by Lucy Gordon
‘What was that?’
‘I’m not “just a little afraid”. I’m scared stiff. To lose this chance-’ he gave a brief laugh ‘-if I get that film part, it could lead to so much.’
‘Yes, it would. There’d be a second film, and then a third, and studios would be falling over themselves to hire you.’
‘I’d be so much bigger than I am now, and then perhaps-’
‘Then even your father would have to give you some respect,’ she said. ‘Yes, he’ll be proud of you, and boast about you. “Hey, my son is Travis Falcon.”’
‘Yup! That’s it. It’s stupid, isn’t it? I’m a grown man, well, at least I pretend to be. I fool the others, but not you.’
‘Maybe I have my own ideas of what constitutes a grown man,’ she said.
‘Lucky for me.’
‘If he’s kind and gentle, generous and caring, that’s all I care about. You can stuff the macho business.’
‘You don’t think I’m making too much of today, do you?’ he asked. ‘It’s only a few hours spent fooling for the camera-’
‘It’s not going to win the victory on its own,’ she agreed. ‘But it’s a step on the road. Then you’ll take another step, and another, until you’re running so fast that nobody can catch you.’
‘We’ll be running,’ he corrected.
‘No, this is about you. I’m just backup. You’ll be a big, big star and you’ll make so much money that your father and your brothers will want to borrow from you.’
He grinned. ‘In my dreams. But yes, that’s where the road leads. I’ll become obsessed with money, and then they’ll know that I’m a real Falcon after all.’ He added quietly, ‘But do I want to travel that road?’
‘You won’t become obsessed with money,’ she told him. ‘Not you. What you make of it is up to you. It’ll be your road. Your decisions.’
‘What about yours?’
‘Yours,’ she said firmly. ‘Nobody else’s.’
He looked at her for a moment, then drew her close, wrapping his arms right around her and holding her against him.
‘What would I do without you?’ he murmured against her hair. ‘Don’t leave me, because I couldn’t bear that. I… You see, if I could only… Just don’t leave me.’
She stroked his hair, deeply touched by what she’d seen inside him. Travis might say what he liked about money and stardom, but that was a front. Inside him there still lived a little boy, longing for his father’s attention and the feeling that he belonged in the family that always seemed to exclude him. She tightened her arms, instinctively seeking to protect that little boy.
‘Don’t worry,’ she said. ‘I’m here as long as you need me.’
‘Charlie-’
The doorbell rang.
‘That’ll be Rick, come to collect us,’ Travis said reluctantly.
She raised a clenched first. ‘Forward into battle.’
He mimicked the gesture. ‘Victory awaits.’
They were to travel in an open car, the better to be seen. When they were seated in the back, Rick drove them down to where Joe was waiting with several of the others.
‘Most of them have gone on ahead,’ he told them. ‘It looks more natural if we don’t all arrive together. Let’s get started.’ But when he saw Travis’s arm about Charlene’s shoulders he looked doubtful. ‘I’m not sure that’s enough. Maybe you should be leaning close so that your head is resting on Travis’s shoulder.’
‘Occasionally,’ Charlene agreed. ‘But this journey is new to me, so I think he’d be pointing things out. I’d say, “Oh how wonderful!” and we’d interact.’
‘Great! You’ve got a real talent for giving directions.’
‘You’re telling me,’ Travis said with feeling. ‘You should see how hen-pecked I am at home.’
Everybody laughed and they set off down the Santa Monica Freeway. It was a merry start to the day.
After an hour’s drive they reached the roads that led to the beach, and the car slowed down so that passers-by could see them. Now Charlene rested her head on his shoulder, as per instructions, and he laid his own head against her hair. Joe, overtaking, gave a thumbs up sign. Perfect!
About twenty of the crowd from the show had arrived before them and had taken over a small section of the beach, entertaining photographers with their antics while everyone awaited the star.
Vera, who’d looked after Charlene on the first day, approached, saying, ‘Your changing huts are over here.’
They each vanished into a hut, emerging a few moments later to stand in the sun, breathing in the fresh air with expressions of ecstasy, while secretly sizing each other up.
Now Charlene knew she’d been right to come on this trip. Not for anything would she have missed the sight of Travis in tight black swimming trunks, reminiscent of the other night. He was everything she remembered, lightly tanned, smooth chested, the perfect combination of lean and muscular.
But he seemed less pleased, frowning a little at her modest one piece. ‘I thought you’d have chosen a bikini.’
‘Tut, tut!’ she murmured. ‘Your respectable girlfriend doesn’t flaunt herself like that. Besides,’ she added in a tone of coming down to earth, ‘I’m too skinny for a bikini.’
‘You’re not skinny,’ he said. ‘Just beautifully slim. There are models who’d give their eye-teeth for your figure.’
‘Thank you, kind sir, but I’d still like to be more curvaceous where it matters. Like here.’ She wriggled her behind to give him a better view. ‘Wouldn’t that bit be improved by a little more oomph?’
‘No,’ he said with feeling. ‘It wouldn’t.’
‘Oh, come on, take a proper look.’
‘I am taking a proper look,’ he said in a strained voice. ‘It’s perfect as it is.’
‘Well, that’s very kind but I suppose you’ve got to say it, haven’t you? We both know I need a bit more there. Perhaps I should try to put on some weight.’
‘I warn you, do that and you’ll be sorry.’
‘Ooh, the dominant male,’ she teased. ‘I thought you didn’t do macho.’
‘Maybe it’s time I tried.’
By now they had reached the water. She hopped in front of him, dancing backwards through the tiny waves.
‘C’mon,’ she taunted. ‘Make me sorry.’
‘Whatever could I do that would make you sorry?’
The thought, You could send me away from you, and I’d be sorry for ever flashed through her mind, but was banished. Nothing was going to spoil today.
‘You’ll never find out,’ she said, moving faster.
But that was a mistake. She lost her balance and rocked wildly until he seized her and drew her against himself to steady her. She had a wild sensation of his bare chest against her and clung to him, wishing the rest of the world would just vanish.
Joe appeared beside them.
‘Nice stuff, but go back to shore. Charlene, I don’t want you swimming just yet because of your hair. Travis, why don’t you carry her?’
‘Happy to oblige,’ he said, grinning and sweeping her up into his arms.
True to her role, she clung to him, shaking her head so that her hair could float in the sun. As they emerged from the water the rest of the cast was there, playing games, tossing balls about, cheering them.
Then Travis saw something that soured his mood.
‘What the devil is he doing here?’
‘Who?’
‘Him.’ He jerked his head in the direction of a young man capering by the water’s edge.
‘Oh, it’s Lee,’ Charlene said. ‘Well, nearly everyone’s here, so I suppose he was bound to be included. And look, there’s Penny.’
Penny was laying firm claim to her fiancé, which should have eased Travis’s mind, but didn’t.
How did she feel about him? Travis wondered. She said it was over but now he knew that she was an accomplished actress. That was fine for presenting a mask to others, but he hated to think that s
he might be presenting a mask to him.
‘Shouldn’t you put me down now?’ she said.
‘Not until I have Joe’s permission,’ he said firmly, marching away up the beach.
She chuckled and buried her face in his shoulder. He only wished he could be sure she wasn’t looking back at Lee.
Vera was waiting with a large white towel spread out on the sand. Travis dropped to his knees and laid her out so that she showed to best advantage. Then he lay down beside her, propping his head up on one hand and gazing down adoringly.
She gazed back up, trying to match his expression. It was easy. Too easy, she thought with a flicker of alarm.
He’s only acting, said the warning voice in her mind. Don’t forget that.
And I’m acting too, replied her sensible self. I’m not falling in love with him. I’m not! I’m not! I’m not.
‘Let’s do this later,’ she said. ‘It’s too soon to lie down.’ She rose hurriedly, needing to get further away from Travis. This was dangerous.
Someone had brought beach balls, which were tossed high in the air. Much chasing and jumping followed, showing off several figures to advantage. But none were quite as fine as Travis’s figure, Charlene thought with appreciation.
Following the ‘stage directions’, they held hands to walk along the water’s edge, chased each other, laughed into each other’s faces and generally gave an expert performance.
His arm about her was strong and delightful and she was emboldened to raise her hand and lay it against his chest. She could feel the faint beat of his heart against her fingers and knew there had never been a moment as sweet as this in her life. Perhaps there never would be again, so she would remember and treasure this for ever.
‘How are you managing?’ he asked, leaning down so that he could speak quietly.
‘I’m enjoying it. I said I’d do anything and I meant it.’
For a moment something flickered in his eyes. ‘Anything at all?’
‘What do you think?’
‘I wish I knew what to think.’
From nearby, Joe, always keeping watch, complained, ‘You both look too serious. Say something to each other.’
‘You’re treading on my foot,’ Charlene told Travis fervently.
‘Something nice,’ Joe corrected.
‘You’re the most handsome man in the world,’ she declared.
‘Now you’re just making him laugh,’ Joe protested.
‘What do you expect?’ Travis demanded, grinning. ‘How can anyone keep a straight face like this?’
Some journalists and photographers appeared.
‘Hey, Travis, tell us about your lady. All Los Angeles is talking about her.’
‘Then you don’t need me to tell you,’ he said in a voice that sounded slightly uneasy.
She wondered if he feared to offend her by saying too much and was sure of it when he patted her hand, murmuring, ‘Don’t worry.’
‘Aw, c’mon. Just a quote. How did you meet?’
‘We bumped into each other in the studio,’ she said. ‘I’d lost my way and he…he found it for me.’ She gave a mysterious smile. ‘Maybe. Now, I think that’s all, don’t you?’
As they resumed their walk she said, ‘I hope you don’t think I said too much.’
‘That was brilliant!’ Joe spluttered. ‘The perfect story. You’re really good at this, isn’t she, Travis?’
‘Yes,’ he said quietly. ‘She is.’ He glanced over his shoulder at the paparazzi still in pursuit and said in a harassed voice, ‘Don’t they ever give up?’
‘They’re waiting for you to kiss her,’ Joe informed him. ‘Get on with it.’
He slid quickly away lest he be caught in the picture.
‘He’s right,’ Travis said.
‘Of course he is.’
‘I’m sorry.’
‘We have to be professional,’ she assured him.
The sun was beginning to set, throwing a golden glow over the sand and making the water glitter. As if united by the same thought, they strolled a little way into the sea and paused, gazing into each other’s faces.
Gently he pushed the hair back from her face.
‘Time to be professional,’ he said, and lowered his mouth.
She’d thought herself braced against the impact but knew instantly that nothing could have guarded her from the feel of his lips. Gentle, hesitant, then firm, pleading, enticing, commanding.
It was all an act, she reminded herself wildly-mostly on the surface to fool the cameramen, and just a little between them to provoke her into the right reaction. Nothing for real.
Remember that!
But it was hard to remember while she was held so strongly against his chest, his bare legs against hers, his arm behind her head, holding her close.
Feelings chased each other through her in confusing whirls. Pleasure, excitement, a feeling that life had opened up new possibilities. But also fear, because she knew she was on the verge of losing control. She wanted him more-and more-and any moment now-
‘That’s it, gentlemen,’ came Joe’s voice out of the mists. ‘Mr Falcon just wanted a pleasant day, without you invading his privacy. Time you went.’
Nobody was fooled but they had what they wanted, and they began to drift away.
‘Are you all right?’ Travis asked softly.
‘Yes, I…I’m all right.’
‘I’m sorry about this. It’s not what you signed up for.’
‘Everything’s fine. I’m not going to make trouble, I promise you. Sensible and level headed. That’s what we agreed, and that’s what I’m giving you.’
He hesitated a moment, as though something had taken him by surprise. But then he gently released her, saying, ‘Of course. I know you always keep your word. It’s time we were going home.’
Now they would be alone and something more might happen between them, she thought happily. But Joe intervened like an awkward demon, announcing that he’d booked a table for them at one of the city’s most glamorous restaurants.
So the performance continued that evening under glittering chandeliers. They talked but it meant nothing. Charlene had a sense that he was keeping slightly distant, as though wary after the day’s events. She could be patient. Perhaps when they got home he would speak more freely.
But at last he closed his eyes and said, ‘I think I’ve had too much to drink. We should get home before I have an embarrassing collapse.’
He left with his arm around her shoulders, murmuring, ‘You don’t mind propping me up, do you?’
She patted his hand. ‘It’s what I’m here for,’ she said tenderly.
Charlene looked forward to taking him home, seeing him warm and comfortable, even perhaps happy. That was really all she asked. That he should be happy.
There was no hint then of what was to come, and how it would devastate him.
CHAPTER TEN
AS SOON as they reached home Travis put on the television, as he always did, to catch up with the news. Almost at once he tensed, staring at the screen.
‘Isn’t that-?’ Charlene gasped.
‘That’s my father,’ he confirmed, turning up the sound.
‘…people who remember Amos Falcon from the old days are intrigued to see him in action again, and this conference in New York…’
Dazed, Travis sat down on the sofa, his eyes fixed on the screen. Charlene sat beside him, trying to imagine how this would be affecting him.
It seemed that Amos Falcon had been in New York for three days, during which time he had attended meetings and socialised with men as wealthy as himself. The only thing he hadn’t done was contact his son in Los Angeles.
Suddenly she felt Travis grow even more tense. Another man had appeared on the screen. He was in his thirties, had a facial resemblance to Amos and seemed on the best of terms with him.
‘…his son, Darius Falcon, who once seemed to have withdrawn from the world of finance, but who’ll be joining his father in this new o
pportunity…’
The item ended. Travis sat frozen.
‘He’s in New York,’ he murmured. ‘What time is it there?’
‘Three hours ahead of us,’ Charlene said. ‘He should be in bed by now.’
‘A good time to call him, then. No, wait.’
He began clicking buttons on his cellphone, looking for a message, Charlene thought. But there was nothing.
‘They didn’t say where he was staying,’ she said. ‘So where could you call him? Perhaps someone in his home would know. If you called-’
‘No!’ Travis interrupted her violently. ‘Never.’
Of course he wasn’t going to advertise that his father had ignored him, Charlene thought, blaming herself for thoughtlessness.
Travis named a hotel. ‘He’s always stayed there in the past.’
He dialled a number. Charlene moved quietly away. She had a horrible fear of what was about to happen, and knew he would hate anyone to see it.
But she left her bedroom door open and heard him say, ‘Fine, when he comes in would you give him a message? I’ll give you my home number and my cellphone. Any time will do, night or day.’
He hung up and turned to see her standing in the door.
‘Goodnight,’ he said. ‘You’ve had a long, tiring day.’
His message was plain. He’d spoken often of their closeness and his reliance on her, yet she could not help him now.
Quietly she closed the door.
Twice more during the night she rose and looked out discreetly. He was still there, silent and motionless. Never once did the phone ring.
There could be a simple answer. Amos might have stayed out overnight, or returned late and noted the message for later. The call would come. Surely it must.
Over breakfast she asked for the latest news, not revealing how much she knew.
‘I fell asleep,’ Travis said indifferently. ‘If the phone rang I might not have heard it.’
Her heart was heavy as she saw him off to work. Instinct warned her to fear the worst. She knew of Travis’s feeling of isolation, of being shut out from the heart of the family. He was obsessively aware of his father’s indifference to him, bordering on contempt. Now she saw the reality.