The complete scars series: Books one-four

by Tonks, Rachael

  Dropping my purse on the table beside the door, I race over to the huge living room window that overlooks the parking lot. I wave to Mom who is waiting in the car below. She nods, waves, and makes her way out of the lot. It’s been great spending time with Mom. We don’t always see eye to eye but getting the time to rebuild our relationship is something I’m grateful for.

  Moving back from the window, I drop onto the couch, sighing heavily as I glance around my apartment.

  It’s good to be home.

  Really good.

  Resting my head back against the couch, I allow my eyes to close momentarily. The unexpected sound of my cell phone buzzing in my purse snaps me from my moment of silence. I jump up from my seated position, grabbing my purse and pulling out my phone.

  “Hey,” I say, answering the call.

  “Hey,” he replies sweetly. “How are you?” I recognize the nervousness in his voice.

  “I’m good, Nate,” I reply, trying to reassure him. “But I’ve missed you,” I add meekly.

  “Fuck, I’ve missed you so much, Tara. When you plan on coming home, huh? I really want to see you.”

  “I’m… uh… I’m home.”

  “Baby, why didn’t you tell me?” he asks, and I can tell he’s annoyed.

  “I just got home. My mom dropped me off.”

  “I’m coming to see you tonight.”

  My body starts to shake. I want to see him so much, but how do I explain it if I freak out when he touches me? Or if I can’t be intimate with him? How do I even begin to explain that shit? I start to walk around my apartment, my body trembling at the thought of seeing him.

  “Can’t wait,” I say, pushing aside my reservations. Because when it comes down to it, my love for Nate is what got me in trouble in the first place.

  “I, uh, I have to bring Emily. It’s the only way I can get out of the clubhouse without being followed.”

  “Shit…” I exhale heavily. “They’re still following you?”

  “Can’t take any chances, babe. The whole club is at war because a deal that my father pushed for went south. We lost a brother. He’s losing his power. His men are starting to turn on him,” he explains in a hushed voice. “It won’t be like this forever. I promise. You and me, we'll be together.”

  I swallow down the sting of sick in my throat. Can we really survive what happened? Can we really be together after he realizes what his father has done, and he finds out what a liar I am?

  “Babe,” he says a little louder, snapping me from my thoughts.

  “Sorry, yeah, that’s fine. I guess I owe her thanks for helping out.”

  “I think you’ll really like her,” he says, and I can tell he’s smiling.

  “I’m sure I will,” I reply sweetly. “See you later.”

  Ending the call, I drop my phone on the couch and head into the bedroom. I strip off my clothes, dropping them in the laundry basket. Heading into the bathroom, turning on the shower, I wait a few seconds for the water to run warm before stepping under the stream. I welcome the warm water as I rub over my face. Grabbing a washcloth, I work over my body, my eyes scanning for any bruises. I have to be sure there are none on show. Faint marks still appear around my inner thigh. Luckily, those are covered quite easily. Quickly washing my hair, I rinse out the suds before finally cutting off the stream. Stepping from the shower, I grab a towel, wrapping it around my body. I grab a second towel, rubbing it over my dripping hair. The sound of my cell phone ringing catches my attention and I race back into the living room, grabbing it from where it rests on the couch.

  “Hello?” I answer breathlessly.

  “Tara.” His voice reverberates down the receiver. I hold the phone from my ear, my hands shaking uncontrollably. “Don’t hang up,” I hear him shouting down the phone.

  “Just leave me alone,” I choke out, barely placing the phone to my ear.

  “Listen, baby,” he drawls. “I think we got off on the wrong foot. Let me make it up to you.”

  “You… you… raped me,” I spit back. “You fucking monster.”

  He hums down the phone. “I think you’ve got me all wrong.”

  “Why are you doing this to me?” I ask, trying to get some clarity on what is happening here.

  “Because I can. You flaunted yourself in front of me, and I decided that I wanted you there and then. When I made a deal with your cousin, that shit was for real. I’m just claiming my part of the deal. I have to say, if you keep making this hard I will have to start hurting your family. Don’t think for a second I didn’t know you were with your mom for the past few weeks.”

  “Fuck you!” I scream, ending the call and throwing the cell phone against the couch, like the damn thing is on fire. Sinking to the floor, I bawl like a baby, rocking back and forth as I clutch the wet strands that have fallen over my face.

  Will this nightmare ever end?

  Nate

  I lean back onto the seat of my bike on the remote wooded path, waiting for Brax to arrive. Pulling out a smoke, I light it and take a huge drag.

  I see the SUV approaching and I stand, stepping closer to it as it slows. Finally coming to a complete stop, Brax jumps from the SUV.

  “Hey, man,” he says, opening his arms and I take his embrace, patting him loudly on the back. “How’re things going?”

  “Good,” I reply. “Real fucking good, Brax. There’s a definite shift in power at the club. The men don’t trust my father and have wanted reasons to get him from the head of the table for a long time.”

  “I fucking knew it,” he says leaning back against the van, his arms crossed over his chest.

  “What?”

  “You. Head of the table. I knew it from the first time we worked together dealing with that motherfucker Alvrez.”

  I hold up my hands, cocking my head. “Let’s not get carried away just yet.” I let out a little chuckle, taking another drag of my smoke.

  “The one thing that concerns me, Nate, is you taking him out. Not only is he your father, he’s the president. If the club finds out you took out a brother, there’ll be no trust there. Can’t run a club on no trust.”

  “I have no conscience when it comes to doing what needs to be done.”

  “I don’t see it, Nate.” He smirks. “I have no doubts that your father would take you out. But the other way around.” He shakes his head. “I’m not so sure.”

  “You don’t think I got the balls, man?” I ask, my voice low as annoyance fuels me. I flick my cigarette to the ground, returning my focus back to Brax.

  “Hey. Hey.” He draws his brows together, standing tall and dropping his arms by his side. “That’s not what I’m saying and you know it.”

  “Just what the fuck are you saying, man?”

  “I’m saying that you’re better than that. It isn’t about having the balls, it’s about you having a better moral conscience than that asshole of a father.”

  “He’s been threatening Tara. He wants what is mine, and for that, I’ll fight to the death. Tara is my future and if it means leaving my father in the past, so fucking be it.”

  “I can handle this, Nate. I can make it so that you never have to be questioned about your father’s death. Men that will take him out, leaving us clean out of it.”

  I nod, appreciating the offer. “That would be the easy option. I feel like I owe it to Tara to be the one to end this.”

  “Well, the offer stands. I’m only a call away.”

  “Thanks, man.”

  “Don’t mention it. How is Tara? She seems to be avoiding me.”

  “She’s back, man,” I say offering him a smile.

  “What do you mean?” he spits back.

  “Yeah. Got back today. I spoke to her earlier and arranged to see her tonight.”

  “Is that safe? Shit...” He blows out a breath. “She should be with us. I want her at my place where I know she’s safe.”

  “She ain’t going for it, man. It didn’t work last time, and it won’t if you tr
y again. You can’t push her. She’s a stubborn fuck.”

  “Ain’t that the truth,” he replies with a chuckle. “So, what can I do for you, man? Why all the secrecy and meeting here?”

  “I need you to get me some intel on the Deathseekers. I need to find out exactly what went down that day and why. But most importantly get me some background on the son, Tyler.”

  “Okay,” he replies pressing his lips together, tilting his head ever so slightly. “But why? Why so much interest in Tyler?”

  “I don’t know, man. I got a good feeling from him on the meet. If my feelings are right, maybe enhancing him to Prez and creating a new alliance would work in the MC’s favor.”

  A smile twitches at his lip. “You’re a smart one. I like it. Thinking outside the box.”

  “Dealing drugs and weapons is not really my thing, man. It brings too much heat.”

  “But the drugs have made you guys a lot of money.”

  I sigh, stepping toward him and leaning back against his SUV. “Drugs were never a club thing. The drugs are a Jeffries thing. And yeah, it’s worked out so far. But it’s only a matter of time before the feds make the connection and it all blows back on the club.”

  “So what? You’re giving the outlaw lifestyle a miss?”

  “Nah, man. But what I propose is offering protection. Working with local businesses offering our services. I see it all the time. People come to my father asking for help. Because we are feared. But what if I turn that fear on its axis and use it as a tool? A way to make serious money. With the studio, the bike modification garage, and the gym, I think we can make enough money to keep the whole club comfortable, all while keeping the law off our backs.”

  “Easier said than done, man. That would mean an end to our working relationship.”

  “Listen, there are thousands of MC clubs out there willing to work with someone of your caliber…” I start to say, only to be cut off.

  “But I trust you.”

  I let out a rush of air, focusing on him standing in front of me. “Until I met Tara, nothing really made sense to me. I wasn’t living or feeling. I was simply existing. Fuck, I had nothing in my life that made any sense. I love the club, it’s all I know. The brotherhood is something that is so ingrained in me, that without it, I’m not sure what I’d do. But that need for the club is because I know no better. I’ve never known anything different until I met Tara. She showed me something I hadn’t realized I was missing. Before her I was numb. Numb to feelings and numb to life. But Tara has stirred something in me, some feelings that I never knew existed. So when I say I want to make this right, it’s for her. It’s fucked up just how much she makes me feel.”

  “Can’t argue with that,” he replies with a look of defeat on his face. “Listen, I’ll get my guys onto finding out about the Deathseeker kid. Soon as I have anything, I’ll let you know.” I hold out my hand, and he takes it, pulling me in for a man hug.

  “Appreciate it. Thanks, brother.”

  Parting, I watch as he makes his way back inside the truck, turning and heading back down the beaten path. I mount my bike, following him and heading back to the clubhouse.

  * * *

  Pulling up outside, I back my bike in line with the rest. I walk past the front porch, making my way inside. The dull hum of music plays, and I head straight into the main clubhouse. Zane and Davo are waiting on me and I smile at Emily who is cleaning glasses behind the bar. I give her a nod, and she smiles sweetly.

  “Hey, brother,” Davo welcomes me.

  “Hey, man,” I say walking over to them at the pool table.

  “So, any news?”

  I quickly bring the guys up to speed with my meeting with Brax.

  “I don’t know why we haven’t killed those motherfuckers already,” Zane whisper-growls.

  “I know it still hurts, and I promise, you will have your vengeance. But we have to be smart. We need to find exactly who’s behind the attacks since the Deathseekers are denying responsibility.”

  “But we know it’s them,” Zane yells.

  “But we need proof. I also think someone from the inside is involved in the orchestration of what happened.”

  “Our crew?” Davo asks with a look of disbelief.

  I nod. Leaning in, I lower my voice until it’s barely audible. “I’m pretty sure my father had something to do with this. Why else would he jump into bed with the Deathseekers?”

  Zane gives me firm nod. “True, man. He’s hated them for so long. Why the sudden change?”

  “Exactly,” I reply with a lift of my brow. “Whatever has happened, I’m getting to the bottom of it. Just watch your fucking backs, boys. I’m not sure the current prez can be trusted.”

  “It’s time for a re-vote,” Davo interjects. “You know we all want you at the head. There is only one person to vote against you. You have the majority, man.”

  “Let’s take it to the table and put it to a vote then,” I say, pushing myself away from the table and striding over to Emily. “Hey, baby,” I say for added effect.

  “Hey, handsome,” she throws back sarcastically.

  I roll my eyes, a small laugh tugging at the corner of my lips. “Tonight. You and me ride. Be ready.”

  She lets out an excited squeal, clapping her hands together lightly.

  “Glad to see you settling in around here,” I say leaning over to her a little.

  “The shift in power seems to have done that. Silver and Jeffries rarely come in here anymore. Plus,” she says tipping her head toward the guys at the pool table. “They both stay close by.”

  I glance over to the pair at the table, realizing what a good pair of guys I have by my side. I’m floored that they believe in me and support me. Over a year ago, if someone had told me where I’d be today, I wouldn’t have believed them. There’s just one thing left to put right now. I have to fix the damage I did between me and Tara. I have to right my wrongs.

  “Six p.m. sharp,” I say, slapping my palm against the wooden bar. “Be ready.”

  Tara

  I jump at the loud banging sound coming from the door. I push myself from my slumped position, jerking in surprise at the sight of Brax standing at the side of the couch.

  “What the hell are you doing on the floor?” he asks, dropping to the floor beside me. But I can’t look at him.

  Grabbing my chin, he lifts my gaze until it meets his. “What the fuck happened?” His eyes rake over my semi-naked body as I cling to the towel.

  “I was, uh, I was showering,” I reply, pushing my hair away from my face and sliding up from the floor, groaning as I do. “I got a call on my cell. It was him, Brax. It was Jeffries.”

  “Bastard,” he spits, venom in his tone. “What did he say?”

  “That he still wants to claim his end of the deal and that he’d start hurting my family if I didn’t start cooperating.” I swallow the bile that rises in my throat at the thought of him hurting my mom. The only real family I have.

  “He wouldn’t dare,” Brax growls, wrapping his hand firmly around the back of my neck and pulling me into his hard chest. “I just came from a meeting with Nate.”

  I pull back, looking up at his huge eyes that appear clouded with hate. I shudder at the intensity. I don’t fear Brax. But I know how explosive and dangerous he is. How he wouldn’t think twice about using violence to get what he wants.

  “Nate is dealing with the issue of his father. You have my word on that. He won’t be an issue for much longer. But until then, I’ll have one of my men to watch over you and your mom. So don’t freak out if you see someone following you.”

  “No,” I decline, shaking my head from side to side in a feeble attempt to stop him.

  “There’s no discussion, Tara. If it was up to me, you’d be back at my place where I can keep an eye on you.”

  “Didn’t work out so well last time,” I say with a cock of my brow.

  His eyes open wide and he frowns at me. “I was trying to keep you safe,” he s
ays, his voice quiet and strained. “What happened to you that night, Tara?”

  I pause for a second, allowing my eyes to drift down to my fingers as I play with the edge of the towel still wrapped around my torso. Tears prick my eyes as I’m torn between being honest and keeping my dirty secret. Everything will blow all out of control if I tell him what happened.

  “I don’t remember all that much, Brax. I was shitfaced and heartbroken. I left the club and walked as far as I could before calling for a cab. Before the cab came, someone jumped me, taking my money and leaving me at the side of the road.”

  “Man? Woman? Type of vehicle?” he presses aggressively for more information.

  “I don’t remember,” I sniffle.

  A rush of breath escapes him, and I can’t help but feel guilty as my stomach knots and my chest tightens. I hate lying to him. But I don’t feel like I have any other choice.

  “You put yourself at risk,” he scorns. “Don’t let it happen again. You’re smarter than that, Tara.”

  “I was stupid. I’m sorry.”

  “Babe, I’m going to have someone come and improve the security here. I got in without you even knowing.”

  My eyes flicker over to the door and I realize in the state of exhaustion, I hadn’t even thought about how he’d got in here.

  “I suppose you can do whatever you like since you own the whole goddamn apartment block.”

  He chuckles, grazing his hand across my hand. “We care about you, Tara. Izzy and I.”

  “I love you guys, you know that. You’re like family to me.” I smile widely, meaning every word.

  “Family or not, I’m also your boss. I want you back in work tomorrow. No excuses. Those bars and accounts won’t run themselves.” He pushes himself up from the couch, bending and kissing me lightly on the top of my head.

  “Go get dressed before you catch a cold,” he orders.

  “Yes, Dad,” I mock a little, following him over to the door and dropping the bolt after him.