Merrilee pushed back and stood, as well. “I’ll walk with you, if you don’t mind. I could use the exercise and that way Bull and Lars can attend to the dishes.”
For a second Lars almost felt sorry for his mom. For a fleeting instant she looked lost and hurt, but then it passed. “It’s not necessary, but if you want the exercise, by all means.”
Lars stood. “Mom, I apologize for being rude.”
“That’s all you have to say?”
He ran his hand over his head. Lars knew what she wanted him to say, but he couldn’t apologize for telling the truth. “I love you. Get a good night’s rest and I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Only if it’s not too much trouble for you to see me before I leave.” When he was a kid her sarcasm had always cut deep. “Perhaps you can drop off a script so I know the right thing to say.”
Okay, so he didn’t feel quite so bad anymore.
“I’ll be back in a bit,” Merrilee said.
“We’ve got the dishes covered,” Bull said, beginning to stack the plates.
Merrilee pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. “Thanks, love.”
“Night, Janie-Girl,” Bull said to his sister.
“Good night.”
For a long minute, only the clink of dishes and silverware filled the silence in the room after the door closed behind the women. Bull, never a big talker, was apparently waiting to hear what Lars had to say. Bull ran dishwater in the sink.
“Was I too harsh with her?” Lars finally said. He’d never spoken to his mother that way. He gathered the glasses.
Bull shrugged as he carried the plates over to the counter. “You might have been a little hard, but you didn’t say anything that wasn’t true.”
For the first time in his life, Lars paused and thought of his mother as a whole person and not just his mother. “Was she like this when she was a girl?”
“Janie’s always had to be the center of attention, just like she’s always at odds with someone.” Lars couldn’t recall a time when his mom wasn’t fighting with someone in the family or in her professional circle. “She doesn’t want to know what’s going on in your life as much as she wants to tell you what you should do.” Bull began to run water in the sink as Lars brought over the pasta bowls. “It’s gotten worse as she’s gotten older. Maybe she needed to hear that tonight. It doesn’t really matter—it’s said. I doubt it’ll do any good, but it won’t do any harm either. What’s harmful is keeping all that bottled up inside you.”
Lars hadn’t realized his misery had been all bottled up inside until his earlier conversation with Delphi. It was as if she’d recognized something he was too close to see in himself. “Well, I guess it’s not now.”
Bull plunged his hands into the soapy water. Lars positioned himself to rinse and dry. That was one thing his mom had in common with her brothers. None of them believed in dishwashers. Bull called it “quality time.”
“If it makes you feel better, say it. But don’t expect your mom to change. It’s pretty unlikely at this stage of the game.”
Lars hadn’t thought it through. He’d simply had enough and blown his cool. “You’re right. It just felt like it was time to call her out. She may not change, but I don’t have to play her game anymore. Mom is incredibly manipulative.”
Bull nodded. “Yep.” He scrubbed at a pot. “Of course, not all women are like your mom.”
Had the comment come from anyone other than Bull, Lars would’ve offered a sarcastic rejoinder. As it was, he simply said, “I know.”
“Good. I’m going out on a limb here. If you feel rejected by Janie...well, it’s not you—it’s her.”
Lars’s knee-jerk reaction was to deny he felt rejected by his mother. Only he realized he couldn’t, as he finally pegged the nameless feeling he’d always had. He’d considered her difficult and alternately demanding and remote, but it took Bull’s labeling it as rejection for it to hit home.
All these years... It was as if he’d finally found the buried trip wire he’d been searching for with dread all this time.
“You know, you’re right.” He felt damn good. “Can I take you up on that offer to use your truck while I’m here? I’ve got a date tonight.”
“Delphi? Mirror Lake?”
“Yeah and yeah.” Lars was a little disconcerted. “How’d you know it was Delphi and Mirror Lake?” He rinsed the pots and pans and placed them in the dish drainer.
Bull grinned. “I remember how much you liked it when you were here before. And Delphi—well, that was easy enough to figure out. You two seemed to be having a good time at the reception.”
“She’s different.”
“Different is good.”
“Yeah, I think so, too.”
“Merrilee is one of a kind.” Funny, Delphi struck him that way, as well. “When you find a good one, you hold on to her.”
As he’d told his brother, he planned to do just that. At least until it was time to rotate out.
8
THE SUN WAS still making itself known when Delphi stepped out onto the sidewalk in front of the bed-and-breakfast. She wouldn’t like the long hours of dark and cold in the winter, but she liked these extended daylight hours now. The sun warmed her face and neck.
A jovial mix of music, conversation and laughter floated on the air from the bar and restaurant next door, along with the smell of burgers and fries. From further down the street, children’s squeals of delight mingled with dogs barking. Skye had pointed out an empty lot that served as the local “sandlot” baseball field. A couple strolled arm in arm down the sidewalk across the street.
Out of nowhere the thought floated through her mind that she could like it here, really like it. Funny. She’d simply wanted to get away from her situation and regroup. Actually liking Good Riddance hadn’t been part of her plan.
The bed-and-breakfast door opened behind her and her heart began to thud. She turned to greet Lars...except it wasn’t Lars.
“Your honey’ll be along soon enough,” Alberta said with a cackle. “Don’t mind us. My studmuffin napped through the party today so Jefferson’s gonna play dis horn so we can dance.”
“That sounds like fun.” And it did.
Alberta still wore her pink evening gown complete with feathered turban while her studmuffin wore the same pair of denim overalls with flannel shirt he’d had on yesterday. Nonetheless, he beamed at Alberta. “She’s a regular doll, isn’t she?”
“Yessir, she is,” Delphi said.
The gypsy queen put her head against his shoulder and smiled up at him, her eyelashes fluttering like a young girl awaiting her first kiss. The look that passed between them was similar to the one between Tansy and Liam earlier. Skye and Dalton also had the same way of looking at each other, heedless of onlookers.
Jefferson nodded his saxophone toward Delphi by way of greeting. “Alberta wants to dance to ‘Moonlight Serenade.’”
She cackled once again. “That’s right. Gotta dance to it now, since me and my boys can never make it up till midnight any longer.” A three-legged cat hopped along with them. “Lord Byron loves music.”
Jefferson took up a spot on the corner of the sidewalk and began to play, the saxophone’s notes weaving through the night air, sultry and buttery rather than piercing. Alberta and her husband danced in Good Riddance’s dusty street. Further down, the couple who ran the dry goods store drifted out and began to dance, as well. The man and woman who’d been walking on the opposite sidewalk took advantage of the music, too, as Jefferson segued into another song.
There was a romantic, surreal element to it all. The dusty street in the middle of the Alaskan bush, the notes of the saxophone weaving a spell, the dancing couples, some in evening wear, some in work gear, snow-topped mountains and evergreens serving as a backdrop.
A truck pulled to a stop in front of her, startling her until she realized Lars sat behind the wheel. He got out and rounded the front. Sunlight glinted in his short, military-cut hair. He’d
exchanged his dress uniform for blue jeans and a Super Bowl T-shirt from a couple of years ago. It was rather disconcerting how simply seeing him set her heart rate galloping. Was it those broad shoulders or that wicked glint in his eyes when he smiled? Or perhaps it was just that general sense of attraction she’d felt for him from the very beginning. Either way, her pulse had moved into hyper mode.
“Hey, you,” he said, and for some goofy reason, it struck her as incredibly romantic.
“Hey.” She felt lost in his gaze, but lost in a good way.
“Street dance?” he said, nodding toward Jefferson and the couples.
“It’s turned into that.” Good Lord, but she wanted to kiss him again.
He motioned with his right hand. “Would you rather stay? We could check out Mirror Lake another time.”
“No. This is great but I’m looking forward to seeing Mirror Lake.”
He smiled and her tummy seemed to somersault. “Me, too. Ready to roll?”
“Yeah, let’s go.”
He opened the passenger door for her.
She stepped off of the sidewalk and climbed in. “I don’t know what I was thinking,” she said when he got back in the cab, “but I wasn’t expecting you to be driving.”
He flashed a grin her way. “It’s a bit far out of town to walk, so I borrowed Bull’s truck. He offered to let me use it while I was visiting.”
“Nice.” The sun slanted through the windshield, illuminating the fine lines bracketing his eyes. A small scar ran along his jawline. A light dusting of hair ran along his forearms. His biceps bulged impressively. However, it was the man himself, his air, the whole package, that sent a prickle of gooseflesh dancing over her skin. Excitement...anticipation hovered between them.
A delicious tension pulsed in the cab. Slow down, she reminded herself. She threw out a safe topic. “How was dinner?”
Trained to notice details, as details often meant the difference between life and death, Delphi saw his smile take on a tense edge. “I don’t know.”
His response surprised her. So much for dinner being safe. “Didn’t you eat with your family?” At least that’s what he’d said he was doing.
“Sure did.”
He wasn’t making sense. “So, how can you not know how it went? Have you been drinking?” She had to ask. She didn’t ride with anyone who’d been drinking. She’d seen too many drunk driving victims come in on ambulance stretchers.
They left the town behind, evergreens flanking the road before them. His driving seemed fine but she could easily walk back if she needed to. They both could if he’d overindulged. For that matter, she was fully capable of driving.
He shot her a sidelong look, a frown furrowing his brow. “Of course not. I have more discipline than that.”
“No need to get all huffy. I just don’t get how you wouldn’t know if something was good or bad.”
He rubbed his hand over his head. “What the heck? You already know more about my family than you probably wanted to.” She waited. “You know how we talked about my mom earlier?”
“Yes.”
“Tonight at dinner was more of the same—it was all about her. Not once has she asked about me. And she won’t. She’ll offer an opinion on what I should do and how I should do it but it’s all based on bullshit. Because she doesn’t know a damn thing about me. Sorry, it just pisses me off.”
She understood his vehemence. It really sucked to be manipulated. “No apology necessary. What happened?” If he told her it was none of her business, well, then it was none of her business.
“Tonight at dinner, I called her out on her behavior. I’m tired of letting her get away with this crap.”
“And...?”
“It kind of felt good, but it was also awkward as hell. She got up and left.”
That didn’t surprise Delphi at all. Anyone who would “faint” to garner attention would certainly go for a dramatic exit. However, she merely said, “I’m sure it was a little awkward.”
“So, there you have it. The food was good and then it got weird. So I don’t really know how the evening was.”
“You okay? We don’t have to go.” She didn’t want him to feel as if she was an obligation. “You’re here all week. We can go some other time.”
“No. I want to go now. It’s no big deal. I just couldn’t tell you if it was good or bad.”
That made sense. “Okay.”
“You’re easy to talk to,” he said.
She laughed. “Make up your mind. You told me earlier it was difficult to have a conversation with me.”
He grinned at her and her heart rate instantly doubled. That smile was like a shot of epinephrine. “There’s a difference in talking to someone and actually having a conversation.”
“Ah, okay. I see. Well, you certainly can talk.”
He laughed. “I’m not sure that was a compliment.”
“It wasn’t an insult. It was more of an observation.” And she’d been teasing him a little.
“If you say so.”
“So, now that the wedding’s over, what are you up to the rest of the week?”
He turned left off of the main road.
“Monday I’m flying out to Liam’s camp to check it out. I’m going out with Dirk in the morning and Dalton’s going to swing back by and pick me up in the afternoon. Then I’m going to get in some fishing, hiking and reading. What about you? Do you jump right into work?”
“Pretty much. Nelson will still be here next week so I’ll shadow him, meet the patients and get a feel for how Skye works. We’re friends but we’ve never worked together before.” They topped a rise and over to the left lay a spectacular lake. “This is really beautiful!” Delphi nearly squealed like a kid with excitement. “Lars, look. Eagles. Oh, my goodness, they’re incredible.”
Two of the birds perched atop trees while another one soared against the backdrop of a flawless blue sky. “I’ve never seen anything quite so beautiful in my life,” she said.
“I’m inclined to agree.” However, he was looking at her rather than the landscape and it felt like a visual caress.
He stopped the truck, putting it in Park. He killed the engine and they sat, letting the tranquillity of the place wash over them. An eagle called out but rather than shatter the peace, the cry became part of the ambience.
Lars broke the silence. “How did all of this work out? You just quit your job to come here for a couple of months?”
She looked out the window at the trees etched against the sky. Should she trust him? He was nothing to her, really. Except he had let her in on his family’s problems, ones she suspected he didn’t share often, if ever. And he was temporary, which, in a way, made the nightmare she’d been through easier to talk about. She looked at him. “It’s not a secret, but I don’t particularly want it broadcasted.”
“I’m not a broadcasting kind of guy.”
“For all that you like to talk, no, you don’t strike me that way.”
They were silent for a few minutes. He waited patiently. “I’ve been unemployed for six months because I got fired from my last job.”
“Okay.”
One word. Nothing more, nothing less. He was still waiting. She continued, keeping it as simple as possible. “My employer made a pass at me. I turned him down. He blackballed me. Because it was my word against his, I haven’t been able to find a job.”
He sat silently. She wondered not just how, but if, he was going to respond. Finally, he said, “That’s bullshit.”
She felt sick to her stomach. He was just like all the rest. She didn’t know why she’d been stupid enough to think—
He interrupted her mental rant. “He shouldn’t be allowed to get away with something like that. Was he some old fart?”
Relief washed over her. His “bullshit” hadn’t been aimed at questioning her story. “No. He was young, not even close to old-fart designation—thirty-six, married, handsome and charming.”
“So, of course, why woul
d you turn him down? Bastard. What’d he do, beat you to the punch by firing you?”
She was so relieved she almost wanted to cry. With the exception of a few, most of her friends had felt compelled to quiz her as to whether she’d been attracted to him, had she given him some signal, as if they were looking for something she did to encourage or excuse him. It had been insulting and demoralizing, and had just heaped insult on injury. However, Lars had immediately believed her and his hazarded guess was on target.
She ran her fingertip over the ridge of the upholstery. “I went in the next morning prepared to give my two-months’ notice and not ever mention what had happened to anyone. He was two steps ahead of me.” She shook her head at her naïveté, her stupidity. “He called me into his office and his wife was in there with him. He’d told her I’d propositioned him and when he turned me down, I’d threatened to make trouble. He fired me on the spot. His wife took care of blackballing me with all the other doctors’ wives. The few offers I did get, afterwards, included more than a job.”
“Son of a bitch.”
“I agree. I’ve called him and the rest of them that and more. The good old boy network is still alive and well in the Doctors’ Club. They all have one another’s back.” She glanced out the window at the proud bird, fierce and beautiful, on the branch, etched against a sky bearing streaks of pink and orange. “And you know, from their perspective it made perfect sense. Doctors are considered quite a catch by a lot of women, by a lot of nurses, in fact. He’s a handsome, fit man so why wouldn’t they believe I’d make a play for him? What I’ve never figured out is why he’d do something like that. I thought they were a happy couple. I admired that they were a happy couple. And even if he wanted to stray, he could pretty much have any woman he desired. So why me? I don’t get it.”
“I get it,” Lars said softly. “There’s something about you.”
She turned to face him, trying to understand. “There is? What?”
Northern Rebel: Daring in the Dark Page 9