“Say something,” he says his voice laced with despair.
“I’m sorry you had to go through all of that. I hate the saying, but things do happen for a reason. I hate that you went through all of that and pretty much on your own, because it sounds like you didn’t have any friends besides those men, but had none of this happened, maybe you wouldn’t have found my brothers and their friends. They’ve become your family and even though you haven’t been honest with them, which you had reasons for, they would still accept you.”
“What about you?” He looks up at me.
“What about me?”
“Do you still accept me?”
“Jason, when are you going to get it in your thick-ass skull that I am not going anywhere. You won’t be getting rid of me. I know a lot of things we did are wrong. We shouldn’t have hooked up and started seeing each other when you were married or so soon after she died, but honestly, as bad as it’s going to sound, I don’t care. It felt right being with you. People can call me a bitch or a slut for it, I don’t care. Our relationship isn’t common, a lot of people would frown upon it, but who cares what others think. All that matters is that we are happy and that you don’t go around fucking other women. You do and I won’t hesitate to chop your balls off and feed them to rabid dogs.”
He chuckles. “I don’t doubt for a second that you’d do that, that’s if Gabe and Aleck don’t kill me first.”
“I’ll make sure they don’t, but it might be better if they know the full story. If they don’t accept us being together, we can just run away, get married in Vegas and travel the world.” I shrug.
“Interesting back-up plan.” He smiles and wraps me in his arms.
“I always have a back-up plan, besides, I’d go anywhere with you.” I kiss his neck and cuddle into him.
“I’d go anywhere with you too.” He kisses the top of my head.
“How do you feel now, having told me most of it?”
“Most of it?” He scoffs.
“I know you held back on some stuff.”
“I did. But you know all of it, just not the details of what I did, and I’d rather not tell you that.”
“Understandable.”
“I’m feeling a lot better. One less person to lie to and keep up with those lies.” He sighs.
“That must not have been easy to lie to everyone and remember what you told each of them.”
“It’s a fucking nightmare. I have to remember what I said to the Hangman, the cops and report back to Sergei about everything.”
“What do you mean report back to Sergei about everything?” I sit up and look at him.
“Fuck.” He rubs his face, clearly having let that slip.
“I’m waiting.”
“The intel I was getting when working with the Hangman, Bastards and Angels wasn’t coming from one of my cops being on the inside. It was coming from Sergei and his men. He had someone infiltrate the Kings and report back. Same thing just not from the right job.”
“Anything else?”
“I might have been a part of the reason that some of the deals went wrong in the past for the Hangman and the Bastards.” He grins innocently.
“You’re so fucked.” I can’t help but chuckle.
“I know.” He looks at me looking exhausted and amused.
“The sooner you tell them, the better it’ll be.”
“I don’t know how to tell them. Ric and Ray already hate my guts, th-”
“They don’t hate you. MCs don’t like cops because usually they are after them and do everything they can to put them behind bars or six feet under. You are the opposite. You are helping them get away with crimes they’re committing and even helping out on some. They’ll be pissed that’s for sure. Some might want to fight you for you to prove that you are worthy of them, but they won’t kill you. It’s not like you’re really working for the cops anyway. The Hangman and the Russians have a truce. They each keep to their territory and everything will be fine. You working for the Russians might not go down too well, but you haven’t done anything since you’ve hung out with them that would make any deal fall or anything else, not that I know of anyway.”
“I guess you’re right. I am however responsible for the Disciples coming here.”
“What do you mean?” I look at him, confused and he pulls out a slip of paper from his wallet.
“I got this yesterday. Lewis found it in my office when I dropped it and she looked into my file, that’s how she found out I’m not a cop.”
“What did you do that would cause this type of backlash? Looks like I’m targeted too.” I sigh.
“Probably tortured one of them or someone they knew, or because I helped you, or all of the above, I’m not sure. All I know is that I need you to stay safe. I don’t want anything to happen to you.”
“I’ll be fine. I told you, I’m protected.”
“By who?”
“I can’t tell you.” I bite my lip. I know I’m not being fair, but I can’t possibly tell him.
“Really? After I told you everything, you can’t confess one tiny little thing?”
“They told me that if anyone knew they would kill the ones I love. I’m not willing to risk your life or my brothers’ lives and their friends. I’m sorry.”
“I wish you could tell me, for fuck’s sake.” He wraps me in his arms. I rest my head on his chest. I hate having to keep things from him, but I have no choice. “Sergei said you would always be protected.”
“Huh?” I look up at him.
“When I went to see him earlier, he told me you’d always be safe and protected. I wonder why he said that.”
“I have no idea, but it’s good that he says I’m protected too, right?”
“Yes, he has always kept his promises to me. This one is just confusing as fuck.”
“It’s going to be alright. We’ll be alright.” I smile up at him and kiss him softly.
“How does a bath sounds to you?” He smiles back.
“Sounds like a really good way to end the night.” I grin and get up, taking his hand and leading him to the massive tub in the bathroom. I never pictured my brother to be the type to enjoy a nice bath, guess everybody has their little secrets. I snicker as I start to fill the tub.
“What’s funny?” Jase starts to strip and I lose any trail of thought. My eyes zero in on his perfectly toned and tattooed body. “Kitten?”
“You were saying?” I look up at him, unashamed.
“Enjoying the view?” He smirks.
“Maybe.” I grin.
“I was asking you what was funny.” He chuckles and helps me out of my clothes.
“Just wondering why my brother has a huge ass tub. He doesn’t seem to be the type to enjoy relaxing baths.”
He chuckles. “I’d rather not think about your brother right now.”
“Neither do I.” I shudder and make a face as I get in the bath. Jason joins me and sits behind me, wrapping his arms around me and leaning us back against the tub.
“This feels good.” He sighs happily behind me. I smile, feeling him relax.
“It really does.” I caress his toned thighs, enjoying this peaceful moment. We might not be able to share many more in the near future so I might as well enjoy the now and worry about the future later.
We stay silent for a couple of minutes before any of us speaks again.
“Thank you,” he whispers.
“What for?” I whisper back.
“For not judging me or thinking any less of me.”
I turn around in the bath and lean over, brushing my lips over his.
“No need to thank me.” I smile at him.
“Too late.” He grins and brushes my hair away from my face. “You’re beautiful.”
I can’t help the blush taking over my face. “So are you.”
“I’m no-”
“Don’t you even dare.” I squint my eyes at him and ball my fists just above the water.
“Alright, y
ou big meanie.” He chuckles and wraps me in his arms.
“That’s better.”
“Turn around.” He smiles and gets the shampoo.
“Don’t have to tell me twice.” I grin and sit properly between his legs as he starts to lather my hair and gently massages my scalp. It feels like heaven. I don’t know how long he spends washing my hair and massaging my scalp, but I start to doze off.
“Don’t fall asleep on me.” He chuckles.
“Sorry, it’s so relaxing.”
“I see that. Come on, I’ll rinse and we can go get some sleep.” He makes good on his promise and helps me climb out of the bath; I’m way too relaxed to function properly.
He gets us dried and into bed. I lay half on top of him and he doesn’t seem to mind. I’m not too sure if I hear him right or if I’m imagining things, but I think I hear him say that he loves me before I fall asleep.
CHAPTER 12
Jason
This morning with Nicole was much better than yesterday’s. There was loads of sex, no fighting, good food and good coffee, everything a man needs to start his day the right way. Unfortunately I couldn’t stay with her, duty called.
I’m surprised Nicole still wants me after knowing about my past and most importantly, understands it and accepts it. I should have given her more credit.
I don’t know where we’re heading, but I know now more than ever that I’ll never be able to walk away from her. Since that fateful night we first met, she stole my heart and never gave it back. She is the only thing in my life that makes me feel content. I just hope that when all of this dies down, Aleck and Gabe will be as understanding.
This morning I have a meeting with the sheriff to talk about the failed plan and other things he couldn’t tell me over the phone. To say I’m worried is putting it mildly. I know Lewis wouldn’t run her mouth, but what if someone else had found the paper first. I could be in deep shit. I don’t have much time to dwell on it as I park in front of the station.
I walk straight to the sheriff’s office, not wanting to waste any time. I knock on the door and walk in as the door was ajar.
“Morning Dereck. You wanted to see me?”
“Morning Sanders. Yes. Sit down. We have a lot to talk about.” He arranges a couple of files on his desk.
“A lot? What’s going on?” I sit down as he rounds his desk and closes the door.
“Russian mafia is in town along with those bastards from the Hades’ Disciples. Do you know anything about that?”
“I was aware of the Disciples, but not the Russian mafia. What makes you think they are here?” I ask, trying to keep a straight face, not wanting to give anything away.
“Of course. Russian guns were found in a hangar that belongs to the Disciples.” He sighs.
“Do you think they are teaming up?”
“I can’t be sure about anything. It seemed odd though, like they were put there to incriminate or put the target on the Russians’ back instead of theirs. They are all in the evidence room if you want to check it out later.”
“Will do.” That’s weird. If Sergei was up to something he would have told me as I’m usually the one setting them up.
“I heard your plan was a bust yesterday, sorry about that. They seem to be laying low as no one has reported anything since they were last seen in Baton Rouge. Either something has spooked them or they are setting up camp and are planning something.”
“Or someone tipped them off.”
“That’s a possibility too.”
“Where was that hangar where you found the guns?” I ask him perplexed.
“Old Kings’ territory, why?”
“Right. The Kings dealt with the Russians in the past until they fucked the Russians over, the Russians didn’t like it and managed to kill a few of the Kings. I remember hearing something about the Kings wanting revenge for what the Russians did to them, they could be setting them up. It would take our focus from the Disciples and put it onto the Russians.”
“You might be onto something. They seemed to have been placed there specifically to be found.” He sighs, no doubt frustrated by all of this.
“We just need to be careful and keep an eye out for the Disciples. It looks like they’re not targeting anyone in particular, just hurting anyone they can.”
“We will. Don’t worry. We’ll put those scumbags behind bars.”
“I was thinking more like six feet under.” I chuckle.
“That’s where they belong that’s for sure. What’s your position with the Hangman?”
“What do you mean?” I look at him confused. Where did that come from?
“How close are you to them?”
“We worked well together on taking the Kings down.”
He nods. “Don’t stay too close to them. They won’t be beneficial to your life, especially considering what’s coming our way.”
“Duly noted.” I’m not happy with his assumptions and how this discussion is going.
“You won’t listen to me, will you?”
“It’s complicated.”
“Sounds like woman trouble.” He chuckles and sobers up. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay and yes, I’m close to them. We worked well together in the past and they’d be instrumental in helping to take the Disciples down.”
“They would, but I’m not going to give them immunity for their good deeds. If in the process of taking the Disciples down they are caught, there’s not much I’ll be able to do.”
I scoff. “You could let them go freely for helping the city you’re supposed to protect, you’d just choose not to. Are we done?”
“We are.”
I nod and get up to leave. “Sanders, be careful. You’re playing with fire and you’re going to get burned if you stay too close.”
“Good day Dereck.” I walk out of his office and into mine.
I don’t know why it’s pissing me off this much that he’d use the Hangman’s help against them. I am too close. I’m well aware of that but there’s no going back though. Even if there were, I’m not sure I would. For the past six years I’ve been doing something I loathe, impersonating people I can’t stand, working alongside the Hangman has made me feel like I mattered and was useful. It’ll all be over once my cover is blown, it’s going to be a fucking mess. I’ll be back to being on my own with no friends, no family and no Nicole.
I try to focus on work, I have to fill out reports for yesterday’s failure. I can’t help but take look at Nicole’s file, there’s nothing much there except what I already knew. It takes me a while, but I manage to dig deeper and hack into a separate system, a better protected one so corrupt cops don’t find them. It turns out that they have a huge fucking file on her, things I had no idea about. I’m shocked by what I’m seeing. She can’t be linked to him.
I feel fucking numb. How could she do that? How could he do that! I’m fucking seething.
I’m brought out of my train of thought by my phone ringing.
“Hello?”
“Jason. Jason. Jason. What a pleasure to hear your voice again.”
“Slider.” I nearly growl.
“Easy tiger. Did you like my little welcome back note?”
“What do you want?”
“You dead. Simple as that.”
“That’ll never happen.”
“You really think you’ll be able to escape us again? The Kings were weak. They had orders to go after you but they were too fucking scared and it backfired on them.”
“I don’t need to escape you, you were never able to hurt me before and you won't be able to now.”
“We’ll see about that. You’ll pay for what you did and so will Nicole.” He chuckles darkly.
“Don’t you dare touch her. I’m not afraid of you, Slider.”
“You should be. You won’t like what I have in store for you unless you tell me what I want to know, then you won’t suffer too much and neither will she. You’ll still be dead, but it’ll be quick, your choice
.”
“I’ll never talk and you know that.”
“Good, it’ll make things more interesting. I’ll see you really soon.” He hangs up before I have the chance to say anything else.
I can’t fucking believe him. I still don’t get why they are making such a big deal out of it, if they wanted Nicole and I dead, they've had plenty of occasions to end us. What’s in it for them?
CHAPTER 13
Nicole
I’m back to studying and it sucks fucking balls. With all that’s happening, the last thing on my mind is my finals. My head is still spinning from what Jase went through when he was younger. I feel for him, even though my parents were killed, I didn’t have to witness it or be raised by total strangers who didn’t always have the best intentions. I had my brother with me who made sure I was kept away from the violence of our world, for the most part. Jase didn’t have that chance. He had to witness violence upfront and even partake in it. I can’t imagine who in their right fucking mind would ask a fourteen year old to torture someone. That’s fucking sick.
I turn the pages of my book angrily and see a folded note. Huh, I don’t remember putting that there. I open it and I wish I hadn’t.
I’M THE MAN YOU KILLED THAT DAY
I’M THE CRIME THAT YOU HID
YOU CAN TRY BUT YOU’LL NEVER FORGET WHAT YOU DID
This can’t be happening.
He’s dead, gone, long gone.
I hope it’s some kind of sick fucking joke, but I know better. I grab my phone to call Jase, but someone rings the doorbell at that exact time. I take a couple of deep breaths, trying to calm myself down, but I’m a scared, nervous wreck. My worst nightmare is happening. Someone knows.
I open the door and don’t recognize the person right away. Their face is familiar, but I can’t place them.
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