I swing my feet back and forth while singing the lyrics to “Creep.” “I wish I was special. So fuckin’special...”—a little louder now—“…but I’m a creep!” Jeremy’s hand comes across my mouth, quieting me. I jerk my head back smacking it on the cupboard and shout, “Hey! I’m singing, Jer!”
Jeremy hands me a glass of water and a couple of Advil. I swallow the pills and let out a loud burp. He rolls his eyes, trying to hide the smile across his face.
“Do you want me to help you to bed, Darcie?” he asks.
“Ahh, Jer. That’s so sweet. Where’s Presley? She can help me. It might be weird seeing your sis in her underwear.” I laugh obnoxiously at my strange comment. God, I’m wasted.
Jeremy blushes. “She’s with Drake and I’m not going in there. If you need help, then I’ll help you.”
To Jeremy’s relief, Reggie walks around the corner, glaring at both of us. He looks sexy as hell, wearing only a pair of black basketball shorts that are slung low on his hips. I’m practically drooling as I look at the slight trail of blonde hair below his belly button and the defined V of his abdomen. His hair is loose and tousled from sleep. Oh shit. There go my hormones again. I want to rip his clothes off and suck on his…lips? I let out a small giggle followed by a hiccup from my dirty thoughts.
Jeremy’s angry as he looks over at me. “She’s fucking wasted, Reg. She drank a pint of tequila and started running her mouth to that girl she beat up at school. Everyone else bailed on me. I’m trying to get her to bed.”
Reggie rolls his eyes and shakes his head in disgust. “I’ll put her to bed.”
Relief passes over Jeremy’s face. He smiles then sprints out of the kitchen and flies down the stairs, heading for the basement. Man, I didn’t think I was that much of a pain in the ass.
Reggie walks over to me and puts his hands on either side of my thighs. My breath hitches at our closeness and flashes of last night play in my mind.
I press my forehead to his and whisper, “Always my knight in shining armor.”
“Always.” His lips stay close and I’m hoping he will crash them into mine, but he doesn’t.
“I’ve had a bad day.”
He lets out a small sigh and says, “Yeah… I know.”
Reggie slides his hands behind my butt pushing my core against his waist. Butterflies are swarming in my stomach as I wrap my legs and arms around him. I plant my face in the crook of his neck and that familiar smell of salvation engulfs me. It’s divine, a combination of soap and Reggie. Lifting me off the counter, he walks down the hall toward my bedroom. I look into his eyes where I find fierce, ocean blue pools, drowning me in desire. My body is warming with pleasure as I feel his hard muscles constrict with every movement.
Reggie kneels on the bed hovering over me. I let go of my grip and push myself to the top, lying on my pillow. He lifts one of my legs and pulls off my leather boot. It drops to the floor and he repeats with the other. He’s sitting up on his knees between my legs and my body is rushing with excitement. His hands slowly slide down the zipper of my jacket. I can’t believe this is going to happen. I don’t want anything more than to give him the innocent part of me. Now, I wish I was a little more sober.
“Sit up.,” Reggie demands, never taking his eyes off mine.
I comply. His hands skim over my shoulders, moving my jacket down and the heat from his touch is sending me over the edge. Reggie tosses my jacket to the floor and then he leans down and puts a faint kiss to the cigar burn on my left shoulder. My breath hitches from his gesture and I wish he could take all of it away. Using a gentle touch, his hands guide me to lie down. I’m panting with want. All the familiar feelings of our storage room make-out floods my body. Moving off the bed, Reggie pulls the comforter over my body then leans down and places a gentle kiss on my forehead.
“Goodnight, Darcie.”
Wait. What? He’s leaving me?
The door clicks shut. Embarrassed and rejected, I roll over onto my side and cry for the second time in twenty-four hours.
Reggie
The bar is dead for a Saturday night. Big Mike told me there’s a big drag race on Old Miller’s Road. Jeremy has been itching to get back into racing and he texted me earlier saying they were going up there to watch the race. Gavin and Michelle are handling the customer’s at the bar with no problem as I slip away from behind my post and begin making my rounds.
I spot Natasha at the jukebox. She’s swaying her hips to the music as she’s gliding her finger across the touch screen. The tight, black dress hugs her curves. She’s standing on five-inch, ice pick heels. They capture my attention and I’m suddenly pressing against my zipper. There’s no doubt about it, this woman is hot and my body is starved. It’s been a damn year since I’ve been with a woman and my hand isn’t cutting it anymore. Darcie just about killed me last night. I was not expecting any of that to happen. She was amazing. Her lips fit perfectly against mine and the eagerness of her body was telling me she was willing. Fuck! I have to get Darcie out of my mind. I need a distraction. I look again at Natasha who is slowly dancing by herself. Yes, she’ll be a fine distraction.
I walk to the jukebox and ask closely to her ear, “Anything good?”
Her shoulders jump from my presence, but she soon relaxes when I grab onto her hip. “Of course. I’m always good.”
Shit, this will be easier to close than I thought. “Well then, I’d like to see how good you claim to be.”
Natasha turns around as “Closer” by Nine Inch Nails plays through the speakers. She gives me a seductive smile and presses her tits into my chest.
I let out a deep sigh and whisper, “Appropriate.”
She follows me to my house. It’s still early and the Challenger is not in the driveway. I let out a breath of relief and decide this will be a brief encounter then I will send her on her way.
I guide Natasha up the back steps, and as soon as we hit the kitchen, we start going at it. Her lips are soft and supple, devouring me in her kiss. It’s a little sloppy for my liking, but I can work with it. I don’t plan on kissing her too much. That’s too intimate for a mindless lay.
I break loose from her. She needs to understand my expectations before we go any further.
“I want to make something clear. This isn’t a relationship. Nothing is going to come from this. Do you understand?” If she expects this to be anything more than a stress-relieving fuck, I’m kicking her ass to the curb.
“Please, Reggie. This isn’t my first rodeo and a relationship with you is the last thing I want. You’ve got way too much baggage,” she replies, slightly insulted.
“Well, as long as we understand each other.” I turn and get the bottle of Jack from the cupboard. Twisting off the cap, the aroma of whiskey engulfs my senses and my mouth begins to water. I take a big gulp and revel in the burning feeling forming inside my chest.
Natasha takes a small sip. Like every women I’ve seen down whiskey, she lets out a gagging cough. I grab the bottle from her hand, down another gulp and then lead her down the hall to my bedroom. I ignore the alarm going off in my head. I know I will end up paying for this one way or another, but my body can’t wait anymore. I need a release that only a beautiful woman can give me.
I push Natasha down on my bed and yank the straps of her dress down exposing her huge tits. Her nipples harden as I flick them with my tongue. I continue to suck and tease her hardened mounds until she lets out a moan of pleasure. Yeah, I know. Just wait baby, you’ll be screaming soon.
Wasting no time, I pull the rest of her dress down and slide off her black lace thong. She’s lying naked on my bed wearing nothing but black, high heels and stockings. My dick is so fucking hard, it’s about to explode. Acting a little eager to get it in, I yank my shirt over my head, push down my jeans and boxers, roll on a condom, and slam it into her.
“OHHH!” she yells with desire and shock. As predicted, she’s moaning, practically screaming with pleasure when I start to pick up the pace.
I keep my eyes closed. A pang of guilt washes over me as my mind begins to betray me with thoughts of Darcie. She is the only person I want to be with, but circumstances beyond our control won’t allow us. I want it to be her lying underneath me. If it were Darcie, I would never treat her as a causal lay. I would spend my time kissing her perfect lips, sucking on her breasts, and tasting her arousal. She would be worthy of so much more than what I will ever give Natasha.
Shaking my head of its thoughts, I reach behind me and put Natasha’s legs on my shoulders, bending her in half. I push myself even deeper into her and moments later, she’s convulsing from her orgasm and I soon follow. Exhausted and satisfied, I roll off Natasha and fall fast asleep.
A couple hours later, I wake to commotion coming from the kitchen. I look to my side and Natasha’s slung on half my body, practically suffocating me. Sitting up in bed, I push Natasha off me and she rolls to her side, still in a deep sleep. Darcie’s voice travels down the hallway. She’s singing and shouting. Dammit, she’s drunk. Fuck! That’s all I need is her loud mouth waking up Natasha.
I grab a pair of shorts and pull them up over my hips then make my way to the kitchen. Jeremy is trying to talk to Darcie and she’s not listening. Figures.
He explains to me she was trying to fight again and he’s trying to put her to bed. Darcie can be impossible to deal with when she’s drunk. Once he leaves, I make my way over to her. Darcie looks beautifully disheveled as she stares at me.
“Always my knight in shining armor,” she whispers, desperately close to my lips. It takes all of my restraint not to push my lips to hers.
She has no idea how deep my devotion is to her. I answer her honestly, “Always.”
Darcie will have a pretty serious hangover in the morning and I need to get her to bed. The desire to feel her close incases me. I grab her ass and push her up against my hips. Instinctively, she wraps herself around my tall frame as I make my way to her room. It feels so good when her body rubs against mine. Thoughts of Darcie’s tight body attached to mine cause me to stand at attention. I want to kiss every inch of her body. Show her how much I love her.
Her body is expressing its need to be near mine, too. I have to ignore it. I won’t allow myself to be with her that way again. Slowly, my heart breaks, knowing I will never have her.
I tuck Darcie in her covers, kiss her forehead and leave. I stand outside the door and clench my fists. What the fuck am I doing? I storm back into the kitchen. The thoughts need to escape from my head.
I grab the bottle of Jack off the counter and sit in my recliner, downing half the bottle. Drowning my growing emotions for the girl I’ve cared for over the last three years.
Drunk, I stumble my way back to my bed, wake up Natasha for round two and pass out.
Chapter 16
Darcie
Sunlight is peeking through my curtains, disturbing my sleep. My head is pounding, but my stomach is raw and aching. I sit up in bed and that’s all the movement I need before my body is ready to reject its contents. I run to the bathroom and expel the tequila. It feels like my face is hanging over the toilet for hours. I hate puking! Once the first wave has passed, I lay my head back against the wall and capture my breath.
I push myself to my feet and steady my shaky legs. Splashing cold water over my face, I rinse out my mouth, trying to rid the bad taste. I need to eat something and take some more ibuprofen before I can go back to sleep. Glancing in the mirror, I look at my appearance. That’s two nights in a row I’ve woken up hung over and feeling like a train wreck in the morning. Wow, I really look like shit. I’m still wearing my clothes from the night before, mascara is smudged under my eyes and I have a ratty bun on top of my head.
I lean over the sink, wash my face and brush my teeth and then change into a comfortable pair of shorts and a clean cami.
In the kitchen, I fill up a glass of water and down some Advil. There’s a practically empty bottle of Jack sitting on the table. I don’t remember drinking that, but to be honest, I don’t remember much of last night. Maybe the boys had an afterhours party when I went to bed.
“Bye, Darcie,” a woman’s voice singsongs as she passes by.
I spin around and Natasha is strutting through the kitchen. Her hair is disheveled and her heels are slung over her shoulder. She steps out the back door and bounces down the steps.
What the hell is she doing here? I don’t remember her at the drag race or picking her up. Why would she be here this morning?
My heart sinks to the depths of my stomach. Reggie’s comment to me in the garage yesterday, his flirting at the bar the night before last. He’s looking to get laid. It’s been a year since he’s had sex. What, so he decides to pick up the first skank that will spread her legs for him?
Deep down, I thought he really wanted to be with me. I thought once I graduated from school and turned eighteen, we would be together. I want him. I want him so bad it’s excruciating. I want him in all the ways a woman can have a man. The feeling is torturous.
Flashes of him carrying me to my room come to the forefront of my mind. She must have been here when I came home last night. Bastard! No wonder he was so eager to put me to bed. He had to hurry back to the slut who was spread eagle, waiting for him to return.
I’m beyond angry. My eyes travel to the bottle of whiskey on the table and I pick it up. The bottle trembles in my hand as rage boils inside me. Red. All I see is red. I start to dig the pad of my thumb into my scar.
Press. Dig.
Harder, Darcie.
Press. Dig.
I rub the scar with such an intense force and don’t let up until the burning of my delicate skin is red and inflamed.
My anger does not subside. I storm down the hallway and open his bedroom door. Reggie is sprawled across the mattress with only the corner of the sheet covering his naked ass. Condom wrappers are on the floor and the room smells like stale whiskey and sex. I suppress the tears forming in my eyes. I refuse to shed another tear over this man.
I take the bottle in my hand and throw it as hard as I can against the wall. Reggie springs up on the bed as shards of glass fall on top of him.
“What the fuck!” he shouts as he picks up his shorts from the floor. “Darcie, what are you doing?”
I pretend not to notice Reggie was just naked in front of me. It’s the first time I’ve seen any man naked and it shocks me a little, but I regain my anger.
“Mother fucker!” I shout.
I run back into my room and slam the door shut. I crawl under my covers and hold the tears back as long as I can, but it’s no use. They begin to soak my pillow as they pour from my eyes. He’s making me weak again and I hate him for it.
Chapter 17
Darcie
I refused to leave my bedroom all day Sunday. I can’t face him. Our relationship is at a crossroads and the sad truth is I hate the road it’s going to take. Reggie’s always been my friend, the protector of my pain, but because I allowed myself to cross that emotional line, I can only have all of him or none of him. My heart bleeds knowing the latter will be my reality.
The sun is setting in the distance and I sit in my chair, watching the sky transform. The colors on the horizon are beautiful. Brushes of purple, orange and red glaze the sky as the sun tucks itself away, welcoming the night. I know the reasons of my frustrations are foolish. He’s a grown man with needs only a woman can fulfill, but my heart still pangs with hurt, knowing I wasn’t the person he wanted.
Presley creeps into the room. She sits down on the bed and cautiously tries to decipher my mood. She’s twisting the string on her hooded sweatshirt and nervously shaking her foot.
“Presley, you’re driving me crazy. Talk,” I say, taking my eyes away from the window.
“Are you okay? I mean, you’ve been in your room all day. I heard you and Reggie yelling this morning. I just wanted to see if you were okay.” Presley looks down at her finger twisting around the string on her sweatshirt.
&n
bsp; “You heard that, huh?” She nods. “Yeah, I think I’m going to be okay.” My chest pains as my heart aches from the reality of our situation.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Honestly, that’s the last thing I want to do, especially with a girl who has no idea the depths of Reggie’s and my connection. Then, I look into her eyes. I’ve only known her a few days and I feel a bond I haven’t felt with a friend in a very long time. So I decide to spill some of my guts.
Letting out an exasperated sigh, I begin to talk. “You were right. What you said the other night at the bar. There is something special between Reggie and me. It’s impossible to explain, but from the moment he came into my life, I’ve cherished him unconditionally. At first, I looked up to him as my hero. He was my protector from everything that happened to me. He saved me,” I whisper as memories from that night flash through my mind.
“Is that where your scars come from?”
Taken back by her question, I grab the t-shirt off the floor and yank it over my head, covering my cami with the concealing fabric. I hate my scars. I’m not used to having people outside our family in the house and my discomfort fuels my irritation. I glare at her. I’m definitely not bringing up that shit with her.
She recoils from my reaction. “Sorry, I didn’t mean...”
I shake my head and get back to the conversation we were having. “Anyway…I’ve recently been looking at him differently. Like I’m really seeing him for the first time and it’s maddening.”
I turn my attention back to the window and watch the last of the fall leaves dance across the lawn. A thought of his lips against mine causes the desire living in the pit of my soul to deepen.
Presley slides to the edge of the bed and says very nonchalantly, “You’re in love with him.”
“Yeah, well, love is a two way street and right now, I’m the only one driving on it.”
“Have you tried talking to him about it? I’ve seen how he looks at you. He must have feelings for you,” she inquires.
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