by Lisa Edward
“I miss the goose bumps you give me when your hot breath tickles my neck and you nuzzle my hair.” Tears spilled over my lashes, but I kept talking. “I miss all the loving, thoughtful words you used to say to me—the way you always knew exactly the right thing to say to make me feel better, or to give me strength,” I croaked. “I miss what you used to do with your lips and your tongue, and how it made me feel. I miss your mouth and everything about it.”
Cole’s face leaned into my palm. His eyes closed for a moment as his hand slowly ran up my arm to join my hand on his cheek.
“Do you remember in Paris when you asked why I wouldn’t kiss you?”
He nodded gently, his eyes slowly opening.
“I didn’t want to kiss you because I knew once I did, I would never want to stop.”
The rise and fall of his chest was increasing in pace.
“I don’t want to stop, for the rest of my life. I don’t want to stop kissing you, Cole.” I reached out, taking his other hand in mine. “I know you don’t love me anymore, Cole.”
“You don’t know anything, Tara,” he said, huskily. “You don’t know that I feel like I’ve had my heart ripped out of my chest, that I can’t breathe. I go from feeling numb to so much pain, and I don’t know which is worse—to not feel, or to feel so much it hurts.”
I could see the pain in his eyes, and I hated that I had put it there.
“Can you ever forgive me?” I pleaded.
He shook his head. “Baby, I forgave you the day you came home. I knew you’d slept with Riley.” He swallowed hard, as if what he had just said had put a lump in his throat. “When you were sitting in the shower, crying your eyes out, I made the decision then and there to forgive and forget, because I would rather do that than live without you.”
I didn’t understand. If he forgave me, then why did he leave me?
He brushed a stray hair behind my ear. “I don’t know what to do. I can’t keep going on like this—I don’t want to go on without you.”
“I’m so sorry, Cole, this is all my fault. I screwed up. I turned to Riley when I thought I had lost you. I was lonely and miserable and he needed me … I guess we needed each other.”
“But that’s just it, Tara, it’s not your fault, it’s mine. I practically tied a bow around you and delivered you into his bed,” he said, his voice so full of pain. “I should never have let you walk out the door that night. I should have fought for you, I should have told my mother to go to hell, but instead I did what I always do. I let her control my life, like I was that pathetic child again. I didn’t give you any choice.”
“I don’t want to be with him,” I said plainly. “If we can’t be together, I’ll raise Tori on my own.”
His hand went to the nape of my neck. His eyes dropped to my mouth. I wanted so much to lean forward and kiss those lips, but I didn’t dare.
“Would you really?”
I nodded. “What you said on the beach, that it’s always been Riley, that’s not true. It has always been you, Cole.”
“I’m scared, Tara,” he whispered. “How can I forget what happened when Tori is a constant reminder? I don’t want to turn into my mother and resent Tori when none of this is her fault.”
“Do you love her?” I asked simply.
He sighed. “Almost as much as I love you.”
“You’re her dad, Cole, and the silver lining in all this is that you are nothing like your mother. You don’t have one drop of that woman’s spiteful, conniving blood in your veins. You will never be like her. You’re loving and caring.” I gave him a half-smile. “You could never show her anything but love.”
Cole’s head leaned forward, his breath fanning my cheek. He was so close, so tempting. I stepped toward him, raising my face, softly kissing his jaw.
A soft moan rumbled in his throat as his fingers laced with mine. “You’re still wearing your ring,” he whispered into my neck.
“Mmm.” I closed my eyes, pressing my body to his broad chest. “I can’t bear to be without it,” I murmured, totally swept away by the heat radiating through my body as his lips skimmed my shoulder.
“Good. I don’t want you to take it off,” he said huskily in my ear.
My breath caught in my throat. “What does that mean?” I asked, so full of hope.
His lips brushed against mine. “It means I’m still yours. I will always be yours.”
“Do you still want to marry me?” I looked up to meet his dark emerald eyes.
“Are you proposing?” he said, the corner of his mouth twitching.
“If you want me to get down on one knee, I will,” I told him, stepping back.
His arm hooked around me, pulling me close. “That won’t be necessary.”
Before I could catch my breath, his mouth was on mine, the hand at the nape of my neck holding me in place. I wanted to get closer. I needed to get closer. My arms wrapped around his shoulders as our bodies melded together. The arm around my waist pulled tight, lifting my feet from the floor as the kiss deepened, all the misery of the last ten days drifting away now that I was back in Cole’s arms.
The door opened behind us, the room filling with the sound of Tori crying.
“Sorry to interrupt,” Jay said apologetically, “but ah—” He was holding Tori at arm’s length, “—she stinks.”
“Don’t hold her like that,” Cole chastised, holding out his hands to take her.
Tears stung my eyes again as I watched Cole with Tori, his face lighting up. Tori stopped crying when she heard Cole’s voice, her little eyes opening wide.
“Hey, beautiful girl. Did Uncle Jay say you stink?” He smiled lovingly at her. “You don’t stink, do you?” Cole laid her on the couch that was in the corner of the recording studio, and went to work changing her like it was second nature. “Don’t you worry, little princess, Daddy will look after you.”
Jay’s eyes darted between Cole and me. “So what does this mean?”
I didn’t want to presume anything, but I hoped more than anything that it meant Cole could accept Tori, and we could be together as a family again.
“It means,” Cole said, bouncing Tori in his arms as he sat on the couch, “that Tara is the love of my life, and Tori is my daughter.” He looked over at me with a grin on his face. “Isn’t that right, babe?”
Sitting beside Cole, I rested my head on his shoulder. “So you can accept Tori as your own, even though you know the truth?”
“I never wanted to find out,” he said sadly. “I always knew there was a chance that she wasn’t mine, but I didn’t want to know.”
Frowning, I looked up as Cole covered Tori’s hand with kisses. “So why did you get the paternity test?”
“I didn’t, my mum had it arranged. It’s common practice before changing a will in our family. All my parents’ estate should go to my children, just like Pops’ came to me.”
Now I was really confused.
“I know your DNA is on file now, but where did she get Tori’s to run the comparison? She’s never even seen Tori.”
Cole stopped kissing Tori’s little fingers. “I don’t know, I never thought about that. I was too devastated when she handed me the results, so I never questioned it.”
I raised my eyebrows questioningly at Cole.
“No … she wouldn’t have. Even she’s not that cruel.” But the look on his face told me he knew that she was capable of anything.
I WAS hot, too hot.
Cole was cuddled hard against me, his arms wrapped tightly around my waist, his face buried in my chest. I chuckled to myself. It was a wonder he hadn’t suffocated during the night, but he still seemed to be breathing as my movement made him stir.
“Stay,” he mumbled into my cleavage. “You make a comfy pillow.”
“And you make a great hot water bottle.” I brushed his damp hair from his brow. “I need to put the air-conditioning on.”
Tip-toeing past Tori’s room, I stuck my head in to check on her. She was still fast
asleep, having kicked her sheet off sometime during the night, so I kept going to the kitchen to get a glass of water and turn on the cooling.
My phone was sitting on the kitchen bench, plugged into the charger with the red light flashing, so I listened to the message.
Dr Vincent had called to advise she’d put a rush on Tori’s paternity test and the results were in. The anti-climax was overwhelming, but she wanted me to go in to her office as soon as I could make an appointment.
“Doc called,” I told Cole, handing him a cool drink. “She has the test results back. I’ll go in sometime next week to see her.”
“Let’s go today. I’ll come too.”
I smiled, sliding back in between the sheets. “You don’t need to come, babe.”
“I know.” He smiled, his hand finding its way down my stomach and under the sheet. “I want to.”
I was so pleased that he decided to present a united front and come with me. It wouldn’t be a surprise if she told us his DNA didn’t match, but he wanted to show that it didn’t matter. In our minds and hearts, he was Tori’s dad, regardless of what the paternity test said.
“So, I have your results back in,” Dr Vincent told us as we sat in her office. “But I don’t think you need me to tell you. Just look at those eyes,” she cooed, looking from Tori to Cole. “She has your eyes.”
Cole’s eyes narrowed. “What do you mean, she has my eyes?”
Dr Vincent smiled. “What I mean is, I can already see that they’re turning green. She may look like Tara, but the eyes are unmistakably yours.”
Cole puffed out a breath. “Riley has blue eyes, right?” he asked me.
I nodded. “Yep, bright blue.” Tears were prickling my eyes. “So Cole is definitely her dad?”
Dr Vincent pushed the test result over her desk towards us, turning it so we could read it. “Undoubtedly Cole’s. We followed the collection procedure required. There’s no question.”
Cole looked as if he’d been hit with a sledgehammer. “She is mine,” he said under his breath, the realisation sinking in. His eyes welled with tears of joy as he looked at his precious little girl, but the beaming smile began to fade as he looked into my eyes. “My mother …” he said through gritted teeth. He shook his head, his jaw firmly set. “We need to pay her a visit.”
We hardly spoke in the car on the way to Cole’s parents’ house, but I could see from the clenching of his jaw that he was absolutely livid.
“Do you want me to come in with you?” I asked, secretly hoping he’d say no. I’d had enough encounters with that woman to last me a lifetime, but if Cole wanted me there, I would support him one hundred per cent.
“This is as much about you as it is Tori and me. She was trying to break us up.”
My focus had been on Cole and Tori, so I hadn’t thought about the fact that she’d lied to Cole, probably in the hope that he would leave me too.
“Bitch!” I muttered, and then gave him a sly grin. “Let’s get her.”
Cole carried Tori to the door as I followed behind. He rang the bell then stepped back, taking the opportunity to calm his nerves with a deep breath. He looked over at me as I fidgeted nervously, but the determination on his face put me at ease. He wouldn’t cower down to her ever again; this had been the last straw.
Lucinda opened the door herself, dressed head to toe in Chanel. I hadn’t expected it; I’d expected to be greeted by the housekeeper and ushered into the sitting room. She glared at the three of us, probably not expecting to ever see us together on her doorstep.
Before she had a chance to close the door in our faces, Cole barged into the entry, and I scurried closely behind.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, her eyes fixed squarely on me, one perfectly-groomed eyebrow cocked.
“Your manipulation didn’t work this time, Lucinda. You didn’t break us up; it only made us stronger.”
She didn’t flinch. There was no sign of guilt or remorse on her face, only pure disdain.
Cole stepped forward. “Take a good look at this little girl, Mother, because it’s the last time you’ll ever see her face.”
“But … she’s not yours, Victor.”
“She has my eyes. She is mine.”
“You’re just seeing what you want to see, clutching at straws.”
“No, what I’m clutching is a legitimate paternity test.” He ripped the folded paper from his back pocket. “One that wasn’t paid for to go the way you wanted it to.”
She gasped, and I smirked. She would never have suspected that we would have our own test done.
“How much did it cost you to try to take my daughter away from me?” Cole bellowed, making Tori jump. He patted her back, kissing her head to settle her again.
“Less than it cost me to falsify your birth certificate. I should have done with you what I tried to do with her. Instead of adding my name to your birth certificate, I should have removed your father’s; it would have been a lot cheaper.”
I couldn’t believe what she was openly saying, but she was so hell-bent on hurting Cole that she didn’t hear Victor coming down the stairs quietly behind her.
“You would have been raised by that whore in Italy, living in poverty, and I would never have to be reminded that you even existed.”
Victor’s mouth opened in shock as he heard the vindictive things coming out of his wife’s mouth.
“Lucinda!” he exclaimed, reaching the bottom of the stairs. “How can you say that to our son?”
She spun on him. “He’s not my son,” she spat, “he never has been. He’s yours, with that whore!”
Victor’s hand went to his mouth, his eyes wide.
“So now you know, Dad,” Cole said quietly, “She never wanted me, and she’s let me know every day that I’ve ruined her life.”
Cole took a few steps towards the door before turning. “Just so we’re clear, Tori is Michaels’ blood, whether you like it or not. So this is what’s going to happen.” He stared his mother down and for the first time since I’d met her, she looked wary of Cole. “You will recognise her as the heir to your estate, and make a public announcement regarding her birth.” He gripped my hand. “And you will acknowledge my engagement to Tara, and tell anyone who will listen how happy you are for us.”
I could see her chest heaving.
“But you will not be welcome in our home, nor will you play any part in Tori’s life.”
I had to divert my eyes. I was so proud of him, but I didn’t think it was appropriate to break into a round of applause.
“Is that clear, Mother?”
She nodded indignantly.
“Did you know about this, Dad?” Cole asked, his voice cracking.
“No, of course not. I was just told that Tori wasn’t yours so had no right to our estate.”
“She is mine.” He looked at me. “She’s ours.”
Victor glared at Lucinda. “How could you do something like this?” His body seemed to grow, the way Cole’s did when he was angry. “To try to deprive my granddaughter of her inheritance, to deprive me of my own flesh and blood?” He towered over his wife, and she shrunk under the weight of his stare. “It’s unforgivable, Lucinda, completely unforgivable.”
He came to where we were standing, his hand gently running over Tori’s head. “She’s beautiful.”
Cole’s stance relaxed. “She looks like Tara, but with my eyes.”
Victor smiled. “She has our eyes. I can see all the generations in those eyes.” He looked at me hesitantly, then back to Cole. “Can I hold my granddaughter?”
Cole smiled, and carefully handed Tori to Victor. “She’s named after us too, Dad.”
“That’s because she’s part of our family, son.”
It was Sunday night and the bar was closed, so we invited everyone over to our apartment to share the exciting news. Not only were Cole and I back together and stronger than ever, but Tori was Cole’s. We were a family again.
Kelli was apprehensive when
I invited her over, and it took a few minutes of coaxing before she explained why.
“Riley’s here. He’s crashing on the couch for a few days.” She paused, waiting for me to comment.
“Hang on.” I covered the phone and looked over at Cole. He was deep in thought, fine-tuning a song he’d been working on. “Riley’s in town, staying at Kell’s, so …” I shrugged at him.
He shook his head. “No fucking way, Tara. If he comes anywhere near you, I’ll kill him.”
“That’s what I thought,” I said to Cole before removing my hand from the phone. “Kell? Sorry, that would be a big no-way-in-hell-is-he-stepping-foot-in-this-apartment.”
I could hear the smile in her voice. “That’s what I thought. He’ll be here for two more nights, so if you have any unresolved issues you know where to find him.”
“I know and I’ll make sure I come over.” Even though we now knew that Tori was Cole’s, I still wanted Riley to meet her—if he wanted to, of course.
We showered and changed, which took longer than anticipated. I’d planned on jumping in and out quickly, but Cole decided to join me, which always led to steamy sex under the water. There were many things that pushed Cole’s buttons, and sex in the shower was one of them. As he lathered up his hands and ran them over my breasts, I could see the look in his eyes change as his pupils darkened.
We kissed as the water ran over our faces and into our mouths, and he tugged on my bottom lip with his teeth. His hand slid down my body as he pushed up against me, letting me know exactly where his mind was at.
“From the front, or from behind?” he growled in my ear. But I didn’t have time to answer before he lifted me and backed me against the tiles.
“I guess it’s front,” I breathed as he positioned himself and pushed inside me, making me gasp.
Strong fingers grasped my ass as he held me in place, thrusting into me as deep as he could go. But he pulled out, groaning at the loss of contact, before kissing and licking his way down my neck, to my chest and down my stomach. He still had me lifted from the floor of the shower, his biceps bulging from holding me up, but it didn’t seem to bother him as he dropped to his knees, wrapping my thighs over his shoulders.