by B. A. Wolfe
“Okay, call me tomorrow love.” I told her I loved her and flipped the phone closed, placing it on the nightstand next to the bed.
A deep sigh escaped me, deflating my body as I weighed the decision I had just made. It was deeper than just waiting it out for my car and not wanting Mel to come pick me up. Not only did Mel have a life of her own to attend to without wasting a day to come and rescue my ass, but also something inside me made me want to stay here for other reasons. It could have been the kindness of Trish and Jason or the fact that I could be this lost girl around them and not have to worry about it. It didn’t hurt that Trish would be here to talk to if I wanted the chance to discuss my pregnancy with someone. She already knew what was going on and could be a lending shoulder, ear, or voice.
Perhaps it was something about their warm hearts and open arms that screamed to me because I missed having that in my life. I knew deep down in my core I was craving that sort of affection, and here it was, magically landing in my lap. I’d be a fool not to at least accept the attention and wait for my car, all the while, enjoying their company. I guess we would find out just how big of a fool I really was when all was said and done.
Six
I FINALLY LAID MY HEAD down on the pillow and thought about what a journey this was turning into. Here I was, thinking that things couldn’t get any worse, and then life laughed at me and threw a damn tree in my way. I was grateful that I wasn’t sleeping in a motel like last night. I needed to get some rest. My body was mentally and physically exhausted. I let my eyelids shut and fell fast asleep only to wake up parched a couple hours later. I tore the covers off of me thinking that maybe I was just overheated. I lay there for a few minutes contemplating the thought of needing versus wanting water. It was needed. I stood up out of the bed, slipped on a pair of cotton shorts and tiptoed out into the hallway. I couldn’t help but feel a little strange about walking around their home while they were asleep.
“Hello there.” A shadow from the kitchen table with a deep husky voice said.
“AHHH!” I screamed and all but jumped out of my skin when the voice rumbled through my body.
“Easy does it little lady, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said calmly, still sitting at the table.
There was enough light from the rising sun peeking through the windows that I could slightly make out his features. He was older with a full head of hair, and I couldn’t help but guess that it was Jason’s dad, Bart. I breathed out deeply, and quickly wiped around my frontal area, making sure I didn’t piss myself when he scared me from out of nowhere. I was good. I slowly made my way to the kitchen table where he was sitting.
“You must be Bart,” I said, still breathing heavy from being so frightened of the shadowed figure at the table.
“You must be Cassandra, the girl from the hospital,” he said in a husky voice that could give some actors a run for their money. It reminded me of one you’d hear in an old western movie, slow and easy.
“Yes, that’d be me,” I answered back. I wasn’t sure what to expect of his dad, and I thought we would have met in an entirely different way. Definitely not in the wee hours of the morning like this.
“Here, have a seat,” he said, pointing to the chair he just rose from.
“Okay,” I quietly said, walking over to the chair awaiting my arrival.
He slid my chair in as I sat down then walked over to the chair directly across from my seat. His eyes were squinted while he looked me over. I swallowed a deep gulp and let out the breath I had been holding when he shifted in his chair, putting one arm behind him on the back of it.
“Well, the good news is you definitely look a lot better than the tree, Darlin’,” he said.
He was just like his son or vice versa. They just couldn’t help but tease me. I felt relieved to know this man wasn’t as scary as his deep voice led me to believe. I let out a slight chuckle. I guess I had to get over the fact that I was forever going to be known as the girl who hit the tree.
“Thanks Bart.”
“How are you feeling, Darlin’?” he asked.
I was scared, lonely, lost, desperate, needy, and pathetic. So many emotions. I had never felt this way before, and I wasn’t enjoying feeling any of it. I needed to get back to being me, but that was half the problem. The Cassandra I was before may have been stronger and much less scared, but that girl lived for everyone else and was just as pathetic in a much different sense. I gazed up at Bart.
“I’m okay, just a little….” I sat, thinking of the right word to tell him.
“Lost?” he asked with a raised brow.
Bingo. I felt like he didn’t know exactly how lost I really was. Instead, he just knew I ended up lost in this town I’ve never even heard of.
“Something like that,” I replied.
“We’ll get you back on track. You’re in good hands. Jason is as good as they come, and well, Trish, she is the rock of this family. I’d be lost without those two,” he said as he stood up from his chair.
“They’ve been really helpful,” I told him, glad to hear how much he cherished his family. “Thanks again for letting me stay here, Bart.”
“Don’t mention it, anything we can do to help. Water? I presume that is what you were coming out here for.” He was good. I nodded my head eagerly.
“Yes, please,” I said kindly while he poured some water into a tall glass.
“I couldn’t help but notice that you’re up pretty early,” I mentioned to him, curious as to why he was up.
“You don’t miss a beat do you?” he asked, bringing my water to the table and taking a seat back in his chair.
I shook my head. “No, sorry.” Once again, I was being too nosy as Jason would say. This family didn’t seem like the type for questions, and here I was full of too many. He let out a soft chuckle; it was just like Jason’s, very contagious.
“It’s quite alright. I was actually just letting myself wake up before I head out for work,” he said, peering out the kitchen window at the moonlit sky. Work? That was extremely early. I was an early riser, but holy crap.
“Farm life. Up before the sun,” he said.
I hadn’t ever been around a farm before. I’ve seen them in movies, the hot guys with their tractors, boots, and cowboy hats, but that was as far as it went.
He got up from his chair and put his hands on the back of it.
“Get some rest, okay? I heard you had a pretty rough accident.” He peered at me, and, with the light from the window hitting his face, I noticed that his eyes were green. Even though they didn’t appear to be emerald stones like Jason’s, they were still comforting to look at.
“Thank you Bart, I will,” I assured him. “Don’t work too hard.”
“I always do, Cassandra.” He patted the back of the chair before making his way out of the kitchen.
I wasn’t sure what to expect from his dad. Jason didn’t give me much information on him other than that he worked on the farm, but he seemed nice. He was a little intense at first, but definitely a dad who just seemed to have a lot on his plate and his mind.
I sat in silence for the next few minutes sipping my glass of water, before going back to bed, when I heard the door in the back of the kitchen creak open. I held my breath and quickly turned in my chair. It was faint, but I could see Jason stalking out of the doorway through the kitchen. I put my hand to my chest, trying to catch my breath.
“You scared me,” I panted.
“That’s not hard to do,” he said, sounding amused. “I heard you scream when I was headed upstairs and I heard my dad talking to you.” He walked over to the cabinet and grabbed a glass, filling it with water.
“I was wondering if my scream woke anyone up,” I said.
He turned from the sink, and he made his way over to the table, sitting down in the chair his father had sat in.
“I would have saved you, but you needed to meet him and I figured he’d like you enough not to scare you away,” he said.
“H
e seems nice. A little intimidating at first, sitting at the table in the dark,” I said. “He does have a strong voice though. It was very…” I sat trying to think of the right word as Jason leaned toward me.
“Intense,” he whispered.
“Yes, exactly.” I agreed.
He leaned back into his chair. “He definitely does have a profound voice, but deep down he’s a sensitive guy. He is a hard worker, and he likes things to be in order, but that’s just because of the way he was raised. The only time I’ve ever heard his voice go soft was when he cried,” he said, gazing out the window, getting lost in his own words. Just like his dad was doing.
“So deep down, he’s a teddy bear?” I asked teasingly, trying to ease Jason.
He quickly returned his gaze to meet mine. “I’ve never heard anyone call him that before. I wouldn’t go that far, but you get the idea.”
“I understand the term teddy bear, but I’ve actually never seen a dad act like one. Especially…” I stopped myself. I didn’t know how much I should discuss my family. It wasn’t as though I was going to see this family ever again once I got my car back and hit the road in the correct direction, but it also wasn’t something that was worth discussing, not like he could do anything to help.
“Especially what?” he asked, breaking the silence as I sat thinking about how I understood now why it was hard for Jason to discuss his family with me. We barely knew each other. It wasn’t normal to just word vomit your life story to strangers, but I started now, it would be impossible not to finish.
“Especially my father.” I shrugged. “No teddy bear there. He and my mother are very firm and strict. They want things done their way, or it literally would be the highway for my ass, no questions asked,” I finally told him. I let out a heavy exhale. “I don’t normally share information like that. I don’t know why I just did.” The look on his face made me regret telling him.
“For starters, don’t be sorry, Cassandra. It’s good to share things like that. Sometimes, it can help take away the pain and frustration bottled up inside,” he said, pausing long enough to take a sip of water. “Secondly, sharing details about family is hard for all of us.” I knew exactly how he must have felt now. I leaned back in my seat; embarrassed by all the uncomfortable questions that I put him through yesterday. “And lastly, are they why you’re running?”
The words slipped out of his mouth like water coming out of a faucet, fast and in full force. I didn’t know how he knew I was running. All I told him when we met was I was headed to Alamosa to see a friend. I didn’t want to share anything else about my situation with him.
“I’m not running Jason.” I said, trying to convince him and myself of the lie I was telling. “I’m just going to visit my friend in Alamosa, that’s all.”
He sat across from me, still and expressionless. There was nothing on his face I could read. It was like looking at a mime that suddenly stopped their act.
“Honest,” I said, trying to show him I had nothing to hide. Except I did. I had everything to hide and run away from. How could someone who barely knew you, know you so well? He continued to stare at me, moving his head from one side to the other, as though he was investigating my expressions.
“I don’t know, Cassie,” he muttered. “I just don’t believe you. You seem like you’re running from something or someone. I know lost eyes when I see them.”
Jason was easy to be around, but this secret, being pregnant and running away, wasn’t easy to share. He would just have to let it go. “I guess you can think what you want Jason.”
“Come here for a sec.” He stood up and nudged his head in the direction of the hallway.
I wasn’t sure what he was up to, but I followed him anyway. He walked into the bathroom, and I stood next to him quietly as he turned on the light. He took his hand and cupped my chin, searching my forehead. I couldn’t help but watch him as he did. He looked my head over diligently, not missing one inch of my face.
“Your cut needs some attention.” He removed his hand from my chin and grabbed a tube out of the medicine cabinet. “I’m going to put some ointment on it for you okay?” He arched a brow at me.
This was all new to me, a guy caring for me in this way. I was in a state of shock as he put the ointment on my forehead. He dabbed it on gently and smoothed it over my cut so softly, I would have never known he was doing it if it weren’t for him standing in front of me.
“That’s better.” He finished and put the cap back on the tube.
“Thank you,” I said. “And I really am okay otherwise, Jason.”
It was a last attempt to convince him, but I could tell he still didn’t believe me. Hell, I didn’t believe me. There was one thing I was good at, and that was people-pleasing, because I did it all my life, but lying, I didn’t do well. This surprised me because, throughout my life, I did what everyone else wanted, even though I wasn’t happy with it, thinking I had no other choice. So why was lying so much different? Maybe it wasn’t the lying but maybe lying to Jason. He seemed, in only a matter of a day, to know me better than anyone else had, aside from Melanie. He could see through the façade that I put on all my life.
“It’s okay Sweetheart, when you’re ready,” he said. He definitely didn’t believe me, but at least he wasn’t pushing either. All I had to do was get my car, go on my way, and he would never have to know.
Seven
THE SUNLIGHT GLARING THROUGH the window hit my eyes as I peeled them open one at a time. I felt more exhausted and bent out of shape than the day before. The meet and greet with Bart, and then talking with Jason made it hard to get much sleep. I sat up and stretched my arms above my head before I rushed to the bathroom. I was ready to relieve myself from the buckets of water I had last night when I heard a light knock on the door.
“Come in,” I said, wondering whom it could be. It opened slowly as Jason, dressed in yet another pair of fitted jeans, V-neck tee, and cowboy boots, came walking in. I couldn’t help but gaze all the way from his boots to the slight waves that topped his head. Everything just worked. I’m pretty sure it was the jeans that cupped his ass perfectly or the tee that hugged his chest just enough to show his muscles underneath, but either way he was looking good. The look was complete with the same wide smile that seemed to always be plastered on his face. I wished I knew his secret to smiling all the time.
“Good Morning or I guess almost afternoon,” he said. I looked around, there wasn’t a clock in this room, and I had no clue what time it actually was. “It’s almost noon, you must have been tired.” He put both arms on the end of the bed, hovering down over my legs, his muscles flexing as he held himself up. It was hard not to take notice.
“Wow, I never sleep that late,” I said, still trying to wake up and take my focus off of him hovering over me. I was always an early riser for classes, so this was completely out of sorts for me, but I guess without any classes to attend I was out of sorts.
I grabbed his phone from the nightstand next to me and slid it down the bed to him. “Thanks again, I was able to call my friend last night. All is good, she might be calling you though, and, as in might, I mean will be,” I warned him.
He let out a soft chuckle before grabbing the phone and stuffing it in his front pocket. “To make sure I haven’t chopped you up and killed you yet?”
“Exactly,” I assured him, nodding.
“I’ll make sure to let her know I’m keeping you safe.”
“Nice picture, by the way,” I eyed him with a glare, trying to change the subject so I could stop blushing.
“I thought you’d get a kick out of that. That old tree has been around since I can remember and then you came along and showed it who was boss.” He laughed.
“I think it showed me who was boss,” I said, still feeling the pain it caused me days later. I sat there for a moment rubbing my neck when a strange but familiar feeling snuck up on me.
“You okay?” he asked, gazing at me with those alarmed eyes I was getting
all too used to seeing.
I could feel it again, the need to run, and quick. I cupped my hand over my mouth, shoved the blankets to the side as I ran past Jason, and went straight for the bathroom. Kneeling before the toilet, I purged up nothing but bile again. The acid was burning my raw throat even more today than yesterday. I let it come up twice more before I noticed Jason standing in the doorway holding a washcloth. I leaned myself against the wall across from the toilet, letting myself take a moment to recover. He walked in and bent down right next to me as he began to wipe my mouth off. I grabbed the washcloth from his hands, unsure how to feel about him cleaning my face and finished the job. I wiped my forehead with the other side of it and put it beside me when I was done.
“You really don’t need to be this helpful,” I told him as I leaned my head back against the wall. I extended my legs out, putting one on either side of the toilet bowl in front of me. This pregnancy was starting to get worse. I didn’t know if I had the strength to keep up with it until I got to Mel’s. Let alone try and continue to hide the sickness from Jason. I wasn’t sure how I was going to explain this one to him without avoiding another unnecessary trip to the hospital.
“I know I don’t need to,” he said, closing the door behind him and leaning his back against the wall, our legs almost side by side. I kept my gaze forward; if I looked at him and saw those damn eyes staring at me, I didn’t know if I would be able to withhold the truth, and I truly needed to.
He cleared his throat and turned to look at me. “I want to, Cassie,” he said quietly.
“Why?” I asked curiously.
“You look afraid, and I just don’t want you to have to be scared alone okay?”
I lifted my gaze and turned so that I was face-to-face with him. “Okay,” I answered him. “I hope you know how much I appreciate it.”
“I do.” He gently tucked a piece of my loose hair behind my ear. My heart stood still. It was a small thing to do, but he had no clue about the powerful impression it just had on me. “So.” He arched his brow, peering at me with eyes that wanted answers.