by Lexi Blake
“We’ll be in four.” It was the room furthest from the dungeon. It was also the most romantic of the rooms. They each had a theme, played to some fetish, but the fourth room was simpler. It was still stocked with anything a top could want, but there was a gauzy feel that would appeal to Roni.
And to him.
“I will mark that down for when our friend comes back.” Nina gave him a jaunty salute. “Carry on.”
He did. He carried Roni right to the door and swept her inside.
“Oh, this is pretty.” She looked around as he set her on her feet.
A large four-poster bed dominated the room. Dark wood contrasted with the luxurious dove-gray cover, and big, fluffy pillows hid the restraints he could use to tie her down.
“Tell me how I made love to you the first time.” He knew he shouldn’t dwell on the past, but he wanted his memories of her. Even if they were merely stories she told him. He’d learned about himself through her, about who he used to be, and it hadn’t been all bad. He’d protected her. He’d had a heart.
He’d loved her. It was why he’d moved too soon. He should have taken his time.
“Stay with me.” Her hands were on his cheeks. “Don’t go wherever it is you go when that look hits your face. You’re right about everything. We need this time together. Let me tell you. Rebecca said it helps if I tell you what happened. I was so nervous that first time.”
“Because you were scared of me.”
She shook her head. “No. Because I was afraid I wouldn’t be enough. We had been dancing around each other. And then you kissed me for the first time and I knew I wanted to try with you. But I was still nervous when you asked me to go to Paris. I was afraid you wouldn’t really want me. But you did. You told me I was beautiful and I believed you.”
“You are beautiful. You are so fucking gorgeous to me.” He let his hands find her hair. He loved how much of it there was, that he could get wrapped up in it. He loved the color and how it shone when the sun hit it.
“I was surprised at how different you were when we were alone. Not that you were mean to me when we weren’t,” she said. Her hands moved to his shoulders. “You could be short with everyone around you.”
“But not you.”
She shook her head. “Never me. You told me once I would get you in trouble. That you had a plan and I wasn’t in it.”
He seemed to have a lot in common with his former self. “But I couldn’t stay away any more than I can now. Take off my shirt. I want you to touch me.”
Her hands went to the hem of his T-shirt and she dragged it up and over his head. The minute her hands were on his skin he breathed a sigh of relief. He realized it had been days since he relaxed. Not since the last time he’d kissed her had he felt like himself.
He placed his hand over hers, holding it to his heart.
“You kissed me for a long time. You liked your hands in my hair then, too,” she said, staring at his chest like she could find something there. Her free hand brushed over the worst of his scars. “I didn’t realize it at the time, but you took control that night. I liked it because nothing felt awkward. You showed me what you wanted. You focused on me in a way no one ever had before. It wasn’t like I’d never had sex, but it felt so different with you.” She frowned suddenly. “You’ve forgotten everything. Do you know how…”
“Roni, I’ve had sex since I was rescued.” He couldn’t lie to her again. “I wish now that I hadn’t, but I came out pretty damn desperate.”
She shook her head. “It’s okay. I can’t imagine what you went through. You should know, though, that I haven’t. My sister died shortly after you left…were taken, and then I was pregnant. I haven’t had sex in years.”
Because he’d hurt her and she’d grieved and she’d raised their baby. He kissed her forehead, tenderness welling inside him. “I’ll take care of you for as long as I can. I’ll be in your bed and in your life as much as I can. Let me show you. Take off your clothes for me and I promise you’ll know exactly how I feel about you.”
She hesitated.
He couldn’t let her insecurity take over again. If he thought she was afraid, he would back off, but that wasn’t what this was about. “Roni, we should put some boundaries into place. If things get to be too much, you tell me to slow down or to stop. I’ll do it. But unless you say those words, I expect you to obey me.”
Her nose wrinkled. “I don’t like that word.”
“Well, it’s the only time I’ll use it since any other time I’ll lay down and let you walk those pretty feet all over me. You can order me around during the day and I’ll complete every task you set for me. But when Vi’s in bed and we’re alone, you’re mine. Now take off your clothes, baby. I want to see you. It’s all I’ve been able to think about for days. Do you know what I do while Rebecca runs her millions of tests? I think about your breasts. I think about how soft they’ll be against my palm. I think about playing with your nipples. I think about finally tasting that pussy of yours, and then Rebecca yells at me because I get hard as hell.”
Her whole face lit up. This was how to handle her. She could be grim. She needed to laugh and let her light out instead of hoarding it because she was worried the world would go dark. She took a step back and there was a lovely blush to her face as she dragged the tank top over her head, revealing her breasts.
They were every bit as gorgeous as they’d been in his head. “Turn around.”
She bit her bottom lip but did as he requested, giving him her back.
He moved in behind her and let his hands slide around her, cupping her breasts and dragging her against him. It was the easiest way to get his hands on her breasts, to surround them and feel them against his palms. He loved the shudder that went through her. “Did I touch your breasts that night?”
She moved against him, not in any attempt to get away. No, she slid her body along his as though trying to tempt him. “Yes. You touched me everywhere. You were incredibly thorough.”
He could have told her she didn’t have to do a damn thing to tempt him except exist. “Tell me how it made you feel.”
Her head fell back as though she’d already surrendered completely. “Sexy. It made me feel wanted. I would go through the days working and studying, and somewhere along the way I forgot what it meant to have a life outside of work. I forgot I was anything but an employee trying to fit in. Then I would look at you and I would remember I had a body and a soul, and I wanted you to feed both of them. I knew you were the one who could. I tried to tell myself it would only be sex, but I always knew it was more.”
He could feel the way her nipples had gone rigid. He memorized the softness of her breasts. Her skin was silky and warm and her breasts filled his hands like they’d been made for each other. “I assure you it was more for me. It meant so damn much to me that even her erasing my memory couldn’t take you entirely from me. I knew you were important the minute I saw you.”
“You told me then you wanted me the minute you saw me. You said I was the one good thing that happened to you.”
“And you still are. I got lucky, Roni. I found a family here, but I haven’t truly belonged until I opened my eyes and you were there.” He let his fingers find her nipples and twisted them lightly. She gasped, a throaty sound that went straight to his cock.
“You pinched me.” She sounded so surprised he almost laughed.
He eased off but licked the shell of her ear. “And how did that make you feel?”
“Horny, Tucker. Everything is making me crazy horny, and you know it.”
He chuckled. Oh, she was fun. She would be so much fun to torture. “I’m going to do worse. Take off your pants and get on the bed. I’m going to tie you up.”
Her gaze went distinctly suspicious. “You’re going to make me wait, aren’t you? Do you know how mean that is?”
“You were always impatient.” He knew it somehow, but he didn’t pursue the memory. It was knowledge that was written on his brain. Nothing more. T
he more he allowed himself to accept these moments, the more they came to him. “The best things in life take time, and if you don’t do what I ask, we’ll have to start talking about punishment.”
Her lips curled up and he loved how relaxed she was now. “You’re going to spank me?”
“Only if you don’t mind me.”
She shoved her pajama bottoms off her hips. “Fine, but only because I’m horny and I think you’ll spend way too much time on the spanking. But later it might be fun.” Her eyes found his, a serious expression taking over. “You need this now. You took control then, but I think that was your nature. This is different. You need this to feel safe, and I want to give that to you. You’re safe with me. Tie me up. Do what you want to me. I trust you.”
She turned and walked to the bed, every movement graceful. She laid herself down in the middle of the big bed and offered up her wrists.
This was exactly what he needed, what he’d been craving since that moment when he’d awakened and realized she was here with him. He’d needed her looking up at him like he was some kind of savior, like he was worthy. She was laid out like a feast for a starving man.
“God, you’re beautiful.” He stared at her for a moment before joining her on the bed. He pulled the first restraint out from its hiding place and slid it around her wrist, securing it.
“Sneaky,” she said, watching him. She pulled against it, testing it.
He gently restrained her other hand and then eased off the bed. She might be impatient, but now that he had her here, he found he wanted to take his time. His cock was dying, but he was in control and he intended to show her exactly how focused he could be. He opened the door to the armoire, revealing how prepared Damon Knight liked his playrooms to be.
“What’s that?” Roni asked.
“You can’t play without toys,” he replied. There were impact toys of all kinds, each one cleaned and cared for by the employees who worked on the club side of Damon’s business. He wasn’t going too far out tonight. He ignored the canes and floggers and whips. They would need far more time to talk and decide what she was interested in and what she couldn’t handle. He selected the thing he knew she would enjoy.
He opened the packaging on the large feather.
“A feather?” Roni asked. “That’s kinky but not what I expected.”
He didn’t intend to do what was expected of him. Not anymore. It would take a bold approach to get out of the web he found himself caught in, but he would do it all for her. “Close your eyes and keep them closed.”
Her eyes shuttered and she seemed to relax. He climbed on the bed with her, leaving his jeans on because he didn’t trust himself to take them off. He could only be so patient.
He turned the feather over so the pointed end was placed against the notch at her neck and he started to slowly drag it down her body.
Her eyes flickered open. “That wasn’t what I was expecting.”
He bet she wasn’t expecting this either. He reached with his free hand and tweaked her nipple. “Close your eyes or I’ll get a mask for you.”
Her eyes drifted closed. He didn’t need to see her eyes to know that anticipation was building inside her. It was there in the way she bit her bottom lip, in how tight her nipples were and how her legs slid against one another restlessly. She wanted and he intended to make sure she begged before she got.
He turned the feather over and let the soft side skim her skin. “How many times did I make love to you that night?”
She gasped as the feather fluttered over one breast and then another. “Three times. No, four. You didn’t let me leave the apartment. You made me wait while you grabbed pizza and wine, and I wasn’t allowed to put my clothes on. I stayed there in bed waiting for you.”
“I was a strategic thinker,” he replied, brushing the feather over her belly. Even if he’d been a bastard in those days, he’d had a few good ideas. He wanted to keep her naked as often as possible. She didn’t need clothes around him. He brought the feather down to her pussy and let it brush over her bare skin. “You shaved. Did you do that for me?”
She squirmed slightly, holding on to the bonds that kept her in place. “I told myself it was because I needed to give a damn about grooming, but yes, I did it for you. I did it last night when I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to hold out any longer.”
He relished the idea of her running a razor over her pussy, making it soft and neat. “Did you shave for me the first time?”
She nodded. “I wanted to be sexy for you. Honestly, I’m not good at like trimming down there. Gardening is a skill I don’t have so it’s easier when I want to be pretty to shave that sucker all the way off. You seemed to like it then.”
“Oh, so I got this sweet peach in my mouth then, did I? Did you like it when I ate your pussy?”
She was breathless, her hips moving as if they remembered what had happened that night. “Yes. You could do that again. You probably should do that so you can maybe remember.”
She made him smile. “So I should eat this sweet pussy as part of my therapy. Is that what you’re saying?”
She nodded, her lips curling up. “I’m definitely saying that. I’m sure your doctors would concur.”
He moved down, shifting so he was between her legs. He could smell her arousal and it did crazy things to his cock. He needed to make sure she came because once he got inside her he wasn’t sure how long he would last. Need pounded through him, but he couldn’t give in. He wanted this time to be every bit as meaningful as the first.
God, he was competing against himself sexually, but damn if he didn’t want to win.
He teased the feather against her pussy. “That was the night we made Violet.”
He kind of wanted to do that again. He wanted to see her pregnant, hold her and take care of her while she carried their child. He wanted to be at her side, letting her break his hand when she delivered. He wanted those late nights where neither of them could sleep because their daughter had her days and nights mixed up.
“Hey, that is one hundred percent true, and you need to wear a condom because your sperm are serious. I was on the pill, Tucker. The pill. It’s a pretty damn good method of birth control, but your swimmers got through all of it. I see that look in your eyes. You’re thinking about leaving me another parting gift, but you better not put another baby up there until you can be with me.”
Her eyes came open and she stared up at him, her hands in bondage and a bit of pure crazy in her eyes, and Tucker was able to let go of the sorrow that had welled. There wasn’t a place for it here. This was their time to rediscover each other, and he knew exactly how he wanted to do that.
He set the feather aside. He had something else he could caress her with. His tongue. His fingers. His cock.
“I will remember that always. My sperm are just as insistent on finishing a mission as I am.” He lowered himself down, placing his mouth right above her core. He glanced up and she was staring down at him, all the humor having fled in favor of pure desire. He’d told her to keep her eyes closed, but he wanted her to watch this.
He very slowly dragged his tongue over her pussy, gliding over her up to her clitoris.
A deep shudder went through her and he settled in. He relearned her taste and smell and the silky feel of her thighs clamping down around his head. He loved every desperate sound she made as he licked and tongued her. He took his time, letting her wash over his every sense. His cock throbbed, and he wouldn’t be able to wait much longer. He gently thrust his fingers deep inside her pussy as he sucked on her clit. Her whole body went rigid and she cried out his name.
Tucker, not Steven. Tucker was the one who claimed her now. It was Tucker she would be with.
He got to his knees and shoved his jeans down, freeing his cock. And then remembered he had to cage that sucker again. He fished the condom out of his pocket. He’d been carrying the damn thing around for days, hoping and praying she would trust him enough to let him in her bed.
It was a request he wasn’t about to refuse. With shaking hands, he managed to get the condom on, tossing the wrapper to the side. “Yes, but then we slow down. There’s a shower behind that door and I’m going to take you there and lick every inch of your body clean before I get you dirty again.”
“And I’m going to get you out of those jeans and get my mouth on your cock,” she promised with the sweetest smile. “You didn’t let me do that last time. I think you should order me to suck your cock, Sir.”
He groaned because if she kept talking, he would come before he even had a chance to get inside her. “You’ve got topping from the bottom down, but I think you’re also a wise woman so I might have to follow your advice. God, you’re beautiful.”
She spread her legs and looked like a sex goddess lying there. She was in bondage, but she didn’t look like a woman who wasn’t in control. She was powerful and she knew exactly what she wanted.
Him.
Nothing in all of his life had ever made him feel the way that look in her eyes did.
He pressed himself against her pussy and vowed to do anything he had to do to get back to her.
Her legs wrapped around him and he thrust deep. She held on to the bindings, but her eyes were on him. He stilled inside her, savoring the sensation of all that heat surrounding him. He lowered himself on top of her, finding her lips and kissing her with need, the need to brand her while he bound himself to her, to possess and be possessed. To belong to her.