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Pioneer, Go Home!

Page 13

by Richard Powell


  The whole time I was talking, Pop set there with a hand up to his face playing with it like it was putty. That made it hard to know what he was thinking. As soon as you figured he looked like he wanted to move to Sunset Gardens right away, he would knead his face around so it looked like Sunset Gardens smelled bad to him. Then the next minute he would pull his face into a big happy grin. It warn't hard to tell what Holly was thinking. She set on her chair like there was splinters in it, and now and then give off little spluttering sounds like a pot ready to boil over.

  When I got through telling them all about it, Holly said right quick, "I vote no."

  Pop said, "I reckon me and Toby both knowed that before you spoke up. Now we got to get a vote from Toby and one from me."

  Holly said, sniffling a bit, "Of course I'll go along with what you two want."

  "I reckon we knowed that too," Pop said. "Well, Toby, what's your vote?"

  "I done the work of finding out about Sunset Gardens," I said. "The least you could do is vote first, Pop."

  "Well, I ain't going to do the least I could do."

  "Pop, this leaves us back where we was this afternoon."

  Holly said, "I know what. We'll have a secret ballot. We'll all write down our vote on slips of paper and put them in a box. Then we can get the twins to read the votes, and nobody will know how anybody else voted."

  "I didn't know them twins can read," Pop said.

  "They can read a little," Holly said. "I've been teaching them. And they can certainly read a simple printed word on a ballot. I'll go call them, and you get slips of paper ready."

  After she brung the twins in, Holly said, "I thought of a good way to do this. In the first place, the question we're voting on is, 'Should we move to Sunset Gardens?' After we write out our votes, we'll fold the ballots and put them in this jar. Teddy will pick out one ballot and read its vote. Then Eddy will pick out a second ballot and read its vote. If both the first two ballots are voted the same way, that will decide things, and we won't read the third ballot. Because if the third ballot wasn't voted the same way as the first two, it wouldn't make any difference in the result, but it would upset all of us to know that we didn't agree."

  That sounded all right to Pop and me. The three of us took sheets of paper from a pad, and got pencils. Holly turned up the kerosene lamp so we could see good. Pop begun printing a letter and then looked up and saw me watching to see if he printed two letters which would be a "NO" or three letters which would be a "YES." When

  Pop saw me watching, he took his vote off to one corner of the shack and kept his back to me, and I went off in the other corner so he couldn't peek at me. We all got the voting done and folded our papers and dropped them in a big glass jar.

  The twins was hopping around like a string of firecrackers going off, and when everybody was ready, Holly told Teddy to reach in and get one vote and open it and read it. He got his hand in all right, but he couldn't get it out till after Holly talked him out of closing his fist tight on the vote. His hand come out easy when he just used his thumb and finger.

  He opened it up and spelled the letters out to himself and then let out a big shout. "It says no," he hollered. "It says No, No, No, No—"

  "Oh, it only says one No," Holly said, taking it from him. "All right, Eddy. Now you get a ballot."

  Eddy got the second vote and had to act more important than Teddy, and spelled it out to himself much longer than Teddy had spelled his out, and Teddy got a little mad and said, "He can't read a simple little word."

  "I can so!" Eddy said. "It says N-O NO, so there."

  Holly said, "Then it's decided that we stay here. I'm so glad."

  "What slowed me up," Eddy said, "was spelling out them other words."

  Holly gave a squeak and grabbed for Eddy's vote and for the other vote in the glass jar, but Pop and me was too quick for her, and I got the vote off Eddy and Pop got the glass jar.

  "Well," I said, after looking at the paper, "I thought this would turn out to be my vote but it's Pop's. And it don't say no at all. What it says is Vote Me with Toby. That's a mean trick you done, Pop."

  "Oh, is it?" Pop said, looking at my vote that he had got from the jar. "What you printed looks to me like, 'I am with Pop.' I never seen a boy so backwards about speaking up his own mind."

  "I did speak up my mind on that paper," I said. "And when Eddy talked about spelling out other words, I thought for sure he had my vote, and I knowed he couldn't get a no out of it."

  "I thought he had my vote," Pop said. "And he couldn't get a no out of mine either. Well, Holly, you must have give the twins a new spelling lesson tonight to make sure all they read would be no."

  I said, "She figured out that trick of only reading two votes so I would think my vote was left in the jar and you would think yours was left in it, Pop. I reckon we wouldn't have caught on to the trick if Eddy hadn't spoke up about spelling out other words."

  Holly began crying, and Teddy kicked Eddy in the shins and said, "You dope, you talked too much!"

  Eddy said, "If you hadn't picked on me and said I can't read a simple little word I wouldn't have said anything but No. So it's your fault!" And Eddy hauled off and hit Teddy in the nose.

  We got them tore apart after a while, and cooled them down and packed them off to bed. Then we went to work on Holly, who was still crying and carrying on about how she was a bad girl and ashamed of herself but she didn't care because we ought to stay at the bridge.

  "Holly," Pop said, "me and Toby don't hold it agin you. It was a good try and would have worked on anybody who is not as smart as me and Toby. And now I kind of wish it had worked and settled things."

  "I kind of wish that too," I said. "So Pop and me are sorry we was too smart for you."

  Holly rubbed a hand over her eyes and said in a choky voice, "Why don't you both admit you want to stay here? I'm sure you do. If I hadn't thought so, I wouldn't have tried that trick."

  "Pop is the head of the family and ought to say what we should do," I said.

  Pop said, "I'm an old man that hasn't got longer to live than thirty or forty years the way us Kwimpers die off, so whatever we do will be more Toby's worry than mine and he ought to speak up."

  We warn't getting anywhere that way, and we all set down and tried to figure what to do about it. While we set there, a knock come on the screen door and who was there but Mr. and Mrs. Will Brown from Sunset Gardens. I brung them in and met them up with Pop and Holly.

  Mr. Brown said, "Ellie and I thought we'd take a run out here and see if we could tell you folks anything more about Sunset Gardens. Did this young man here tell you all about the advantages?"

  "He made it sound pretty good," Pop said. "And he made you folks sound like mighty fine neighbors to have. That pecan pie is the best I ever thrun a lip over."

  "I even told them about the spray truck and no skeeters," I said, feeling glad I hadn't done no cheating about that and about the pies.

  Holly said, "But we hadn't quite decided yet what to do."

  Mr. Brown looked at Mrs. Brown, who nodded at him, and then he said, "Folks, don't do it. Stay right here."

  "This is a surprise," Pop said. "What makes you say that?"

  "I don't know I can really explain it," Mr. Brown said. "All I can say is, once you've lived in a house, you won't like living in a thing they call a unit. What I mean is, you folks wanted a fence and you have one. We wanted a fence and we're not allowed to have one."

  "Oh, I get it," Pop said. "I've run into this before. The government is telling you folks what to do, instead of you telling the government what to do. It don't do no good to let the government get out of hand and uppity."

  "That's it exactly," Mrs. Brown said.

  "Toby didn't tell us none of this," Pop said. "I reckon either he didn't see it, or he held it back on account of wanting to live there."

  "Oh, he didn't like it," Mr. Brown said. "I remember exactly what he said just before he left. He said he could see we had a lot
of advantages, but that he wasn't much used to advantages and would just as soon stay where you are. But he said he'd tell you all about the advantages, and do whatever you wanted."

  Pop looked at me and worked his face into one of them putty grins, and said, "We could of saved a lot of time if you'd spoke up, Toby. On account of I'd ruther stay here, too."

  Holly said, "Well, thank Heaven! I drought I'd never get the two of you to admit it."

  I said, "It's mighty nice of you folks to come out here and see that we didn't make no mistake."

  "The only thing I'm going to miss about Sunset Gardens," Pop said, "is having you folks for neighbors."

  Mr. Brown cleared his throat, and looked at Mrs. Brown who nodded at him, and said, "If you really mean diat, you wouldn't even have to miss us. Would there be a little piece of land here that we could settle down on?"

  Well, the three of us started letting out whoops and cheers and talking so loud we routed out the twins, and they started running around like fire sirens with legs on. It took us a long time to get them quieted down. Then we tried to make sure the Browns knowed about the skeeters and no city water or gas or electricity, and about the hard work and the fight with the Department of Public Improvements and all the things that could go wrong. But the Browns had thought it all out and warn't a bit worried. Mr. Brown said he had a lot of good years as a carpenter ahead of him, and Mrs. Brown said she would set up a little stand to sell the things Mr. Brown made and her own rag rugs and pies and jams and jellies. Then we got the Jenkinses in from across the road and had a high old time. We worked it out that the Browns would build next to the Jenkinses, and we would all have bird houses and our own names on signs in front of our places.

  When it was getting pretty late, Mrs. Brown give a jump and said, "Will, it's past the hour for your pill. It's a green one."

  "Thanks, Ellie," Mr. Brown said. He dug out the bottle of pills and walked onto the porch and opened the screen door and gave that bottle a real good throw. "There," he said. "I bet that went clean over my property across the road."

  "Oh, Will!" Mrs. Brown said. "You have the bursitis and might have wrecked your shoulder doing that."

  Mr. Brown looked a mite worried, and give his arm a test by moving it around. Then he grinned. "What do you know?" he said. "Throwing away that bottle loosened up my shoulder. So those pills finally did me some good."

  Well, that was how we stayed at the bridge and got a pair of nice new neighbors. I reckon you could say everything worked out fine unless you was Miss Claypoole doing the saying. When she heard what had happened, she was real mad and said we would end up sorry we had crossed her. And from the look on her face you could get the idea that when we did end up sorry it wouldn't be by no accident.

  12

  EARLY in September we picked up another set of neighbors. They warn't as nice as the Jenkinses and the Browns, and the way things turned out we would have just as leave done without them. But mostly you don't have much say about wanting or not wanting folks as neighbors, and we got them new ones like you might get the mumps.

  The day they showed up it was near about sunset. We had a rim of snook at the bridge and a pretty good crowd of fishermen, and Pop and Holly and me was busy baiting them up and running soft drinks and sandwiches. A station wagon come along the road from Gulf City dragging the biggest and shiniest trailer you ever seen. That bridge of ours is kind of narrow, and the trailer took up so much room we had to scrunch against the rail to let it by. The station wagon and trailer stopped a little past our fence. Two fellers from the station wagon looked things over, and backed the trailer onto the shell fill until it was setting parallel to the road and maybe fifteen feet off it. Then they unhitched the station wagon and parked it next to the trailer at right angles.

  About that time the snook went crazy and kept us hopping for a couple hours. It was ten at night before the fishermen left and we could look over our new neighbors. By then, four cars had pulled in next to the station wagon, and electric lights was on in the trailer and you could hear a mumble of voices.

  "Pop," I said, "maybe we should pay them a call."

  "What for?" Pop said. "Maybe they is furriners."

  "What is your notion of a furriner, Pop?"

  "A furriner is somebody I don't know and don't want to know."

  "Pop, if you don't know them, how do you work it out that you don't want to know them?"

  "I just use my head, Toby, like you ought to do. Them people come in next to us without a by your leave, so they ain't neighbors of mine and if they ain't neighbors they is most likely furriners."

  Pop is always like that about new people until he gets to know them, so I asked Holly if she wanted to pay a call with me.

  "I don't think I'd better," she said. "I have to get things ready for the twins to start school."

  "I thought they warn't starting until two days from now."

  "They've never been to school before, so it will take a lot of getting ready."

  "I reckon you don't want to visit them new neighbors."

  "To tell the truth," she said, "I feel the way your Pop does. We don't know them, and all the cars and lights are sort of disturbing. But you go if you want to."

  I asked Holly if she minded me taking some coffee in case the new neighbors wanted some. She said she didn't mind, so I heated up a pot, and filled a carton with cups and spoons and a can opener and canned milk and sugar, and headed for the trailer.

  When I was a couple steps away, two fellers jumped out of the station wagon and grabbed me by the arms. One of them said, "Where do you think you're going, punk?"

  The other said, "Speak up, punk."

  I had the pot of coffee in one hand and the carton in my other. "Look out, fellers," I said. "You'll make me spill things."

  "What the hell you got there?" one of them said, reaching for the coffee pot.

  "Yeah, let's have a look," the other said, reaching into the carton.

  It was dark and them fellers didn't know what they was doing, and I didn't have time to tell the one feller diat the coffee pot was just off the fire and to tell the other that the can opener was setting point up in one of the cups. So they found out for themselves. The one that burnt his hand let out a howl, and the one that jabbed his hand let out another howl, and they both jumped back.

  "He got me!" the feller that burnt his hand yelled.

  "Watch out for his knife!" the feller that jabbed himself yelled.

  "Fellers," I said, "if you had only give me a little time—"

  The door of the trailer slid back. A third feller come skidding out like a cat and said, "What is it? What's up?"

  "We grabbed a punk and he must have thrown acid on my hand," one of them called. "It's burning like fire!"

  "Watch it, Blackie!" the other yelled. "He slashed me with a knife!"

  Against the light from the trailer I seen the third feller crouch and grab something from inside his coat. "Don't make a move," he told me in a soft voice. "All right, one of you two. Put a flashlight on him and let's see what gives."

  The feller off to my left put a flashlight beam on me, and I said, "Fellers, if you would all just take a deep breath and count to ten we will get along easier. I hate to say it because I don't want to get nobody sore, but you're all jumping before you know if anything is worth jumping at."

  The feller they called Blackie said, "If he can throw acid and pull a knife while he's carrying all that stuff, maybe we better fire you creeps and take him on. Gimme that light and let me see." He took the flashlight and walked up to me and looked at what I was carrying. "Well, Al," he said, "your acid turns out to be a pot of boiling coffee and I guess you splashed some onto your hand. And Carmine, the only thing he could have pulled on you is a can opener."

  The first two fellers come up to me and took a look for themselves. One of them said, "Why didn't you tell us what you was carrying, punk?"

  "A wise guy," the other said. "Wait till we give you a going over."

&
nbsp; "Fellers, fellers!" I said. "I'm from next door and just trying to act neighborly. You never give me a chance to say nothing. I am real sorry you got hurt."

  Al said, "This guy is not only a punk but a yellow punk too. Listen to him crawl."

  "Ah, relax," Blackie said. "The guy's only trying to be friendly. What's your name, buddy?"

  "Toby Kwimper," I said. "Pop and Holly and me and the twins live in that shack the other side of the fence."

  "Hiya, Toby," he said. "I'm Blackie Zotta. I'd offer to shake hands but maybe I wouldn't be any luckier than Al and Carmine were. Al, you and Carmine get back in the station wagon and let this guy alone. Come on in and meet the boss, Toby."

  I followed him into the trailer and seen he was a nice- looking feller only two or three inches shorter than me but not more than maybe a hundred eighty pounds weight. He had hair that looked like he used black shoe polish on it, and a little strip of moustache and a lot of white teeth he wore out in the open. One thing he didn't wear out in the open was a bulge under his coat where I reckon he carried a gun.

  "Nice setup, huh, Toby?" he said. "Generator for electricity and everything. Look it over."

  Where we come in was a little kitchen that was mostly stainless steel, and off to the right a bedroom with a couple beds in it. On the left was a door and I heard fellers talking back of it. First somebody told a feller named Little Joe to come on. Then there was some mumbling, and somebody told a feller to stay away from snake eyes which I wouldn't think you would want to get close to anyways.

  I said, "This is real nice and I reckon you can live in it good, but I will take a house that stays put and don't go running around the country."

  "You can get used to anything," Blackie said. "I admit I go for a hotel and room service. But I'll take this in a pinch, and in fact I'll take this instead of a pinch. That's a good one, huh? I'll take this instead of a pinch."

 

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