by Hope Ford
I feel like such a third wheel as I sit here and wonder how soon before I can get up and leave without being rude.
The waitress comes over, ignoring Blair and me and instead looking straight at Austin. I just shake my head, thinking about how some things never change. I get the waitress’ attention. “I’d like to order a round of drinks on me, whatever you got on draft will be fine.”
She nods her head, walking away, and then I smile at Blair. “This way we can celebrate me finally getting to meet Austin’s gorgeous girlfriend.”
Finally, I think I’ve won Blair over, and she starts to tell the story of how she and Austin met. I listen intently, or at least try to. But I can’t help but feel sorry for her. I look between Austin and Blair and know that this is just another notch on his bedpost. He doesn’t do serious. But the only reason I don’t get too sympathetic toward her is because I know Austin. By now, he’s already told her that he doesn’t commit and doesn’t want a relationship. Women just don’t seem to get it or believe it though. They always think they’re going to be the one that changes his mind. But I can tell it’s not going to happen… not with Blair.
Austin cuts in when Blair’s story starts to get too personal. He shifts Blair to his other leg and puts her on the chair on the other side of him and then leans toward me. “How are you doing? You worried me when you didn’t text me back yesterday.”
My face flushes with guilt. He still doesn’t know that I’ve been here three days already, pretty much avoiding him. I don’t want to get into details with Blair staring me down, though. “It was just a hard situation I needed to get away from.”
The waitress brings our drinks back and I act as if I’m preoccupied with that. I take a big swig, automatically remembering how the drinks are watered down, but it still feels like home to me anyway.
Austin reaches his hand out and I know he’s going to put it over mine. He’s done it a thousand times in the past, but for some reason this time, I pull back. I don’t know why I do, and I can tell he doesn’t like it, but it doesn’t stop him or sway him from what he wants to talk about. “What happened?”
Instead of answering him, I look at Blair and she’s looking down at her shirt, opening buttons on her already low cut blouse and it’s clear that she’s not happy about me being here. When she sees me looking at her, her hand slides across Austin’s chest and down his stomach, disappearing under the table.
I take another swig of my beer and avert my eyes. She’s going to give him a hand job right here. I’m done.
I stand up, pulling money from my purse and tossing it onto the table. “I’m going to go, Austin, so you and Blair can finish your date.”
I look between his face and Blair’s disappearing hand and back again. It’s like he didn’t even notice that she’s wanting to give him a—well, you know—right here. But when he sees me staring, he holds on to Blair’s arm and removes it before standing up. “You don’t have to go.”
“Tomorrow. We can get together tomorrow,” I assure him, already walking toward the door.
“We can all go. I’ll take Blair home and then we can talk.”
As soon as the words leave his mouth, Blair looks as if she’s going to start a cat fight right here and I’m the one she’s gunning for.
I can feel the explosion in the air and I’m just waiting on the attack, but then the guy from earlier, who I’m sure I recognize from high school… Shawn maybe… comes over and offers to take me home. He must have been close to know I was leaving.
I leap at the chance to miss Blair giving Austin a public hand job. I smile at him. “Shawn, that would be great but I only live like ten minutes away, and I can walk.”
Shawn slaps Austin on the back. “Are you kidding? I don’t mind walking at all. The fresh air will do me good. See you soon, buddy.”
I say goodbye quickly before Austin can do anything but accept it.
But Austin is faster than I remember and is up out of his seat and pulling Shawn aside as I keep walking. Even though I’d never admit it aloud, I’m relieved to see that Blair wasn’t successful in trying to initiate a hand job. That fact seems to have really pissed her off if I’m going by the glare she gave me.
Poor Austin, he’s going to get an earful after I leave.
I no sooner get out the door and already Shawn’s caught up with me.
“You don’t remember me, do you?” I ask him.
He looks confused. “Do we know each other? I mean before tonight?”
He looks dumbstruck when I mention Mr. Todd’s computer lab we had together. “You used to cheat off me.”
He stops in the middle of the sidewalk. “That was you? Wow! You’ve gotten really sexy.”
I’m blushing and tongue tied by his admission. He’s so blunt, he’s probably too loaded to be making such declarations, but I’ll take the ego boost.
4
Austin
Instead of going home with my date last night, I dropped her off saying I had to work early this morning. I’m a mechanic and a great one at that, so it isn’t hard to sell it to Blair. Besides, I’m done messing around with her. I’ve told her from the get-go what she can expect from this, but she’s already too possessive and in my face.
It was late when I did get home. I showered and went straight to sleep with a smile on my face thinking about what a great surprise it is to have my best friend back in town.
I wake up early and even though I very well could go into my mechanic shop early and get work done—there’s always work to be done—I want to touch base with Laney. Seeing her last night put me at ease. At least I know she’s okay, and I don’t have to keep worrying about her. She’s home and she’s safe. Right now, that’s good enough. But I’m determined to find out what happened. And I understand with Blair there last night Laney hadn’t been able to really let me in on what was going on. But I can’t just let that hang in the air and wait around for her to fill me in.
I drive over to her parents’ house. On my way there the events from the night before replay in my head.
That feeling of Laney in my arms… it was so different.
I can’t deny the charge I felt, but just because I felt something it doesn’t have to mean that everything has changed. It didn’t mean anything. It was because it’d been so long since we’d seen each other in person that was all.
I park on the street in front of her parents’ house, noting that Laney’s dad seems to be working on his truck in the driveway. “Hey, Jerry!” I say as I walk up on him standing at the open hood of his Bronco. And even though I intended to continue up to the house to see Laney, I find myself offering to help Jerry with the truck.
“I imagine you’re here to see Laney. You sure you have time for this?” Jerry asks, gesturing to the engine under the open hood.
I don’t want to explain that I’m stalling for a little more time to let the events of the night settle into place before I see Laney. Instead I ask, “How is Laney this morning?”
“She’s doing just fine, all things considered,” Jerry answers. “Right now, she’s up in the kitchen with her mother making breakfast. I bet it’s about ready too. You hungry?”
I’m not all that hungry, but I’m not about to turn down a home cooked meal, especially since I like and respect Laney’s parents. Having breakfast with Laney in the company of her parents is a great way to get things back into our friendship groove. “I am, and there’s no way I’d turn down a home cooked meal if you’re offering,” I tell him.
Jerry nods and points out the issue he’s having with the engine. Jerry is a smart man, but he’s all thumbs when it comes to mechanics, and this isn’t the first time I’ve had to go in and undo the mistakes he’s made trying to fix it.
Rolling up my sleeves, I disconnect the hoses that Jerry’s confused and reattach them to the correct port. That’s just where I get started, though. Come to find out, he meant to change the oil and give the air conditioning some extra Freon to really cool things down. Lu
ckily he hadn’t gotten around to adding the Freon yet, because topping off the refrigerant is not going to make his AC work better, it’s going to blow it because there are pressure factors involved, and it takes knowing what you’re doing when it comes to the AC in vehicles.
Once I figure out the problem, I tell him, “I can give the AC a look at if you bring it down to the shop. But since you’ve got the oil on hand, I can change it now as thanks for breakfast.”
“Best hurry then. The women are gonna be calling us in any minute.” Jerry, who likes to make his wife Julia think that he knows how to fix his truck, thrusts the bottle at me. But I’m looking under the hood and not at Jerry, and as a result I get oil splashed over my shirt.
“Now I’ve done it. Sorry about that, Austin,” Jerry says.
I laugh it off and take off the shirt before the oil seeps into my skin and soaks into my jeans. I take the bottle from Jerry and recap the lid while I drain the oil first and then begin the refill. There’s black oil on my hands from working on the car and I’m trying to clean some of it off with the towel Jerry had on hand when Julia’s voice carries to my ears.
“Did you tell them breakfast is ready? What are you looking at?”
Looking up, I find Julia and Laney on the porch. But Laney is ignoring her mother. Instead, she’s staring at me with a look of appreciation. I get caught up in that stare, forgetting the fact that it’s my best friend up there. Forgetting the fact that both her parents are here, watching us. It’s like lust is burning in my brain and I can’t think of anything else. The heated charge that I felt the night before ignites again. It’s like a tug, low in my belly. I can feel my heart start to race, my palms get sweaty, and for the life of me, I can’t drag my gaze away from her.
The way she’s looking at me mirrors everything I’m feeling right now. I shouldn’t be looking at my best friend like this. I shouldn’t be thinking the thoughts I’m having right now, but there’s nothing or no one that could fully convince me of that. All I do know is, I can’t fuck this up.
Laney
How long have I been standing here staring?
I retrace my steps in my mind. I left the kitchen to come out and let my dad know breakfast was ready. The next thing I know I’m watching Austin climb out from under the car, shirtless, a smudge of black grease on his tight pectoral muscles, and good heavens his arms! His hair is off his shoulders in a ponytail. On anyone else it would look girly, but on him it’s only sexy. He’s always been fit, but Austin doesn’t look like an almost-man anymore. His shoulders are wider, his muscles are the lean, sexy kind that come from hard work. He’s on an all new level of sexiness and it has literally stolen my breath. All I could do was stand here and stare at him like a lusting, drooling fool.
My mom unfortunately announced my presence before I managed to stop staring, and Austin definitely caught me. It had to be all over my face how impressed I was by his physique because even from here I can see the flare of awareness in his eyes. I wait for disgust or pity to come across his face, but is that interest I see instead? No way! There’s no way Austin thinks of me that way. I shake my head, trying to snap myself out of it.
Great! Way to make things awkward, Laney!
“Looks like breakfast is ready. I’ll go and uh… find a shirt to loan you since I messed up the other one,” my dad says. He gives me a curious look as he passes me on the porch followed by another expression that I’m not quite sure what it means. I’m sure he’s wondering why I’m undressing my best friend with my eyes. Yeah, Dad, I know it’s wrong. I watch as my mom and dad disappear back in the house, then I take a deep breath before turning back to Austin.
He closes the hood on the truck and strides up the driveway with the confidence and presence of a man that owns the town.
I am not still admiring my best friend! Get it together, Laney!
“You’re up early. What brings you out this way?” I ask, doing my very best to relax and remind myself that I’m not his type, and even if I were it wouldn’t matter because our friendship is way too important to me to throw away on what would probably be a fling.
“We didn’t really get to talk last night, and I want to know what’s going on in your life. You’re my best friend, Laney.”
His words make me feel even guiltier than I already did. I know he deserves an explanation, but before I get into it, my mom comes out onto the porch with two full plates already fixed and full of eggs, bacon, and biscuits. She sets them on the table on the front porch. “You two can eat out here and catch up. That way Austin won’t see my dirty kitchen,” she says.
I start to disagree since the kitchen isn’t dirty by any stretch of imagination, but my mom’s not having it. “Your dad and I are going to eat inside, it’s just too hot out here for us.” Then she pulls a folded white T-shirt out from where she had it tucked under her arm and hands it to Austin. “Here you go. Thank you for helping Jerry with the truck. I was sure he was going to break something,” she whispers and then clams up when my dad comes out and sets cups of coffee by our breakfast plates.
While I really, really love the view of Austin’s naked torso, I’m relieved when he puts on the T-shirt because at least I don’t have to try so hard to think straight. Although Austin is wider in the shoulders than my dad, and wow, he can really fill out a shirt. Look away, Laney! Look away! I tell myself.
5
Austin
We barely sit down and Laney asks me about the shop, but I know she’s just trying to change the subject. I let her, too, because even though I want to know what’s going on, I’m still trying to work things out in my head about what just happened here. My pulse is still racing from the way she was looking at me and my reaction to her. So yeah, if she wants to talk about the shop, I’ll do it. Anything to get back on track.
She praises me for the smart hires I’ve made in the last two months, and I remember telling her about them a week or so ago. “I drove by there the other day, it looks really good too. Not that it didn’t look good when your dad had it, but you’ve fixed it up really nice.”
Her words should thrill me, but instead they shock me a little. “Wait, you drove by the other day? How long have you been in town? And why didn’t you come in?”
Busted!
She stutters and stammers, knowing that I’ve caught her. I don’t even know where to start or how to start with everything. This is not like her… not like us. We’ve been best friends since grade school. We’ve always told each other everything. Why could she not come to me for this? It has to be bad.
I push my plate away, and instead of fisting my hands like I want to, I reach out and cover her one hand with mine.
I feel like I’ve given her enough time to settle and tell me what’s going on. Or maybe I’m just scared of what she’s hiding from me. “What happened with Keith?”
She shakes her head and rolls her eyes. Anyone else would think that she’s making fun or brushing something off. But I can see it clearly. She’s trying to hide the fact that she’s hurt and embarrassed. With a brave smile on her face, she tells me, “I caught him with another woman. Like, uh, having sex.”
I can see how much it hurt her, even if she’s not letting on. Seeing and knowing that Keith hurt her makes me want to tear the guy limb from limb, and it’s what I should have had a right to do, but instead she’s kept me out of the loop. “He didn’t deserve you, Laney Bug. You were always too good for him.”
She gives the same laugh she’s always done when I call her by the nickname I gave her the day we first met in 6th grade. She moves her hand out from under mine and pushes my plate back toward me. “Eat. I promise I’m fine. We’d actually been having problems for a while. I knew I needed to end it, but I kept thinking that I was being too picky and should give him a chance. But I didn’t know that he was cheating on me, not until I actually saw them together. It just moved everything along.”
I want to beat the guy up. I have so many things I can say right now about what a pig
the guy is, but I don’t. She doesn’t need to hear it. Not right now. “Do you need to go back and pick up your stuff? Let me go with you. Let me help.”
She lifts a piece of bacon to her mouth and chews it. “Actually, that’s the best part. I packed everything, rented a small U-Haul and brought it back a few days ago. Everything’s done.”
I’m glad it’s over, but there’s some things I just don’t understand. “Why didn’t you call me? I could have come to see you, helped you, been there. Didn’t you trust me to be there for you?”
Laney
Of everything that has happened, this is what I dreaded the most. Even when I was packing up things and loading it up, I knew I should have called Austin. He would have come; I never even questioned it. But I couldn’t bring myself to do it. And by not calling him, I’ve hurt him. I know I did. “Of course I trust you to be there for me, for anything. You’re my best friend.”
I can see my words don’t make him feel any better. It’s way too vulnerable, but I admit to him, “I was embarrassed. I still am really. I was with him for all the wrong reasons, and even when people I trusted”—I gesture to him—“warned me not to, I still got engaged to him.”
He reaches for me again and this time I let him wrap his hand around mine, lacing our fingers together. “You should never be embarrassed, not when it comes to me. You’ve seen me do all kinds of really stupid things. I want to be there for you. Don’t push me out of your life. That’s stone cold.”
I nod, knowing what he’s saying is true. “Even though it hurt to catch my fiancé cheating, if he’d been the right man for me it would have been devastating and realizing that made it all easier. I mean yeah, the last few weeks sucked, but I’m seriously fine.” I look straight into his eyes, wanting him to see the truth there. “Sometimes people have to go through some things on their own just to prove to themselves that they can,” I tell him, trying to explain it the best way I can.