by B. A. Wolfe
Nodding, I answered, “Yeah, dude. It sucks she’s this way now but I think I was pretty done, too. It was only a matter of time. She did me a favor tonight.”
“You mean Kasey did with the shake, right?” He chuckled and I followed suit.
“Yeah, that was classic.” I snatched my phone from my tux pocket and flipped it open.
Me: Prom was a disaster. Anna just dumped me. The only thing good was I got a picture like you.
I attached the photo Mom took of me in my tux and sent the text to Dan.
Ten
The next day . . .
I ROLLED OUT OF BED and rubbed the sleep from my eyes before checking my phone. It was still blank, nothing from my brother. Slightly disappointed, I tossed it back onto the nightstand. Maybe he was working. I also couldn’t wait to tell him about the pink shake that drenched Anna last night. He’d get a kick out of that. I’d call him later. I really could’ve used his words of wisdom.
I strolled to my dresser and grabbed a change of clothes. It was Sunday, no work, no doctor’s appointments. I was a free man. I smiled all the way to the shower and the whole time I got dressed. I knew exactly what I was going to do today. Sit out by my favorite tree and enjoy the spring weather.
I traipsed up the stairs, sliding my phone in my pocket, when I heard a loud noise coming from the kitchen. I paused on the last step. I thought Mom and Dad were gone? Who the hell was in my house? Leaning my ear against the door that led into the kitchen, I tried like hell to hear anything. Something rattled and then the smell of coffee poured through the seams of the door. What the hell?
I burst into the kitchen and stopped immediately at the sight of him.
“Surprise.” Dan grinned, setting his coffee mug down and coming at me with his arms open.
“No shit! You’re here!” I said, hugging him back. That explained why there was no text message. He always had tricks up his sleeve.
“Damn straight I’m here.”
I pulled away and looked at him like he was a figment of my imagination. “What? When? How did you . . .?”
He shrugged, filling up a second mug of coffee. “My brother had a shitty night and I wanted to come see him. So, I drove overnight and here I am.”
He had a deep set of bags under his eyes, but he’d never know how cool his surprising me was. “Thanks, man. This is pretty awesome.” And so needed.
He handed me a full cup. “Drink up, I got plans for us today.” Like idiots with cheesy grins, we clinked our mugs and drank every last ounce.
***
He pulled his knife out, half shocking me that he still carried it with him. But of course he would. He was still Keaton all the way through.
I stood next to him at the base of the tree. “What are you doing?”
He sucked in a deep breath and stared at the bark. “Shay dumped me last week.”
“What?” I put a hand on his shoulder.
He rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand. “Yeah. She thinks she’s gonna quit school, move to Vail, and go work at some hotel. I dunno, man.”
Now, I was really confused. A knife, the tree. But no girlfriends? “So, why are we at the tree about to carve initials into it?”
He laughed. “We’re not carving shit into the tree, we’re carving the fuckers out. I can’t stand seeing either of our initials next to those girls.” He held the knife between us. “What’d ya say?”
I grinned. “As long as I get to go first.”
Ten minutes later and a crap ton of chipped bark on the grass by our boots, we admired our work. “Job well done.” Dan patted my shoulder and flipped his knife closed, shoving it into his pocket.
“I needed this today.” Relief washed over me as I stared at the blank space. “What’s wrong with those sisters?” I asked, taking a seat with my back against the tree.
“I don’t know, man,” Dan answered, plopping down next to me, his legs crossed at the ankles, as were mine. “They’re selfish and they don’t deserve us.”
“I’m beginning to think I’ll be single forever.” I knew it wasn’t true, but it was a small town, and I already knew everyone here. I didn’t know where I’d find a nice girl. It wasn’t the end of the world, but to have someone to share the days with was important to me. I wanted what Mom and Dad had.
A piece of grass flew at my face and I snapped my focus to Dan. “The right girl’s out there, Jason.”
I threw a few pieces back at him. “I’m glad someone thinks so.”
“She is. She’ll crash into your life when you least expect it and change your world from the second you meet her. You’ll never think about Anna again.”
I’d mark the day in history. The day my brother gave me love advice. Only time would tell if it came true or not. “What about you?”
He shrugged. “When the time’s right I suppose. I’m in no hurry. I’ll wait it out. Hopefully my girl’s out there somewhere. But right now, I just wanna hang out with my brother.”
I had a response for him, but another thought had me losing my focus. “You know . . .” I said, my gaze ping-ponging from the tree to the street in front of us. “This tree sits kind of close to the road. I never really noticed until now.”
He chuckled, bringing a knee up to his chest. “That’s the shit you think about?”
It was a small town, not much else to think about. “I’m just sayin’. We might be road kill if some crazy ass isn’t paying attention.”
“Dude, we gotta get you out of this town for a few days,” he said, patting my leg with a smirk.
“Nah. This is fun, no? Enjoying this moment.”
“Moment?” He narrowed his eyes.
It was my turn to laugh. “Yeah. A moment, to remember, enjoy.”
“You kill me, Jason.” His voice trailed as the last of his sentence escaped.
I gulped and watched him look at me with a regretful expression. Ten seconds later, we both busted up laughing. Just like old times and I loved it.
“Mom know you’re back?”
His gaze lowered to the grass. “Not yet.”
Every time he was down, he pulled this shit. “Dude, Just tell her.”
“I’ll tell her later. You know she’ll brush me off anyway.” He swiped a hand roughly across his jeans as if imitating her brushing him off.
“I wish you’d just let me freaking tell her that it was me who made you leave.”
He scoffed and shook his head. “And risk them sticking their daggers in you? Hell no. I’ll take the heat.”
My shoulders lifted to my ears and my hands splayed in front of me. “But they hate you because of me. Because you won’t tell them I asked you to leave. “
“Drop it, Jason. It’s fine, okay?” His harsh tone meant he was done. I hated that he wouldn’t talk about it anymore. I nodded reluctantly. “Let’s talk about you. You thought about college at all?”
Every day. “Maybe. I dunno.”
“You can come visit me, you know? Anytime. You say the word. You can see what college is like.” His face lit up again, as if he couldn’t wait to get me to Denver.
I gulped, hard. I was petrified to find out what college was like. “I might.”
“It’s awesome. You’d love it. I can show you around campus, introduce you to some friends. They have this awesome bakery that has the best chocolate cake you’ve ever had.” He nudged my shoulder. “I even have a mailbox at the school.”
“You do?” I lifted a brow at him.
“Yep,” he said, like it was the coolest thing ever to have one.
I laughed. It wasn’t that big of a deal. We had a mailbox at home. “So what? You want me to start sending you mail? Make you feel special?”
He chuckled and stretched his leg out. “Only if you’re bored.”
Well, shit. That was a daily occurrence. “I might start putting it to good use.”
His smile tripled in size. “I’d like that.”
I laughed and made a mental note to stock up on paper and envelopes. He
was going to regret telling me he had a mailbox.
Eleven
Three years later . . .
I WAS TWENTY-ONE AND going back on dialysis.
My body had rejected Dan’s kidney, only giving me seven years of the worry-free life I
was promised. It’s rare, only a low percentage of living donor patients experience this so early in the transplant stage.
Of course it would be my luck. When life rains, it usually pours, but it’s up to you to push the clouds away and bring back the sun. So, that’s what I was trying to do, accept my new life of being back on dialysis, while I sat on the wait list for yet another kidney.
Unfortunately, no one in my family took it the way I did. Especially Dan.
I asked him to come down. I couldn’t tell him over the phone or in a letter. He sat at the kitchen table. Tears stained his cheeks as he repeatedly ran his hands through his hair.
“I’m so sorry, Jase.”
My chest squeezed tighter with each passing second of his silence. The internal battle he waged inside was evident in the way he would open his mouth and then close it. My throat slowly caved the longer I watched him. I couldn’t do this again. I’d already cried, consoled Mom who had broken down, and told Dad that I would be okay as he wiped his own tears away.
“Stop, Dan.” I folded my hands on the table and leaned into it. “This isn’t your fault.”
He lifted his head, his red eyes full of heartache pierced into mine. “This wasn’t supposed to happen. It’s a living donor organ. It’s my kidney.” He pounded his fist on his chest. “My kidney was supposed to save you. What are you going to do . . . now?” The last of his words faded out like he hated that he even asked.
I fingered my scar, knowing the useless organ that lay beneath it was the most important one my body harbored. I slid my chair around the table, closer to him, and cocked my head, making him meet my stare. “Live normally. As normal as I can. Enjoy everything around me, as small as it may be. This is the life I was dealt, and I’m not gonna let it take me down.”
Tears rolled down his cheeks as he shook his head. “It should be me in your shoes. Not you, not my little brother.” He dropped his head into his hands and cursed under his breath.
“Everybody has things they deal with. Some are good, and some are bad. This is just mine.”
“If the doctors would take it, I’d give you my other kidney. You know that right?” =
I nodded, blinking the unshed tears away. “I know,” I whispered, sniffling.
He scooted to the edge of his chair and wrapped his arms around me. “I love you, Jase.”
“I love you, too.” I buried my face in his chest and allowed myself a moment to crumple with him as I stared the prospect of death in the face for the second time in my short life.
PART TWO
“LOVING”
“If you wait for the right time for anything, it will always be too late.” - Jase
One
One year later . . .
I SAT IN MY FAVORITE SPOT on the grass in front of the abandoned library, and folded Dan’s latest letter into fourths before shoving it into my pocket. According to his scribbles, he’d be down this weekend, but about ten minutes ago that changed. He called and told me that he had to work. I should’ve known better. His visits to Keaton were few and far between. But there was no use in trying to fix things, because Dan would never let me.
Releasing a breath, I pulled out a pen from my back pocket and started the letter I owed him. In my best chicken scratch, I wrote the D, the A, and the N. The three letters were all I got out when a loud bang followed by a whoosh and constant flapping sound caused me to look up.
A car was headed straight for the tree on the other side of the street and I couldn’t move fast enough, not that trying to help was really an option. There wasn’t any time. The car crashed into the trunk and the screeching of metal pierced my eardrums. My heart pounded, my lungs pumped relentlessly, but the rest of me sat rooted to the grass. I glanced down at the letter, clutched in my shaking fist.
“Shit,” I muttered as I looked up at the steam flowing out of the engine.
I snapped out of my daze and darted from my spot, running directly over to the car. It was in bad shape, but there was no time to investigate it. I sprinted to the driver’s side and tapped on the window, not sure what to expect.
It was a girl.
Her eyes dragged from the steaming heap in front of her and met mine, slamming my heart into my chest. It was hard to focus on anything but the hazel irises staring back at me or the glimmer of water forming in the corners. Her golden hair fell over her heart-shaped face, swaying back and forth as her breathing sped up.
Beautiful.
She was breathtaking.
A streak of crimson appeared, dripping from the wound in her forehead. The frantic expression swarming her features sobered me up quickly.
“Hold still. I’m calling for help right now. You were just in an accident. Your airbag didn’t deploy, and you hit your head pretty hard. I need you to stay put,” I told her, pretending to be calm even though my heart was racing. I wasn’t sure if it was because of the accident or because this gorgeous girl was staring at me like I was her saving grace.
With a shaky hand, I fished my cell phone out and dialed 9-1-1. I told the operator what happened and our location and shoved the phone back into my pocket, returning my focus back to the girl, her hands trembling. The tears covering her face were killing me and I ached to comfort her.
“I know you’re scared, sweetheart, but help is on the way.” I wasn’t sure my words would keep her calm. I just didn’t know what else to tell her. I glanced at the banged up tree and it wasn’t two seconds later, another loud noise drew my attention away.
I twisted my neck and saw the girl furiously pounding against the window, using all of her energy to fight her way out of the car.
Damn it! She might hurt herself more if she kept that up.
“I need you to calm down. You’re going to be okay. The cops are going to help get you out.” Where in the hell were they? The town wasn’t that big. They should have been here already.
“NO! I need out of here. I need out now!” she yelled, like it wasn’t up for negotiation.
This chick was determined and between her sobbing pleas and the blood on her forehead, I was about to lose it if she didn’t get out soon, too. I pulled on the door handle, but there was no luck. It was locked. I ran to the other side, trying to hustle before she kicked her way out. But it was locked too.
Of course.
I looked down and motioned with my finger for her to unlock the door. Two beats later, the door was free and opened.
Thank God.
I exhaled a breath of relief and knelt down, crouching into the car. “Hi there,” I said in the calmest voice I could manage.
I was too stunned to say anything else. Traces of something floral wafted from the car, curling around me. The absence of glass between us magnified her beauty and took my breath away—mesmerizing hazel eyes that hadn’t left mine, blonde hair swept across her shoulders, and finally a cherry-red, heart-shaped mouth. I didn’t even have to try to smile at her, my lips curved up on their own. I couldn’t help but take the rest of her in.
She had to be a city girl. There was no way she was from around here, because I’d for sure remember a face like hers.
“Hi,” she replied, almost breathlessly, as she searched my face. Unsure of what she was looking for, I just stared back. It was impossible to look anywhere else.
Breaking our short syllable conversation and deterring my thoughts, I said, “I saw the whole thing happen from across the street. Your tire blew, and you hit the tree. You seriously need to stay calm, okay?”
“I just want out of the car. Can you please help me?” Her voice dropped even lower.
“All right.” I nodded. Way to be strong, Jason.
I told myself to shut up. There was no way I could say no to her b
egging. And I also knew that she’d be safe with me. “Let’s get you out then. I need you to climb over your console and come out this way. Can you do that for me?”
“Yeah…I-I can do that.” Her voice hitched and not hesitating a beat, I reached out for her. My lungs froze as I silently begged for her to take my hold.
She glanced down at my waiting hands and then met my stare with a relieved look, one I’d never forget. And when her warm palms pressed against mine, I wrapped my fingers around her tiny hands. I liked the way her hands fit so perfectly in mine. And the way she gripped back tightly had me wondering if she liked it too. Using my help, she swung each leg over, and then paused, releasing a heavy breath. This girl was exhausted, she didn’t need to waste any more energy. Not thinking twice, I scooped her up in my arms. I held her like she was something fragile, and I’d be lying if I said she wasn’t or that I didn’t like the way she felt in my arms.
A soft sigh slipped from her lips and I felt her relax against my chest. There was also no way I could lie and say I didn’t think it was sweet. I wondered if her name was just as sweet . . . only one way to find out.
“See, you’re out and you’re okay. What’s your name, sweetheart?” I called her that once before, and it seemed fitting for this girl in my arms.
She released a deep breath and sank further into my chest, my heartbeat accelerating. Her shy eyes peered up at me and I gulped. “It’s Cassandra. My name is Cassandra. At least I can still remember my name.”
Cassandra. I repeated her name in my head and grinned. It was music to my ears. And God, was it beautiful.
“Cassandra, that’s a great thing.” I cocked my head to get a better glimpse of her, fascinated by the way the light cast over her cheeks, making them glow. “Mine’s Jason. I’m the town’s knight in shining armor.” My lips curled up in a grin as I watched her search my face, loving how she hadn’t stopped staring at me yet.
“Thanks for the rescue, Jason.” She smiled. It was small, but it felt huge, that was until it slowly vanished and her eyelids began to close. “I have a splitting headache right now, though.”