was still strange, being yelled at by Cos.
"Um, yes," Cos said, biting his lip. He didn't apologize for yelling, but Bralin didn't really expect him to. "I should get back, before Roark gets home and realizes I'm not there."
Bralin nodded, heading back towards the door. Cos followed, and Bralin really needed to stop underestimating him just because he acted so shy and reserved most of the time. Cos mumbled a quiet goodbye, but pinned him with a dark look that spoke of the consequences Bralin would face if he failed to talk to Asa. Bralin watched him head down the street, wondering if he could actually apologize to Asa.
He could just go and talk to Asa, and see where the conversation went. That would probably work best; better to go in with no plans than to have a half-hearted apology on the tip of his tongue, ready to mangle any chance at reconciliation before Bralin could figure out if that was even what he wanted.
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Part Six
Bralin paused at the top of the stairs to catch his breath, annoyed all over again that Asa and his sister had to live so high into the building. He stopped for strictly longer than was necessary, delaying yet again the looming conversation.
Then, berating himself for being a coward about it—it was just a conversation—Bralin walked up to the door and knocked. It took a moment, but then the door was opened by Asa's sister.
She looked much better than she had after the curses had first broken. Her hair was braided neatly and she wore a pretty dress that fit just right—unsurprising, really, because if Bralin remembered correctly, she was a seamstress.
"What do you want?" Sariah asked him flatly, not looking at all pleased to see him. She had Asa's eyes, and the same nose, but her hair was much lighter and the rest of her face was much more feminine.
"I came to speak with Asa," Bralin said neutrally, wondering why it hadn't occurred to him that he might run into Sariah. She was obviously just as pleased with him as Cos had been.
"Too bad," Sariah said tartly, crossing her arms under her chest. "I don't particularly want to see him hurt a second time, especially when you thought it was a good idea to yell at him after everything he went through to take care of me."
"That's why I want to talk to him," Bralin said, frowning a little. He did really wanted talk to Asa; he wasn't stupid enough to believe he'd been acting completely rationally when he'd confronted Asa after the spells had been broken.
Sariah gave him a scathing look, but before she could say anything more, Asa wandered out of his bedroom. Sariah half-turned, her face softening though her expression was still severe.
"You should be resting," Sariah said sharply, obviously exasperated. She shot a glare at Bralin, but Bralin ignored her, too intent on Asa.
"Couldn't sleep," Asa said quietly, shrugging half-heartedly. He finally looked at Bralin, and his eyes widened briefly before all expression faded from his face again. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to talk to you," Bralin said, trying to keep all inflection from his voice. He really, really didn't want Asa to disappear back into his bedroom now that he'd seen him.
"No," Sariah denied, scowling fiercely. "You're leaving now."
"Sariah," Asa said, summoning brief smile for her. "It's fine." So saying, he walked towards the front door, his bare feet silent on the floor. Sariah didn't move at first, refusing to yield and let Asa through.
"You should check on Eli," Asa said, facing her stubborn expression without backing down. One corner of his lips quirked up in a half-smile as Sariah shot Bralin a dark look, muttering something under her breath as she finally moved. She squeezed Asa's shoulder as she passed him, shooting Bralin a last, dark look that promised retribution if he hurt Asa in any way.
"We can talk outside," Asa suggested, the brief levity fading from his face. Bralin nodded, hoping Asa meant just outside the apartment—he wasn't ready to go down all those stairs again.
Asa shut the apartment door behind him, running his hand through his sleep-tangled curls and glancing at the door like he'
d much rather be inside than out here talking to Bralin. He didn't look anywhere near as recovered as Sariah did, Bralin noted. He looked exhausted and worn, sleep-rumpled though he was.
"You wanted to talk," Asa said, folding his arms much like Sariah had done. He still wasn't looking at Bralin, not really, but at a point next to Bralin's head.
Bralin fidgeted for a moment, and it really had been a stupid idea to trust that he'd figure out what to say to Asa when they finally met. He had no idea—and it didn't look like Asa had any ideas either.
"I just—" Bralin started, shrugging uncomfortably as Asa stared at him flatly. "I don't understand. I mean—you're smart, Asa. You're responsible, or you never would've reported Mestal's spy in the first place. I don't understand how you got to the point where you were willing to risk Cos's life."
Asa flinched a bit, dropping his gaze. His curls dropped down to shadow his eyes; leaving the slight downturn of his mouth as the only visible part of his face.
"I want to understand," Bralin emphasized. He hesitated, but finally resisted the urge to reach out and tip Asa's head back up, even if he really did want to see Asa's expression.
"I was just selfish," Asa said, his words dismissive. He sounded tired though, and he still didn't look up, his fingers clenching his shirt sleeves tightly. "That's all it was. Cos offered and I saw my chance, right? It didn't matter if he died, so long as Sariah was all right."
Bralin scoffed—Asa hadn't even tried to make it sound believable. "Really, if you'd rather I left, then tell me that and I'll go. I don't want lies."
"What do you want, then?" Asa asked, finally looking up. His eyes blazed angrily and he scowled at Bralin. "You didn't want to listen before, but now you do? Why should I believe that? You only came now because Cos made you—" Bralin opened his mouth to deny that, but Asa just kept going. "—and don't try to deny it, he told me he was going to."
"I came because I wanted to," Bralin snapped, unable to help getting angry. "Yes, Cos came and saw me, but I wouldn't have come just because he ordered me to."
"Right," Asa said, the anger leaving him suddenly. He looked even wearier than he had before, and Bralin was tempted to order him back to bed and pick up on this later—but putting it off wouldn't do any good.
"So what, you wanted to come because you don't understand why I did it?" Asa asked after a moment, crossing his arms and regarding Bralin with another of those unnerving, flat stares.
"Partly," Bralin said slowly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. He paused, choosing his words carefully. "I didn't give you a fair chance to explain before I jumped to conclusions. I wasn't thinking, and it wasn't fair."
Asa didn't say anything for a long moment, looking pensive. He turned away from Bralin, crossing the stairway landing to lean against the rickety-looking railing that cordoned off the stairwell. It wobbled a little under Asa's weight, but he paid it no mind even as Bralin eyed it nervously.
"You don't have any siblings," Asa said quietly, making a statement of it.
"No," Bralin confirmed, frowning a little. He didn't have any close family, really—he and Roark were close, but he wouldn't say they were as close as siblings.
"Sariah is my only sibling. She and Eli are my only family," Asa said quietly. He didn't lift his head to look at Bralin, just continued to study the floor in front of him. "My parents died when I was six; I don't really remember much of them. Sariah was barely seventeen then, but she did everything she could for me. She raised me, made sure I got the chance to learn how to use my magic—it was because of her that I had enough certification to become an Assistant Professor after the King's magic edict. She's done everything she could for me—I couldn't just let her die."
Asa looked up then, smiling sadly at Bralin. He ran a hand through his messy curls, and Bralin couldn't figure out what to say.
"None of which is an excuse," Asa said, his smile slipping into a pensive frown. "I don't have one, really. I was desperate, that was it. The curse Sariah was under was supposed to mimic a natural disease, and it did. There was a treatment, but we couldn't afford it. There was nothing in the library save the Sleeping Beauty spell and a handful of worse spells that would help."
"That's what you were researching, then," Bralin said, remembering the thick, dusty tomes Asa had been searching through when they'd spoken in the library. If he'd asked—but really, what could he have done? The curse had been well-hidden, and he didn't have the energy for casing high-powered spells.
Asa nodded, making the railing creak in protest at the moment. Asa paid it no mind, but Bralin wondered how long the railing would hold—Asa was skinny and short (well, shorter than Bralin, at least) but the railing was obviously not the sturdiest of constructions.
"Why didn't you ask me for help?" Bralin asked before he could stop himself. Asa straightened—making the railing creak again—looking completely startled at that question. "Why ask Cos?"
"I didn't ask him," Asa said immediately. "I never—he offered, many times, but I…I never asked. I only agreed when I had no other choice, when Sariah…" Asa paused, then finished quietly. "After she almost died and I had nothing left."
Bralin frowned—that still didn't answer why Asa had never asked him—why he hadn't even told Bralin that his sister was ill until the day they'd met at the University.
"I didn't ask anyone," Asa said quietly. "I didn't—there's never been anyone to ask, before."
"Oh," Bralin said, wincing a little. "You definitely have Cos in your corner. And me, if for any reason you'd want me after the way I behaved."
Asa's eyes widened slightly, but he didn't say anything, just stared at Bralin uncertainly.
"I'm sorry for the way I acted. I jumped to conclusions and was a complete jerk about it," Bralin said slowly, hoping he wasn't screwing this up too. He wasn't really good at apologies. He never really needed them with Roark and he'd never cared enough to try them with anyone else.
"No," Asa said tired, shifting his weight. The banister was ominously quiet. "You were right. There was no excuse for risking Cos's life, not even if he volunteered. I should've refused him again."
"Cos is more persistent and stubborn than I gave him credit for," Bralin said dryly. "I have no doubt he pushed it until you agreed."
"It didn't take much," Asa muttered, running a hand through his hair and still looking more miserable than he should, considering how well everything had turned out.
"From my perspective," Bralin said slowly, frowning a little, "It seems to me that you didn't have a lot of choices. It was either definitely let your sister die, or let Cos take the risk he was pushing to take. I don't think there was a good choice there, and you did the best you could under the circumstances."
Asa shrugged, making the railing wobble again. Bralin wondered briefly when he'd gotten to the point where he was defending Asa's actions rather than thinking the worse of him for it.
"Can you stop leaning on that rail?" Bralin asked, when the silence stretched on. "It sounds like it's going to give way at any minute."
Asa laughed briefly, but obligingly straightened up and stepped away from the banister.
"Thank you, by the by," Asa said, pushing a few stray curls out of his face and regarding Bralin solemnly. "If you hadn't seen the curse and known who could get rid of it…" Asa trailed off, and Bralin winced, filling in the rest of the sentence; if he hadn't caught it, Sariah, Cos, and Asa would all be dead.
It's my job?" Bralin offered awkwardly, pretty sure he didn't deserve any praise. "I'm just glad I could help and that everything turned out well after Liok broke the curse."
Asa smiled halfheartedly at that, and Bralin frowned. Had everything turned out well? He'd assumed, since Cos was perfectly fine and both Sariah and Asa seemed okay, if a little tired…but he'd made some bad assumptions in the past, too.
"You and Sariah are okay, right?" Bralin asked, not willing to let it slide this time. "You're not suffering any side effects from the breaking?"
"No, we're fine," Asa said, looking confused for a moment before his expression cleared.
"You don't look fine," Bralin said, even as part of his mind warned him that he should be speaking ill of Asa's appearance if he wanted anything romantic to do with Asa in the future.
…which, he did, even if Asa was probably two steps from outright hatred of him.
"I'm fine," Asa said, forcing a half-smile to his lips. "Just tired, and that will get better with time."
"It's been two weeks," Bralin said skeptically, frowning worriedly at Asa. He activated his mage sight, peering intently at Asa—but there didn't seem to be any lingering curse fragments clinging to him. "You should be recovered by now. Cos is."
"Cos only had to power the spell," Asa said, shrugging and looking uncomfortable. "I had to hold it together."
"Still," Bralin said, studying Asa critically. What was he missing? Asa frowned at him, obviously displeased that Bralin was pushing the issue. "That wasn't all," Bralin recalled suddenly. "You also took the brunt of the curse breaking."
"I'll be fine in a few days," Asa said stiffly, and Bralin reluctantly let it drop. It would probably take Asa few more weeks to fully recover, but point that out would just piss Asa off more.
"Have you decided what you're going to do now?" Bralin asked, changing the subject. If Liok's deception worked, Asa and Sariah would be left alone—magically—but Eli would still be unprotected.
"No," Asa said, sighing quietly. He turned towards the apartment, frowning at the door for a moment. "It would be safer if we could leave town, but there's nowhere we can really go. We don't have the money to start over somewhere new."
Bralin hesitated—but he might be able to help with that. Even if it meant Asa leaving.
"I could help," Bralin offered, ignoring the twinge of hurt when Asa shot him a surprised look. "I'd have to write a letter, but if you don't mind moving, I think I know someone who wouldn't mind taking you in until you could get a proper start."
"I—" Asa began, frowning uncertainly at Bralin. He didn't get any further than that though, just stood there staring at Bralin.