The drawer opens and he takes out a piece of gum. His minty crutch. After a few chews Henrik visibly relaxes. What is in that gum? Maybe I need some. I reach into the drawer to pull out a piece, unwrap it, and pop it in my mouth. After a few bites, I can safely say that it is not heroin infused gum like I originally thought, but wintergreen. Well, at least it's good to know he isn't addicted to drugs and hiding it through his strange gum consumption.
Henrik slams the drawer and turns to me, stretching out his hand to shake.
"Well, it's been fun. Thanks for contributing to the ruin of my life. At least the sex was good."
What the fuck?
"Excuse me? Get your fucking hand away from me!" I slap it aside and he rolls his eyes.
"That's it. You said it yourself; we shouldn't see each other. What’s important here are our jobs, so we have to look at this like business partners. In business, we shake on it and talk about the good and bad, without getting emotionally involved. You should know this Ms. Drake if you want to have a chance at ever being an executive in a company."
He is smirking while folding his arms over his chest.
"You are a dick, you know that? I'm not happy that all this happened. It's not like I want to end this Henrik."
“Ah, that’s Mr. Payne to you, Ms. Drake.” There it is. He's back. The boss I first met all those months ago. The cold, unfeeling man who would rather spend the night researching historical data on marketing strategies and consumer sales growth patterns than having a normal adult conversation.
I don't like this Henrik. This Henrik can go to hell.
"Fuck you Mr. Payne!"
I turn and walk out his office door and straight for the elevators, hoping I never see that Henrik ever again. Once the lift doors close, my burning face scrunches as I try to push the tears back. Despite my anger, his words he spoke only a half hour ago keep floating around in my mind, “I love you.” I shake my head trying to make them disappear but it only worsens. The haunting image of his disappointed eyes when I didn’t respond to him after he proclaimed his love causes my heart to crack as tears begin to stream down my cheeks.
How can he love me and then so easily treat me like nothing, like I’m only his assistant when we are discovered? For that moment, when he said he loved me, I was shocked. I needed to know if he meant those words and it wasn’t just hormones raging through his body from sex. I wanted to talk to him about our feelings for each other afterward, preferably after work when we would have the privacy and levelheadedness we needed.
Only that never happened.
The doors swing open and I stomp my feet over the smooth beige tile floor of the lobby and push through the glass front door onto the street. I don’t look back as I make my way to the El train to head home. I wanted to stay with the Henrik who asked me about the movie I watched while making fun of my cake consumption, but he is fleeting. This cold, demanding Henrik I am quite happy to leave behind.
*****
Okay, so I really tried to leave Henrik back at Mimir, but it’s extremely hard not to think about him. He consumed my head last night even as I indulged at the best bakery in Chicago, Got Cake. I replayed yesterday over and over again. I felt guilty for leaving him after he professed his love while shoving cream cheese frosted red velvet cake in my mouth. Then I did a one eighty and thought, “So what if I left? Henrik has done it to me so many times, especially after sex. It's about time he got a taste of his own medicine.” Needless to say, I spattered crumbs everywhere. It wasn’t pretty.
This man has walked out on me right after sex multiple times; he’s toyed with my emotions and vagina as if he’s a five-year-old and I’m his favorite racecar. Not only that, but he lied to me. L-I-E-D! Lied to ME! Not telling me that the Mimir brothers never found out about the time Evaleen walked in on us or how I got fired from RT Mitchell is basically lying to me. Sure, he did it to help get my job back and save me major embarrassment from my co-workers and higher ups, but that’s not the point. The point is he lied.
So it isn't the worst thing he could do to me. And he did admit that he loved me, for which I didn't respond. You see the cycle I keep creating for myself?
I should have said something now that I think more about it, not left him hanging like that. Shit, I'm terrible aren't I? Here I am, riding up the elevator with an empty box I managed to snag from my favorite bakery to clear out my desk, and this is the moment I realize what a terrible shit I really am? It took me a full day to come to this conclusion? I need cake.
"Cake, that's the answer to everything isn't it Morgana?" My Brain smirks at me.
"I have had just about enough out of you. Where were you yesterday when I really needed you, Brain? Nowhere! How convenient it is that my love life and my job are ruined and NOW you decide to return? Thanks, thanks a lot!
The door dings as the elevator opens to let on a man and woman. They smile at me, but continue their conversation in hushed tones so I can't hear them as the lift begins to rise again.
"I have warned you many a time Morgana that sleeping with your boss would not end well, but you never listen to me. Now you have nothing. The least I can do is help you rebuild. Maybe Radio Shack is hiring." Brain rubs her squiggly chin in contemplation.
"You’re joking, right? I am not working at Radio Shack. No offense to them, I am sure it's a great place, but I was just the assistant to the Vice President of a multi-billion dollar company. I am not going to work for minimum wage at any place that has the word ‘shack’ in the title," I whisper yell, turning my head toward the wall as not to arouse suspicion from my elevator companions. I glance back to see they are still in the throes of their conversation.
"Oh, well, I didn't realize you have gone all high and mighty on me. If that's the case, we really have to buckle down once we get home and figure out what is going to happen. Because, in the past almost five months, you have gotten yourself fired not once, not twice, but three times -- twice from the same company -- for having sex. While that is certainly impressive, I just don't know how we can spin that in an interview."
I close my eyes and take a deep breath before I bellow out, "Fuck you Brain!"
I open my eyes when I hear the elevator open and see the couple staring at me slack jawed before they scramble out whispering and pointing at me as they go. Now there are two more people I can add to the list who think I am crazy.
After the door closes a moment later, the elevator lands on my floor. I push my shoulders back and pray that I don't run into anyone as I clear out my desk, especially the Mimir brothers. I just want to get my stuff and go. I turn the corner and see my desk just as the smell assaults me. The Brooks Bomb. How could I forget?
I guess this is my punishment for letting my vagina make decisions for me.
"It was worth it Morgana. So worth it," Vagina flaps her lips at me.
"For you maybe Vagina, but you don't have a nose. I am the one who has to smell this shit...literally!"
"Oh my god; Drake are you still talking to your body parts? I thought for sure if you finally got laid, you would stop doing that. I guess Payne just isn't that good in the sack. Figures."
I turn my head to see Evaleen walking up behind me. Ugh, one of the last people I wanted to see today. She called me all day yesterday and most of this morning. Of course I have been ignoring her calls, because who in their right mind wants to hear from their friend, and more importantly HR Manager, that they are being fired for getting busy with their boss on office furniture during business hours.
I cringe and shuffle off to my desk to place the box down.
"I'm nervous Evaleen. It's not like I really want to be here. Everyone has a nervous tick. Some people fidget, others eat copious amounts of food; I talk to my body parts. It’s soothing, it helps me figure things out. You should try it sometime."
Looking up, I see her hold back a laugh and shake her head. "Uh, no thanks. I think I will stick with normal things like twirling my hair or biting my lip."
I
lean back on my desk and look over at the bathroom door hoping the stench dissipates quickly.
"You don't do any of those things Evaleen."
Evaleen backs up so she is standing in Henrik's doorway, most likely to avoid the aroma around us, while folding her arms over her chest.
"I know. That's because I am never nervous."
I lift a brow while pursing my lips. "Never? Really?"
She clears her throat and her eyes fall to the floor. "Well, I'm not here to talk about being nervous, I am here to talk about yesterday."
Damn, I thought I had successfully distracted her. I might as well get this over with. Pushing myself off the desk, I bring the box to the other side of my desk and start to clear out the drawers.
"Let me just clear out my desk and then I can come over to your office to fill out any paperwork you need from me. It should only take me a few minutes."
The box is starting to get heavy as I place items in it from the drawers, so I move it on to the desk and crouch down to dig in the bottom drawer. I can hear Evaleen walk up beside me, but continue my focus on the large object that is stuck at the back of the drawer. I keep yanking at it, wondering what I put back there that would be stuck.
"Okay, I'll be in my office. We already have a copy of your social security card and license for the Executive Development paperwork, so I will just need you to sign some things. And, of course there will be booklets for you to take home to read."
I give one more firm yank and the object breaks free, as I fall on my ass. In a daze, I look up to see Evaleen smirking at me.
"What? Executive Development paperwork? I don't understand." I watch as her eyes fall to what is in my hand and widen in surprise.
"Didn't you take that home? Don't tell me you used that in the office Drake? When I gave it to you for your birthday I thought you would take it home."
I look at my hand to see a slightly crinkled box of what looks like a cupcake, but is in fact a cupcake vibrator.
"Oh, yeah. I mean no! No, I haven't used it yet. I forgot about it."
I scramble to my feet and place the vibrator in the box. Shaking my head, I turn back to Evaleen to focus on what she said before. "No one cares about the vibrator. You brought up the program. Why would I be filling out paperwork for the program?"
My hands go to my hips after pushing my hair out of my face with a frustrated huff.
"I care about that vibrator Drake. Remind me never to buy you anything nice from now on if that's what you think of my gifts." Evaleen lifts the crinkled box and tries to open it.
I wave my hands in the air in front of us and close my eyes while taking a deep breath. After a moment, I open them, feeling a little calmer than before.
"I don't mean I don't care about the gift. I like the gift. I can’t wait to use the gift. It was very thoughtful, thank you. I am just a little more concerned right now about the Executive Development Program paperwork you talked about earlier. Why would I need to fill that out if I’m about to be fired?"
Evaleen freezes and then places the box down before turning to face me. Her perplexed expression makes me start to wonder if yesterday even happened.
"Why would you be fired Drake? Because you had sex with your boss? Oh, no...no...no." She giggles while shaking her head.
Okay…
Evaleen is now sifting through the box I brought and after a minute of silence looks up at me. She’s crinkling her brow and narrowing her eyes. "Why is this a surprise Drake?"
I do a quick headshake as my eyes dart around the area wondering if this is some really late April Fools’ joke I am the butt of.
"Are you kidding me? I had sex with my boss." I grab her hand and drag her into Henrik's office, which is now bare. My breath evaporates in shock as I absorb the bare walls, desk, and anything Henrik ever touched. Almost absentmindedly, I look to where Planty used to be, my eye drawn to the slightly discolored carpet from the water stain.
Hearing Evaleen groan snaps me back from thinking about an old dead plant and a former boss. We stop beside the large desk and I point as if I am giving her a tour. "This is where Henrik and I had sex."
Refusing to let go of her hand, I guide us back to the door and point again. "And this is where you, Mr. Ethan Mimir, and Mr. Jacob Mimir walked in on us."
Finally I let go and turn to face her. "Now you tell me, is that not a case for someone to get fired? Because most people would assume they are fired after that."
Evaleen chuckles as she places her hands on my arms giving me that pity look she does so well when she knows the truth. The awful truth.
"Oh Drake, yeah you are right. Jacob wanted to fire you and Payne. I fought for you and Ethan fought for Payne. Why he fought for him, I don't know, but they are friends so there you go. The Mimir brothers and I were discussing your future with this company when Payne burst into my office not long after we walked in on you two. That's when Payne told us that he specified to you that your job, especially your chances at the Executive Development Program, depended on you two getting together sexually."
Evaleen sneered as she said the final words. I shook my head. "No, that's simply not true." I may be mad at Henrik, but I am not going along with a lie, especially if it paints him as a slimy boss.
"I know Drake. You understand my feelings for Payne are very much the opposite of your feelings for him, but even I was telling him not to do that. I actually..." Evaleen put the back of her hand on her forehead and for a moment I thought she was about to faint, she took a deep breath and leaned against the bare walls for support. "I told Mr. Jacob Mimir that Payne has been...oh God...wow, this is harder than I thought. I am actually having a harder time telling you than I did Mr. Mimir."
I grab her arms and give her a slight shake. "What? What did you tell him?"
"Hey, watch it Drake. Don't make me regret this. Look, I told Mr. Mimir that I knew for a fact that what Payne was saying wasn't true. That he was a good...ugh...good boss." She visibly shuttered and dry heaved after saying it.
I stood there staring at Evaleen with my mouth wide open. I'm in shock that Evaleen would stick up for Henrik, and that Henrik would say any of this to the Mimir brothers to begin with. Why would he lie about that? Why would he lie about forcing me to have sex with him? I don't understand any of this. Evaleen can tell I am lost, so she wraps her arm around my shoulder as she guides me out of Henrik’s old office and toward hers.
"I know this is a lot to take in. That's why I have been trying to call you. I even tried to get a hold of Dixon, but she was with some guy and didn't know where you were."
"Oh, yeah. I went to my favorite bakery, Got Cake. It's one of those all night bakeries." I can hear the defeat in my voice.
Evaleen sits me at her desk as she heads over to her side and starts digging through drawers.
"But I still don't understand how I am signing paperwork for the program?" I look at her, still in a daze.
"Reluctantly, Mr. Mimir fired Payne, but not before Payne tried to claim your idea about the small distributors overseas to solve our problem there. I guess he thought he could keep his job if he solved the company's problem. Of course, he didn't count on you having told me about it Monday night. That's when things got ugly." Evaleen's lips curl as she rubs her hands together in a devilish manner.
"That mother fucker! I can't believe he tried to steal my idea. I trusted him. Here I thought I was the asshole in all this, wanting to break up to salvage our jobs. God, I am a fool."
I sit back in the chair and sigh. How could he do this? That’s not like Henrik at all. He may be an asshole but he would never steal an idea to save himself or steal an idea in general. Maybe I don’t know him like I thought. We have only known each other for five months. With all he has confessed to me in London, how I witnessed him laugh more, and the way he touched me, I felt more connected with Henrik than all my years together with Trevor Trance.
Evaleen walks over with papers in her hands. She rubs my back while shoving the paperwor
k in my lap.
"It's all over Drake. You never have to see that Payne in the Ass again. More importantly, I never have to see him again either. Now, you can sit back, relax, fill out some HR paperwork, and get packed for your six weeks in New York."
My eyes widen as I stare up at her.
"New York?" I gasp.
"Yeah, that's where the program takes place. It used to be here, but Mimir opened the New York office a few years ago and thought it would be better suited there."
Evaleen gets up and walks over to a filing cabinet. She opens up a drawer and removes several large manuals. Returning, she plops them in my lap, causing me to groan.
"Take this home, fill it out, and read up on everything. Have the paperwork back by tomorrow so I can arrange the flight for Saturday. You will have your own apartment that you will be sharing with another EDPS for six weeks."
My head is spinning from all the information. I am thankful that I have thirty pounds of books in my lap holding me in place or I would have face planted the floor by now.
Chapter 2
Morgana's Problem: Her Move
"You are dying aren't you? Oh God, my baby girl is leaving us. I knew this would happen one day, I just thought I would be gone before you. Why God? You are so young. And look at your figure! What man is going to want to squeeze your ample breasts when you’re dead? Perverts that’s who! You are only going to attract perverts now Morgana! My baby girl doomed to be groped by perverts," Mom wails as her arms wrap around my head at the dinner table.
I can barely breathe let alone see, as I hear gasps and a few “no's” being thrown around the small dining room. Pushing my mom's arms away from me and catching my breath, I see my father's strong lip start to tremble. His eyes become glassy as he mouths the words, 'I love you,' from the other side of the table. My brother is actually sobbing with his head in his hands, while his 'girlfriend of the month' with her short brown tight curls looks around the room petrified.
Cake Love: All Things Payne Page 11