by Rossi, Carla
“She is heartbroken for you about the baby. She had every intention of retiring from ministry and being a plain old civilian grandma.”
Gia smiled. “I got that impression. Tell her to keep her resignation letter handy. I’m going to need her help.”
“I’ll do that.” He drummed his fingers on the desk. “Why are you really here, Gia? Your husband is worried sick.”
She stood and wandered around the matching chairs, running her hands along the smooth surface as she moved.
“My husband doesn’t know how much I love him. I stink at this relationship thing. I made him so mad he cracked a kitchen table almost in half with his bare hands. Make that one hand. I’m crazy about him, but I have trouble expressing that because I’m afraid he’ll reject me, which is ridiculous because he’s shown me over and over and over how much he cares about me.”
“It’s clear he loves you very much.”
“I made a lot of irresponsible mistakes as I was growing up. Horrible choices. I don’t know why God let me live through some of them but He did.”
“Your mother and I spent most of your life on our knees on your behalf. I believe your life today is an answer to prayer and because you have a greater purpose. Nothing has been wasted on you, Gia. You’ll use every lesson you’ve learned as you find your ministry.”
“Probably.” She returned to the chair. “I did a lot of sinful things and was in the process of completely disintegrating until I woke up one day at school and said enough is enough. I thought things would get better. Instead they got worse because now I was aware of all I’d done and was overwhelmed with shame. And bad things kept happening to me. Then something good would happen—like Rocky—and I thought I was in the clear. Then something bad again—like the loss of the baby—and I began to think I was never going to be truly happy because I had to pay for my sin. I thought God was punishing me.”
The loud squeak of her father’s chair startled her as he practically leapt from behind his desk and hurried to her side. He dropped into the matching seat. “You know that’s not how it works, Gia. Sure, there are natural consequences to choices we make, but God does not wait around the corner to thump you on the nose when you’ve messed up.”
She shrugged. “Maybe not, but when that thought hit me I went right back to bad, impulsive habits, and contemplated ways I could run away from the pain. I started sabotaging my relationship with Rocky because I thought I didn’t deserve to be happy. But the truth is I love him more than anything, so I couldn’t afford to let that happen. I had to find a way to face things and forgive myself and others.”
“And that’s why you’re here.”
“That’s why I’m here. On top of my impulsive nature and horrid self-esteem issues, I’ve also held on to some anger against you. I’ve decided it’s not worth it. Even the Bible says to clear the air once in a while so I need to do that. I blamed you for a lot of things that went wrong in my life. I was angry because I believed you put this church before me and because I believed you put distance between me and my mother when you made her choose you and the church over me. I don’t care anymore if there’s any truth to that, but there was a day I feel you really let me down and it’s time for me to let go of that grudge. There was a day I stood here in this very office and told you I was being violated by someone I was supposed to be able to trust. You didn’t believe me. In fact, you made me go back there.”
“That is the one big regret of my life, Gia.”
“Yet you never bothered to share that with me.”
“There’s no defense. You were a child. I should have protected you. I should have investigated further. I have no excuse except I told myself if your mother found out, I would surely lose her and you. We were having a rough time then. I didn’t react like I should have because your mother was one heartbreak away from taking you and leaving forever.”
This was a surprise. They’d had tough spots, but her mother leave her father and the church? That was going to be one interesting conversation next time she talked to her mom.
“I didn’t know that.”
“Not many people do, but it’s currently not the point. I failed you, and your mother never knew.”
“Oh, I figured that part out a while ago. I never understood how you could both let me down so horribly. The man was a criminal. I couldn’t imagine how a fierce mama bear mother wouldn’t have ripped that guy to shreds with her teeth for what he was doing—let alone what he could be doing to other girls. Then I realized she didn’t know.”
“Again, I have no excuse. I’m sorry. What can I do? What can I say?”
There was nothing.
He could say he was sorry all day, and it didn’t change anything. She could say history repeats itself in the most appalling ways with the most despicable predators, but what would it serve to make him suffer further?
“You don’t have to say anything, Daddy. I’ve wasted too much time on it already. I choose to forgive you for that. I choose to move on.”
She stood to leave.
“Wait.” He stood, too, and scratched the back of his head. He clearly hadn’t expected the emotional hit-and-run and must have expected something more. “We can talk further about this,” he said. “Aren’t you coming to the house? It’s late. You need to rest. Your mother wants to see you.”
“I’m fine. As far as I’m concerned, this takes care of it. If you have something to take up with me, we’ll be back in a couple weeks and I’ll be ready to talk. Right now I’m going home to my husband.”
“Gia, stop.”
She paused with her hand on the door.
“You’re a beautiful woman, Gia. I love you, and I’m proud of you.”
“Thank you. I love you, too.”
She’d been wrong earlier. Now she’d never been more free.
19
Gia got home in the middle of the night.
Rocky was asleep on the couch with the TV blaring and all the lights on. He woke up when she took the remote.
“Don’t get up,” she said and clicked off the television. She tugged at the corner of the blanket. “Scooch over.”
“No.”
“No?”
“Not until you promise to never do that again. I mean it, Gia. Don’t ever run off like that again.”
Overwhelming love pulsed through her veins. He didn’t deserve to worry or doubt her. Not for one more second. “I promise. I’m sorry I worried you.”
“Me, worried? No...I was only a basket case. The whole band is up in arms praying for your safe return. Your doctor’s office called today to confirm your follow-up appointment on Friday, and I’m like I don’t know anything because she up and left me.”
“I’m sorry,” she said again. “And I didn’t leave you. I had some things to take care of, and I promise I’ll never do it that way again. Please move over.”
He moved but he didn’t let her lie down. He scooped her off her feet instead and kissed her senseless before tucking her safely against him.
He pulled up the blanket. “I only fell asleep because your dad said you should be here any minute. I tried to wait up but I haven’t slept, and I’m supposed to be at camp in about eight hours—”
“Shhh...” She swept locks of hair away from his forehead. “We’ll get some sleep and get you there on time. I have to tell you a couple things.”
“If it’s bad news, don’t bother. I can’t take it.”
“Not bad news. No more bad news. I want you to know I took care of that confrontation we talked about.”
He stiffened. “You just couldn’t let me help you with that, could you?”
“No one could help me with that. It only took a minute. I saw him, I told him me and the police knew, and I gave him a Bible.
“So you were close to the—”
“I wasn’t close. I put it in a bag and left it for him to pick up when I walked away.”
“You gave the rapist a Bible?”
“Why not? It’s what
he needs.”
“You’re a better person than me, Gia.”
“I don’t know about that. I also saw my father and buried the hatchet with him. Learned a couple things, too. We can talk about that another time.”
“Do you feel better?”
“Infinitely.”
He yawned and stretched and then pulled her closer still. “What else?”
“I saw Ty when I went to work. He’s a mess, but he’ll be all right. I don’t think his aunt and uncle know exactly what to do to help him, and I don’t think he’s had much motivation to help himself.”
“It happens. You have to want to be healthy and active when you end up in a chair. It happened to me as an adult, and I had to make a way for myself. Can’t imagine what it’s like for a kid, especially on top of a loss. Do you have any ideas about working with him?”
“I have lots of ideas. That’s where you come in.”
“You’re the child psychology person. I’m a computer nerd with possible brain limitations from too many hits to the head during twelve plus years of football.”
“Twelve plus years? When did you start?”
“This is Texas, baby. I think I was in first grade.”
“Never mind that. You have no brain limits. You are a genius. I’ve decided you can fix anything, do anything, solve anything—”
“I couldn’t keep my wife from leaving me.”
“I didn’t leave you. Don’t change the subject. I was talking with Ty, and I realized I only know what I know because I learned it from you. I’ve been optimistically curious about what God intended to do with us now that He brought us together and I think I might know.”
“Don’t keep me in suspense.”
“First you have to tell me something.”
“Here it comes...”
“I need to know about hand cycling.”
“And there it is.”
“Awww Rocky, I’m sorry I peeked in the top secret cave, but c’mon, why were you hiding that? I looked at something briefly online, and I can see why that’s an excellent sport for you.”
“I don’t know if I want to get into this tonight.”
“Start talking, cowboy. We both need some sleep so let’s get it all on the table. What exactly is a hand cycle?”
“It’s a type of recumbent bike. It’s powered by the arms rather than the legs. They are like tricycles in their frame because they have two coasting rear wheels and one steerable front wheel. Like all other bikes, there are different brands, styles, etc., but I enjoyed working on my own and developing my own ideas.”
“How did you do that?”
“There are hand cycling clubs same as there are chess clubs and astronomy clubs. I got together with other guys who had welding capabilities or pipe bending equipment and metal saws, stuff like that. We hung out, built bikes, and rode. Some raced. I was learning to do that.”
“Did you have those shiny, stretchy clothes cycling people wear?”
“That’s the part of the story you’re interested in?”
“I’m trying to get a visual here, and I think you’d look good in those shirts.”
“Yes, I have some cycling clothes around here.”
“Good. Continue. Why did you quit? You’re so strong and competitive and it looks like fun.”
“It was fun, but I got too intense about it. I was training, spending all my time with other racers. It’s almost like I couldn’t find a balance in my life. But remember this is before I found the church. Everything was out of whack and empty.”
“So what happened?”
“A bunch of us went out on a training ride. It’s always dangerous on the road, but we have people who follow us and motorists are usually good about it. But this day it went nuts. Somebody slowed, the person behind them didn’t. The next car in line was going too fast anyway and went to the shoulder without looking. Knocked two of our group off the road and over the embankment. We were tumbling down like dominoes. The car came so close to me I could feel it and smell it. I should be dead. I still don’t know how I’m not.”
“What about the others?”
“One guy died, but not at the scene. He got a secondary infection in the hospital and couldn’t fight it fast enough.”
“I’m sorry, Rocky.”
“I lost my passion for it after that. Someone called my mother from the hospital where we’d been taken. I was transported because I was banged up and needed some stitches. Infection is always a concern and it felt like I ripped my shoulder to shreds. My mom and dad got there and they didn’t know anything. The look in my mom’s eyes when they found me... She’s been through enough with me. I know things happen that are way beyond our control, but I decided I didn’t need to be a sitting duck on a highway. If I ever get back to it, I’ll do things differently.”
“And I would think a planned race is a closed course.”
“Oh yeah, but I never got that far. So that’s the story of my short-lived hand cycling adventure. Someone invited me to Cornerstone a couple weeks later, and I got busy with the band. Haven’t looked back.”
“But why the big secret?”
“It was never meant to be a big secret. I’m not a quitter. I didn’t want you to think I was. I was going to tell you about it.”
Gia’s mind crackled with the possibilities. “How soon can you put one of those things back together? You’ve got enough parts out there. Can you ride it around the neighborhood? We can go for rides together. I need a bike.”
“Take it easy. What’s the hurry?”
“You need to get back up to speed, so to speak. We have things to do.”
“What things, Gia? I don’t need any more things to do. Trying to keep my wife safe and in the same county is work enough for me.”
“Stop. I’m not going anywhere. Do I really have to draw you a map here? I’ve wanted to work with children since I can’t remember when. You have a gift for it. We’re in this situation for a reason. Kids like Ty are that reason. It’s our destiny to pool our ideas and talents and help kids.”
“No, I don’t need a map. I’ve been feeling it, too.”
“I’m going to camp with you tomorrow so I can talk to the directors there. They have experience with grant writing and fundraising. I’m going to pick their brains about how we can start our own deal for special needs children.”
“We can’t start a camp, Gia.”
“Not with that attitude we can’t. Maybe not this week, but sometime in the future.”
“Start smaller.”
“OK. First we have to get Ty in the pool. Then onto a hand cycle. Then we can have a game day at the community center for disabled kids. We’ll have food, prizes... Then we can have weekly activities for kids who need a boost. You can have a junior hand cycling club. I can do the emotional and relational stuff—”
“Gia.”
“I’ll work on a proposal for Coach. I bet he’ll be on board—”
“Gia.”
“We can do something through the church, too, so we can have a program with a faith-based approach.”
“Gia.”
“Yes?”
“We can get to all this tomorrow. All I want to do is hold you and sleep.”
“I love you, Rocky. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, but I do love you. Takes my breath away how much.”
“I love you, too, Gia. I should have said it, too. I guess that’s what happens when you do the whole thing backwards. You miss the fine details.”
“We’ll not miss them again.”
“I was scared to death when I came home and saw that note. I thought you were gone for good.”
“It said I’d be back.”
“Yes, but then I saw your room. All your things were packed. I thought you were moving out.”
“No, Rocky, I’m not moving out, I’m moving down the hall.”
“Oh. Ooooohhhhhh. Why didn’t you put a box in my room or something? I’ve literally had heart palpitations for two days.�
�
“I’m sorry, but it never occurred to me you would think I wasn’t coming back. It was in the note. We’re married. I love you, and I thought it was high time I spent the night with my husband. Plus, I heard he has a great spa-like shower deal.”
“He does. Get some sleep, and then we’ll try it out.”
“I love you, Rocky.”
“I love you, too, Gia.”
Thank you for purchasing this White Rose Publishing title. For other inspirational stories, please visit our on-line bookstore at www.pelicanbookgroup.com.
For questions or more information, contact us at [email protected].
White Rose Publishing
Where Faith is the Cornerstone of Love™
an imprint of Pelican Ventures Book Group
www.PelicanBookGroup.com
Connect with Us
www.facebook.com/Pelicanbookgroup
www.twitter.com/pelicanbookgrp
To receive news and specials, subscribe to our bulletin
http://pelink.us/bulletin_
May God’s glory shine through
this inspirational work of fiction.
AMDG