Mercifully, because the traffic on the freeway was flowing, they reached the Bedford medical complex across the street from Blair Memorial in a little under twenty minutes.
The wait inside turned out to be longer. As Angela sat fidgeting beside her, it was almost forty-five minutes before there was a free exam room. Angela had wanted to leave twice and had actually gotten up once, but she allowed herself to be talked into remaining. Lori had a feeling the girl just wanted someone to force her to find out. Wanted someone to care enough to find out.
And now Angela was in exam room one, finding out if her life was going to be forever altered. Lori couldn’t help feeling nervous for her.
Lori stared down at her nails. All Dr. Pollack had to do was give her a pelvic and she’d known immediately that she was pregnant. Why was it taking so long with Angela?
She knew she had absolutely no say in this matter one way or another, but if Angela was pregnant, she was going to try to talk the girl into having the baby and then considering her options after that. Maybe Angela’s mother would finally find some maternal feelings and come through for her.
At the very least, Angela could give the baby up for adoption. Teaching the Lamaze classes had made her realize that there were so many people out there longing for a child of their own. If Angela had her baby and then gave it up for adoption, she’d be giving the gift of life to not only her child, but to the couple who would be adopting him or her.
The door leading back to the waiting room finally opened.
For one beat, Lori held her breath, mentally practicing her speech and crossing her fingers that Angela would be receptive.
There were tears on the girl’s cheeks. She was pregnant. Lori was on her feet instantly. The next second, she was hugging the girl to her as the other three women in the waiting room looked on.
“Honey, it’s okay. I’ll be there for you,” she promised.
But Angela drew away, shaking her head. “No.”
Lori ignored the presence of the other women in the room. “I know you don’t think so now, but—”
Angela was still shaking her head. “No, you don’t understand.” And then she grabbed Lori’s arms urgently. “I’m not pregnant. All this stuff at home, all this tension with my mom and my boyfriend, it’s made me late, that’s all. I’m not pregnant,” she repeated. Her voice vibrated with overwhelming relief.
Lori blew out a breath, vicariously sharing the teenager’s relief. Okay, she thought, no speech necessary. Catastrophe averted. She slipped an arm around the girl’s slim shoulders.
“C’mon, let’s go back to the center.”
Suddenly too emotional to say another word, Angela just nodded. Lori opened the door and guided her out of the office.
She gave Angela some time to really absorb the situation and to calm down. She knew the girl must have been terrified as she waited for the pelvic exam to be over. Dr. Pollack had a wonderfully comforting bedside manner, but that still didn’t take the edge off the fear Angela had gone in with. One look at her face when she’d followed the nurse into the inner office had said it all.
As she turned down the block to the teen center, Lori glanced at Angela. The girl had been incredibly quiet all the way back, not even attempting to change the radio station to find more contemporary music, the way she had on the way there.
Though the news was good, Lori couldn’t help wondering if a part of Angela was somehow just a little disappointed just the same. This was a bittersweet situation that required delicate negotiation.
Lori knew all about emotions being all over the map. Hers had been doing that for a long while now.
“You dodged a bullet that time, Angela. There’s a lesson to be learned here.”
“Yeah, I’ll say.” Lori saw the girl’s profile harden. “I thought Vinnie loved me. He said he’d always love me, no matter what. But once I told him I thought I was pregnant, the S.O.B. said he didn’t want anything to do with me. He said if I was pregnant, it wasn’t his. Like I’d ever slept with anyone else.” Angela looked at her, her voice impassioned. “I’m not like that, Lori.”
She reached for Angela’s hand and gave it a quick squeeze. “I know that, honey. But there’s a bigger lesson here than finding out the kind of guy Vinnie is. Sex isn’t a game, Angela, it’s a responsibility.”
“Is that what you learned?”
She heard the defensiveness in the girl’s voice. She didn’t want Angela to think she was criticizing her or lecturing to her. “I was married.”
Angela flushed. “Sorry, I didn’t mean that.” She bit one of her fingernails. “I kinda mouth-off when I get mad.”
Lori smiled at her. “I noticed.” And then she thought about her own life. “But, in a way, I suppose I’m a pretty good example of all the things that a woman has to think about before she does decide to get pregnant. You have to finish your education before you start a family so that you’re better equipped to provide for your baby in case something happens. All sorts of things happen in life that you’re not ready for. My husband died, my company went bankrupt and I had to scramble to make a living so that when this baby comes, I can provide for it. I’ve got a college degree and I’m a lot older than you are, Angela.”
Angela’s head bobbed up and down vigorously. “I’ll say.”
Lori got out of the car and looked at the girl over the hood of her car. Nothing like a teenager to make you feel old, she thought.
“Hey, not that much older. But what I’m saying here is that you’ve got all the time in the world for this when you get older, Angela. Don’t rush out of your teens. Don’t rush to take on responsibilities that shouldn’t be there for you until you’ve had time to be fifteen and eighteen and twenty. And carefree.”
Angela bit down on her lower lip, as if she was actually mulling over the advise instead of blocking it out. “I guess that makes sense.”
And then she flashed a smile that warmed Lori’s heart. “Of course it makes sense.” Lori opened the rear door to the center for her. “Now don’t you have a game to practice for?”
“Yeah,” Angela beamed, looking very much like a fifteen-year-old who’d had the weight of the world lifted off her shoulders. “I do.” And then she surprised Lori by throwing her arms around her and hugging her. “Thanks,” she mumbled against her shoulder.
The next minute, Angela bolted and rushed into the building.
And that, Lori thought, was the way a fifteen-year-old was supposed to behave. Impulsive and happy.
“What was that all about?”
Startled, the door handle slipped out of her hand. She swung around to see Carson standing almost behind her. Where had he come from?
She took in a breath, then released it. Her stomach felt oddly jumbled, as if it was under attack. When would this baby stop tap dancing? It had been doing it for the past twenty-four hours or so. “Who let you out of your cage?”
He’d been worried. When he hadn’t seen her for the past two hours, he’d assumed that she hadn’t been feeling well and had decided to go home. It wasn’t like her to leave without saying something. Calling her at home had gotten him nowhere. Calling the hospital had done the same.
He hadn’t known what to think. Leaving Rhonda in charge, he’d gone out for a walk to try to channel this sudden directionless energy that was threatening to undo him. He’d just turned a corner when he’d seen Lori’s car pull up. He’d lost no time in hurrying over.
“I wanted to clear my head,” he told her.
She looked up at the sky. It was one of those hazy days that people associated with Southern California. “Too much smog out here for that today.”
He knew what she was trying to do. “I’ve gotten used to it and don’t change the subject. Where the hell have you been and what’s up with Angela?”
She knew she should have told him before she left, but she also knew that he would have tried to talk her out of it, or flat-out told her she couldn’t do this because there were rules to con
sider. All she could consider was Angela’s welfare.
“I took her to see my gynecologist.”
Carson’s chiseled jaw dropped almost an inch. “Lori—”
She held up her hands before he could launch into a lecture. “I know, I know, I was meddling and I’m not supposed to, but damn it, Carson, the girl thought she was pregnant.”
Dark brows gathered like storm clouds. “The girl also has a mother.”
“So? Ma Barker was also a mother. She got her sons killed. And then there was Catherine de’ Medici. She had scores of children. She also loved poisoning anyone she thought was her enemy—”
At times, her penchant for being a walking trivia trove got annoying. “I don’t need a random history lesson, Lori. We’re talking about parental rights here.”
“No,” she contradicted passionately. “We’re talking about a young girl’s life.” She stuck her chin out pugnaciously. “You didn’t talk to Angela’s mother, Carson. I did. Or tried to. She sounded like she could care less about her daughter.” She fisted her hands where her waist would have been under different circumstances, ready to fight him on this. “And if you’re going to talk about rights, what about Angela’s rights? What about her right to peace of mind?”
She could make a statue want to cover its ears. “Don’t play lawyer with me, Lori. You won’t win.” His anger was calm, controlled. And maybe a little intimidating for all its quiet. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t care about the rights of these kids and what they’re entitled to. I also know we wouldn’t be able to survive a lawsuit. It would shut St. Augustine’s down.”
In her opinion, there were far too many lawyers in the world, ready to go to battle and disrupt lives over petty issues. She was secretly glad that Carson had left those ranks.
“What lawsuit?” she demanded heatedly. “I just took her into my doctor so that she could find out if she was pregnant or not. She’s not about to tell her mother I did that. She wants to put the whole thing behind her. Angela and her mother aren’t exactly the Gilmore Girls.”
“All right, so what did you find out? Is she pregnant?”
Her anger melted into a smile. He liked watching the transformation and told himself he shouldn’t. “No, stress is throwing her timing off, that’s all. She also got a little education in the fickleness of young studs.” He raised his eyebrow, waiting for Lori to elaborate. “She told her boyfriend she thought she was pregnant and he split. Said it wasn’t his. His undying love died.” She shook her head. The girl was looking for love in all the wrong places. “Damn near broke her heart.”
That sounded far too sensitive for the girl he was acquainted with. “She said that?”
“She didn’t have to. Her eyes did.”
“You read eyes now?”
She looked up into his. Still as unfathomable as always, she thought. Most of the time, the man was a walking mystery to her. But that didn’t mean she wasn’t willing to try to change that. “I read anything that’ll give me a clue.”
“Lori, you’re going to turn my hair gray.”
She cocked her head, trying to picture him with streaks of gray woven through his black hair. “Gray looks good on some men. Makes them distinguished.”
He laughed shortly, shaking his head. “You’ve got an answer for everything, don’t you?”
“Pretty much.”
“You should have been the lawyer.” The other side would have been waving a white flag in no time, Carson thought.
She grinned. “If I had been, I would have given you a run for your money.”
His eyes slid over her abdomen. “Right now, I don’t want to see you running anywhere. Matter of fact, I’d rather not see you, period.”
“You know you don’t mean that.” She patted his face. “I light up your day.”
The ironic thing was, he thought as opened the door for her and they walked back into the building, she was right. Not that he was ever going to tell her. If she knew, there’d be no living with her.
There was hardly any living with her now.
Despite the fact that the baby insisted on being restless, Lori spent the rest of the day at the center. She’d seen all the kids off, had talked to Angela again before the girl went home and had told Rhonda that she would lock up. There were no Lamaze classes tonight and she didn’t relish the idea of going home just yet.
She wondered if Carson was in the mood to catch a quick bite. Making her way to his office, she found him the way she had last week. Frowning over something on the computer.
Probably the budget again. He hadn’t said a word about her idea since she’d framed it for him. It was time to prod him. “So, have you given my suggestion any thought?”
Carson blinked as he looked away from the screen. No matter how long he stared, the number just wouldn’t change. “What suggestion?”
Was he playing games, or had he really forgotten? “About the fund-raiser.”
“No.” He’d been hoping the impossible, that she would drop the matter.
The word had a final ring to it. She might have known. With Carson, everything was an uphill fight. “Why?”
“Because it was a dumb suggestion when you made it, and it’s still a dumb suggestion now.” He saw exasperation flit over her face and knew he was in for it. Trying to cut her off wasn’t going to work, but he tried anyway. “Fund-raisers are for national causes, national charities. Medical research.”
“Not everyone wants to toss their money into a large pile.” He was an intelligent man, why didn’t he know that? “There are a lot of people who feel better backing the little guy.”
His mouth twisted into a cynical expression. “Well, they certainly don’t come any littler than St. Augustine’s.”
Was he being sarcastic, or just downplaying the center’s influence on the neighborhood teens? She took offense for the center. And for him.
“Oh, I don’t know. It’s had positive effects on people’s lives over the years. Look at how you turned out.”
She struck a nerve. “Right. I don’t think People magazine’s going to be breaking down my door anytime soon, asking for an interview.”
She wasn’t about to let him throw stones, even at himself. Especially not at himself. “You were a kid who came from these mean streets and you became a successful lawyer.”
That was only half the story. His ex had jeered the rest at him when she’d announced that she was going to get a divorce. “Who gave up working at a lucrative law firm to come back here and periodically bash his head against a wall.”
That wasn’t all there was to the story. “Because he was compassionate,” Lori pointed out.
How could he argue with her when she was trying to defend him? He smiled despite himself. “Do you always have to have the last word?”
Her eyes danced as she looked up at him. “Only when I’m right.”
“And just who decides that?”
“Me,” Lori replied simply, knowing she was baiting him. “And God.”
He sighed, shaking his head. Maybe he should call it a night after all. He was bone tired. It had been a long day. Carson pressed buttons on the keyboard, closing the computer down. “So now you talk to God.”
“Every night.”
“And does He talk back, or do you intimidate him, too?”
She honed in on what she took to be a slip. “Do I intimidate you?”
Carson gave her a look that was meant to put her in her place. “No, but you try.”
“Do not,” she countered glibly. “I just like to champion a cause, that’s all.” She frowned, wishing he’d listen to reason. She just knew the fund-raiser would erase that furrow between his eyebrows. At least temporarily. “And I hate seeing you being so stubborn when you’re wrong.”
He wondered what it felt like, to always feel you were right, to always be on the side of the angels. “Maybe I’m not.”
“But maybe you are,” she insisted. “Don’t you think you owe it to yourself—and the ce
nter—to find out?”
Didn’t she understand how presumptuous all this sounded? And how humiliating it could be? “What if we gave a fund-raiser and nobody came?”
Her parents had instilled the ability within her to always see the bright side of any situation. “Then the kids at the center would have a lot of good food to eat for a week.” But that wasn’t going to happen. She firmly believed that. “What if we didn’t give a fund-raiser and people were willing to come?”
The woman just wouldn’t stop, would she? “Lori, you’re talking nonsense.”
She took offense at the cavalier way he dismissed the idea. “I never thought you’d be afraid.”
She knew just how to press his buttons, even when he thought he’d put a lock on them. “I’m not afraid, I just don’t want to look like a fool.”
Didn’t he get it yet? “Caring about something doesn’t make you a fool.”
What did it take to pull the shades from her eyes? And why did a woman who had so much go wrong for her seem determined to continue looking at life through rose-colored glasses?
“But thinking that I can get other people to care about what I care about just on my say-so does. Don’t you understand that? Now drop this, Lori, before you make me lose my temper.”
She frowned at him. Stubborn idiot. “Is that supposed to make me shake in my shoes?”
He could feel his temper beginning to fray. “It’s supposed to make you stop babbling, although I’m beginning to think only duct tape will accomplish that.”
Yelling at him had never been the way to win. She tried again. “Let me talk to my friends,” she pleaded. “You know I’m right.”
Enough was enough. Standing up, he towered over her. “What I know is that if you don’t stop nagging, I’m going to have to fire you.”
Her eyes narrowed. “You wouldn’t dare. You need me.”
He’d gone too far to make a U-turn now. “Try me.”
“You’d really fire me?”
“If you don’t stop, yes.” Why wouldn’t she just back off? Something had to make her.
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