by T L Gray
Jake perked up at the mention of counseling, and mercifully, the discussion shifted away from me to questions about college classes and case studies. I learned that Jake had recently switched his major from finance to counseling. Jake also mentioned that Matt ran the office for an anger management counselor.
“Is that how you two met?” The question seemed innocent enough, but suddenly the room got quiet.
Jake seemed to be the only one who was comfortable with my question. “Yes, it was. There was a time when I couldn’t stand this guy, but that was just because him and Bruce were determined to turn me into a decent guy. I guess in the end they won out.”
Naomi smiled warmly at him, squeezing his hand. “You were always decent. Just a little lost.”
Jake leaned over and kissed his wife, causing Matt to make some sarcastic comment about getting a room. Laughter erupted at Naomi’s beet-red face and immediately the atmosphere felt relaxed again.
“Can I help you clean up?” I offered, stacking silverware on my plate.
“No way—you just moved in.” Naomi patted my arm. “I’m sure you have a ton of work waiting at home.”
I lowered my head to my hands and shook it. “Oh, you have no idea. I went to estate sales yesterday and hit the jackpot. Got every piece of furniture I wanted. Only problem is, the people dropped everything off just inside my doorway. I managed to move the couch, but the entertainment center is impossible.”
Naomi shot Jake a look and cleared her throat.
“Matt and I would be happy to help you move it, if you’d like,” he quickly offered.
I spun my head toward Matt. The glare he was giving Jake made it clear that he was less than thrilled about being volunteered for the task.
“It’s okay, really,” I said. “I found a moving company and I’m going to give them a call tomorrow.”
“Don’t be silly. Jake and Matt live for this stuff, don’t you, boys? They’re constantly talking smack about who is stronger or faster, and now they can prove it.” Naomi sent Matt a wicked smile before continuing. “I’m sure it’s the least they can do after I slaved over their meal.”
When both guys reluctantly agreed, Naomi winked in my direction, leaving me to marvel at her persuasive abilities, especially since they saved me from wasting money on a moving crew.
“Okay, great.” I gathered some plates to clear. “I really appreciate it.”
Naomi shooed us away from the mess, insisting on doing all the work. I gave her a quick hug before stepping outside, thanking her for lunch. Matt was the next one out the door, and he walked straight to a huge motorcycle parked next to the curb. He straddled the massive machine with his strong legs and waited.
Of course he had a bike, because his gorgeous face, strong and cut body, and bad-boy tattoos weren’t attractive enough.
My body betrayed me, moving closer to touch the shiny metal. Dangerous. Exciting. Not much different from the man in front of me.
His eyes met mine and narrowed. “What’s the matter, Duchess? Never seen a Harley before?”
“Yes, of course I have. I just didn’t realize this beast was yours.”
“So where are we going?” He pulled out his helmet and leaned against the bike’s handlebars while waiting for my response. My heart fluttered. Why does he appeal to me so much? Maybe because he had a toughness about his face, a hardness that went beyond his strong bone structure. Or maybe it was the eyes—the sporadic mix of browns, greens, and blues—that would look happy one minute and tortured the next. Whatever the reason, I had to seriously get a grip on myself.
“Um, Raintree Apartments, on Lincoln. Number 154.”
He laughed and shook his head. “Nice try. Seriously, where do you live?”
I moved closer, not understanding why he was laughing. “That’s where I live. Why is that funny?”
He eyed me closely and set his jaw. “I lived in those apartments a few years ago. It’s not exactly the Ritz, nor is it a place I’d recommend for a girl living on her own.”
Why did he always insult me? “For your information, I did my research and they are perfectly safe. Residents only reported three cases of theft, all vehicle related, and two of them happened when the owners left their purses in the car.”
“The key word there, Duchess, is reported. Did your research happen to inform you that they are located only two blocks from the worst street in the city? I’ve seen some lethal gang action take place in that parking lot. You need to be careful.”
His face blurred as fear threatened what was left of my crumbling resolve.
Matt must have seen me falter, because he reached out to steady me, wrapping his calloused hand around my elbow. Startled by the immediate jolt his touch sent, my voice hitched. “I will.”
Somehow, despite the mention of gangs and the insinuation of unreported crime, his steady hand made me feel safe and protected.
“You guys ready?”
Matt quickly dropped his grip at the sound of Jake’s voice. The brief moment of concern was now replaced with that wall of bitterness that stood between us.
“Yes. Just let me punch my address into the GPS first. I still don’t know my way around.” I hoped my voice wasn’t shaking as much as my hands were.
Matt pulled his helmet on in a huff. “Don’t bother. I know exactly where that is. Just follow me.”
I fell in line behind Matt’s Harley and saw Jake’s car move in behind mine. It, too, was a Mercedes, which grated on my nerves. I reasoned that Matt’s rudeness was connected to the things he mentioned when we first met—my car, clothes, and accessories. But Jake and Naomi had a great condo and nice vehicles, and yet Matt didn’t show any resentment toward their status. He just made no sense at all.
Ten minutes later, we pulled into the parking lot of my complex and I noticed a couple of things I hadn’t before. One being that the fence surrounding the complex was missing several panels. Two, the entire building was in serious need of new exterior paint.
Determined not to spook myself, I parked and put on a smile for the boys. I’d picked this place for a reason, I reminded myself. It was only minutes from the children’s center, and I needed to understand their world to be of any use to the organization.
Jake stepped out of his car and warily looked around before mustering a fake smile. He had a lot more tact than Matt did, so I wasn’t surprised when he just said, “Interesting place.”
Matt approached from behind. “It’s a dump.”
“It’s much nicer on the inside.” I slid my key in the lock, still trying to get rid of the unease that was now settling in my stomach. “Watch your step. That entertainment center is literally right in front of the door.”
Grateful that the apartment was tidy, I sidestepped the massive piece. The guys followed. “I have some moving straps you can use to get it off the ground. It’s going right up against the wall over there.”
“Nah, we got it,” Jake said, dismissing the offer.
I stepped away, unwilling to argue. Matt and Jake walked around the large console and then, after a three count, attempted to lift. Nothing budged and they both let go.
I tried not to laugh, but a giggle escaped my lips. “So do you want those straps now?”
Jake smiled. “Yeah. This thing must weigh a ton. How did they even get it in here?”
I thought back to the four guys who had haphazardly moved the piece into my apartment and shuddered. “Not very gracefully, which is why it’s sitting right there.”
Matt still hadn’t said a word. Instead, he was looking around my living room as if taking inventory of everything I owned. Had he noticed the missing drapes or cracks on the ceiling? Probably.
His intensity made me nervous but at the same time intrigued me, because it was paired with this unwavering calm. A calm that contradicted the dark storm raging in his eyes. The draw was more than physical. I wanted to get inside his head and figure him out, get past that shield he seemed so determined to raise.
&n
bsp; Jake and Matt hooked up the straps and easily moved the piece to the far wall. I was elated. Sure, the green paint hid its beauty, but I could already see how stunning it was going to be.
“Is that it?” Jake approached, pulling me from my thoughts.
“Yep.”
Matt noticed the bed frame lying against my hallway wall. “We can put that together for you if you want.”
“That’s okay. I don’t even have a mattress yet.”
He turned his piercing hazel eyes to me again. “What are you sleeping on?”
Feeling exposed, I started to stumble over my words. “I, um, brought an air mattress. It’ll work fine until I can afford the real deal.”
Matt’s eyebrows went up at the word afford.
Jake cleared his throat and pulled out a card. “Call me if you need anything. I also put Naomi’s cell number on the back.” He looked around my place, making me realize how run-down it looked compared to his and Naomi’s condo. “I mean it. We’re just a few minutes away.”
I took the card gratefully. “Thanks, Jake. And tell Naomi thanks again for lunch.”
He turned to look at Matt, who had moved my TV and was now pulling wires through the back of the new entertainment center.
Matt shrugged. “I’m going to finish this up.”
A satisfied grin appeared as Jake retreated. “Okay, well, I’ll see you guys around.” With that, he walked out and I was left completely alone with Matt, unable to gather any sort of intelligible thought.
“Do you want a drink?” I opened the fridge, desperate for something to do with my hands. “I have lemonade or water.”
With the TV all hooked up, Matt took a seat at one of the barstools I’d placed along the counter. He immediately started watching me again, expressionless and with that infuriating calm.
Slamming the fridge door, I crossed my arms. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Like what?”
“Like I’ve grown an extra head or something.”
He smiled, and once again my breath caught in my chest. It wasn’t the first time I’d seen him grin, but it was the first time he’d directed one at me.
“You baffle me.”
Surprised by his words, I let my arms fall to my sides. “I don’t know why. I’m an open book.”
Matt walked over to me and leaned back against the counter. The kitchen area was small, only a narrow space, and the clean scent of the soap he’d used that morning was undeniably masculine. The hair on the back of my neck began to prickle. He was too close, too appealing. I backed up to the far side of the kitchen. I needed some distance between us.
He watched me carefully as he spoke. “Then explain to me why it is you drive a seventy-thousand-dollar car and yet live in one of the worst apartment complexes in the city. Why you act and dress like you spent most of your life with a silver spoon in your mouth, yet you can’t even afford to buy yourself a decent mattress.”
I took a deep breath, stalling. I’d never been embarrassed about my parents’ money before, but for some reason his words made me squirm. “The car was a gift, as were the clothes. My life is different now.” I didn’t know how else to explain my situation without going into more detail than he needed to know or I wanted to share.
Matt’s face hardened as he pushed off from the counter. “Well, the guy should have at least put you up in a place nicer than this.”
He grabbed his keys just as it dawned on me what he was thinking.
“Hey, wait a second!” I yelled, outrage filling my stomach as I grabbed his arm to stop him from leaving. I was much like my father in that way—very, very slow to anger—but Matt had pushed the last button. “My parents gave me that car along with everything else that irritates you so much. I don’t know what I did to give you such a terrible opinion of me, but don’t you dare imply I’m someone’s mistress. Nor am I some snobby rich girl who happened to turn up on the wrong side of the tracks. What I am is someone with feelings. Feelings that you seem set on hurting every time you open your mouth.”
As soon as I finished my rant, I was exhausted. I hated conflict, hated losing my temper or even raising my voice. I let go of Matt’s arm and turned around. No way was I giving him the satisfaction of seeing the tears trail down my cheeks.
The room fell silent. Thick tension hung in the air, cut only by the sounds of our mutual breathing.
“I’m sorry, Grace.” The soft crack in his voice said more than his quick apology.
The front door shut and I turned, feeling the emptiness of his abrupt exit. I realized it was the first time Matt had said my name out loud. I should have still been mad at him, appalled even, but I could only think of how much I liked hearing the word Grace spill out of his mouth.
Chapter 5
* * *
MATT
It was another restless night for me, but not because of nightmares. Instead, I was haunted by the sad blue eyes of a woman who somehow managed to awaken every part of me.
I hadn’t meant to be cruel, but anger took hold at the thought of any other guy touching her. And I don’t know why I even had that thought to begin with. Grace hadn’t given any signal that she was that type of girl. While gorgeous to look at, never once did she flirt with me or with Jake. In fact, all evidence indicated that she was sincere and somewhat shy.
Maybe I just wanted to find a flaw, any flaw that would end this quickly growing infatuation.
My mind worked overtime as I lay there trying to fall asleep. Thoughts of Maggie came back to me for the first time in years. I could see her seductive smile as it broke through her fake innocence. Oh, how enamored I had been with her, possessed even. At the time I thought it was true love. But that girl was kerosene to my fire, and her memory was exactly what I needed to remind myself why I’d chosen to be single.
My attraction to Grace yesterday was intense, as was the jealousy that came immediately after I misunderstood her words. Jealousy I hadn’t felt since the night I’d kicked Maggie out for good. The night I became like my father.
Feeling a shiver run down my spine, I threw off the covers and found my way outside to the hammock. Stars above me stretched on for miles. The night air was only slightly cooler than the afternoon heat, but it felt fresh with all my landscaping in full bloom.
“My sanctuary.” I closed my eyes and listened to the sounds of nature. Field crickets chirped while rustling leaves scraped the rooftop as the soft night breezes swept across my face. A calm fell over me, taking away the stress that had kept me tossing all night. Soon my lids went heavy as sleep finally came.
The rising sun awoke me from my slumber at a grueling five thirty in the morning. I had logged maybe three hours of sleep for the third night in a row, and I felt sluggish and irritable. The shower’s hot water massaged my throbbing muscles as I dealt with the aftermath of sleeping in a hammock.
Maybe it was time to talk with Bruce, figure out why I was slipping back into old patterns. I was becoming edgy again and reacting irrationally to even the smallest of things. The thought infuriated me. I’d spent the past year in such a great place emotionally and physically. Call it pride or whatever, but the idea of sitting in that chair opposite Bruce felt like admitting defeat, and I wasn’t one to tap out in a fight.
What I needed was to get out of my head, and stop focusing on my life. Derrick, my “little brother,” had graduated and was heading off to college. The past three years I had spent mentoring him had been challenging yet completely fulfilling.
Liz Bailey, the tough-as-nails director of the Hartsford Center, had called me two weeks ago about a ten-year-old boy. He’d been through three “big brothers” already and had an enormous chip on his shoulder. She had also taken that opportunity to tell me she was leaving the center and would be replaced by the end of the month.
I didn’t want to commit myself to some new kid when I had no idea if I would even get along with her successor, so I quickly declined. She gave me one of her good old tongue-lashings
and then said she’d hold his name as a possibility for me until she left. The conversation had ended with her insisting I was the only match for the troubled boy. Maybe she was right.
Grabbing my phone, I listened to Liz’s most recent voice mail. She had been trying to reach me every day since we’d talked.
“Matt, you need to stop avoiding me. My last day is tomorrow and I’ll be handing everything off to Ms. Covington. I’d like to firm you up on taking Marcus. I don’t want him getting lost in the shuffle.” There was a long pause. “He was suspended last week for fighting. I hated to do it, but the Hartsford policy is clear—no fighting is to be tolerated. I thought maybe you could relate. Anyway, I’m here until three on Monday. Don’t let me down.”
A heavy sigh hung in the air as I threw my phone on the bed. Kneeling, I prayed for guidance and almost immediately felt confirmation that taking Marcus as my “little brother” was the right step forward.
Ten years old, I thought warily. Derrick was fifteen when we’d been paired up. He was eager, studious, and way past the punk attitude of a preteen. I had a bad feeling that Marcus and I were not going to have such a smooth connection.
It was only seven, but Liz would already be at the center. She was a notorious workaholic and an early riser. I figured that I might as well get this over with before I changed my mind.
I lived only fifteen minutes from the children’s center and didn’t have to pass Grace’s apartment on the way, but I still found myself going that direction. Her car was where she’d left it the night before, and the luxury sedan stood out like a sore thumb among the other vehicles in the parking lot.
She didn’t belong there. Trash littered the cracked pavement, with the remnants of drugs and alcohol displayed for all the world to see. The mess was a disturbing reminder that the neighborhood was getting worse every year. Revving the gas, I pushed my bike along, reminding myself that I wasn’t responsible for her safety.
The scene deteriorated as I approached the center. Most of the homes that still had residents were structurally unsound, their rotting wood exposed to the elements. Run-down duplexes covered with graffiti had sprung up everywhere else. I stopped at the corner, shaking my head as a crew threw out the meager belongings of yet another evicted tenant.